Sunday, December 21, 2008

The Purse Dump

The other day I Twittered, "If your purse weighs more than your toddler and it takes you 20 mins. to find your library card, you may need to clean it out."

Clisty wrote back, "Dawn I challenge you to a purse dump blog post."

So, here it is. It isn't pretty. Parental guidance is suggested. You may have to avert your eyes at times.


No normal sized purse for me thankyouverymuch.


I put my purse on the scale to weigh it first. 9.8 pounds. OK, so it doesn't weigh as much as my toddler, but it's close.


Let the dumping begin.


a container of diapers and wipes - normal and necessary


pics of the kiddos - what any good mom should have in their purse


Jackson's CD - I'm not sure why this is in my purse...


a book, stamps, my wallet and Jackson's wallet - I'm sure I have a perfectly good reason for having his wallet in my purse.


Jackson's old eyeglass case - It's empty. I have no clue why it's in my purse, but it might come in handy one day. You know, if I get a new pair of glasses. And they forget to give me a case for them.


a case of business cards, my memory card adapter thingy and my headphones


misc. cards - some are business cards, some are rewards cards, some are gift cards. I'm pretty sure I've never used the one for the fabric store. Ever.


Well, look at that. I have 3 Lego cards. You know why? Because every time I go to a Lego store, I can't find my punch card, so they give me a new one. Each one has 3 or 4 stamps in it.


Shhhh, don't tell my dentist about all the gum.


Ummm, a couple batteries and a luggage lock. I lost the key to the lock on my way home from Sonoma because I left the key dangling from the lock when I checked my luggage. I still have the lock because I'm pretty sure the airline is going to call me any day now and say, "We found a key to a lock and we're pretty sure it belongs to you, Mrs. Meehan." And the batteries are in my purse because - well, you just never know when you're going to need them.


Here we have half a tomato, a fairy and an ant. All reasonable things to carry in a purse.


My phone, my bluetooth Jawbone, and my Flip (because you just never know when someone like Ty Pennington might walk by and that's the kind of thing you want to get on film, my friends.)


These are some segments Jackson earned when he was in Cub Scouts. He hasn't been in Cub Scouts for 2 years. I'm going to sew them on his vest any day now.


My books are on here. Well, actually I need to update this because if my computer crashes, I'll lose about 10,000 from my second book.


a little plastic pizza - you know, in case someone gets hungry.


Jackson's DS game. Sigh, ok, I'm running out of excuses for having all this stuff in my purse.


a bunch of coupons and stuff


Yes, there are 15 coupons for Bed, Bath & Beyond. One of these days I'm going to use them. Yes I am.


2008 calendar, 2009-10 calendar, a book about Wings women's shelter, and my book because you just never know when an opportunity will arise for you to whip out your book and make a fool of yourself to a complete stranger.


8 pens - more than half of these were umm borrowed from hotels. What?! They're just pens. At least I didn't pull a Ross and take the salt from the shakers!


One of the kids' notebooks full of interesting drawings.


a paper which had an important phone number on it. Clay got ahold of it and now it has an important phone number on one side and CLAYTON written on the other.


a receipt from my train ride last week


A gum wrapper. Hey, you never know when you might need to spit out a piece of gum. Eventually gum loses flavor and you must discard it. Well, where are you going to spit it? Into the wrapper, of course!


Ahhh yes, the compact I got when I went to Johnson & Johnson's Camp Baby last year. Yes, it does really say, "What's happening down there? Let's talk about bladder prolapse." I remember this talk well. I think it began something like this...
"Do you ever leak urine when you sneeze? How about when you laugh?"
At this point, I started cracking up (and of course, had to excuse myself to use the bathroom.)


These are ear drops from when Clay and Lexi had tubes put in their ears over a year ago.


misc. stuff - epi-pen (I think this can be packed away since bees aren't prevalent in DECEMBER!), nail polish, several bottles of lotion, rubber bands, Advil, perfume, tissues, Dentabursts, rice paper, tampon, SpongeBob bandaid, you know - the usual stuff you need in a purse


9 things of lipstick/gloss/chapstick. What?! I believe in the Boy Scout motto - BE PREPARED! You never know when you might need to regloss.

