Monday, June 2, 2008

I'm Not Cool

"Dad brought us Steak & Shake for lunch today."

"Lucky you. Did he bring it for both you and Savannah?"


"Did he just drop it off or did he stay and eat with you?"

"He just dropped it off."

"I guess that would be too embarrassing if he stayed and ate with you guys, huh?"

"Nah. It would be ok if Dad ate with us at school."

"Really? It wouldn't embarrass you if Dad ate with you and your friends?"

"Nah, my friends like him."

"So, could I come to school and eat lunch with you guys?"

I've never seen such a look of horror cross Austin's face. It was worse than the time I dared to touch his shoulder while we were shopping.

"What? So Dad can eat with you, but I can't? Ohh I see how this works. Dad's fine, but Mom's just way too embarrassing. Uh-huh. So that's how I rate."

"Well, it's just that Dad is goofy and immature like us."


"He fits in with us."

"I see"

I don't know how, but I somehow resisted giving him the whole, "I was in labor with you for 18 hours! I nursed you for 9 months. I got up with you several times a night for over a year and a half until you finally stopped crying and decided to sleep through the night. I played four million hours of Pokemon on your Gameboy with you until you learned how to do it yourself, I took you to the zoo six thousand times during your I Love Elephants stage. And you puked in my hair when you were sick!" lecture.

Such is the fate of a mother.


Beverly said...


jodi-mother of six said...

I don't think I'd have been able to resist...and I'd add the 17 million trips to practices and games etc. too!!

Marga said...

Sorry Dawn, I know, that's just the way it is. Mothers aren't cool. Had such a thing with my 13year old today. I won't repeat what he called me. We're good for everything except seeing with them in public. And we're not allowed to tell them to brush their teeth or to wear their braces. Or tell them anything. Except to do the laundry, cooking, picking them up from party's late at night etc.
Don't take it to hard girl, your younger kids still love you! (At least, that's what my 11year old came to tell me after she heard her brother call me a *****.)
Hugs for you, you rule!

Chels said...

LOL great post!

Anonymous said...

My parents have four girls ages 30-18 and my mother's new thing is "I carried you for 9 months and then dad gets to walk you done the aisle on your wedding day?"

Mothers are unsung heroes : )

My Kids' Mom said...

I know it isn't fair to say that "Dads get all the fun", but sometimes it feels that way.

Robin said...

You're not alone!

Gomomyourock said...

We call it being "chopped liver" around here!

Sara said...


I have a 10 month old and am considering becoming a stay-at-home mom, but I don't know, it kind of seems like you lose part of your identity. Why did you decide to stay home?

Debbie Yost said...

and THAT is why dad has the energy to be the cool guy.

Anonymous said...

Ahhh, the underappreciated job of being a Mom. Isn't it the BEST?! LOL :p

Donna in PA :)

Karen in AZ said...

Dawn, the problem is that you didn't start brainwashing them soon enough. I started at 18 months with my son. It goes like this: You will never be too old (even if you think you are) to be hugged and kissed by your Mom.

I repeated it often.

Result: Even as a teenager, all I had to do was say, "What are you not too old for?" And my son would walk over as he said, "I am never too old to hug or kiss my Mom." and give me a hug (and sometimes a kiss ).

See, brainwashing DOES work. You just have to work it from a young age and you too will be able to eat lunch with your kids!

Anonymous said...

Dont feel bad I've called my 8 year old daughter, Sierra, peanut for her whole life and one day I said i'll see u later peanut she was like "mom um mom please dont call me peanut anymore its just not cool" my feelings were so hurt and I too wanted to tell her that i carried her for 9 months went into false labor with her for a week straight b4 the 15 hours of labor and 8 months of colic that I enjoyed so much. eh I guess they dont see all we've done till they have their own. ---sasha

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn, My 11 year old son would tell you he would rather hang out with me then his dad. Even though I am the one telling him what to do and when. Dad just seems to be to busy hunting, fishing, golfing. working. I have formed the strongest bond with him. Sad for Dad though it is his own fault. Kristine in Michigan.

Sheila in Germany said...

Personally, I think I'd take it as a compliment that you aren't considered "goofy and immature" and that you DON'T fit it in with a bunch of children that age! Who wants to?! LOL

HeyItsBeej said...

Learn to belch on command. Loudly. Next time you're around his friends, share your new-found talent.

Instant Mom-stardom.


SubWife said...

I think you are super cool and I would have lunch with you any time!

Anonymous said...

Hee hee hee!! That's great. That will probably be my fate when my kids get older. My husband is MUCH cooler than me. (ie goofy, immature, etc.)

Abby goes to Denmark! said...

I just have to share amusement from my school the other day...

One of my 6th grade boys got hit HARD in the groin with a soccer ball during recess so I walked him to the nurse's office so he could lay down for a bit and catch his breath. His mom (head of PTO) happened to be in the office at the same time and after hearing about it she says and I quote: "So, do you want me to check it out or do you want to just sit down for a little bit?"

The look on his face was priceless! Yes, mom, the 12 year old boy who JUST had puberty class that morning totally wants you to check out his balls for him!!!!

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