23 of the Most Bodacious Retro Home Decor Items You Need! All Under $35

One of my favorite pastimes is putting a wide array of random items in my Amazon shopping cart knowing full well I will never actually purchase any of them window shopping. 

Feeling nostalgic the other day, I searched for some retro decorations, and as usual, Amazon did not disappoint. Here, in no particular order, are 23 totally gnarly items that will make you yearn for the 80s! 

(This is not a sponsored post. It's just me wasting time while taking a break from filling out job applications. I did not order, nor did I receive any of these products for review. Each item has at least 4 stars and is under $35.)

1.  Retro Record Album Drink Coasters  $11.99

Made from vinyl and crafted to look like real records, these drink coasters are sure to be a conversation starter! The set of 6 coasters are kept neatly in place by the holder that looks just like a vintage record player.

2.  Cassette Tape Earrings  $8.99

Small and lightweight, these cassette tape earrings are sure to turn heads! Made from acrylic, complete with stainless steel French hooks.

3.  Retro Bluetooth Speaker  $16.99

This tiny speaker packs some serious sound. Bluetooth enabled, you can easily connect your device. It's the bombdiggity! Plus, it looks so cute!

4.  Typewriter Pencil Holder  $19.99

When I tell students that I learned how to type on an actual typewriter (and if I made a mistake, I had to use Wite-Out) they can't believe it. This little resin typewriter pen holder is a most triumphant addition to your desk!

5.  Blockbuster ID Badge Holder  $12.95

Who doesn't remember heading to Blockbuster Friday night to grab your weekend movies? This Blockbuster logo lanyard has a plastic holder for your ID, a hook for keys, and a breakaway closure on the strap. I'm pretty sure I need this badge holder for my new ID because it's just so totally awesome!

6.  Record Album Area Rug  $28.89

This 3 foot area rug looks just like an LP (that's long playing vinyl record for the youngsters.) Made from polyester and memory foam with a non-slip rubber backing, this is a schweet accent for any room! 

7.  Nostalgic Drive-In Theater Sign  $11.99

I remember packing our bright orange Pinto station wagon with pillows and blankets and hitting the drive-in theater. Ahhh, the good ole days! This 8x12 metal sign brings the magic of the drive-in into your home. Time to hit the kitchen for a snack!

8.  Vintage Cassette Tape Light switch Plate  $8.99

Give any room in the house a little retro flair with this cassette tape light switch plate. It's available in several colors with different music genres marked on the front like any good mixed tape!

9.  VHS Tape Notebook  $7.99

This 6x9 inch notebook contains 100 lined pages and totally looks like the case of a blank VHS tape! For those of us who still like to take notes the old fashioned way - on paper, this is a must-have!

10.  Library Card Zippered Pouches  $9.99

These library due date cards are actually a set of six 9x6 inch fabric pouches. These are just the right size for cosmetics, feminine products, or pens/pencils. If you had a mom who would give you half a stick of Juicy Fruit gum covered in purse lint and tasting like the bottle of perfume sitting next to it, you may want to use the pouch for gum or candy.

11.  NES Cartridge Coasters  $13.99

Bring back memories with these NES drink coasters! Made from engineered wood and paper, they look just like the game cartridges. Coasters feature Donkey Kong, Super Mario, Legend of Zelda and others. Thank you Mario, but our Princess is in another castle!

12.  Cassette Tape Playing Cards  $11.99

You can always use a deck of playing cards because of the phenomenon that causes at least 2 cards to go missing every time you grab a deck to play. My theory is that the ace of  spades and the 2 of diamonds are with the stray socks that also go missing on a regular basis. These water-resistant,  coated cards have a vintage distressed look that reminds one of that mixed tape they made their boyfriend decades ago.

13.  Cassette Tape Dispenser/Desk Organizer  $11.90

Think how handy this would have been back in the day! Your pencil would have been right there to wind your tape back up when it was pulled loose! This cute desk organizer looks like an old cassette tape and holds Scotch tape, pens/pencils, and other small items. An organized desk is a happy desk, and a retro-looking desk is the happiest of all!

14.  Rubik's Cube Handbag  $20.99

This fantabulous purse looks like a Rubik's Cube and features a removeable shoulder strap for carrying. It's a 6" cube so it's perfect to hold a few small items like a phone, lipgloss, and keys. What a totally radical conversation piece!

15.  Floppy Disc Coasters  $9.94

This realistic-looking set of 6 silicone, dishwasher-safe floppy discs are actually drink coasters! They're also customizable and feature space to write your own messages! Fire up that Macintosh

16.  Cassette Tape iPhone Case  $24.99

This cassette tape is actually a phone case compatible with several iPhone models. Protect your phone with this totally bodacious and durable case! And that's not all, it's customizable! Add your own unique text to the case.

17.  TV Guide Crossword Puzzle Book  $13.79

Back in the day, you couldn't stream whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted. You had to wait until it aired on TV, and we all used the TV Guide to figure out what was playing when and where. This is an excellent nostalgic gift for the crossword puzzle lover in your life. There are over 250 puzzles to keep one entertained for a long time.

