Monday, February 28, 2011

When I Was Seven. . .

I'm still cracking up over the many artistic masterpieces I created when I was little. Tonight, I'm sharing another gem I found in my box o' greatness from grade school. (Basically because I don't want to write a post about how many times my kids said the phrase, "Shut up!" tonight.)

So, here is a little booklet I made when I was in first grade.



No, I didn't do a bad job drawing my hair. This is what it really looked like.


This was pre-Dorothy Hammill (which really wasn't much of an improvement.) I still think my mom wanted a boy and was determined to make me look like one when I was a kid. But I'm happy as a clam (or a big floating head) with my purple eyes.


"Congratulations, Mrs. Damalas, you've given birth to a creepy old man with red vampire teeth."

I don't know if I really, truly liked my name as a child or if I (most likely) simply didn't follow the directions, and wrote my name twice.


Sigh. Yeah, some things don't change. It would be nice to be 17 and once again know everything.


Yes, I had big green eyes with red lashes, but what I really wanted were tiny pink eyes with red lashes.


Okay, what was this teacher thinking with all these, "I would rather look like this. . ." questions? I wonder how many kids got a complex after completing this assignment. Or maybe she did plastic surgery on the side.


My favorite sound is a chicken??? I was born in Chicago! I don't think I'd ever even heard a chicken when I was 7 years old! This is probably another case of Dawn not paying attention. I probably thought the question was, "What's your favorite food?" Either that, or I was just deranged.


Hmmm, this must have been a short-lived purple phase because my favorite color has always been pink. But let's take a closer look at this picture with the sloppy coloring. . .



Let's see, there's a unicorn, a flying fish, a giant foot with a head and top hat. . . Yep, I think this (along with every Sid and Marty Krofft show) proves that everyone was on acid in the 70s.


That is the worst drawing of The Dukes of Hazzard I've ever seen!

17 comments:

Beth said...

Holy Mackarel! Way to induce self-esteem at a young age! Can you imagine how that teacher would be crucified these days?

Donna said...

Your comments crack me up !
Have you shared all these pictures with your kids ?
I told my kids I got all A's in school.....then going thru my goodie box there were report cards and mine were all checked off as 'she talks too much'. LOL
And no A's or B's on those report cards anywhere so now my kids love to tease me.......

Kim VanDerHoek said...

Your childhood self-portraits are priceless Dawn.

V1nce said...

On closer inspection I don't think you wanted to be named Dawn. There's an angry-looking No before Dawn under I'd like my name to be: No Dawn. Or maybe you were angry at Haidi's name suggestion - No Haidi is possibly writte there too. Or you were talking to yourself No Dawn?

Beth said...

What a wonderful artist you were. What was with that teacher?

Maggie @ SweetwaterBaby said...

Remember those purple Xerox copies??? I don't even remember what that machine was called, but I remember that it SMELLED! And the kids would all smell the paper when we got fresh copies. Or maybe that was just the kids in my class. Copies were the gateway drug...

<3 your blog!

Vivian M said...

Thank you for reminding me why it is so important for me to save my daughter's artwork and school papers! :o)

V1nce said...

My dad had one of those copy machines. Large drum w/chemicals, turn the handle get purple copies - they were called mimeograph machines. Ah, that smell... Dude look at my hand... Pretty colors... *thud* colors..

JMM Haddonfield said...

This made me laugh out loud!! Thanx!!

Kris Roach said...

The assignment starts off all sweet and innocent..."There is only one me....No one in the world is just like me" sounds good so far...then, what the heck!!! These are my eyes but I wish these were my eyes!! and so on and so on, etc. and so on...That teacher would be in deep doody these days, but apparently in the 70's it was okay to destroy a childs self-esteem and to make them wish they could look like someone else....your artwork was cute and your comments hilarious. The whole thing just amazes me though...glad you shared it, it is funny to see how much times have changed!

brent said...

I just bought both your books. Hope I get time to read them. I look forward everyday to an email/blog from you.

Mayberry Mom said...

I was wondering the same thing about the "I wish my ____ looked like this..." pages. What the heck?!

Your comment about your mom giving birth to a creepy old man with vampire teeth cracked me up.

Maggie said, "Copies were the gateway drug..." ROFLOL!!!! I remember those fuzzy purple copies and their unique smell.

MaBunny said...

Love it! That teacher was a bit drastic,lol. I too remember the smell of those copies! The teacher would pass the papers out and kids would smell them before writing their name!

Sherry said...

I laughed out loud at this last comment regarding The Dukes of Hazzard. So funny! Have a great week, Dawn.

My Semblance of Sanity said...

You look like Clayton in a dress!!!

mommeeof10 said...

I remember the mimeograph copies.

Erin said...

I'm pretty sure your teacher photocopied these from a book. I had the book when I was young, it was a hardcover book called something like "All About Me" and you filled it in. I remember these pages!

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