Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Insert the Buckle Here

I'm in California right now because my agent, Janet Grant at Books and Such is hosting a retreat for her authors. It's going to be a great few days of networking with some amazing authors and learning from the informative workshops she's arranged.

My flight to Monterey was scheduled for 8:15 yesterday morning. The night before, the weathermen were predicting storms of apocalyptic proportions. I was so looking forward to this trip. I knew that this trip was going to be really beneficial to my writing career. After spending a week with a stomach virus running rampant through my family, I needed this trip. When the newscasters said that flights out of O'Hare would likely be cancelled, I started shaking and twitching. "You don't understand! I HAVE to go!"

Luck was on my side because mine was one of the last flights out of O'Hare before hundreds were cancelled.

I was thinking about making a new and improved safety demonstration for the airlines because really, the one they use now is pretty archaic. I mean, if you don't know how to fasten a seatbelt, you probably shouldn't be leaving your house. Instead of showing people how to fasten a seatbelt and put on an oxygen mask, I think the video should demonstrate how to get out of your seat without hanging on to the seat in front of you, pulling the occupant of said seat's hair, and annoying the snot out of her. It should also tell passengers how to keep their arms to themselves instead of encroaching upon other people's space. It should probably include a message about how important personal hygiene is during air travel as well.

And then, on my flight from O'Hare to Los Angeles, a lady sat next to me and couldn't, for the life of her, figure out how to fasten her seatbelt. Seriously? But it gets better. The guy sitting next to me on the flight from LAX to Monterey, sat on his seatbelt, then used mine to fasten himself in nice and snug. It took me ten minutes to explain to him what he'd done.

Remarkably enough, I guess we still need that archaic safety demonstration. (But we maybe we could add the common courtesy and personal hygiene features to it.)


Unknown said...

I can't imagine someone not knowing how to fasten a seat belt. Probably one of those people who always ride in the back seat of a car and don't use one.

April said...

I do believe the apocolypse has hit the Midwest. In Northern Wisconsin the meteorologist said, Hurricane strength winds," "wintery mix", and "snow" within 10 seconds.

Tina said...

Have you seen this singing saftey demonstration? Makes it a little less boring for those who fly alot! ha ha

Gwen said...

LOL! What are the odds that you would meet TWO seat-belt challenged people?!

Unknown said... just crack me up !
Have fun on your mission.
Glad your flight did go as scheduled.
And I agree with the seatbelt thing. Maybe you should contact one of the airlines and get them to change it a bit. I know when I fly no one pays attention anymore.

Donna from NE Indiana

kay.lindsey said...

That happened to me the last time I flew too. Who knew there could be two of such morons? It was like trying to explain to a 2 year old why their dvd won't work in the cd player. I wanted to say "No, sir, I have a seat belt too and you're using it. You're no the only one on the plane so special as to be provided with basic safety devices."

annie said...

Ha ha ha, I too have never understood while they need to show you how to do up the seatbelt, but i guess now we know. You might enjoy this considering the context!
"To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull the belt tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one by now, then you probably shouldn't be allowed out in public unsupervised."
Taken from kulula airlines..


Robin said...

Ya just can't fix stupid. :)

Nat said...

I think you might appreciate these 2 videos:


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