Sunday, March 11, 2018

Embarrassing My Teens (Just One More Service I Offer)

There's just something so satisfying about hearing your kids whine, "Mooooom" when you tell a stupid joke. It's one of my favorite sounds. If you ever need help contriving ideas to elicit this joyous sound from your own children's lips, I've got you covered. 
Behold . . .

When you want to thank your daughter for helping you so often by doing the laundry, it's nice to do a load for her. And personalize it. By adding messages to her shirts.

When you tell your son, "Don't stay up all night playing Fortnight or I'll ground you. And then he makes the mistake of sending his sister a picture of him playing at 3:30AM.

Or you could ask them if their butt is chafing in front of everyone in the check-out line at the grocery store.

Or you could (gasp) touch their shoulder while out in public!

They also love it when you comment on their Facebook wall. Not that they actually use Facebook because Facebook is for old people. But they probably have a page just sitting there. Writing I love you on their wall is definitely grounds for a, "Moooooom!"

Or you could wear "mom clothes."
Or you could wear cool clothes. Because you're not cool. And you should be wearing "mom clothes."
Or you talk.
Or you could walk too closely to them.
Or you could ask them how school was.
Or you could do something heinous like breathe.
Really, the sky's the limit here. Pretty much anything you do or don't do can be embarrassing to your kid until he's in his 30s.

So what has elicited, "Mooooom," from your kids?


BarbaraShowell said...

The car, of course! I was a single mom of 5, and never had a black, late model, well kept SUV. They used to ask me to drop them off a block away. Out of spite, I got a good sound system and rotated Johnny Cash, Korn, and Wu tang. Hahahahahahahahaha!

Cindy said...

Oh my gosh, YES!! Especially just breathing! Ah, kids. Ya gotta love em!! :)

Practical Mama said...

I turn any occasion into a learning (ehem, lecturing) opportunity. Just the other day, while we were driving in the car, my son was telling something regular that happened and I couldn't miss that opportunity to teach them life lessons. My son was groaning "Mooooom!" enhanced with eye rolls, my daughter was laughing "mom: the only person in the world who can turn anything into a lecture".

Crazy Mom! said...

I used to threaten my kids to come to their HS at lunch in a bell shirt (I'm fat) and DANCE in the front hall or cafeteria and tell everyone whose mom I was.


Loretta Monroe said...

HAHAHAHAH! I think I am swiftly approaching the age where I am no longer able to breathe without the "Moooommm". But I am no longer changing diapers... so there's THAT! Perspective helps me keep some sanity.

who? said...

My husband and I will be helping with our high school's Grad Night party, which is Stat Wars themed. I was telling my husband that we are required to dress as the "Dark Side." My 15yo said, "Please don't do anything embarrassing! "
"You won't even be there! " I said.
"I'll feel it in my bones, " she replied.
I can't wait to do something embarrassing and post it for all to see!

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