She Called!!!

Guess who called me today! Savannah's health teacher!!! I kid you not! I was at the hospital waiting for my kids to go back to surgery and my cell phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Meehan?"
"Yes."
"Hi. This is Mrs. M., Savannah's health teacher."

This is the part where I thought, well it's a good thing I'm in the hospital because I think I just went into cardiac arrest.

"Oh yes. Umm, about Savannah's menu... I really usually cook decent meals. Honestly. Other than those Cheez-Its I got Savannah and some flavored tea, I don't keep foods with artificial ingredients in the house. I make almost everything from scratch. Usually. Honestly. I know it seems like I'm a derelict and I only feed my kids Skittles, Dr. Pepper, and boxed, frozen nuggets made from 1% chicken parts and 99% sawdust, but I swear I only feed them that stuff on odd numbered days. The other days, I cook real meals containing actual food. I swear! The more I ramble, the more I notice the absolute silence on the other end. The more silence, the more I ramble. I'm just fun that way. I continued prattling, I mean, I don't make them eat liver or anything too gross, but I force feed them vegetables. Well, not Brussel sprouts because, well because they're icky and they look like little brains. I know I write about cookies a lot, but we really don't eat cookies for every meal. Well, sometimes I do, but I make sure the kids don't. Because I want to keep them all for myself care about the kids' nutritional needs."

Before her ears started bleeding, Mrs. M interrupted and said, "Mrs. Meehan, I was just calling to let you know that Savannah is a great kid."

I impressed her with my highly articulate reply, "Huh?"

"I was going to write you a note, but I decided to give you a call instead. I've paired the kids up to take notes and work together. Savannah's partner struggles a bit and Savannah has been really nice to her and has taken time to help her. I just wanted to let you know."

"Ohhh. Oh well, very good. Very well then. You can just ignore my inane ramblings."

Seriously though, I was so happy to hear that my daughter was being nice and helpful. It's always good to know that something has sunken in and the kids can behave in public. Sometimes I wonder if anything I say gets through to them, ya know? And how nice that her teacher took the time to call and let me know! And even better yet, she closed with this, "As far as the diet goes, believe me, I know what it's like to do the whole fast food drive-thru thing on the way to dropping my son off at his sporting event. I just want the kids to be aware of what they're eating and to think about the decisions they make when it comes to food. If they repeatedly make unhealthy choices, they'll end up looking like you it'll catch up to them eventually.

And the kids' surgery went very well today. They were in and out in no time. Clay was loopy and goofy as they took him back to surgery. He was giggling so hysterically that the nurse asked, "Did anesthesia come and give him a shot?" Um, nope. He's just a goofball. As always, having surgery done in a children's hospital sure makes you thankful for healthy kids. Say a prayer for all those kiddos who are in the hospital for more than a simple ear tube surgery.

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Edited to add the following:
I keep forgetting to mention this! If any fellow blogger out there in Blogland has a couple minutes to spare, go here and fill out this survey about mom bloggers. Bobbie Sue is trying to finish up her PhD and needs your help gathering information about how blogging might have helped you transition to motherhood. Please take a minute to help her out in her research.

So, What's For Dinner?

I looked over at Savannah who was writing something in a notebook. "Whatcha writing? Is that homework?"
"Yeah. We're supposed to write down everything we eat for the week."
"Ohhh. Is that for health class?"
"Yep."
"You're making up stuff, right?"
"Huh?" Savannah looked up at me, confused.
"You're not writing down what we have really eaten for dinner this week, are you?"
"Yes," she answered innocently.

Crap! Why did I ever teach my kids that lying is bad?! I obviously never thought that one through. I glanced at her paper. Listed almost every day for breakfast was "a handful of Cheez-Its". Yeah, that's nutritious. Nothing gets your day started like highly processed, fake cheese flavored crackers. Vitamins? Nope. Minerals? Nah. Fiber? Not really. Protein? Notsomuch. Partially hydrogenated soybean and cottonseed oil with TBHQ, yellow #5, yellow #6, and monosodium glutamate? Check!

