Robin Williams on Speed

LOL! Look at my buddy map at the bottom of this blog! Three days ago it looked like it had the chicken pox with a few scattered red dots. Now it looks like someone shot it and there's blood everywhere! Red dots all over!

I've gotten so much mail and oh my gosh - some of them were so funny, I about wet MY pants! You guys crack me up! I know I said I'd post some of the comments on my blog, but I've received nearly 10,000 emails and honestly don't know where to start! I want to apologize to all of you who have taken the time to write, compliment my writing, share your story, or ask me a question. I just cannot respond to all the mail I'm getting. This will probably all die down in a day or two and then maybe I can get back to all of you. Please don't think I'm ignoring your questions and requests. It's just that I can only read so fast and now and then I have to change a diaper and throw my kids some food. (Notice I didn't say vacuum or dust or anything even remotely related to cleaning?) My house looks like it's been lived in by grizzly bears. Smelly grizzly bears looking for food after hibernation.

Today was the second day of school and ordinarily I'd be ecstatic that the gang is back in school. In fact, I've been known to do a little happy dance of joy on my kitchen table the first day of school. What can I say - some moms meet up for coffee the first day, I dance on my kitchen table. So, usually, I'd be thrilled. Today, however my oldest daughter woke up and said she was too sick to go to school. It's the SECOND day! You can't pull that yet! Not until at least November! (Actually, she does have a sinus infection and an ear infection and I know she wasn't feeling too great.) My oldest son got ready for school like he usually does.
ME: Are your teeth brushed?
AJ: I don't remember.
ME: You don't remember if you brushed your teeth?
AJ: Today?
ME: YES TODAY!
AJ: walking off to brush his teeth
ME: five minutes later Are you ready? Did you brush your teeth? Do you have your backpack? Got your lunch?
AJ: staring at the t.v. which should really never be on in the morning
ME: Hello?
AJ: What?
ME: Are you ready to go?
AJ: Yes.
ME: I look at his feet and notice he doesn't even have shoes on.
I give up. And of course, he forgot his lunch. IT'S THE SECOND DAY! :::sigh:::

Anyway, I got him to school, came home to get the other kids up and going. This is my six year old's first year of going to school all day. She, much like her mother, doesn't do mornings. She slept until 10:00 or 11:00 every day this summer. It's been fun getting her up the past two days. That kid can sleep! It's like she's coming out of anesthesia every morning. My nine year old, on the other hand, jumps out of bed before the sun and is wired for sound. This is my kiddo with ADHD. He takes medication so he can function in school. His teachers love him. And why wouldn't they? They get Dr. Jekyll. I'm left with a veritable Mr. Hyde in the morning before his medicine kicks in and in the evening after it wears off. Actually, he isn't so much like Mr. Hyde as he is like Robin Williams in his Mork days. No, that's not quite right either. More like Robin Williams on speed. Robin Williams in his Mork days on speed. And sugar. And caffeine. Lots and lots of caffeine.

If you're wondering, I've gotten several offers from publishers because of this auction. I've been emailed by people at C-Span, Nickelodeon, a radio station in Tampa, The St. Petersburg Times, Fox 19 Morning News, and several others. Someone asked me to do a podcast. I don't even know what a podcast is! I don't know what to do with all this so I think I'll run away and hide under a rock for a while.

Oh yes - I thought this was starting to die down a bit, but I just checked my stat counter and apparently I've had over 94,000 hits today. I just can't even conceive of a number that large.

OK it's time for me to go to bed and lay there awake all night freaking out about all this attention. Have a good one everyone!

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Addendum: I've been corrected. Knott's Berry Farm is NOT, I repeat NOT in San Diego. Several insulted Californians pointed out my grievous error. :D

Also, a few of you said that you think you went to high school with me. You probably didn't, but that's ok. I always think I went to school with the people in those Classmates.com ads.

Someone just suggested I find a way to use this "fame" and add to my family's income. You have no idea how awesome that would be. Believe me. We live paycheck to paycheck and we're usually a month behind. Kids tend to do that. I don't have the slightest clue how to do this. Anyone? Anyone? Buehler?

Twenty-one More Days! (not that I'm counting)

I went to Target yesterday to buy some diapers and somehow managed to ring up a $100 bill by the time I left. Target does that to me. I go in to buy one thing, but manage to leave with two dozen things that, despite the fact that they weren't on my list, I decided I needed.

So I'm walking up and down the aisles of "Carget", as my 3 year old calls it, and I behold the most glorious sight! The store filled with doves, a choir of angels sang and a light from Heaven shone down illuminating the display of ::::drumroll:::: BACK TO SCHOOL SUPPLIES! Yes, it's almost that most wonderful time of the year and it can't come soon enough. I ran into a teacher friend of mine while at the store and she asked me if I was ready for school. I glanced at my baby trying to stand up in the cart, my 3 year old old running down the aisle laughing like he just broke out of an insane asylum, my 6 year old telling me that she'd somehow broken her glasses again, my 8 year old interrupting me to ask if I'd buy him some baseball cards, my 11 year old chasing my 3 year old in an effort to get him to stop and my 12 year old hitting my 8 year old for no apparent reason. "What do you think?!" I retorted.

She told me that she was definitely not ready for school to begin. Ahhh, there's the difference between parents and teachers. I'm a huge proponent of year round school. The kids attend school the same number of days, but those days are more spread out during the year. The advantage is that the kids' brains don't turn to pudding during the long summer break, teachers don't have to spend the first two months of school reviewing all the things that were sucked out of the kids' memories during the summer, parents and students get more frequent, much needed breaks throughout the year. And although the kids still have a nice summer vacation, they're back in school before the "I'm bored"s set in.

My mother-in-law, who works at a food pantry, called to see if she could borrow my two oldest kids to help her with some volunteer work tomorrow. "I'll pick them up at 8:00 and bring them back around 4:00. Is that ok?"

"Is it ok? Is it ok??? Hell yes! Take 'em for the whole day! Take 'em for two days! In fact, I'll throw in the other four kids as well! No charge!"

I'm looking forward to a little peace tomorrow. And I'm looking forward to a lot of peace in twenty-one days. Oh wait! It's after midnight! Woo Hoo!!! Twenty days!