Who's Who in BabyWorld

I'm finishing up my book and am busy doing a little editing this week, so instead of wowing you with my awesome stories (HA!) I decided to do a little contest instead. I'm posting some baby pictures (Awwww, how cute!). They're all pictures of my kids. Guess who is who. (Hint: there aren't necessarily 6 babies pictured here because I'm just tricky like that.) So, go ahead and guess who's who. The first person with the most accurate number of guesses will win a $20 gift card for Babies R Us good at any stores or online. If you don't have little babies, you can use it for your grandchildren, nieces, nephews, neighbors, co-worker's kids, or buy a bunch of diapers and formula with it and donate them to your local food pantry.

My kids are:
Austin - 13
Savannah - 11
Jackson - 9
Lexington - 6
Clayton - 4
Brooklyn - 2

So here they are...

#1


#2


#3


#4


#5


#6

I Don't Wanna!

My kids would never dream of misbehaving. They are always polite and respectful. They wouldn't dare throw themselves down on the floor in an all-out tantrum. When I tell them it's time to go to bed, they cheerfully say, "OK Mommy!" Then they brush their teeth without being reminded, they lay out their clothes for the next day, and they say their prayers. They give me a kiss goodnight, thank me for making them eat broccoli at dinner, and tell me I'm the best mother ever. Even Brooklyn, who just turned two, is perfectly behaved and extremely agreeable as proven by this video.

Too Tired to Party

Last night I went to my parents' house for dinner. We all had a great time! My husband did good! Really good! He doesn't usually do much (if anything at all) for my birthday, but this year he got my something. Not only did he get me a present, but he didn't pick it up at the gas station today! He came up with an idea and ordered it ahead of time. I know! I almost fell over in shock too! He gave me 38 balloons and told me that my present was in one of them. (OK, the most horrible sound on earth is a squeaky balloon and just the thought of them gives me goosebumps. I had to pop the balloons until my present fell out of one of them.) He gave me diamond earrings! I can totally overlook the awful balloon noises because I'm just so impressed that he put so much thought into the present. And the way he wrapped it was very creative! I figure he's good for the next ten years. ;)

Tonight I went out with my sister to Stir Crazy. Yum! I had mai tais and stir fry shrimp. Actually, no, I had ONE mai tai and stir fry shrimp. Why only one? Because I would've fallen asleep in my bok choy had I had any more. How sad. My sister and I get a night out and we were both sitting there yawning. We did a little shopping and then decided it was time to go home. Yes, we're quite the life of the party.

Now to start working on the second round of edits on my book...

Sunday Sound Out

Do you answer EVERY question you get throughout the week? Or do you just pick out the good ones? - plainprecious
Nah, I'm an equal opportunity answerer. I try to answer the stupid ones too.

one more time on the address for the postcards, please! - denise
Actually, I have a new address. It's farther away, but it's a real street address. It's...
Dawn Meehan
836 S. Arlington Heights Rd.
Suite 230
Elk Grove Village, IL 60007

I've been looking at your map. You're not making any inroads into North Dakota, or Montana. Nevada is not a hot bed of love for your blog either. What are your plans for making some headway into those territories? - Rick
Do people actually live in those states?

Anyway, SSO question, is there anything else you "don't do?" Like, phobias or things you physically CANNOT get near? - Jenny
puke, styrofoam, balloons, pointy toed shoes, and math

So what are you going to do with all that loot (tax refund)?!?
I dunno. New couch, perhaps?

I have a question for you.. maybe for next Sunday? What about germs? Are you a freak about germs, or have you just given up over the years? - TheHMC
Let's see...
First kid - you boil and sterilize everything before using it. Kid drops something on the floor and you dive for it, snatching it up so you can quickly boil it again.

Second kid - you wash stuff with soap and hot water before using it. Kid drops something on the floor and you pick it up and wash it off.

Third kid - you rinse stuff off with water and some soap if it's available before using it. Kid drops something on the floor and you wipe it on your shirt to brush off the germs.

Sixth kid - you tear the package open in the car and give the toy/pacifier/office supplies/measuring cups to your child immediately to stop their crabbing. Kid drops it on the floor and you tell one of the older kids to pick it up, brush off the hairball and green slime that has attached itself to the item, and give it back to the baby.

What do you think?

I have a unrelated question for next Sunday. Do you ever buy your kids clothes from any thrift stores. It can be time consuming finding nice clean name brand ones but so worth it. - Kristine in Michigan
I was just talking to my friend Sue about this and we decided that we should really go check out the resale shops more often. If you're patient and persistant you can get great deals. I do buy stuff on sale and I LOVE hand-me-downs.

Oh, Dawn. So sorry to hear the kids are still sick. Definitely no fun for anyone. - m8price
Yeah, it isn't "fun" when they're sick, but still, in a way it's nice. In a "relaxing" sort of way....

Hey Dawn, Can you spare a square? - Sue
I don't have a square to spare. I can't spare a square.

Hi Dawn, I was wondering if people from all the places that your children are named after have sent cards for Autin's project? - anonymous
I have ones from Austin, Savannah, Clayton & Brooklyn, but I don't think I got any from Jackson, MS or Lexington, KY.

