Monday, December 14, 2009

You're Going to Feel a Little Pinch

I went to the dentist today because he told me I had a cavity that needed filled when he cleaned my teeth 6 months ago recently. Because the cavity wasn't enough, I also broke a tooth a couple months ago recently that needed to be fixed as well. My parents aren't exactly the "We haven't seen the grandkids in weeks, can we come over?" type people so I try to refrain from asking them to babysit unless absolutely necessary. For example, a couple weeks ago when I needed to go to the ole gyno for a pap smear, I called them. Somehow, when you put it in that perspective, it doesn't seem so imperative to have a babysitter lined up when you need a filling at the dentist.

I really hate going to my dentist. I mean, I like the dentist as a person and if he was say, my accountant, I'd be delighted to see him, but then again, accountants rarely come at you with 4 foot needles and the lie, "Now you're going to feel a little pinch and some pressure." Pinch and pressure! Yeah right. One of these days, I'm going to reach out and pinch his arm and say, "Now THAT'S a pinch. Jabbing a needle in my MOUTH is not a pinch!"

So, the dentist is drilling away and my skull is vibrating. Literally, little fault lines started cracking open on my skull as he worked on my tooth. At one point, Clay walked over, peered in my open mouth and said something like, "Ewww, why is there blood?" The dentist dismissed him with a, "There's no blood" answer. However, I could see red trickling up the little sucky thing in my mouth. No blood? Well, it isn't cherry Kool Aid! How does a tooth bleed? Does your tooth actually bleed? Or is the blood the result of the swallow factor?

You know what I mean? When the dentist has your mouth pried open, and half a dozen instruments of death are in there along with his hands and you feel this need to swallow, but you don't want to swallow. And the more you try not to swallow, the more you have to swallow until you're consumed with the impossible task of trying not to swallow because you just know that if you give in and swallow, the motion of your jaw is going to send the drill on a trajectory that will cause it to bore into your gums, spewing a river of blood down your throat which will, of course, incite that swallowing reflex yet again. Or maybe it's just me who does that. Hmmm, I should really look into these things, maybe do a little research, or take some surveys, before writing about such stuff and letting the world know just what kind of nonsense goes on in my brain...

Anyway, after the drilling for blood extravaganza, he started to fill my teeth. I don't, quite frankly, know how I even have any tooth left to hold fillings. My teeth are beginning to rot right out of my head. It's only a matter of time until I look like this.


As my dentist was filling my teeth, Brooklyn came over and asked him, "Can I have a napkin?" Yeah, I have no idea why she wanted a napkin. Maybe she was snacking on toothpaste while the dentist had his hands in my mouth and I couldn't watch her. Anyway, she kind of leaves off the "P" when she says the word "napkin" so the dentist didn't understand her. She repeated it. "Can I have a nakin?" Still puzzled, he stared at her. I tried to translate, but since my mouth was numb and presently contained a drill, a sucky thing, a wad of cotton, and 2 hands, it came out like this, "Xhe wancia akin." Oddly enough, the dentist understood that.

On the bright side, the kids were really good. (I had bribed them with gum which, in retrospect, was probably not the best thing with which to bribe them while AT THE DENTIST), but it worked. They spent the whole time playing with their favorite video game system, a.k.a.- mom's phone. And I have a whole 2 weeks now when I can claim to have perfectly wonderful teeth before I go back for my cleaning at which point, he'll tell me I have 3 more cavities...

30 comments:

Amanda said...

I 100% know that swallow factor. Another reason is because if I am bleeding for whatever reason (gums etc), there is no way I want to taste that metallic blood and then swallow it. The whole thing is just awful.

Belinda said...

Kids are a great tool when you are headed for an appointment that may mean you have to wait an hour or more past the appointment to be seen...
I can remember my Mum once got so sick of the speacilist not getting to us until 2 hours past the appointed time... so she just hyped me up on candy and let me run wild in the waiting room. I tell you we were taken in 10 minutes early every time there after.
Belinda
Brisbane Australia

Frau Mahlzahn said...

Uaaah -- dentists. Awful. (Although my dentist is rather good looking -- but he is also so much younger than I am, that there is no use in trying to flirt, *ggg*).

So I take it, you either didn't ask your parents to babysit or they didn't have the time to come. How are things going in your family anyway, are they still upset with you? (Hope you don't mind my asking, if you do, please erase the comment).