I continued past Savannah's nutrition packed breakfasts to dinner. I've had a less than stellar week in the cooking department. Her list read...
nachos
chicken pot pie
double cheeseburger from McDonalds
grilled cheese sandwich
pizza
taquitos
lasagna

Oh yeah, that looks great. I envisioned Savannah's health teacher being so shocked and appalled by Savannah's menu that she'd soon be sending me a packet filled with 5 pounds of nutrition information including menus, charts of vitamins and minerals needed to support development, and a BMI calculator. I was sure she'd soon be calling me to discuss the importance of the food pyramid (which, by the way, did not exist when I was a kid. We didn't have any pyramid. We had the bread group. Cookies and cakes were part of this group. We had the dairy group. This included milkshakes. We had the fruit and veggie group which included French fries and strawberry-banana smoothies. And finally we had the meat group which contained cheeseburgers.).

"So you don't want to write baked salmon, steamed asparagus with a lemon drizzle, herbed new potatoes and a cup of fresh pineapple for dessert? OK. OK. It's ok. How about we just add some details then? It's not really lying if you're just adding details, right? Here we go..."

Nachos: made with low fat corn tortillas, fat free beans, low fat cheddar, tons of lettuce and tomatoes and NO greasy beef, sour cream or high fat cheese

Pizza: made with a whole wheat crust, fresh plum tomatoes and basil, and a sprinkle of part skim parmigiana cheese and NOT sausage and greasy pepperoni

Lasagna: made with whole grain pasta, lean ground turkey, ricotta, and spinach and NOT Italian sausage and 6 pounds of cheese

Double cheeseburger from McDonald's: made with, umm, made with, hmmm, ok, I got nothin' here.

Every time one of my kids has brought this particular project home from school, it's been a fast food/quick-what-can-I-throw-in-the-oven kind of week. Every time! Why don't teachers give us a head's up and let us know that every bite our kids eat is going to be analyzed so we have time to stock up on healthy foods that we never ordinarily keep in the house be prepared?!

Oh and I thought I had a most wonderful idea for curbing my late night sweet tooth attacks! My plan was to make myself a cup of wonderful, sweet dessert tea in the evening when I got a craving to munch on something sweet. So, tonight I put my plan in action. Mmmm Sweet Coconut Chai Tea with a little milk and sugar. It's like a dessert, right? I sat down and inhaled the spicy, coconutty aroma and felt the steam on my face. I took a sip of the rich, creamy goodness. And then I decided that the tea would go much better with a cookie. So much for that plan.

You Just Never Know When You Might Need Green Ric Rac

My 6 year old was assigned a family project to do this past week. Of course, being the highly ambitious family we are, we waited until the day before it was due to begin. Lex was given the outline of a snowman on card stock and, as a family, we were supposed to use anything but crayons and markers to decorate it. So, my kids dragged out my many boxes of craft supplies that are neatly stowed away in the attic.

Lex found some paint and immediately slapped a dozen colors on the snowman, smearing them around, covering every inch of his body. I looked at the brownish explosion of pain covering the snowman, and not wanting to squash Lexi's creativity, said, "What are you doing?! Do you really want it all BROWN like that? Does that look like a snowman? Don't you want some help? Can I help you with that Vicki? Please?"

This made me think back to when my mom wouldn't let me help her put tinsel on the Christmas tree. You see, she's insane a perfectionist. She passed this trait down to my sister. I, on the other hand, got the 'Eh, I'll slap it together and call it done' gene. I tried to hang tinsel the "right way". I really did. I started off carefully draping no more than two strands of the silvery stuff over the branch. I made sure each end of the tinsel hung equally on either side of the branch. I started doing this. But this method is boring. It takes too long. So before long, I would take fistfuls of tinsel and loft them up into the tree. Wads of silver strings stuck in clumps between the branches. My mom and sister would stop what they were doing and openly gasp, staring in shock, at me. My method was completely unacceptable to the perfectionist in them and I was fired from my post every year.

I tried really hard to help Lexi with her project without completely taking over. There's a fine line to walk in situations like this. "Should we make a dress or pants? Do you want to use pink fabric or blue? Do you want beads, gems, or buttons for eyes?" Give them choices and let them create, I say.