Thirdly (and finally), what grades do yo teach at Sunday School? - K
It's funny. When I volunteered to teach, I asked the Christian Ed. Director, "I'll teach again this year, but can I have an age group that my kids aren't in?"
She replied, "I don't think there is such a thing."
"Oh yeah. I guess I do have them in pretty much all age groups, don't I?"
Anyway, I teach 2nd & 3rd grade this year.

I have noticed in the past couple days though, whatever you added recently causes the windows to freeze up, scrolling freezes up, it's really hard on the computer. Scripts, java, or something? - La
Huh? Scripts? Speaking of - I have to memorize mine and soon! Java? I could go for a cup of coffee right about now...

Me again - I found my name on the map. And as I said on my postcard, there's something I'd like to share... We've been living in Dakar, Senegal (West Africa) for over a year, and I got involved in charity work. One particular programme really caught my attention and I posted about it on my blog. One of my readers was so touched about the story that she made a web page.
If your kids whine about their school... please show them these pictures! - Pat in Dakar

I know this is going to sound kinda strange....but I would really like to know where you purchased the t.p. holder in the picture. I really like it and really like that it's not the "spring-loaded dead rod". If, by chance, you remember where you got it, I would love to know. - Kristen
I got it at Target, but it doesn't work. They still don't replace the tp with it.

Sunday question: How often do you do grocery shopping and do you buy in bulk from Sam's or Costco?
I do a big shopping every 2 weeks and fill in with small stuff at least once a week. I never shop at Sam's or Costco. I used to shop at Aldi because groceries are really cheap there. No name brands, small store, no extra frills. I cut my grocery bill in half when I started shopping there. Now that we're doing the diet with no additives or preservatives, however, I have to shop at other places because Aldi just doesn't carry much of anything without additives. I shop at Meijer, Jewel, Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, and Peapod.
Also where on earth do you store all the food an toliet paper?
OK, don't hate me, but my pantry is insanely organized just because I used to sell Tupperware and I acquired enough containers to open my own store.



Hi Dawn, I wonder if anyone else does this...Squezze the roll so it won't roll around as fast? So the kids won't use as much paper. I remember my mother teaching me that trick. Kristine in Michigan.
You NEVER squeeze the roll!



its a bit of a mystery isnt it? They can change their underwear everyday but seem to have trouble changine ONE roll of toilet paper? - roseys madhouse
They change their underwear every day?!?!?!?! Lucky!

SSO potential question: Any advice for a mommy of a 19mo about to become a mommy of two in nine days (hopefully sooner)? - becky
Don't believe them when they say that drinking mineral oil will put you in labor. It won't. And it's not a pretty sight. Trust me on this.

Thanks, Dawn! I'm feeling much better about the two black Russians and handful of snack mix I had for dinner! Or maybe I'm feeling better just because I had two black Russians for dinner...
Sandy in Tucson
(P.S., Just so everyone knows, I don't have two black Russians for dinner every night. Once in a while a salad and some steamed asparagus do manage to creep into my diet...)
I don't always have 2 black Russians for dinner either. Sometimes I have 3.

Here's a question for your Sunday Sound Out - What ad program do you use? Do you get to choose the ads that go on your site or do the powers that be choose it for you? Deb in OPKS
BlogHer Ads. They choose, but I can refuse to run any of them on my blog if I don't like them. Honestly, I've never had the need to refuse any ads as they always choose nice, tasteful ones, in my opinion.

Hi Dawn, This is a question for Sunday SO. How many box's of cheese crackers..I mean..cereal do you go through in a week? Also how many gallons of milk? I can only imagine! - Kristine in Michigan.
We go through about a gallon of milk and a loaf of bread a day and maybe 2 boxes of cereal a week.

SSO question perhaps? How do you fix something for dinner that all 6 kids will eat? I have trouble enough with 4 kids. One doesn't like peas, the other doesn't like corn....blah, blah, blah. Drives me batty it does! Queen Elaine
I just give them all chocolate. It's the one thing they agree on.
OK, I make one thing for dinner and they can eat it or be hungry. The end. Actually, if it's a new recipe or something I know that they don't really like, I give them the option of making themselves a sandwich, but I don't cook a bunch of different things. No way.

You have stopped mentioning weight watchers... are you still trying to follow the plan? - MaBunny
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I suck. But I'm sure I'll start again on Monday. It's tradition after all.

First, where do you find "Sweet Coconut Chai Tea"? It sounds wonderful! - kimikki
It's just Celestial Seasonings. Mmmmm

Just wanted to ask what you wanted me to bring back for you while I'm in Cancun? Jenn loves Derek
Sunshine! 80 degree weather! Tequila?

Dawn, I'm glad the surgeries went well! I'm sorry to put this here, but I can't find a place to put it on your other site. Did you guys post winners for the wriskey and rock the vote contests (on Mamas Like)? I can't find them, or maybe it's just mommy brain:) anonymous
Yep, winners were chosen and announced on Mamaslike.

Eek you have to put height, weight and eye colour on your license?? - nutralady2001
Yeah, they're more fun that way.

