Monday, February 8, 2010

A New Chapter

So, a lot of you have written and asked what's going on with me and Joe. In a nutshell, we're getting divorced. As much as I long to share the details with you (because it's cathartic for me, and because I want those in similar situations to know they're not alone), I just can't write about it here. It's not that I don't want to be authentic, or that I'm trying to pretend that everything is fine and dandy. Things are not fine and dandy right now. But my kids occasionally read my blog and they don't need to be reading any negative stuff about their dad or details about the divorce.

Plus, I started this blog to share the lighter side of life and there's really nothing funny about what's going on right now. I know you guys all have your own drama and your own strife. You don't need to read about mine. I want to provide a little escape from all the ickiness of life and share the funny stuff instead.


Thank you all for all your support and your prayers. They're very much appreciated! I feel like you're all part of my extended family. I never would have thought I'd have thousands of cyber friends I'd never even met, but I do. You are. And I'm very blessed! :)

122 comments:

Michelle said...

Oh, Dawn - *hugs* to you. You're lucky to have so many great friends to help support you. And know that if you ever need anything, a chat, a lunch, or more -- just call.

DarcsFalcon said...

Dawn, I just wanted to tell you that my thoughts and prayers are with you, Joe, and your kids as you navigate through this difficult water. I send you hugs, and want you to know you're not alone.

Vanessa

Autumn said...

I'm so sorry Dawn! I'll be praying for you and your family! Divorce is such a hard thing to go through.

Hannah said...

Dawn, I don't usually comment, but your blog has brought me a lot of laughter, and I appreciate your writing.

Will definitely be praying for you and your family during this time.

Gilsner said...

Oh wow, Dawn. I hope you're okay. Divroces, no matter how 'right' it may be, hurt. It's not just the end of a relationship but a change in the way you thought life would play out. It's hard. But rest assured, my friend, that after the hurt and sadness comes the fact that it's a new start with new opportunities and memories. It may not be the way you wanted it to be, but what ever is?

I know you want to keep your blog on the light side, but I think I speak for everyone (because I'm bossy like that) when I say that if you ever need us, we'll be here. We don't expect you to be funny and happy all the time. After all, you're human.

*hugs* to you and your family as you begin this new adventure!

justjaime31 said...

I'm sorry. I have been through a divorce with 2 kids. It sucks. Thats really the best way to sum it up :-)

Hang in there.

sharalyns said...

((hugs)) I'm sorry. Praying for your whole family!

plainprecious said...

I know that the decison to divorce wasnt an easy one. I know first hand because I have been there done that. There comes a time in your life where you have to say what is best for my family. For me it was like a weight was taken off me when I finally said enough is enough. But on the other hand I morourned the loss of family. I knew that it was going to be a big change for my kids. It took awhile for things to feel right. For all of us. The kids took it hard but they came to the realization that mom was happier especially when I met my new husband. Things happen for a reason. I am sure things will fall into place with you and your kids as well. And extended family too. Dont feel bad I went through that stage. Follow your heart. God bless

Pam said...

You are not alone! I wish you the strength to make wise decisions, and a good lawyer. I've been there, done that and consider my divorce the best 200 lbs I ever lost! You seem to be very strong willed, and it is hard, but moreso on your kids as they will not understand. Check to see if the schools have a support program for kids of divorced parents, or find a local Kids Under 21 program. They need to know that there are many others in the same situation.
I will keep you and your prrecious children in my prayers.

Dawn said...

Thank you. Yes, I got my kids signed up for counseling months ago, actually. Not sure how much it's helping, but I feel better that they have counselors and peers with divorced parents to talk with every week.

~M~ said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. You're right, it's best not to knock your (former) spouse to your kids - it makes you the better person.

Kristine said...

I'm so sorry Dawn! I just wanted to say, kudos to you for not giving the details. Too many are too willing to bring out all that is wrong with the ex-spouse in front of the kids. It hurts everyone and helps no one.

Hugs to you. I wanted so badly to hear that things were getting better. I'm sure you wanted so badly for things to just be better. So sad that they seem to have gotten worse instead.

Tammy said...