18.  Card Catalogue Organizer  $30.97

Amazon calls this an apothecary cabinet which I suppose it is, but it's also reminiscent of a card catalogue. I just love the retro look of it no matter what you call it. Use these 9 drawers for tea, make-up, office supplies, or the overwhelming abundance of little stuffed mice toys that some households with cats seem to have. Ahem. 

19.  Oregon Trail Coffee Mug  $14.96

The best part off 7th grade was when you got to go to the library and play Oregon Trail! Well, until you died of dysentery, that is. Enjoy your coffee in this mug that reminds you of the hardships of the Oregon Trail (complete with image of the amazing graphics from the game.)

20.  Floppy Disc Sticky Notes  $9.99

If you're anything like me, you need reminders for everything. I'm a big fan of sticky notes and how excellent (said in my best Bill & Ted's voice) are these? This 3-pack of floppy disc-looking sticky notes contain 50 sheets per pack. Now where did I put that sticky note with my Amazon password so I can order these?

21.  Cassette Tape Zippered Wallet  $29.99

This tape cassette wallet comes in an actual tape case! Too awesome! It also comes in a variety of colors as well. It's just the right size to hold your credit cards, cash & coins. Made from recycle cassette tapes and vegan leather, who wouldn't love this? 

22.  Library Due Date Card Notebooks  $14.99

This is a set of 10 notebooks that look like vintage library due date cards with realistic stamps and an aged discoloration. Each notebook is approximately 5.5' x 8.3" and contains 60 sheets of lined paper. Throw one in your purse, your car, your kitchen junk drawer, your nightstand, wherever you might need to jot something down.

23.  Pac Man Lamp  $34.96

This LED Pac Man lamp can be used with an included USB cord or batteries, and it functions in different modes including "party mode" wherein it reacts in time to music. Eat the dots, escape the ghosts, and use this totally tubular night light for any room in your home!

How to Walk Like a Middle-Schooler. Or a Monkey. Same Thing.

It's testing season here in Florida which means students have to spend many days following a block schedule and staying in the same classroom for hours on end. After the students complete the test, they need to remain seated and silent so as not to disturb anyone else who may still be testing. The only respite from the suffocating boredom is going to the bathroom. I mean, they rarely actually need to use the facilities. I've written about that HERE. But they like to "go to the bathroom" as in leave the classroom on an adventure that has nothing to do with "Number 1 or Number 2."

Yesterday, while administering a test, a student asks to go to the bathroom. Much like seeing someone yawn, this sets off a domino effect wherein a never-ending line of students await their turn for the bathroom. 

I stand by the classroom door waiting for a student’s return before allowing another to “go to the bathroom.” As I watch, the kid comes down the hallway, his arms flailing wildly above his head while he does some sort of walk that makes him look like a marionette being controlled by a drunken monkey. As he gets closer, I see he has the clear plastic wrapper from a fruit roll-up plastered across his face. This inspired me to mentally record the interesting and creative ways middle school students ambulate.

Another student walks up and asks, "Can I get nature's perfect hydration?" Being fluent in middleschool-ese, I understand he wants to go get a drink of water. This kid skips to the water fountain and back.

The next student who returns from the bathroom is making a face that looks like a cross between Mr. Bean and a naked mole rat. Why, you ask? Because he's 12.

The following student to leave the classroom has pulled her arms inside her sweatshirt and is sort of swinging the empty arms of the shirt up and around her head like one of those inflatable noodle things you see outside car dealerships.

Then a student goes to the bathroom and upon her return, she's looking through her hands as if they're binoculars. Sometimes it's hard to find your way back to your classroom; maybe this helps her. 

The next student engages in the most common middle-school walk, slowly scuffing their feet along. I don’t know if it’s the popularity of slides and Crocs, or if earth’s gravity has changed in such a way that it simply takes too much effort to actually lift one’s foot, but kids today cannot seem to pick up their feet when they walk.

This is followed by the famous, Jump and Try to Smack the Exit Sign" maneuver wherein a 4 1/2 foot kid proves that not everyone can dunk like Jordan.

Speaking of Jordan, the next student leaves the bathroom, spins around and does a lay-up with a wad of toilet paper while shouting, "Kobe!"

A while later, a student returns from the bathroom with his eyeglasses on upside down. I shudder to think what kind of harrowing experience he had in the bathroom to return so disheveled.

Next, a kid who has been hitting himself in the ear for unknown reasons (I make a note to check in with him later to make sure he isn't hearing voices or anything) asks if he can go to the bathroom because he thinks his ear is swollen, and I have so many questions. Do you not know that repeatedly boxing your ear may make it swollen? How is draining fluid from your bladder going to make the swelling in your ear go down? I'm genuinely confused.

I let another boy go to the bathroom. On the way out the door, I thought I heard him say, "I need to put water on my head." That can't be what he said, right? He returned 2 minutes later with his head dripping wet. 

"Did you go swimming in the toilet?" I asked dumbfounded.

"No, I put water on my head."

"Why?" I ventured because apparently I like to ask stupid questions.

"Because my head was dry," came his matter-of-fact response.

Okay then.

Finally a girl is doing some sort of dance as she reenters the classroom. Maybe she thinks there's a hidden camera recording her Tik Tok moves.

Maybe next week someone will do parkour off the walls as they sojourn in the mystical bathroom. Or perhaps someone will channel The Bangles and walk like an Egyptian. The possibilities are endless with these kids.