Dawn, what is a class 'D'. Laura
the grade I got in math

Wow - what a rubbish experience. (I'm guessing being there for four and a half hours was a SLIGHT exaggeration?) Here in Britain the driving license used to be a bit of paper you had from age 17 to 80. Now it's a photo card and has to be renewed more often, but it's all done by post rather than creepy DMV office! Heather
Who? ME? Exaggerate? Never!
And your license is just paper? For real? What happens when it goes through the wash? I'm really curious because I wash my license, library card, debit card, and grocery store card on a regular basis. Apparently I haven't learned to empty out my pockets yet.

What are you doing to celebrate your birthday? Don't forget Daylight Savings is this weekend too. Hoffman Family
Let's see...I went over to my parents' house today (Sunday) for dinner and I'm going out tomorrow night with my sister. I'll update tomorrow on that because I only got 5hours of sleep last night thanks to daylight savings time and it's now 2:30 am Sunday night and I'm not even halfway finished with this post. I'M TIRED!

thank you very much for being a organ donor. Heaven know we need them here. - Brent
I can't see any reason to NOT be an organ donor. What do I need with a liver when I'm dead? It should go to someone who can use it.

That is a GREAT photo. And hasn't anyone explained to you that when it says "weight" it means "GOAL weight"? They just did not have room for the word goal in that spot. - Brenda
Well darn! NOW you tell me!

You are so pretty!! How do you keep from getting any wrinkles??? - anonymous
I iron my face daily. HA! Actually, it's just all the fat. If I lost weight, the wrinkles would show.

would you hate to know that arizona licenses don't expire for like 30 years? - Spider Lady
Somehow that scares me more than going to the DMV to renew every 4 years! Note to self: Stay off the streets in AZ.

By the way, what happened to your other earring?? - Donna
I figured, dork that I am, that I just forgot to put it on, but the next day, Savannah found it outside the front door of my house. I guess it fell out.

I almost always have sunglasses on my head. My mother is constantly griping for me to take them off when we have family gatherings because, god forbid, anyone should get a picture of me with sunglasses on my head!! *gasp* - TheHMC
My friend Gin, who is a hairdresser, says that she's going to invent a headband that works at well as sunglasses to hold your hair back. Nothing beats 'em!

Ahhh the Illinois DMV, what a joke! My best and quickest experiences with them have been in Morris, IL. You probably could have driven there and back in less than 4 1/2 hours. IMO, Morris is the closet to Mayberry you'll find near the Chicago area. - megryansmom
Hmmmm, are there any Sonics near there?

How many more years before you have to take a kid to get their license> Its tons of fun. - plainprecious
Well, Austin will be 16 in 2 1/2 years, but he's grounded until the end of time, so I guess I have until Savannah turns 16 (about 4 more years).

What do you REALLY want for your birthday...I mean, besides world peace? (Might as well have it WRITTEN here in black and white so there's NO "I didn't know what you wanted" EXCUSE from anyone!) - Nancy Binky
I wanted a birthday margarita, a birthday cookie, or a birthday tirimisu. I got all three!

Oh my gosh. I couldn't figure out what the "GRN eyes" was. Am I stupid or what? anonymous
Hey! Are you the girl on the commercial for Beauty and the Geek who says, "It's not that I'm stupid. I just don't know stuff."?

A Day at the DMV

Despite the fact that I was reminded to renew my driver's license twenty times while I was in Texas, I still procrastinated, put it off, forgot about it. My friends reminded me yet again the other day. Still, I didn't take care of it until today. Now I'm not sure how the DMV works in other states or countries, but I'll give you a short run-down of how it works here in Illinois.

I enter the Department of Motor Vehicles and walk up to the front desk where a grumpy person who hates his life glances up at me and says, "Why are you bothering me?" fine upstanding citizen greets me.
"Hi! I need to get my license renewed," I happily tell the gentleman.
Without a word or any semblance of human expression, he hands me a paper with a number on it and points to his right.
"Thank you!" I say as head in the direction he's pointing.

I arrive in a waiting area of sorts and take a seat. There are twenty happy state employees just waiting on pins and needles to help me. So naturally, I sat there for fifteen minutes until one of them decided to do some work, and called my number. I approached a woman who was much too busy talking to her coworker to bother looking up at me.

"You should go to this bar with me. They play country music there. Oooo! We could call you Lurlene! I never give out my real name when I meet people at a bar. If a guy asks me my name, I tell him Maria and hope that my friends don't come by and call me Emily in front of him. I think we should go to the country bar and we'll call you Lurlene. Isn't that hilarious?"
"Hee hee hee! I never use my real name either! And if someone asks me for my phone number, I always say 588-2300. (You may only get this if you live in Chicagoland, but it's the number for a carpet company and for like 500 years, they've sang that stupid phone number on their commercials. Everyone has that number etched in their brains.)
"Hee hee hee. That's funny Lurlene!

I mentally thank God that I'm married (even if it's to a man who makes Kool-Aid fish and paints the insides of closets) because I cannot imagine being on the single scene with folks like these. Seeing that they have no intention of ending their exchange of dating tips any time soon, I cleared my throat and asked, "Excuse me. Am I in the right place?"