Dawn, I'm very sorry to hear that you're going through this. I know you can't write in your blog to tell us what is happening, but you need to write what is happening in a personal blog or diary. Not only for you to vent or to document whatever crazy things might go on, but because later, when things transition to a new normal, you will be able to look back and see what God has brought you through. And some day, when your kids are adults, you might want to share some things with them if they ask.

God bless you all.

bearhugg said...

((hugs))
I am sorry to hear that my favorite blogger and super mom is going through some tough times. I admire your fortitude and your unwavering concern for the best interest of your children. We (your loyal readers, fans, and cyber friends) love you Dawn. I hope and pray for a speedy and amicable resolution for you.

Six-Pack Momma said...

Dawn, Thank you for opening up your home to all of us. I wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your stories and your insight. I really feel like I know you. God bless.

{HUGS}

rthling said...

Oh, my friend, my heart is breaking for you and your family. I know this must be a very difficult time for you all. I have thought of you often and wondered if your marriage would survive. I have also prayed for you periodically.
Thank you for sharing. I know that sounds morbid, but life has its good times and its bad. We wouldn't be very supportive if we only clamored for the good.
I know I am a stranger to you, but I really care about y'all. Keep moving forward, Hon. Stay in church. Dive into God's comforting Word. He will sustain you when others fail.

NeverEnoughTime said...

praying for you all....

Deborah said...

Oh, Dawn!!! I am SO sorry to hear that your marriage has died. Yes, it is a death only in some ways harder, because he's still alive but the dream and the relationship aren't. May God's light shine in your heart during your darkest hours, bringing you peace and comfort and, yes, love.

April M said...

Dawn, I can only imagine what you are feeling right now, but I admire your courage to move forward. Your stories and humor have been such a blessing to me. I am so grateful to have found your blog and I feel privileged to have met you in person.
My prayers are with you and your family as you navigate this new chapter in your life.
April

MHW said...

I kinda reckoned that could be a possibility - just wanted to say Good For You for being able to carry on functioning and producing an excellent blog and really, just keeping going fullstop. No mean feat.

And now something my Mum used to always say to me but this time with sincerity and without that awful sinking feeling that went with it... I hope you're proud of yourself!

Rachel E. said...

Dawn, I am so sorry to hear that you and Joe are getting divorced. I'm sure you've made the best decision for yourself and for the kids, but I just wanted to say I'm really sorry that you find yourself in this situation. My heart goes out to all of you and I am holding you close in prayer.

Mandy said...

I have never left a comment before, but I have been following you since the "Ebay" story. Good luck to you and your kids. Just remember to keep strong in your faith in God and he will pull you through!

Anonymous said...

Just in case you've ever had any doubts about your writing...

I'm an atheist, biochemistry student, and a girl with no intentions of ever, EVER having kids, and I think your blog rocks--and no, I didn't want kids before I started reading your blog either! ;)

Anyway, hoping everything is going relatively well for you, the kids, and Joe. *virtual hugs from Canada*

Crystal said...

Sending you hugs. You and the kids will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Rebecca said...

Oh, Dawn. I'm so sorry. My parents divorced when I was 16. And while it really sucked for me, in the end, I'm glad they did. I went from living in a house of pain and tension and anger to a house where there was pain, but we could deal with it out in the open, heal it, and move on. In the end, it was healthier for all of us.

*hugs*

Much More Than Mommy said...

I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this, and I will be one of the many praying for you. And for your kids, and for Joe. I pray that you'll *continue* to be able to see the lighter side in things, even as you go through all these changes.

SubWife said...

I am sorry you are going through this. Kudos for not posting the details - it's always better to be a bigger and better person and not put your former spouse down in front of his kids.

You got your kids signed up for counseling. Have you considered counseling for yourself? Please remember to take care of yourself as well.

Hugs.

Lynn said...

You know I'm always here for you if you need me! Got a good shoulder to cry on...a good listening ear!
Know that I'm always here praying!
Hebrews 6:17-20 Wherein God, willing more abundantly to shew unto the heirs of promise the immutability of his counsel, confirmed it by an oath: That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold upon the hope set before us: Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast, and which entereth into that within the veil; Whither the forerunner is for us entered, even Jesus, made an high priest for ever after the order of Melchisedec.
Prayer Bears
My email address

Sandy in Illinois said...