So long,
Corinna

Anonymous said...

Oh Dawn I feel your dentist pain. I have a horrible phobia about it. When my kids were young, my hygentist suggested that I should have my husband take the kids because they would sense my fear...kind of like that giant horse knows you are afraid of it and will throw you everytime. So, because of dental insurance, I had to switch dentists. Turns out the new guy, who by the way is also nice, but a bit weird, insists I take Valium before I visit because seems I don't breath while I am in the chair. Yup, the valium works like a charm! Modern chemistry is the only way to go!

Always April said...

My husband is a dentist and done work on me and when he gives the injection it is not as bad as when some other dentist do it. The blood is normal. It means the tooth is still alive.

Anonymous said...

I so understand your comment about your teeth rotting out of your head. I am having the same problem. Somewhere in my 30's my teeth suddenly decided to give out on me. I recently lost a LARGE, old filling & when I went in to have it replaced-the decay had gone too far & now I have to have a root canal & a cap. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME!!!!!

Michelle in PA

Donna said...

Oh Dawn......I feel the same way and I have a really bad tooth and keep putting it off to see my dentist. They just know me by my phone call saying 'Help'. LOL
He is great as I am the worst baby about having work done.
My problem stems for my youth when we had a horrible mean dentist.

Hope everything went well for you.

Susie said...

Thats so funny. I went to the dentist last week and was thinking the same thing "try not to swallow, try not to swallow but wait i need to swallow. its killing me, i have to swallow, but he is going to cut me if i swallow...." never ending cycle

utmomof 5 said...

I feel the same way about my dentist. And the swallowing thing...you are not alone. It may just be me and you who feel that way but we are not alone!!!

Jill said...

I also just went to the dentist to have cavities filled (yes, plural) and my dentist has the latest technology, I didn't even feel the novicain injection! It was wonderful!
Also, is the Ice Cream magnet on your "fridge" new?

Rachel Tramontana said...

Hey Dawn, this is a question totally unrelated to this post but I was just wondering your thoughts on this (maybe you can do a post to get some discussion going.) We have 5 kids ... 3 under 5 and then my husband has two older kids from his first marriage (they're 14 and 18.) It seems like every year we sink farther into debt over Xmas presents - we've spent a little more than 1600$ on JUST the five of them. Do you abide by a limit - do you tell your kids what that limit is? How do you come up with that limit? I know you can't discuss that with the younger ones, but for the older ones who are wanting more expensive things (my 14 year old stepson wanted either an iPod touch or a PS3) what do you think is a normal "amount" to spend on Christmas presents? Do you base it on your salary? If so, do you feel you have to "top" it each year (I feel like this is what my husband thinks he has to do. We spent about 250 on each kid last year, this year it's well over 300 each.) And it's the same for birthdays - it's more than 100$ for each kid on their birthday now. It just seems to me like we're making it too "easy" on kids by letting them have this ridiculously expensive stuff. It just seems like any "meaning" goes away because on Christmas morning all I'm doing while everyone is opening up their presents is adding up in my head what we're going to owe the credit card company. I'd be curious as to yours and other people's thoughts on what they do for Christmas.

Teashop Girl said...

I had three cavities filled this month. Not fun at all. I sure hope I get a clean bill of tooth health when I go back next summer, because my poor mouth can't take much more (not to mention my poor wallet).

Anonymous said...

I'm completely with you, Dawn! At least worrying about the swallowing takes your mind off the fact that there's a DRILL in your mouth!

I just went to the oral surgeon last night because my dentist wants me to have one of my wisdom teeth pulled. I've held onto them for all these years and NOW I have to lose them?? I lost a really big filling in that tooth TWO DAYS after my last cleaning. I never called the dentist because I couldn't see where it came from and it didn't bother me. At my next cleaning they were wondering if I knew I lost a filling. "Hmmm, did I? I didn't notice anything wrong." Now I need the darn tooth pulled. First thing I told the surgeon -- "You'd better be sure I'm completely asleep or you'll have a crazy woman on your hands." She offered me Valium. Pretty funny. I'll take BOTH, please! ;o)

Donna in PA :)

ummmhello said...