Maria, Emily, Lurlene's friend, never looked up at me, but stuck out her hand in my general direction. Does she want money? A handshake? Maybe she's just putting some sort of Vulcan mind meld on me? (I've never seen Star Trek and have no idea what I'm talking about, so if you are one of those freaks people who are obsessed with all things Trekky, please don't feel the need to write and correct my terminology because I actually don't care. All I'm saying is that customer service is NOT their number one priority.)

Anyway, I plopped my old license in Lurlene's friend's outstretched hand. She looked at it, typed on her computer, and asked, "Is your address the same?"

"Yep."

"Is your height and weight the same?"

This is the part where I snorted a little. I replied sarcastically, "Yeah, I'm still 125 pounds." I laughed hysterically thinking that was pretty darn funny as it's quite clear that I haven't seen 125 since Jimmy Carter was in office. Apparently Lurlene's friend wasn't amused as she looked at me deadpan, and said, "So it's 125?"

"Umm no. It's ummm, well, it's kinda, umm," I stammered, not really wanting to tell her the truth.

She rolled her eyes, as if to say, "Look lady, it doesn't matter what your driver's license says, you're a cow and no number you give me is going to change that. Now hurry up because I have bar hopping plans to make."

I decided that lying was the best policy and told her to put 150. Ha! I only wish I was 150.

She pushed a paper at me and, yawning with boredom, told me to sign it and then take my old license to the cashier in yet another line.

I stood in the cashier's line and encountered yet another friendly, smiling face. I'm not positive, but I think she said, "That'll be $10 and you suck for taking up my time." I paid her and moved on to line number four.

This is where I had the vision test. I'm pretty sure I could be legally blind and still pass. "Look into the machine. Do you see any letters?"

"Yes. G, B, T..."

He cut me off, "You don't need to tell me what they are. Do you see flashing lights on the right, the left, or both sides?"

"The right."

"Good enough! Go over there to the update counter now."

OK then. I was able to bypass the written test line and the behind-the-wheel test line this time. I walked over to the update counter and stood in line there. Finally I was greeted by yet another fun, friendly, happy-to-be-alive DMV employee. I handed her my old license and paperwork. She directed me to take a seat in another waiting area. I waited there for my name to be called so I could get my picture taken.

The woman who called my name and took my picture actually smiled at me. I couldn't figure out how she ever managed to get a job there. I stood against the backdrop and smiled. After she took the picture (or so I thought), I relaxed my stance and made a goofy face at Savannah who was waiting for me. That's when she clicked the camera. She looked at the picture and said something along the lines of, "That's a terrible picture! You look like a serial killer. Stand back over there."

Now, I should have been ecstatic that she noticed it was a bad picture and let me have a "do-over", right? I mean, I'd hate to be caught speeding some day and have the police officer arrest me just because I look like a psychopath in my driver's license photo. But (and this is the really pathetic part) I thought to myself, "Oh bummer. If she made me keep the awful photo, that would make a pretty good blog post!" I know, I know. I warned you it was pathetic.

So I went to another waiting area until my new license was ready. It actually didn't turn out too badly. Well, except for the part where Savannah brought to my attention that I was only wearing one big, gold hoop earring and I had my sunglasses pushed up in my hair like a headband. I'm such a dork. But still, I was only at the DMV for 4 1/2 hours and I only had Savannah with me, and IL has pretty new licenses with red on them! So all in all it was good.

She Called!!!

Guess who called me today! Savannah's health teacher!!! I kid you not! I was at the hospital waiting for my kids to go back to surgery and my cell phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Meehan?"
"Yes."
"Hi. This is Mrs. M., Savannah's health teacher."

This is the part where I thought, well it's a good thing I'm in the hospital because I think I just went into cardiac arrest.

"Oh yes. Umm, about Savannah's menu... I really usually cook decent meals. Honestly. Other than those Cheez-Its I got Savannah and some flavored tea, I don't keep foods with artificial ingredients in the house. I make almost everything from scratch. Usually. Honestly. I know it seems like I'm a derelict and I only feed my kids Skittles, Dr. Pepper, and boxed, frozen nuggets made from 1% chicken parts and 99% sawdust, but I swear I only feed them that stuff on odd numbered days. The other days, I cook real meals containing actual food. I swear! The more I ramble, the more I notice the absolute silence on the other end. The more silence, the more I ramble. I'm just fun that way. I continued prattling, I mean, I don't make them eat liver or anything too gross, but I force feed them vegetables. Well, not Brussel sprouts because, well because they're icky and they look like little brains. I know I write about cookies a lot, but we really don't eat cookies for every meal. Well, sometimes I do, but I make sure the kids don't. Because I want to keep them all for myself care about the kids' nutritional needs."

Before her ears started bleeding, Mrs. M interrupted and said, "Mrs. Meehan, I was just calling to let you know that Savannah is a great kid."

I impressed her with my highly articulate reply, "Huh?"

"I was going to write you a note, but I decided to give you a call instead. I've paired the kids up to take notes and work together. Savannah's partner struggles a bit and Savannah has been really nice to her and has taken time to help her. I just wanted to let you know."

"Ohhh. Oh well, very good. Very well then. You can just ignore my inane ramblings."