As they went through my numerous containers filled with crap stuff I'm never going to use, I came to the conclusion that I have a problem finishing what I start. Seriously, I have this huge container of fabric. I don't sew. I don't own a sewing machine. I've never learned how to sew. In fact, I'm not sure I could handle reattaching a button. So why is it that I have 287 pounds of fabric? Because you never know - some day I might just learn. Yes, I know. I have a problem. One day, they'll find me buried in my house among a trillion boxes of miscellaneous stuff, half a dozen cats eating Cap'N'Crunch because I haven't been able to find the cat food for days, another half dozen cats stuck in boxes of macrame supplies ordered from eBay because who knows? - one day I might go back to the 70s and learn how to make some groovy wall decorations.

Actually since joining a twelve step program, I've made some progress. I'm letting go of some of the things I've collected for projects I haven't even started. You might recall seeing some of my eBay auctions for unused sewing patterns...

"I bought this pattern at a fabric store thinking that I’d make my girls cute outfits to wear. However, because my sewing skills, much to my mother’s chagrin, consist of hot glue and duct tape, the pattern sits here untouched. My plans of learning how to sew have been replaced by plans of selling this pattern in an attempt to get some of my money back. If you do indeed know how to sew, I’m sure you could make absolutely adorable outfits with this pattern. This pattern is not cut. In fact, I’ve not even opened the envelope and taken the pattern out. If you, unlike me, know how to turn an envelope full of sheets of tissue paper with black markings on them, into a dress, then this item is for you! In fact, if you’re really good at sewing, you could make a few outfits, come up with your own exclusive label, open an eBay store, and sell them for many times the cost of the fabric. I would certainly much prefer to buy the finished product online as opposed to figuring out how to make it myself. Anyway, you’re bidding on this brand new, never opened pattern. Regular USPS shipping on this item if FREE! If you want it mailed Priority, I will be happy to do that at your expense - just email me with instructions. Insurance is optional, but once I drop the package at the post office, it is no longer my responsibility. For example, if my son decides to pour a bottle of glue into the envelope, or my daughter spills a glass of juice on the pattern, that’s my responsibility and I will fully refund your money. If, however, I take the envelope to the post office and a disgruntled mail carrier sets fire to it, a pack of wild dogs rip into it, or a mail sorting machine shreds it, it’s out of my hands, so you may want to add insurance. I will leave feedback for you as soon as I’ve received your payment. This comes from a smoke-free, pet-free home. Please ask me any questions before placing your bid. Happy bidding! :)

Bin of fabric for no apparent purpose

Bag full of yarn and half-finished crochet projects

Almost finished cross stitch project. I started this almost 14 years ago. I should finish it any day now.

.

A bunch of stuff you just never know if you'll need.

More important stuff

And yet more stuff. You just never know when you're going to need pom poms, embroidery floss, beads, and green ric rac.

LOL! The product of my brief stint with jewelry making. I have a couple dozen of these. Shhhh, don't tell my family - this is what they're getting for Christmas. Maybe wrapped in tinsel. ;)

Viewer Mail

I've got the best readers in the world! I want to take a minute to thank everyone for your nice comments to Julian's family and thank you to those who have sent them cards and/or made donations to Make-A-Wish Foundation in Julian's honor.
And thank you for everyone who has sent us a card or letter from your town. Wow - we've gotten about 160 now! We appreciate all the time you've taken to look up information about your towns, and we are loving all the pictures of your landmarks and families! Besides the U.S, we've now gotten letters from England, Canada, New Zealand, Japan, Guam, Puerto Rico, Germany, France, Ireland, Scotland, Netherlands, and Sweden! Thank you so much for taking the time to send this information to us! I wish I had the time to share all of these with you because they're very cool! Here are a couple pictures though...



Here's the mail. It never fails. It makes me want to wag my tail. When it comes, I want to wail, "MAAAAIIIILLLL!" (Sorry, I just had a Blue's Clues moment. I know, I know, it's sad. But on the bright side, I wasn't singing, "There's a party in my tummy, so yummy, so yummy!")



This isn't even all the postcards. There were several postcards and other pictures included with the letters.