Dawn,
Hugs and prayers.

Laura G said...

Want you to know how brave I think you are. You are guaranteed my prayers.

nutralady2001 said...

Oh Dawn sweetie I'm soooo sorry to hear this. Prayers going up here for you, Joe and the kids xxx

Elaine said...

Aw Dawn.... I'm soooo sorry to hear that. I hope the divorce will be as painless for the kiddies as possible and I hope that you're doing ok.... *hugs*

Clare, UK said...

Dawn, that's really sad news, but sometimes it's just for the best. Hard to see now, but one day you will look back and be glad the good times happened without it being overshadowed by the rubbish things. My thoughts are with you and the kids right now.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear your going thru this now, it really will get better.
It sounds like your "timeline" is the same as mine,I'm 67 and doing it.Good days outnumber the bad ones.
Having a super support group is wonderful

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

I am so sorry to hear your sad news. This must be an extremely stressful time for you. Sending a hug.

StarGazer722 said...

Hi Dawn. I'm fairly new to your blog but I absolutely love how you write. You brighten my day and I hope things get better for you. Coming from someone that was a child in a divorce- I commend you for trying to keep your children out of it. It can be so hard but it really is the bigger and best thing to do. I wish you all the best.

apaprikao said...

I am sorry to hear this Dawn! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children.

Stay strong!

Anonymous said...

Never left a comment before but I also have followed you from your "EBay" days - always look forward to reading your blog in my lunch hour, so it feels like this is happening to a "friend" if I might put that scenario on it. So sorry to hear the news, but you are a strong and vital lady, and have to do what's best for you as a person, as well as for your family, they might not fully understand that now, but they will. Thinking of you all, and "hugs" from Scotland

Sam said...

As always, you handled this post with class. I think it's amazing that you even find time to write, let alone wrangle six kids - so I can only imagine what you're dealing with at home. You (and your blog) helped make my first couple years at home a little easier, and a little lighter and I'll always be grateful for that! You guys are in my thoughts and prayers.

Jennie said...

I'm sorry to hear about your divorce, I know how hard it is for all parties involved. I hope that you are all able to come through this stronger (because the universe only gives you what you can handle).

Your blog is a bright spot in my cyber life, I'm always so happy when I see that there's a new post.

Sarah said...

I'm so very, very sorry to hear this. I will be praying for your family. I hope you have a good support system and that people at your church will surround you with love (and not judgment like some churches I've known, sadly). Know that you are loved, most importantly by God, as I think you know. I'll be praying custody with the kids doesn't get awfully ugly and as horrible as things are that they will go as smoothly as possible...not trying to minimize what you're going through at all--just am trying to say that I know some divorces are much "uglier" than others and I hope yours is not one of the worst ones. OK, shutting up now so I don't did myself into a deeper hole! Love & prayers from "the Big D"!!!

Anonymous said...

A simple thank you for caring about your children and shielding them from harmful words about their father. That touched my heart, because my life, starting at age nine, has revolved around the negative, evil, and hateful things my mother speaks towards my father. My parent's divorce was not dreadfully hard to get through. But the hate and negativity my mother raised us with damanged me in a way few will ever understand.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and the family. My your reactions and actions glorify God in this period of your life.

Knitty said...

Wishing the best for everyone in your family.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Rebecca, I come from a split home as well, but I'm so glad they did, they're both happier now and I think it helped me become more secure in both their love as they could then concentrate on us rather than their problems with each other. I'm also in the middle of a divorce right now, so understand how you feel. I respect you for keeping things to yourself so that your kids won't be hurt. All the best and God bless!

Anonymous said...

Dawn, I want to commend you on your decision not to post about your divorce, despite how therapeutic it would be for you, knowing that there is a possibility your children might read it. I work for a divorce attorney, and have a friend who is going through this. I am amazed everyday at how many adults forget that they need to focus on their children, and what is best for them, instead of focusing on revenge, or hurting the other person, or whatever else.

So, while I'm sorry to hear that you and Joe have decided to divorce, I am glad to know the kids are your focus. I wish you all the strength that you will need to make it over this hurdle in life.