Seriously though, I was so happy to hear that my daughter was being nice and helpful. It's always good to know that something has sunken in and the kids can behave in public. Sometimes I wonder if anything I say gets through to them, ya know? And how nice that her teacher took the time to call and let me know! And even better yet, she closed with this, "As far as the diet goes, believe me, I know what it's like to do the whole fast food drive-thru thing on the way to dropping my son off at his sporting event. I just want the kids to be aware of what they're eating and to think about the decisions they make when it comes to food. If they repeatedly make unhealthy choices, they'll end up looking like you it'll catch up to them eventually.

And the kids' surgery went very well today. They were in and out in no time. Clay was loopy and goofy as they took him back to surgery. He was giggling so hysterically that the nurse asked, "Did anesthesia come and give him a shot?" Um, nope. He's just a goofball. As always, having surgery done in a children's hospital sure makes you thankful for healthy kids. Say a prayer for all those kiddos who are in the hospital for more than a simple ear tube surgery.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edited to add the following:
I keep forgetting to mention this! If any fellow blogger out there in Blogland has a couple minutes to spare, go here and fill out this survey about mom bloggers. Bobbie Sue is trying to finish up her PhD and needs your help gathering information about how blogging might have helped you transition to motherhood. Please take a minute to help her out in her research.

So, What's For Dinner?

I looked over at Savannah who was writing something in a notebook. "Whatcha writing? Is that homework?"
"Yeah. We're supposed to write down everything we eat for the week."
"Ohhh. Is that for health class?"
"Yep."
"You're making up stuff, right?"
"Huh?" Savannah looked up at me, confused.
"You're not writing down what we have really eaten for dinner this week, are you?"
"Yes," she answered innocently.

Crap! Why did I ever teach my kids that lying is bad?! I obviously never thought that one through. I glanced at her paper. Listed almost every day for breakfast was "a handful of Cheez-Its". Yeah, that's nutritious. Nothing gets your day started like highly processed, fake cheese flavored crackers. Vitamins? Nope. Minerals? Nah. Fiber? Not really. Protein? Notsomuch. Partially hydrogenated soybean and cottonseed oil with TBHQ, yellow #5, yellow #6, and monosodium glutamate? Check!

I continued past Savannah's nutrition packed breakfasts to dinner. I've had a less than stellar week in the cooking department. Her list read...
nachos
chicken pot pie
double cheeseburger from McDonalds
grilled cheese sandwich
pizza
taquitos
lasagna

Oh yeah, that looks great. I envisioned Savannah's health teacher being so shocked and appalled by Savannah's menu that she'd soon be sending me a packet filled with 5 pounds of nutrition information including menus, charts of vitamins and minerals needed to support development, and a BMI calculator. I was sure she'd soon be calling me to discuss the importance of the food pyramid (which, by the way, did not exist when I was a kid. We didn't have any pyramid. We had the bread group. Cookies and cakes were part of this group. We had the dairy group. This included milkshakes. We had the fruit and veggie group which included French fries and strawberry-banana smoothies. And finally we had the meat group which contained cheeseburgers.).

"So you don't want to write baked salmon, steamed asparagus with a lemon drizzle, herbed new potatoes and a cup of fresh pineapple for dessert? OK. OK. It's ok. How about we just add some details then? It's not really lying if you're just adding details, right? Here we go..."

Nachos: made with low fat corn tortillas, fat free beans, low fat cheddar, tons of lettuce and tomatoes and NO greasy beef, sour cream or high fat cheese

Pizza: made with a whole wheat crust, fresh plum tomatoes and basil, and a sprinkle of part skim parmigiana cheese and NOT sausage and greasy pepperoni

Lasagna: made with whole grain pasta, lean ground turkey, ricotta, and spinach and NOT Italian sausage and 6 pounds of cheese

Double cheeseburger from McDonald's: made with, umm, made with, hmmm, ok, I got nothin' here.

Every time one of my kids has brought this particular project home from school, it's been a fast food/quick-what-can-I-throw-in-the-oven kind of week. Every time! Why don't teachers give us a head's up and let us know that every bite our kids eat is going to be analyzed so we have time to stock up on healthy foods that we never ordinarily keep in the house be prepared?!

Oh and I thought I had a most wonderful idea for curbing my late night sweet tooth attacks! My plan was to make myself a cup of wonderful, sweet dessert tea in the evening when I got a craving to munch on something sweet. So, tonight I put my plan in action. Mmmm Sweet Coconut Chai Tea with a little milk and sugar. It's like a dessert, right? I sat down and inhaled the spicy, coconutty aroma and felt the steam on my face. I took a sip of the rich, creamy goodness. And then I decided that the tea would go much better with a cookie. So much for that plan.

AGAIN?!

This is what I found today. Look familiar? LESS THAN 24 HOURS LATER, THE ROLL IS EMPTY AND JUST HANGING OUT WAITING FOR SOMEONE ME TO CHANGE IT! OK, I know we've had some diarrhea issues at this house lately, but come on! A whole roll in less than 24 hours?!

"Um kids, do you see how much toilet paper is left? Now, do you see the size of my butt? Do you see the problem here?"

