"It's Monday. The kids were home all weekend, so naturally, the house is destroyed. Time to clean. La la la la la, whistle while you work...I'm going to make the beds and straighten up the bedrooms because a clean room is a happy room."
"Time to clean the bathrooms. It's amazing how disgusting those bathtubs can get. How DO those bathtubs get so gross so fast?"
At this point, Brooklyn interrupted me to tell me I wasn't playing the right way. "Mooom, she doesn't clean the bathroom. She puts on makeup to get ready for her date."
"Wow, you really have a good imagination, Brooklyn!" I said, impressed. Then I went back to my way of playing.
"I need to pull the curtains down to wash them since someone didn't want their pasta and ended up flipping her plate against the window while throwing a fit because I dared to feed her something other than chocolate milk and peanut butter."
"Next, it's time to dust the entertainment center, scrub the marker off the TV, and vacuum up the weekend's popcorn extravaganza."
"Oh, I think I hear the kids coming home from school now! Hi guys! How was your day? Do you have any homework?
Great, well you do your homework while I get dinner started."
"Hey kids, dinner's almost.....
.....what on earth have you guys done to the family room?!?!?!"
"Seriously? Seriously??? You've been home for one hour! ONE! Who put the milk by the TV? Why are there cupcakes on the couch? A boogie board? Why in the world did you guys bring the boogie board in here?! Put the kitchen chair back and clean up this mess. NOW!"
"Oh yeah, I love bedtime. Ahhhh, I'd get another rum and Coke, but I'm too tired to get up."
Brooklyn stopped me again. "Moooom, that's NOT how you play dolls! You have to take the kids to Chuck E Cheese. You don't make them clean up. You're not playing right."
Clearly, my kids have better imaginations than I do because no matter how hard I try, I can't fathom putting on makeup, going on a date, and taking my kids to Chuck E Cheese.
But, on the bright side, I think I've gotten out of playing dolls with Brooklyn for a while.