Michelle Hoad said...

I'll say some prayers for you. I was a single mom with four kids, and even though it was tough at times, it can be done.

jenny222 said...

Dawn, I'm very sorry to hear of the divorce. Know that alot of people are praying for you and that you will be ok. You're a very strong person.

Tracy said...

Dawn I am so sorry. Big hugs and prayers going your way.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry. You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers since you first shared about your difficulties. I'll continue to pray.

Bethany said...

I'm sorry to hear that, but I applaud you SO MUCH for not posting and dragging more drama into the kids' lives. I'll be praying for your whole family during this time of transition.

Anonymous said...

Dear Dawn
First of all I am so sorry for you all. I am not in your situation and do not feel qualified to give advice or anything so I won't! But know that my heart aches for your whole family. You will be in our prayers. Please do not ever think that you always have to be happy on your blog. I don't think that anyone expects that. That said though you ARE hilarious. Thank you so much for the comic relief in my wild days. I will continue praying for you...
Elizabeth

Kara said...

(((hugs))) I'm sorry you are going through this. I hope you and your family will be ok.

Anonymous said...

Oh Dawn, I'm very sorry. Sending prayers and hugs!

Steph in ND

Chris P said...

I am so sorry that you & your family are going through this! I congratulate you for taking the high road by not criticizing Joe where the kids might see it. My parents divorce was not pretty & my dad & his new wife had no problem saying bad things about my mother in front of me. When I got old enough, I refused to see them & to this day (30 years later) I have a very rocky relationship with them.
Take care sweetie, my prayers are with you!

Kate said...

I'm so sorry, Dawn. But you're strong, you and the kids will make it through. ::hugs::

Carol from Iowa said...

Dawn, I am sorry that you and your family are going through this. Please know that I will keep all of you in my thoughts and prayers. I read your blog all the time and you are an amazing woman and an even more amazing Mom. Take care.

Rick said...

Oh Wow! I just happened to click over and then get hit with this news. I am very sorry. I will use this as the Lord's directive to pray for you, the children and Joe. We've never met, but the news is truly very sad to me. I'm sending you my my in a blog/internet/ electronic/never met you kind of way.

Jenny said...

Dawn,

I am so sorry this is happening to you and your family. I am going through the same thing at the moment, so know you are not alone. If I can do anything to help, listen or share advice, let me know. Good luck to you,

Jenny

Anonymous said...

Dawn, So sorry to hear the big D word, but figured as much after the post with Joe's trip to the emergency room. You don't need a seventh kid. Husbands can and should be adults who just need a little more tending then us. Think I'll text my hubby of 18 years how much I appreciate him. Best wishes and good luck.

Rick said...

Joe's part in my doodle of you and the family takes on new meaning now.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry for this difficult time in your life but you have to do what is right for you and your family. Thank YOU for saying that your kids don't need to read anything negative about their father. I appreciate you allowing them to have their own idea and opinion of who their dad is. I've always had a hard time with friends that say they felt they needed their kids to know their "real" father/mother and would tell them all the truths but they were not anything that their kids needed to know or experienced. Bless you and your family. ALL of them. Thank you for sharing what you do. I LOVE your blog and check it daily! Mel.

jessica said...

I'm so sorry for you. I have three small kids and am currently going through a divorce also. My whole life was turned upside down and it was awful. It's only been 6 months since we separated, but I'm already feeling so much better. I realize every day how miserable I was and how unhealthy that was for my kids. And although it's harder now in a lot of ways, it's better. Be strong!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn,
I've never commented before, but I've been reading your blog for about a year now, and I just wanted to say I'm so sorry you are going through this :( My parents split up when I was in high school - my dad was also a high-functioning alcoholic. My mom had been waffling for years on whether to leave him, and finally she reached a breaking point and did. And it was the best possible thing she could have done. She stopped enabling him, and he was finally able to pull himself together. As hard as it is, I have no doubt that you are doing the best thing for your family.

Gayle in NC said...