1) I have the same swallow/don't swallow for fear of death by drill thing going on when I'm at the dentist.
2) My dentist is also a great guy ECXEPT for his streak of masochism aka dentistry stuff.
3) OF COURSE the dentist understood your translation of Brooklyn's question. It's like a different dialect to them....odd, but understandable! :)

Robin said...

You deserve a (sugar-free) sucker for being a good girl at the dentist! : ) Or maybe a new pair of shoes instead...whatever.

Liz's Random Thoughts said...

Is this the time to bring up that a dentist in my small town a few years ago was arrested for murdering his own wife...? ;-)

Anonymous said...

I am a jittery dental patient who also feels the urge to swallow and swallow and swallow while the drilling is going on. A tiny dose of valium (2 milligrams) relaxes me and also reduces the amount of saliva produced. My wonderful dentist, who is also my son, clued me in about the saliva part.

Missi said...

I don't have swallowing issues but instead I always get a tickle on my nose or feel the uncontrolable need to cough. I guess I was so nose wrinkly last cleaning my hyngentist just reached up w/ the back of her hand & brushed my nose, then asked if it was better. LOL My kids have cleanings next Tues........they so can't wait...........total lie!!! My husband broke a tooth 2 years ago & just told me. It's now causing him pain, but he still refuses to go to the dentist.......men! I told him it'll get so bad over Christmas & ruin the holiday for him or wait till a business trip he has out of state in Jan & get really bad that week he's out of town.

MPMommy said...

My Mom says there's only a 50 year (give or take 5 years) warranty on teeth. :)

Mandy said...

!!!GROAN!!! Gotta love the dentist!

Melissa said...

I don't like the dentist either. And for some odd reason, as I was reading this, I could literally feel my jaws vibrating as if I were getting dental work. Oh my!

Merrie said...

I could have written this post tonight. Seriously -- the pinch, the filling, the drilling, the vibrating, the many instruments in my mouth. That was me from 5pm to 6:05 this evening. I don't remember a filling ever taking so long! I feel your pain.

Gail said...

I agree, Dentisits scare me too. Just the thought of all the money I have to pay-same as you-I'm at the point where all the fillings need to be replaced with crowns ! Cha-ching !

Have you ever thought of being a speaker at Women of Faith? Check it out, it's a fabulous time. Anita Renfroe was there this year, hilarious (sp?).

Are you seperated from your husband? I noticied he's not in the pictures anymore.

Blessings,
Gail

MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

I know that was painful but I really loved this line, it was quite poetic:

"And the more you try not to swallow, the more you have to swallow until you're consumed with the impossible task of trying not to swallow because you just know that if you give in and swallow, the motion of your jaw is going to send the drill on a trajectory that will cause it to bore into your gums, spewing a river of blood down your throat which will, of course, incite that swallowing reflex yet again."

Cindi said...

So funny about the swallowing issue at the dentist! I totally do that! I hold out swallowing as long as I can but then you start to drool and gag. UGH, how I hate the dentist!

Deana said...

I can SO relate to this. I am forever avoiding the dentist.

Chick Hatchers said...

That picture is not anything to laugh at - how did you get a picture of ME and why are you using it on your blog making fun of my teeth? Hey, I paid a lot of money for those few teeth I have left! ;)

(I just couldn't resist. Some ole fella out there just might stumble across his picture on your blog and think those exact thoughts.)

mychildsview.blogspot.com

valkyrie_lisa said...

I have that swallowing problem. It's made worse by the fact that, if I don't swallow, I'm soon making this horrible snoring/gurgling noise because my mouth is so wide open that I can't completely close off my throat. I hate that! I have a good friend who's my dentist, and I still avoid going!

Donna Mc said...

Oh Boy can I relate. I've been to the dentist almost constantly since August. One thing after another. Last week I spent 3 hours tilted practically on my head while he complained about my 'small mouth' while trying to put a crown in the FAR back/bottom. It was insane. He then gave me a Rx for something to dry my mouth out before my next appt. Apparently I'm also 'Juicy Lucy!'
So all in all...I'm getting a 2 crowns & a bridge for Christmas. *sigh*

Michelle said...

You need to find a dentist who does the sonic fillings. OR something like that. Something about a light or laser or something but no pain and no drilling -- or so I've been told. I somehow have evaded the nightmare of a cavity to date (knock on wood).

Oh -- and the gum? Don't you remember the whole dentist tv commercial about how Trident helps teeth? Just tell the dentist they were chewing Trident....

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