I'd like to clean out my purse, but really I can't think of a single thing that I can take out. I mean, I only have the absolute essentials in my purse.

I know! I'll just get a bigger purse and I'll be set!

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49 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my, that was one heavy and full purse! Mine was like that, and then one day (while watching Gilmore Girls) I had an apifany: I took all of my misc stuff, like lipgloss, allergy spray, painkillers, tampons etc and put in one of those little bags you have your toiletrys in while you travel (don't know the english word for it obviously). Of course I hade to get a new bag while buying the small one, you can't start a new purse-life with an old bag. So I still have a lot of misc stuff in my bag, but it's contained to one place. I think that should earn me some points on the adultscale, don't you? Merry christmas!

Unknown said...

All I have to say is:

Will you pack my suitcase for me???

I can't get all that stuff in even my big suitcase - I must be doing it wrong.

Janice (5 Minutes for Mom) said...

Wow - girl. That is some serious baggage there.

But you know, I am all about carrying enough to survive an emergency - and as parents that is a daily reality.

BTW - I want to review that book!!!!

Lastel said...

You might need one with wheels ! Mine is pretty heavy too , I agree , you have got to be prepared ...lol !

Alexis AKA MOM said...

The Great thing about Bed, Bath and Beyond is you can take an old coupon of theirs and they'll let you use it. I always keep one in the purse, that way you don't lug around 15 of them :). Don't worry a worker told me about this too, since one day I dug thru my purse to find the non-expired one.

Anonymous said...

I have that same blue wallet!

Anonymous said...

I have that pizza, but it's not in my purse. We must have the same dollhouse. I have a small purse, which I put into a big canvas bag with a book, some paperwork, sometimes my camera, the kids hats, sunglasses, light jackets, etc. But, see, it's not a PURSE, it's a bag for carrying stuff. My PURSE is small. You believe me, right?

Jennifer said...

I know you are telling the truth, but something is blocking me from actually seriously believing that you had all of that in there. Your poor neck and shoulder.

Anonymous said...

Only one of those patches could be from Cub Scouts - the yellow/gold arrow point. Was he in Cubs or Awana? The other patch is not Cub Scout related, and Cub Scouts don't wear vests. :-)

~ an Eagle Scout Mom

Kim said...

You seriously need a card cubby! Go to cardcubby.com and look. I don't work for them or get any compensation for it, but now I can always find my library card, my Sam's card, my Target gift card, etc! You could put your Lego cards under L!

Anonymous said...

Hey Dawn,

If you put the tampon in the empty glasses case, it won't get crushed.

Just sayin'.

Wendi said...

I love it when you make fun of yourself. :) My purse is actually organized, but I just have two kids and am not writing books in my spare time. I need to dump my BEDROOM--unfortunately, it's the catch-all in our house. Thanks for the highly entertaining post. :)

Kyddryn said...

Wow...

I don't carry a purse, so everything has to either clip to a belt loop (car keys) or fit in my pockets (wallet, card case, two Burt's Bees Lip Shimmers - one Watermelon, one Guava, and a tiny pocket knife that may look small but it mighty useful).

I think purses give of a pheromone or a signal or have increased gravity that attracts random odd objects and sinks them to the bottom, especially if they are pointy and sticky and you need to dig around in there for something.

Shade and Sweetwater,
K (who may actually drive her purse - you've never seen the inside of her van!)

Anonymous said...

What happened to your Coach purse? Did you actually send it back to be fixed?

I can't believe all of the stuff you have in there (although I do have a similar number of packs of gum, since my kids only like one kind and I have to have grownup flavors). But seriously, how do you not have back problems carrying all that around? Especially in Chicagoland, where you have to wear a winter coat, how does it even fit on your shoulder? I can't stand trying to fit a purse over my puffy coat sleeve! Do I sense a New Year's resolution coming on? Nah, you'd lose valuable blog fodder, and we can't have that now, can we? Thanks for making me smile on a dreary blizzardy morning in the East!

~Laura

dragonfly domain said...

LOL.... this is why I changed to only having a walet the size of a creadit card as soon as my yougest was out of dipers. ;)
My back has been SO much better.
Jenn

Anonymous said...