The kids were still laughing about the fact that I'd said the side-splitting word "diarrhea" as they broke out in song.
"When you're sliding into first and your pants begin to burst,
diarrhea
diarrhea
When you're sliding into home and your pants begin to foam,
diarrhea
diarrhea
When you do a little dance and it's gooey in your pants,
diarrhea
diarrhea
When you don’t feel like a winner and your butt blows out your dinner,
diarrhea
diarrhea"

Yep, good times, good times here in the Meehan house.

It's Not Going to Change Itself

May I take a moment to pitch a fit? Of course I can. It's my blog!
This is what I found in the bathroom today. This was not the first time. In fact, I find this same scene at least once a week.


Who here can tell me what's wrong with this picture? Anyone? Anyone? My kids couldn't come up with the answer.


To illustrate my point, I took the cardboard tube from the holder and held it up for my kids to see a little more clearly. Still, they looked at me completely confused. "What?" they innocently asked. "What's wrong?"

"Ummm do you see how much toilet paper is left on here? Could you wipe your butt with this?"

They shuffled their feet and looked down and muttered that they could probably use that much to wipe.

"Not very convincing, guys. See, when the roll has less toilet paper than it would take to wipe a Barbie doll's butt, it's time to replace the roll. I know, I know, it sounds scary. It sounds hard. It sounds like a really technical job. But with a little practice, I'm sure you guys could do this. In fact, you may even become so proficient at it that you could go on to teach your dad how to do it!"
I continued, "All you have to do is reach a mere 2 feet over, grab a spare roll of toilet paper, and slide it on the spindle. Ta da! You kids don't know how easy you have it! When I was a kid, we had to completely remove the spindle and it was SPRING LOADED! We had to push the two ends in and hope to God that the spring didn't snap and launch the whole darn spindle across the bathroom! All you kids have to do is slide the empty roll off and slide the new roll on!"

OK, I'm done with my tirade. For the moment anyway.

A few of you guys wrote to say that you couldn't find your marker on the map and you were wondering if your package had gotten lost in the mail. We got your packages and you're actually on the map. When you click on the map to view it close-up, look to the left of the map where the list of everyone's city is. Scroll down to the bottom of that and you'll see that there are 2 pages. Click on page 2. Everyone who sent an inquiry yesterday is on there. I guess the map only holds so many on each page. Sorry about the confusion and thank you again for sending us all the information and pictures! :)

Oh, and for those asking for the address again, it's...
Dawn Meehan
PO Box 66274
Chicago, IL 60666

Oh and of course Jackson and Austin threw up this morning. You know - because I wrote that everyone was doing well last night. And my stomach feels as if I've taken a double dose of Alli. As long as Clay and Lexi stay healthy this week. On Thursday, Clay's having his second set of tubes put in his ears and Lexi's getting her third set. Their ears haven't been clear since October. The poor kids are constantly saying, "What?" and they both failed their hearing tests.

Sunday Sound Out

It's that time of the week again. Time for me to scroll through hundreds of comments and try to pick out all the questions from you, my loyal readers.

Let's see here - thank you again to all my readers who took the time to send us cards, letters, postcards, pictures, and information about your towns! We really do appreciate it! Here is an updated map. I'm caught up with all correspondence received up until last week.


View Larger Map

Thank you to everyone who has voted for my blog in one of more of the Blogger's Choice Awards. I guess the voting will continue throughout the year.

And now for your questions...

OK - I have to know how to do that glorious cheeseburger cake!!!!!! How are the layers done? - Gramma
The "buns" are yellow cakes and the "burgers" are chocolate cakes. I think I just used commercial chocolate frosting on the chocolate cakes and I used no icing on the yellow cakes. Then I put icing "lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, onions, and sesame seeds" on the cakes. Super fast and easy!

How is the play coming along? Are you finding it to be a good release/time off or is it another thing on your to-do list? Hey, your husband could video your scenes and then you could post it on your blog for all your readers. What do you think?? - Lisa, San Antonio, Texas
Eh, the play's going ok. A fellow cast member switched parts with me so I have a much smaller one now! Yay! Thank you Pam! Maybe now I'll be able to memorize my lines before opening night. And as far as putting my scenes on here...ummm, I think no. I was in Arsenic and Old Lace last year. My friend wanted to see the DVD of the play so I mailed it to her. She was only able to handle watching 5 minutes of it before she went blind.

Did you take the (cake decorating) class at Harper? COD? MCC? - Michelle
Yep - Harper!

Here's a question for you: when you delegate to the kids, do you go fix what they've done afterwards? - Raising Country Kids
Hmmm, it depends how insane busy I am on that day.

Now, along with all the other things you need to accomplish, how's that Dr appt coming along? - Kathy
I'll have you know that I called to make an appointment and was told, "The doctor doesn't have any openings for new patients until June."
"That's fine. That fits right in with my procrastinating. Can I schedule the appointment for June then?"
"No. You'll have to call back at the end of March to set up the appointment."
Wanna take bets on whether I'll remember to call at the end of March?
Then I called my OB to set up that appointment and was told that they could see me right away in April.

I used to wait tables as well, and have similar dreams frequently. Except that instead of missing my tie, I'm missing all upper body clothing. And no one notices. - Janet
Uh yeah, if that was me, people would notice. "Excuse me Miss? Could you please lift your boob out of my soup?"

