Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Another Edition of Wackadoo Googlers

It's been a really long time since I checked my stat counter and took a look at the psychotic interesting things people have googled that have landed them on my blog. Here are a few of the many weird searches people have done that have brought them here.

my mom doesn't call or visit
And this is a problem because...?

My son pees and poops without his underwear on the potty
Ummm, congratulations?

why does my six pack disappear after dinner
How did you manage that? Mine hangs around and makes messes, asks me for stuff, and gets into more food.

how come you can only see two of my six pack?
The other four are in school?

why did i pee my pants at the gym?
I could be wrong, but it was probably because you had to go to the bathroom. Oh yeah, and exercise is evil.

love my kids but they're wearing me down
Join the club, my friend, join the club.

cheap sleep six suites disney world
Fun tongue twisters for the whole family!

what do you do when windows movie maker has xs where the pics are supposed to be
Cry, throw the computer across the room, or start all over again.

she grew a mustache
Are you sure her brother didn't just color her with marker?

sit in a bath of vodka to get drunk
Inebriation by osmosis. Hmmm, interesting theory.

funny word for mom who gets their child to clean their room
Miracle Worker?

when you are bored blog
I think I'm a little offended that my blog came up under this search.

lazy laziest mom wife momma
Now, I'm really offended!

my yearly rectal exam site: blogspot.com
OK, I take back what I said about the last two searches!

blog funny awesome woman mother
Now that's more like it!

do matchbox cars flush down the toilet to septic system
No, no they do not. They do, however, necessitate the removal of the toilet to get them out. Just sayin'.

i don't know the real author of this but it is what my mother and father always said to all seven of their children
That's me! That's me! Because I Said So!

she is not going to bring her kids to my house is she?
Hey now!

THE FOLLOWING ARE SEARCHES THAT MAKE YOU SHAKE YOUR HEAD IN WONDER

can a little girl have the same name as her mom

does zoo's smell?

bzzing masquito's biters?

but, and, because, or, so

because of my body langwage my persanality not look ok

igaday

THE FOLLOWING ARE SEARCHES THAT NEED 90% FEWER WORDS

time to come out, he told me & i said i'd only been in for 6 minutes & he said that's not true. you've been in the whole day & i shrugged & said all i could remember was the last 6 minutes.

when my toddler vomits up whole milk and it is chunky and looks curddled

i want to color my hair, it has a tendency to turn orange and brassy if i lighten it, what can i do

im looking foor an ear of drie and shucked ear ofcorn that i can download on my computer


AND FINALLY, THE FOLLOWING SEARCHES ARE BLATANT ATTEMPTS TO BE MENTIONED ON MY BLOG

giving dawn meehan something interesting to find on her google

how to make a google list on dawn meehans blog

bat poop brought me here dawn

16 comments:

Bailey's Leaf said...

Time to come out . . .6 minutes . . . sounds like a Brian Andreas poem. Look him up. I have a few of his prints on my daughter's wall.

Funny stuff with that google search thing. One time I came up under something about cheese coming out of a toenail. "Baby, that isn't cheese," I said, "That would be infection."

Much More Than Mommy said...

The last three cracked me up!

kellyH said...

these are so funny!! thanks for the smile, I hope you smiled too. :)

TornadoTwos said...

haha, these are great. Wonder about the story behind some of those searches, or probably I'm better off not knowing. I checked and the number 1 search that brings people to my site is "yellow vomit". Fabulous.

Christina said...

The last three are hilarious! Just shows you have great readers!

Anonymous said...

Actually, osmosis is when water diffuses from an area of high water potential to an area of low water potential. More solutes, like alcohol, make a solution have a more negative water potential. Since only water moves during osmosis, you can't get drunk by osmosis. You can, however, get drunk by diffusion (the movement of solutes from an area of high concentration to low concentration).

Dawn said...

Ohmygosh! Bill Nye, The Science Guy reads my blog!!!

MaBunny said...

lol Dawn. I always like these posts you do - they make me laugh. Some are downright scary.

Kim said...

Haha. The funniest search term I ever got on my blog was "pregnant big butt" Hahaha.

Natasha said...

I LOVE "bat poop brought me here Dawn" xDDD

2012 said...

I love the last three, make me laughing :D

Jen@Scrapingirl said...

How in the word do you find out what people google to get here? Did that make sense?? Those were hilarious!!

Kristine said...

LOL - love it! Thanks for the laugh.

Magda said...

HAHAHAHAHAH!!!
Those are great.
Thanks for the laugh.

melissa said...

i wrote a post about my daughter and her crush on justin bieber. and now? the biggest google search that leads people to my blog is...has justin bieber lost his virginity.

sigh.

Hands to Work, Hearts to God said...

This is hilarious! You made my day! Patsy from
HeARTworks

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