9.8 Pounds? Wow! I think you should tell your doctor that you exercise every time you go out. :)

To put it in perspective, a typical gallon of whole milk weights around 8.6 pounds.

Six-Pack Momma said...

I fell much better knowing I'm not the only one! BTW, I was at Bed Bath and Beyond the other night, and there was a sign that read: "Beginning January 26, 2009. we will no longer accept coupons past the expiration date." WHAT? You mean I can use expired coupons? I had no idea! I just threw away a whole pile of 'em! So you'd better hurry!

Patois42 said...

Wow! I cannot believe you don't have body aches from carrying all that stuff around.

Jen said...

Maybe you should get Jackson a purse for Christmas. It seems like most of the unnecessary weight came from him. I'm sure he'd appreciate it! =)

Anonymous said...

I would keep the epi pen. Much as you forgot to take it out, likely you'll forget to put it back in in a few months' time. I mean, now that you've cleaned out your purse, you're not going to bother with it for a year or two, right?

And only one gum wrapper? Lucky you. When I clean out my purse (cursory monthly clean of just the outside pocket), I find almost ten per pass. Why yes, I do buy gum in bulk, why do you ask?

Gothic ʚϊɞ said...

Thank you dawn, my purse is probably the same so now I don't feel so bad. Course I don't have a "whats going on down there" compact, but I will just have to deal with the loss lol.

Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] said...

You were right.

Frightening.

And all those BB&B coupons? In your purse? Those things are HEAVY! Keep them in your car. Just a tip.

Anonymous said...

My son JD is obessed with my purse. The other day he disovered the sticky wonder of my lip gloss when I was checking email. AH! Luckily everything in there is safe! Well, if you count organic cherry lip stuff as babe-proof. I do--sort of!

http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/storked/

Best,

Christine from Glamour mag

Tammy said...

Don't worry about the gum. Our son's pediatric dentist said Orbit is the only gum she recommends. It actually can help prevent cavities. And last time I cleaned out my purse, I found a screw driver. DH said HE didn't want to have to carry it. ?

mommeeof10 said...

Somehow I've eneded up with 3 hair brushes in my backpack that I carry to work. I left one in my desk at work and will bring my girls brushes back home.

I do not have a lot of unnecessary stuff in my backpack/purse. Only because my 2 yr old dumped it all over the dining room the other day and I only got the essentials back in it. You know, the epi pen (peanut allergies), allergy medicines, prenatal vitamins, wallet, keys, badges for work, hat and mittens, the hat I am knitting and a book, plus the containers from my lunch that I need to bring home and wash.

Anonymous said...

My purse is often so full, I can barely carry it. I have become a human pack mule. On any given trip (to the store, haunted maze, beach...) everything goes into Mom's bag. One fine evening, 4 of us were going to the corn mazes and of course 4 flashlight (for tag) were in my bag. I put it on the back of my chair at the restaurant/pub we were eating in, attempted to sit down, pushing it back from the table. Down I went, a** over teakettle, with the chair behind me. And my lovely children couldn't have laughed harder! My husband was stunned into inaction. Fortunately, there was a decent man sitting behind me and helped me up. Too much!

Anonymous said...

I have a plan for you to consider. I still carry a lot of junk around with me but this works!

I have a brief case - the sort which opens like a small suitcase, and in that I carry "my life". Driving license, cheque book, stamps, pens, paperwork for my job,etc. etc.

BUT my "piece de resistence" is that I also have inside a Radley (yes - thank you adult son) messenger bag which also contains my wallet, coin purse, ciggies and lighter.(No lectures on smoking cos I have heard them all!).

So the plan is that you keep the brief case in the car but take out the small and much more convenient bag when you stop somewhere, like the bank, or supermarket. It works for me!!

p.s. I also always carry in my car my overnight bag already packed with essentials for those unexpected stop-overs.

Dont think I am a totally organised person cos I am not. My study has piles of paperwork waiting to be filed, the laundry basket has elves which fill it up at night, and my wardrobe screams to be sorted. But lugging around a 9 pound bag just isnt good for you!