Question for your SSO: With 6 kids, how do you handle daily chores? Do your kids work off a chore chart? Do they get paid for doing those chores?
Lisa in San Antonio
I usually just scream at them to do something and then I break down and do it myself.

Just one question, how many lists do you have? I have a daily list, a meal plan for the week list, a grocery list, a wish list, and a finish that project list! Allisha
Oh man! I've never thought about it before! Oh great! Now I'm going to have to make a list of my lists so I know how many there are!

Maybe a question for your Sunday Sound out thingie... when did each of your kids start walking/crawling? - anonymous
They didn't walk. They ran. And before they were a year old. I remember back to when Austin was a baby. I'd walk with him, holding his hands, trying to teach him to balance and walk on his own. By the time the third came around, I knew that walking was highly overrated and every time Jackson would start to stand up, I'd just kick him back down. It didn't work though.

Didn't you know that the more kids you have, the more puke you have to deal with? - anonymous
NOOO! No one told me that! That's not something you read about in those parenting books - the more kids you have, the more puke there will be to clean up.

ELDERBERRY Extract~!! it's an immune booster that helps short-circuit the flu or help those around it not get it. - Kate
And it can put lonely old men out of their misery if you mix is with cyanide, strychnine, and arsenic.

A question for your Sunday Sound-out: You mentioned in a previous post that you can't go to bed knowing you have e-mail in your inbox. Were you checking your blog comments while you were sick, or are you past all the excitement of thousands of e-mails a day? - Stephanie
Ugh, I've given up on that. At any given time, I'm a week or more behind on my email.

Oh Dawn! The things we'll do for our kids! I hope you all feel better SOON. I'll keep you in my prayers. And I hope Brooklyn is still speaking to Clay. LOL - Karla
She's speaking to him, but she calls him, "ClayPunk".

Also: What kind of camera do you use that takes such great pictures? (especially at night of the eclipse) - anonymous
I have a Sony Cyber Shot with a 12X optical zoom. I got the display model for 50% off too! Score!

Today Dawn you can be an honorary Brit and have an extra 'Mother's Day'. Today (Sunday) is Mother's Day here in the UK - and let's face it with so many kids you deserve an extra one!!!! - Gail
Woo Hoo! I never knew that other countries celebrated Mother's Day. It's interesting that it's on a different day too. Learn something every day!

Why exactly DID Joe paint the closets? To brighten them up so you could see inside better? That's the only thing I could come up with. - Robin
Because he's Joe.

Are you still in touch w/Mimi??? - anonymous
Of course! We email a couple times a week and I read her updates whenever she posts them. I loved her update from a couple days ago, in fact. It gave me goosebumps....

We left ,picked up Dana and went to have lunch . Then T. wanted to go to Julian's grave site , step I hadnt taken yet.
It was strange , I didnt let myself think too much as William was with us, therefore didnt let myself feel much...
Since most of you cant be here and visit Julian here you are ...


I didn't let emotions take over that is until emotions didn't give me a choice...
As we were walking out , William pointed at something and wanted to run after it . We looked and there was a yellow butterfly . WOW !!
Then a second one fluttered around .As we kept walking towards the gate , we saw more and more yellow butterflies .It gave us goosebumps all over... We must have seen a dozen ... We thanked Julian for his gift , and walked to the car still in a happy daze... As we approached the car ,outside of the gates , we looked for butterflies everywhere, but NOOO, we couldn't see any. William turned around and pointed to the otherside of the gate " Butterflies in there" ....
It was amazing and heartwarming...

I just put a new toilet seat on and installed a new spayer for my kitchen sink. - Kristine in MI
OK I know this was just a typo, but it cracked me up anyway. Now you can wash your hands and have your cat fixed in the kitchen sink at the same time!

So Dawn, when you are planning an event at your house, do all the kids chip in the help out? - Korkie
You bet your butt! They were awesome with this last party. Austin and Savannah did a ton of stuff to help me!

Hubby just found a dead mouse behind our fridge.... my question is what do you do to get rid of the decaying dead mouse smell once you have gotten rid of it. I can still my the lingering wafts of decayed meat. - Korkie
Just have the kids throw up in the house. That'll cover up any other smells.

I was surprised to see how many other people "don't do barf". One time, one of the boys threw up on the carpet in their room. After my husband cleaned and cleaned and extracted it, it still smelled so I cut the whole patch of carpet out and tossed it. We went with a big square of bare floor there for years. If it was up to me, we'd move to another house every time someone threw up.
I also do anything in my power to avoid getting sick myself. A couple years ago, we had friends over for New Year's Eve. My friend had some stomach virus and was feeling kinda oogy. She said, "I think I'd feel better if I could just throw up." OK, she might as well have said, "I think I'd feel better if I chewed my foot off." Ewww! So after a while, she went to the bathroom, threw up, and came out saying, "I feel much better. What's for dessert?" Oh my gosh! If I'd thrown up at someone's house like that, I would've curled up in a little ball, and stayed in her bathroom crying for the rest of the night.