Dawn,
I've always thought you are an awesome mother, just because you can look at the lighter side of things and take the antics of your children and turn it into a learning lessons for other parents everywhere. Now, I have to commend you ever more, because with everything you have going on, you are obviously still focusing on your children. I'm so sorry things couldn't work out for you and Joe. I hope the kids are handling things as well as they possibly can. My prayers and with you and your entire family.

Gayle in NC

Snow Mommy said...

Hugs and prayers for your family!

Janet said...

Dawn - you and your family are in my thoughts. Don't forget to find time to talk about your feelings - good and bad - you need to have a place you feel safe expressing yourself.

Dawn said...

Dawn,
I'm so sorry. I was in your shoes once upon a time, 16 years ago. Had a 1y, 4y and 6yo at the time. It took a long while for me to get over the death of the dreams and hopes I had for our family. I still loved the man I had married, but he changed to someone I didn't know, and he wanted out.

I am praying for ALL of you, for peace and healing. And it IS important not to trash the other parent in front of the kids. I am also a child of divorce. My mom tried to diminish our father, but it backfired. I am a lot like him, so whenever she made a negative comment about some aspect of him, it was like a hit to me also. I have 5 siblings, and none of us would care if we never saw her again. (she's not a nice person in many respects) We are in our 40's-60 now. How sad for our mother.
God be with you.

Yvonne said...

((((Hug)))

Your blog is a great place for us to go to laugh, but it's also a place for you to think of all the funnier things happening in your life. Thank God for blogging, right?

And remember....you're up for Hottest Mommy Blogger. You can just strut your stuff through this divorce.

Jen said...

Good luck to you and your family. Divorce sucks but have faith that you are making the right choices for everyone! Hugs and Love!!!

Sue said...

Very sorry, Dawn. I separated this fall. It sucks in some ways and is a relief in others. Hang in there.

Anonymous said...

Dawn,

I know it's been said a million times, but I want you to know you, Joe and the kids are in my thoughts and prayers. I really enjoy reading your blog, and I agree that you are not expected to be funny all the time. I also agree with you in not wanting the kids to read anything negative about their dad. After all he is their dad and that would hurt them to read or hear negative things about him. Kudos to you trying to keep that away from them. Divorce is always hard, no matter who you are or where you come from. I will always enjoy being a part of your "family" even though I don't always comment. Thank you for opening up your life to the "tens" of us out there, it's a hard thing to do. Prayers always. Angie

Christina said...

I'm a long time lurker and rarely comment but wanted to tell you how strong I think you are and give ((Hugs))

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your divorce. I pray for your families. Does that mean that you will have to get a job outside of your home?

tommygirl said...

Dawn, Thank you for sharing a difficult part of your life with us, and doing it with such class and concern for your children. So many parents get caught up in the fighting and loose sight of what is best for their kids. I hope whatever your futute holds that you, Joe and your children will be blessed.

Ruth said...

Just read this post, I'm so sorry. I kind of figured when you stopped gripping about him on your blog things had gone seriously wrong. Hang in there, keep blogging, it will help keep you sane!
Thank you for sharing your wonderful family with us, making me smile and laugh out loud with your funny stories in your book and making me feel like a "normal"
Mom of my larger family when everyone else thinks we're crazy!! LOL
I hope the next chapter of your life brings you much more happiness!! :)

Sunnyworld said...

Dawn, I'm so sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this. No matter how badly it makes you feel, your children must really be feeling awful, too. Once you are married and have children, you are always involved with the "ex;" so I admire you for not airing any of the details on your blog! I pray that you will have the best outcome possible during this time. I know this can't be an easy time for you.

Hildigunnur said...

aww, hugs!

Ellobie said...

My mom divorced my dad when I was 2 and it's probably the one thing I'm most grateful to her for. Our family was beyond broke for many years, but she single-handedly raised 3 college-educated, contributing members of society. You can do this!

Oh, and Hi Mom (she's the one who turned me on to your blog!)!

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn,

I don't have anything new to say - everyone else who has posted to your blog has said everything so eloquently. I just want you to know that at least one more person is holding you and your family in her thoughts.

Please make sure you take care of yourself along with taking care of everyone else. You have strength, courage and a sense of humor that not many are blessed with.

Sandy in Tucson

nydancer226 said...