A&EMom said...

I opened my purse this morning in church and found a pair of pantyhose. Luckily, I know where they came from :)

Rice paper?

Donna said...

All I can say is "Oh My! What a purse!"

Feisty Irish Wench said...

My purse is way too full also. I keep downsizing it but things find their way into the recesses of it. Now it weighs probably close to 9 pounds too. And the seal on the straps has disintegrated, exposing the edges, resulting in the handles shedding thread and now they're cracking. I love my purse, but maybe I'm just looking for an excuse to get a new one?

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn!

Great purse sortation process. You may want to reconsider empyting it out though. At a bridal shower I went to one of the games played involved finding obscure objects in our purses. I'm thinking you would have won hands-down. At the shower, there was a tie which was broken by the gal who had the most change - $17!!

Sandy in Tucson

SassyScrap said...

Goodness - that's a lot of stuff! Your post reminds me of one of the most endearing moments I've ever seen from a First Lady. Years ago Barbara Bush was visiting a school and she was taking questions from the kids. One of them asked her what was in her purse and she proceeded to empty the contents of her purse IN FRONT OF LIVE PRESS and show everyone. That is one cool lady... But a nine pound purse is terrible for your back, let alone your posture! I mean, you're probably an inch taller when you're not lugging around a kid on one hip and that purse on the other. Thanks for sharing what's in the "black hole!"

SassyScrap said...

I just wanted to say in response to the Eagle Scount Mom that Scouts DO wear vests and you can (or could) purchase them online through the Scout site. We have a red felt vest in which all of our patches are adhered (you can use fabric glue Dawn - no sewing!). Maybe some packs don't allow them? Ours does so don't feel like you've lost your mind on that one!

Brenda said...

That purse must be big as a buick! Mine is always full of receipts. It is a paper trap!

Kathy said...

LOL I can soo relate to you purse...especially all the pens AND the lipsticks!!! I was at a Candle Party and they had the purse game. I won the most coupons for the number of lipsticks I had....I believe I had 19!!

Shasha said...

Hey Dawn, I read on your Twitter updates that you were smiling at everyone today! Yay! I did this as well, even though it was 32 in North Texas and I sat 4 hours at NTB to get an oil change and brakes put on the car, I still smiled at everyone, even at walmart where I went to do some last minute shopping and it was PACKED! Anyhow, hope you got some things done today.

Shellie said...

Just love the what's happening down there button. Too funny. The rest? Totally normal. Don't you need a stretchy toy lizard held together in the middle by a screw, too? I have one I could share with you.

Anonymous said...

OMG, that's insane!

Veggiemomof2 said...

It's ok, that gum is sugar free! :)

Jacque said...

I can't believe all that weighed only 9 lbs.! Amazing. You're the kind of friend I like to have with me when I need something!

Lisa Noel said...

Love the purse dump, I do it almost weekly and it can still be this bad and I am SURE that I've hit the 10 pound mark easily. $10 in arcade tokens adds weight fast

Michelle said...

Oh I love these posts. And I feel like I could never live up to them because I purposely carry a tiny purse... but I'm always amazed by all the CRAP I have in my purse :)

Oh, and Little Miss is also on the Ciprodex right now for her first post tube removal ear infection. "nothankyounothankyounothankyounothankyou" is all I hear from her for the five minutes it takes to put in ten stupid drops.

I do love how all your photos are of all your kids AND appear to be up to date!

Cookie said...

OMG! That looks a lot like the inside of my purse :S

Karrie said...

I could really use some of those Bed Bath and Beyond coupons. That is my favorite store! I signed up to get on their mailing list but have yet to receive a coupon....

JennyF said...

Thanks for being brave enough to share. My purse is getting so bulky I can't get my wallet in and out with ease any more -- I may have to do the same thing!

Michelle said...

I'll take the card for the fabric store!!! Wanna mail it to me?


...I'm serious.

Anonymous said...

I'm terribly amused that only 1 person commented on "Rice Paper" ... lol
~Erica

Insanitykim said...

That was amazing. I want to look again, and again, and again...

BloggessJ said...

Wow! I wonder what I'll find when I clean out my purse!?

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