I was also surprised how many of you are neurotic crazy curious about the idiosyncrasies of cartoons. They're CARTOONS people! Not reality. It's ok if Donald Duck doesn't wear pants and yet wraps a towel around his waist when he gets out of the tub. He's an ANIMATED DRAWING OF A DUCK! It's ok if Max & Ruby's parents aren't in the cartoon. It's a PRETEND SHOW ABOUT BUNNIES! Deep breaths. In, out. In, out. It's ok.

Thanks for the Little Things

A couple days ago, Joe decided that the inside of a couple closets needed to be painted. Immediately. So, he emptied out these closets and painted the insides of them. Well, why not? Makes perfect sense to me. I looked around the house at all the half-finished jobs and things that really needed to be fixed. I saw chipping paint, a bathroom that was primed last year, but still hadn't been painted, a gaping hole in the threshold of the back door, a couple holes in walls, etc. I bit my tongue and realized that once again, I have no idea how the male brain works. I don't understand my husband. I don't pretend to understand him on any level. How could he look around at the house and somehow miss all the obvious things that needed repair and yet feel an overwhelming compulsion to paint the inside of a closet? How?

Getting ready for the kids' birthday party last week, Joe came home from work about 20 minutes before we had to leave and said, "What can I do to help? What needs to be done?" Now, I know he was trying to be helpful, but I was on a mission to finish Brooklyn's cake, get everything together, and hop in the shower. I knew what I needed to do and I just didn't have the time to stop and give him directions. That's how I work. It drives me batty when I have to give him instructions like one of the kids. Why doesn't he just know this stuff? Seriously, why do I have to tell him everything?

On the flip side, Joe probably thought, "What is her problem?! Why is she stomping around, looking all ticked off when I'm standing here, asking her what I can do to help? What, does she think I can read minds? All she has to do is tell me what she wants and I'll do it. I don't automatically know what her plan is."

I'm pretty sure that men and women are different species.

After the birthday party, this escalated into a full blown argument. "I did everything for this party. Everything! I booked the party place, I bought the decorations. I sent out the invitations. I ordered the food and made the cakes and bought the presents. And you don't appreciate it! You can't ever acknowledge what I do and say thank you!"

"Why should I thank you? It's just a birthday party. Do you thank me for going to work every day? Do you thank me for dumping the garbage? Do you say thanks when I change the oil in your car?"

Boy, it's easy to start taking each other for granted, isn't it? It's easy to get in the habit of thinking, why should I thank you? It's your job.
Even though the little tasks we do: doing laundry, taking out the trash, grocery shopping, making doctor's appointments for the kids, paying bills, car maintenance, etc., might be our "jobs", it doesn't hurt to acknowledge them.

And ladies, we all know our husbands aren't going to suddenly start coming home, saying things like, "Wow, that's one sparkly toilet! Good job, cleaning!" or "I really appreciate that you helped the kids with their homework tonight." But, I bet if we started telling our husbands, "Hey thanks for taking out the garbage", or "thanks for giving the kids baths tonight", they might just pick up on it and reciprocate. That's my theory anyway. And wouldn't it be better if you both hear those little "thank yous" now and then? And wouldn't it be better if you were both happy and felt good about yourselves and each other?

So thank you for changing the oil in my car and getting me iced coconut coffee today, Joe! And I love the inside of the closets! I don't know how we went so long without painting them! ;)

What on Earth IS Uniqua?

Thank you all for your well wishes and prayers! You guys are so great! You know how you're always thanking me for making you laugh or making you feel better? Well, it works the other way around too! You guys always make me feel so much better! :) We're all on the mend here. No more fevers and no one has thrown up since (knocking REALLY hard on wood) two nights ago. Last night I dreamt that I was pregnant. I must have been delirious with fever. Savannah came home from school today with a project for her health class. She's to keep track of all the bad words (stupid, idiot, shut up, buttmunch) she hears this weekend. After being home for all of two hours, her notebook was full. I'm so proud.

Because Austin was puking and fevery yesterday, he stayed home from school today. So Austin lay there on the couch watching cartoons with his little brother and sister. Austin is the kind of kid who cannot watch cartoons without pointing out all the little idiosyncrasies he sees.

"Why doesn't Little Bear wear clothes? His parents wear clothes. Why does he run around naked all day?"

"Austin, it's a show about talking animals. A little girls hangs out in the forest with an assortment of talking wildlife and that's ok, but the fact that Little Bear doesn't wear clothes bothers you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How can Spongebob go to the beach when he's already under water?"

"So the whole talking sponge, starfish, crab, and squid are ok? A squirrel who somehow built a dome under water and lives in the ocean is ok, but the fact that Spongebob goes to the beach under water is absurd?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Where are Max and Ruby's parents? Why aren't they ever on the show?"

"For real? The whole 'talking bunnies who can take a bus to the store by themselves' is fine and dandy, but the fact that their parents are never shown is troubling to you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What on earth is Uniqua?!?!?!"

"OK. ya got me there. I have no idea what she's supposed to be! What on earth IS Uniqua?!"

For more laughs, read:
Into the Tunnel of Darkness: My Colonoscopy

Adventures in Grocery Shopping

How I Stopped the Cockroach that Nearly Ate my Face Off