Check out this postcard! It's from a reader named Shirley. Both sides of this card are printed on fabric and it's edged with thread. How cool! Do you make and sell these cards, Shirley?


View Larger Map

I'm the Map...I'm the Map, I'm the Map, I'm the Map...

Thank you so much to all of you who have taken the time to look up some information about your town and send Austin a letter for his school project. We have been having so much fun reading about your great cities! We've loved looking at the pictures of your towns, famous landmarks, and your beautiful families! We've gotten 50 cards/letters so far from 26 states and several countries! We've read every one! Well, Austin, Joe, and I have read them at least. Austin, who is 13 and basically uninterested in school, is actually excited to get these cards and read about your towns. Joe has decided that he wants to visit every town that's been mentioned because you've all made them sound so interesting. And thanks to the pictures you've sent, I'm enjoying putting faces to some of the names I keep seeing in my comments! :)

As far as my kids' names go...we've gotten one from Brooklyn, NY and one from Lexington, MA. Anyone from Austin, TX? Savannah, GA? Clayton, MO? Or Clayton, AL? Or Clayton, CA? Jackson, MS?

I hope this map works. You should be able to zoom in and out and if you click on a marker, you should be able to read the name of the town and the name of the person who sent the letter from there.


View Larger Map

Sorry I didn't think to stop and take a picture of my toilet-wading daughter yesterday. Will these pictures from July suffice?

More Dumb Crooks

I have a feeling I'm going to be do nothing but opening mail for the next few weeks! I think this is going to be fun seeing where all the mail comes from so I'm setting up a map for my blog. I'll mark the city, state, and country for each piece of mail he receives. That way everyone can see where they come from. I have the most awesome readers!!! Thank you!

Oh and a few of you asked when the project is due. It's an ongoing project, so as long as you get the cards/letters to us by May, it's all good. :) And it doesn't matter where you're from. The more places, the better!

Have you guys seen this? These two guys wheeled their roommate down the streets of New York in an office chair. Their destination? A check cashing store. Why? To cash this guy's social security check. Strange, but hey this is New York, right, so seeing a guy being wheeled down the street in an office chair is probably not the weirdest sight you'll ever run across in this city. Here's the thing though... The guy in the chair was recently deceased. Yep, that's right. These guys wanted to cash their buddy's social security check so they propped his dead body up in a chair and pushed him down the street to the check cashing place. Hey, it worked in Weekend at Bernie's, so why not? "Why don't we just pretend he didn't die? Just for a bit!"

At what point do you get so desperate for $355 that you think taking a corpse to a bank would be a good idea? And these were not teenage punks we're talking about here. These were men in their 60s. Men who should have had a modicum of wisdom. Men who should have, somewhere along the past 65 years, learned that most people can tell the difference between a live person presenting a check to be cashed and a dead body that doesn't speak or move, sitting slumped over in a chair. Can you just hear their conversation?

I think he's dead.

We should call 911.

Yeah. Although.....

What are you thinking?

Let's cash his social security check first. It would be a shame to just let it sit there uncashed. It's not going to do him any good now.

But won't he have to cash it himself?
Hmmm, you've got a point there. Well, let's take him with us.

Umm hello? He's dead. How are we going to take him with us?
We'll just push him in this office chair. It's got wheels.

Good idea! But what if the teller realizes he's dead?
We won't actually take him in the store with us. We'll just leave him sitting out on the street. No problem.

People never cease to amaze me.

Where do You Live?

My oldest son, Austin, is doing a project in school for social studies. The class is studying geography right now. I was hoping some of you might want to help him out. If you're interested, here's what you can do to help...

* Either send a post card or a letter.

* Write the date on the card or letter.

* Write where you live (town, state, country).

* Write a little about the area where you live.
SOME SUGGESTIONS:
What major cities you are near, what your area is known for, any famous people from your area, what you like about your area, landmarks/tourist attractions, climate/weather, major industries, population of your town, etc.
(If you write in a language other than English, please provide a translation.)

* Place a photo of yourself or family or house in the envelope if sending a letter.

* Mail it to
Dawn Meehan
PO Box 66274
Chicago, IL 60666

Thanks for your help!!!