You and the kids are in my thoughts.
Hugs!

Anonymous said...

You and the kids are in my thoughts and prayers!!! Thanks for thinking of the kids first and "protecting" them from negative comments.
{{{Hugs}}}
Shannon

Anonymous said...

Dawn,

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. My dad is also a recovering alcoholic and like you once said they may not be drinking anymore but their personalities are the same. So after 33 years of marriage my parents are divorcing and it does suck! My prayers are with you and the kids.

Robin said...

Oh Dawn...as much as you want to share the lighter, funny side of life (and you do a marvelous job of that) I know that right now what you are going thru must be close to Hell on Earth. I am SO sorry!! It brought tears to my eyes just reading those words. Please know I'll be praying for you and the kids as you go through this and praying for Joe too, that he gets the help that he needs and that the whole matter goes as smoothly as it can. I once read a comment made by Valerie Bertinelli regarding divorce. She said that you have to decide that you love your children MORE than you hate your ex. And that's how you deal with things and keep your children from feeling uncomfortable about the fact that their parents are no longer married.

I'm praying for you and your family.

Robin~

trousseau4 said...

Dawn you are in my prayers. I have just recently seperated from my husband of 20 years with 4 kids. It has been a long time coming and in the long run will be good for everyone. I commend you for not blogging about it and putting your kids needs first. I have followed your blog for over 2 years and love it becau it is not only hysterical, but it is genuine and real. I wish you and your family the best and know that although we may all just be "cyber" friends, we care about you.

MaBunny said...

Well Dawn, in a nutshell, that SUCKS!
I'm very sorry to hear about your impending divorce. I'm not going to pretend I know what you are going through, but please know that you will be in my prayers.
You are also a very smart woman for NOT dissing Joe in your blog for your kids sake. That was a very wise choice on your part. You are a great mom, a great cyber friend and all that jazz!
/hugs to you at this difficult hurdle in your life.

Megryansmom said...

Hugs Dawn! If you ever want to chat call me. Seriously! I'll meet you at Lou's for pizza or sumtin.

Bailey's Leaf said...

Sometimes living apart is a better relationship than together. My sister and her ex-husband have a good relationship now that they are divorced. He is an alcoholic who never left his addiction even in light of it affecting his children and marriage.

Feel our internet love. We're here for you!

Mama On The Move said...

One of these days we will all be reading a story in Guideposts about how you made it through and lived happily ever after!

You should possibly keep a private blog about what you are going through now. It may benefit someone later when you are ready to share it.

Praying for your family....

Stephanie said...

I am so sorry! I hope that everything works out for the best.

Donna said...

Dawn.....everyone has said what I wanted to say. But know that you are a terrific person and never blame it on yourself.
And yes, it is best to not put your kids thru more than they are already feeling.
You hang in there !
Your kids will survive this too !

Big Hugs from NE Indiana !
Life does get better.....

MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Hey Dawn, way to take the high road with this news. Always a class act girlfriend! You will brave through this like the champion that you are, with grace and humor! xoxo

Marly said...

Dawn, I'm so sorry you're going through all this. I understand why you can't share everything with us but I'm pretty sure you have some close friends who can be your therapists. I hope you and the kids can get through this and you have my virtual prayers with you.
You've really helped me see a lighter side to my kids and the crazy life of a mom.

Anonymous said...

I can't say anything more than everyone else has already said. I'm praying for you and the kids and hope you're doing okay.

(((BIG hugs))) from me to you.

Donna in PA :)

Alexandra said...

I'm really sorry to hear this. x

Nancy said...

*hugs* Hang in there! And you're smart to keep the kids out of it. I divorced my first husband almost 20 years ago. At that time I had a counselor tell me never to bad-mouth him in front of the kids. She was right--they figured it all out themselves. But I did learn that I should have told them what happened when they were old enough to know. Just the facts, not the opinions. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Gloria said...

I know that sometimes there are personal circumstances that make divorce necessary. I feel I know you through the words of your blog, and I believe that this is not a decision that you have made without a great amount of deliberation and thought.

