You Just Never Know When You Might Need Green Ric Rac

My 6 year old was assigned a family project to do this past week. Of course, being the highly ambitious family we are, we waited until the day before it was due to begin. Lex was given the outline of a snowman on card stock and, as a family, we were supposed to use anything but crayons and markers to decorate it. So, my kids dragged out my many boxes of craft supplies that are neatly stowed away in the attic.

Lex found some paint and immediately slapped a dozen colors on the snowman, smearing them around, covering every inch of his body. I looked at the brownish explosion of pain covering the snowman, and not wanting to squash Lexi's creativity, said, "What are you doing?! Do you really want it all BROWN like that? Does that look like a snowman? Don't you want some help? Can I help you with that Vicki? Please?"

This made me think back to when my mom wouldn't let me help her put tinsel on the Christmas tree. You see, she's insane a perfectionist. She passed this trait down to my sister. I, on the other hand, got the 'Eh, I'll slap it together and call it done' gene. I tried to hang tinsel the "right way". I really did. I started off carefully draping no more than two strands of the silvery stuff over the branch. I made sure each end of the tinsel hung equally on either side of the branch. I started doing this. But this method is boring. It takes too long. So before long, I would take fistfuls of tinsel and loft them up into the tree. Wads of silver strings stuck in clumps between the branches. My mom and sister would stop what they were doing and openly gasp, staring in shock, at me. My method was completely unacceptable to the perfectionist in them and I was fired from my post every year.

I tried really hard to help Lexi with her project without completely taking over. There's a fine line to walk in situations like this. "Should we make a dress or pants? Do you want to use pink fabric or blue? Do you want beads, gems, or buttons for eyes?" Give them choices and let them create, I say.

As they went through my numerous containers filled with crap stuff I'm never going to use, I came to the conclusion that I have a problem finishing what I start. Seriously, I have this huge container of fabric. I don't sew. I don't own a sewing machine. I've never learned how to sew. In fact, I'm not sure I could handle reattaching a button. So why is it that I have 287 pounds of fabric? Because you never know - some day I might just learn. Yes, I know. I have a problem. One day, they'll find me buried in my house among a trillion boxes of miscellaneous stuff, half a dozen cats eating Cap'N'Crunch because I haven't been able to find the cat food for days, another half dozen cats stuck in boxes of macrame supplies ordered from eBay because who knows? - one day I might go back to the 70s and learn how to make some groovy wall decorations.

Actually since joining a twelve step program, I've made some progress. I'm letting go of some of the things I've collected for projects I haven't even started. You might recall seeing some of my eBay auctions for unused sewing patterns...

"I bought this pattern at a fabric store thinking that I’d make my girls cute outfits to wear. However, because my sewing skills, much to my mother’s chagrin, consist of hot glue and duct tape, the pattern sits here untouched. My plans of learning how to sew have been replaced by plans of selling this pattern in an attempt to get some of my money back. If you do indeed know how to sew, I’m sure you could make absolutely adorable outfits with this pattern. This pattern is not cut. In fact, I’ve not even opened the envelope and taken the pattern out. If you, unlike me, know how to turn an envelope full of sheets of tissue paper with black markings on them, into a dress, then this item is for you! In fact, if you’re really good at sewing, you could make a few outfits, come up with your own exclusive label, open an eBay store, and sell them for many times the cost of the fabric. I would certainly much prefer to buy the finished product online as opposed to figuring out how to make it myself. Anyway, you’re bidding on this brand new, never opened pattern. Regular USPS shipping on this item if FREE! If you want it mailed Priority, I will be happy to do that at your expense - just email me with instructions. Insurance is optional, but once I drop the package at the post office, it is no longer my responsibility. For example, if my son decides to pour a bottle of glue into the envelope, or my daughter spills a glass of juice on the pattern, that’s my responsibility and I will fully refund your money. If, however, I take the envelope to the post office and a disgruntled mail carrier sets fire to it, a pack of wild dogs rip into it, or a mail sorting machine shreds it, it’s out of my hands, so you may want to add insurance. I will leave feedback for you as soon as I’ve received your payment. This comes from a smoke-free, pet-free home. Please ask me any questions before placing your bid. Happy bidding! :)

Bin of fabric for no apparent purpose

Bag full of yarn and half-finished crochet projects

Almost finished cross stitch project. I started this almost 14 years ago. I should finish it any day now.

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A bunch of stuff you just never know if you'll need.

More important stuff

And yet more stuff. You just never know when you're going to need pom poms, embroidery floss, beads, and green ric rac.

LOL! The product of my brief stint with jewelry making. I have a couple dozen of these. Shhhh, don't tell my family - this is what they're getting for Christmas. Maybe wrapped in tinsel. ;)