May God bless you and help you through this troubling time. I have a young friend going through a divorce right now and it is not easy, especially when her narcissistic husband-to-be-ex is dragging his feet and making it as miserable as he can for her. I hope that your way will be smooth and that you and Joe can remain friends enough to do good co-parenting.

Take care!

Rebecca said...

I know that this is a difficult time, but I just wanted to say that I think you alwasy put your children first and commend your decision. Now is not the right time to discuss details, but it might be in the future... perhaps an eventual 3rd book.

I wish your family all the best as you navigate through this.

rskmom said...

(((hugs)))

Meg said...

Everything I want to say has been said, but I will reiterate because, I too, commend you for handling this with such class. My mother badmouthed my father after their divorce and it hurt because I am so much like him. Just last year, my mother told me that she had a 'wonderful conversation' with my father. I was floored. After much deliberation, I told her I was beyond shocked due to her badmouthing him for years. She said she was wrong to do that. She was wrong, but realizing that now does not erase the years of stuff I heard. So anyhow, I commend you for not blogging about it and putting your kids first.
You will be in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS.

SeriousCat said...

Dear Dawn,

Having been in your shoes some 15 years ago, all I can say is that no matter how bad it looks and feels now, it does get better.

Hang in there, I shall keep your family in my thoughts as you navigate this new chapter in your lives.

Denise from Australia.

Simple Country Girl said...

Just wanted you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Divorce is never an easy thing, but you will make it through as strong willed as you are. I went through a divorce 2 years ago from a 10 year marriage and it was one of the best things I have ever done. There are times I miss the "family" part of it, but my ex and I get along now for the kids sake. Time heals all wounds and it will for you too. I love the title "A New Chapter" because that is exactly what it is. I am such a different person than I was 2 years ago, all for the better. Keep your head up and I respect the fact you are keeping details off your blog. Even though it's hard sometimes, we must bite our tongue and not say anything bad about the "ex" for the kids sake. And later on down the road, they will respect you even more for that. You are a strong woman so I know you will be fine. You have been an inspiration to me and so many others. Keep Going Dawn!

Anonymous said...

Prayers for you, the kids, and Joe. I'm glad you have faith and humor and family. I hope you're not busy being so strong that you can't lean on them! :)

Angela said...

Dawn, I applaud you for handling the entire divorce situation with such grace and dignity. You really are an inspiration to me, and a wonderful example of the joys and trials of being a woman and a mother. Thank you for allowing us to be a part of your life through your writing, it enriches my life and reminds me to laugh even when things are tough. I wish you and your family all the happiness you deserve.

Jennifer said...

Thinking of you & your family. Going thru a divorce myself right now, so I understand not wanting to share. Stay strong, you'll be happier in the end.

Anonymous said...

Dawn,

I'm so sorry to hear of your divorce. I know this is a difficult time for you and your family. Several years ago, I too left my husband. He had a mental health issue that he was refusing to get treatment for. By the time he sought treatment I was so sick of dealing with him I left him anyway. After I left him, I watched him deteriorate and get worse--even with treatment. I thought this proved I had good reason to leave him. He was, after all, a mess. I didn't understand his illness and took things he did and said personally. Recently, he unexpectedly passed away at the age of 39. Things had gotten so bad that a few short months ago, I would have told you I didn't care if he died. However, now that it actually happened I feel much different. Now, I am left with many regrets about our marriage and beating myself up for leaving him. Perhaps as time goes on, I won't feel this way anymore but right now I would give anything to go back and redo it all.

I truly hope things work out for the best for you and your family. I believe you are doing the right thing by not talking badly of Joe to the kids. I made the same decision when my husband and I separated, and I am so glad I did.

Take care,
Julie in PA

JennyF said...

Your sense of humor will help you through the dark days ahead (And there will be some.) Best of luck to you, Joe and the kids through this transition.

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn,

Like many others, i've followed your blog but never commented before. I'm sorry to hear about your divorce, but you should feel so proud of how you are dealing with this. I've been seperated from my ex for three years now and was determined that our children (then aged 9 & 6) would continue to have a meaningful relationship with their dad. It hasn't been all smooth sailing but, I can happily say my ex and I are better friends now than we were before we seperated and our children are the one's who benefit from our new "relationship". They know they can call their dad anytimme, he is always welcome in our home and quite often we will have dinner together or celebrate birthdays.

Its never an easy road to travel along, but the benefits for yourself and your children will be so worth it in the long run.

Love and prayers to you and your cherubs


Amy
Australia

Anonymous said...

Dawn,
I'm so sorry to hear this. I know you're doing what's best for your family, and I hope you find all of the cyber and in-person support you need. Divorce is an awful but sometimes necessary fact of life. God bless you and your children as you go through this hard time. *7hugs* for you and your kids.

Amanda said...

So sorry you're going through this :( Prayers for your family.

Midlife Mama said...

Awww I'm so sorry. I am about to pull the plug on my own marriage, as well. Been there, done that before too. It's easier the second...er...third time. Yikes. Anyway, had you thought about starting a second blog that your kids don't know about, to vent and to start a support system for divorced moms such as yourself? I know, right -- in your "spare" time you could do a 2nd blog. Yeah right! LOL! But just a thought. Oh and also? A second thought? If you do blog about your divorce, either here or on another blog, you might want to wait until the legal part is done. You don't want him using the information from your blog to hurt you in the divorce. Know what I mean?

I'm just sayin'.

Anonymous said...

I had the pleasure of seeing Nicole Johnson last night, a wonderful evening with 800 girlfriends.

One thing she said. "God may not be able to get you out of it ( what ever you are going thru) but He will be with you while you go thru it"

Prayer for you and your family.

Jennifer in Wisconsin said...

"Promise me you'll always remember... You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.". Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh. I have this saying hanging in my kids room and hope you can post it somewhere to remind yourself in those tough times ahead. Good speed

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn, I am so sorry you have to go through this. I wanted to suggest a book you might like to read. It's called Crazy Time by: Abigal Trafford. I have been told it is a must read. Look it up online and read some of it and also the reviews. Thinking of you in Michigan, Kristine

Julia in Sweden said...

I sort of guessed that since he hasn't been mentioned in the blog lately and you seem to be even more busy than usual.
I don't know what to say. My heart goes out to you and your children. It is never an easy thing to make such a life-altering decision, but I truly believe it's for the best.
A lot of people often stay together for the children, but I have to say that's a mistake. You want to teach your children to pursuit happiness, but if they see that their parents are unhappy, what are they to believe? My parents should have split up years ago, but stayed together because of my sister and me, but we always knew that they were unhappy together and so it made us unhappy too.
You are in my heart and my thoughts.
Take care of yourself!

maggiebsmocks said...

((hugs)) to you and the children. And Joe too. I am sure this does not come easily for any of you. Life goes on. I pray for healing and strength for you.
maggieb!

Lyuda said...

Oh, wow, I am so shocked. I just did not see that coming. I mean, I have been reading your blog for a while, so I knew some of the problems you've had with your husband, but I didn't know it was that bad. I am so sorry to hear that! I will be praying for you and your family, especially for the kids not to be affected negatively by this. Hang in there!

Jennifer Foster said...

Thank you for sharing this. Love ya Dawn!

Sherry said...

I am so sorry to hear that you are divorcing. I am sure it isn't easy for any of you. I am praying for you, Joe, the kids and your entire family.

Anonymous said...

I really am so sorry to hear about you and Joe! You are a wonderful person and have put up with alot. Being a teacher I can really say that sometimes as long as friendly as possible divorce really is the best answer.

I know you believe in God and I am sure he will see you through this time!

Good luck Dawn all your readers are here for you
x
x

Anonymous said...

You all are in my prayers during this difficult time. Hope it goes as smoothly and amicably as it can...

Ellen said...

Dawn, I have been away from your blog for a while and just saw the news about you and Joe. I am so deeply sorry for all of you, but want you to know you are all in my prayers. It's all been said- I know this had to be very difficult decision. I wish you all strength to get through this and continue to thrive and find your new normal. Be good to you! Wishing you peace.

BiblioMom said...

I just found your blog this weekend while playing my silly little google game with myself. The one where I google something random and see what blog I land on. It's great fun. What I wanted to say is that I respect you so much. I'm a single divorced mother of two and former blogger and think that the little you write here for your kids to find the better. Good luck!

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