Wednesday, April 9, 2008

This is the School Nurse...

I got a call from the school nurse today. I'm on her speed dial. She informed me that Jackson had bumped into someone at recess and had a nasty contusion (that's bruise to you and me) on his cheek. I said something along the lines of, "Oh thanks for letting me know. I'll take a look when he gets home." She was really concerned about his cheek and wanted me to come get him from school.

OK, so I loaded up the little ones and headed to school. Remember my rant about visitor parking spots being taken up by faculty and staff? Well, they took care of that. Want to know how? Instead of making the staff park in the staff lot and enforcing the rule, they simply painted over the "visitor" sign on the parking spots, so now they technically aren't parking in visitor spaces, because there aren't any visitor spaces! Well, they left 2 spots, but that's it. Meanwhile, the staff lot sits half-empty. I just have to roll my eyes at that. Pathetic.

Anyway, I took one look at Jackson and said something like, "Sheesh! You've got yourself a black eye already? You haven't even had your first baseball game!" It really wasn't his eye, but his cheekbone right under his eye. It was swollen and purple. But still, it was just a bump under his eye. I think the nurse, who I actually like a lot, wanted me to take him home and bring him to the doctor. Because I'm such a wonderfully sensitive, compassionate mom, I told him something like, "Suck it up. It's a black eye. Go back to class." "Aw does it hurt much, Sweetie? Do you think you can make it another hour?"

It really wasn't that bad and Jackson wasn't even complaining about it. Still, you know how black eyes go...it'll look a lot worse before it gets better.

Then I came home and made a cake for the kids. Clay stood on the chair, like he always does when I bake anything, and asked me if he could help.
"Sure! You can put this flour in the mixer," I told him as I handed him the measuring cup.
He looked dubious and said, "Mom, [duh] don't you remember what happened last time?"
I about fell over laughing. How did he remember that? And how did he develop those perfect teenage "Duh" mannerisms?




We had our dress rehearsal tonight. Whaddaya think? Yes, I'm playing a dumb blond. It's not a far stretch for me. Oh man, that wig is so tight and hot and itchy. Boy, will I breath a sigh of relief when the play's over.

57 comments:

Lynn said...

Wow! All I can say is if you ever witness a crime you could go into witness protection as a blond and they'd never find you! You look so different!

BoufMom9 said...

Looking SEXY Dawn! Love the color!
PS Why are wigs so darn itchy???

BTW I must admit, I am a mean mom too. When the nurse calls, I am definitely known for telling my kids to suck it up and stay there. LOL

MPMommy said...

I have a 2 year old, and I'm always amazed at what she remembers. We've told her once or twice that wine is not for babies and if you pretend to offer her some, she says, "Not for babies!" yet how many 100's of times a day do I tell her not to stick her fingers in her 4 month old sister's eyes, yet she continues to do it. Daily. Kids are funny.

nomi said...

Holy sexy mama! You look good as a dumb blond ;-) ha ha!

Anonymous said...

You look nice as a blonde. I have a question for you: why won't BlogHer let you blog about your trip here? What is BlogHer exactly, and what are the benefits of being a part of it? Thanks in advance!

Jen said...

I adore you! You are such an awesome Mommy and get through it all with a sense of humor. I want to be you when I grow up!!!

nutralady2001 said...

Hey Dawn you're cute!!!

Oh I remember those schoolyard accidents. Mr 32 is my ADHD child. When he was about 14 I went to pick him up after school one day. A child came racing over and asked "Are you Ben's Mum ?"........"Yes".......and the answer was "Ben's had an accident" So I glibly said "Ben's always having accidents " with a roll of my eyes. Then I was informed that this was a "big messy one"

A nano-second before I arrived Ben had been swinging from the roof struts of the shelter shed, had fallen and broken his glasses into a gazillion pieces and cut above his eye.There was blood everywhere (tell your children not to have these types of accidents when they are wearing white school shirts or white anything for that matter) and he was hysterical

That was a " 7 stitches just below the eyebrow" job

For about the next 10 years his brother and sister (he was a bit older than them) had to endure the lecture at the first school assembly of the year about not swinging from the roof rafters and " ending up falling like Ben (surname)"

Annjanette said...

I thought it was Savannah or Lexi at first glance!

Tazz said...

Very nice wig! You look so different, wonder if that'll work with us old grammas?

Be thankful you have a nurse that calls! My grandsons schoold nurse sends a note home for everything from bruises to lice. I'm convinced she would send a note home telling us if he needed to be taken to the hospital telling us which room he was in. Problem is she often leaves details out, so she would probably forget to tell us which hospital!

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

I can't believe the nurse made you come in for that bruise. I so would have told her that I'd make an appointment for him (yeah, right) directly after school.

Mabunny said...

wow, that really is BLOND!! Looks ok, but I like you better brunette:)) anyway , hope Jacksons cheek/eye gets better.
Have a great day. and with all yourfunny stories. do you happen tohave one aboutweddings that you would like to enter in my contest? It is to celebrate my 100th post.
Hope to see you there!
Have a great day. When doese the play open?

Kittilicious said...

Ha ha~! I love it when they call because they bumped their head and they call it a "head injury".
I got a call a month or so ago that my little demon was running a slight fever and wanted to come home... my initial reaction was to say "can't you just give her a cool washcloth and send her home with all the other kids?"... but yet, as the good moms that we are... we do what we are supposed to do.

Go get them from school, throw a cool washcloth on their head and tell them to stay on the couch because they are sick and they are only allowed to watch the news because they aren't skipping school to watch SpongeBob!

Jari said...

Dawn, look at you lady!!! One Hot Mama there :)

At least your kids school HAS visitor parking. Or, had rather. My son's school has about 15 spaces in front of the school, and none of them are ever empty for the same reason. Instead, parents end up parking in a little gravel 'over flow' "lot". Why bother to build a visitor section if the employees are going to take it over?

Brenda said...

I was on the nurse speed dial when mine were little too. Mine were generally actually sick though. Not just an owwy. Is that the correct spelling of owwy? I bet your husband likes the blond wig.

little.birdy said...

Why don't you just park in the staff places? I mean, how are they going to know? If someone calls you out on it you can simply tell them that your kid was hurt and you needed to deal with it and there aren't any visitor parking places.

Sherry said...

Wow, I didn't even recognize you. Maybe you shouldn't have posted that picture. You might need that wig to escape the papparazzi (sp?) some day since you are becoming so famous. ;)
About the black eye - no pics? Actually, my brother got a concussion once and his bruise was on his cheek (for about 3 months), so maybe the nurse is thinking more about his brain than the bruise. Just a thought.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I can't believe then nurse wanted you to come when there was no blood or potruding bones. She must not have any kids herself!

Becky in Wyo said...

You know, you are going to have the greatest collection of stories to reminisce about when your kids are grown up. Family gatherings will always be full of laughter, recalling all the crazy things that everyone did, and that happened to you.

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn, Love the wig on you! I have a few wigs that I wear just for fun. It is nice to play a different person every once in awhile. I have pictures of about 20 people wearing my wig at a party we had last summer. Even one of the dog in it. Good times Good times. Kristine in Michigan.

Raising Country Kids said...

I've used the "suck it up" method a few times with my first grade drama queen daughter. Her teacher recently went on maternity leave, and the sub probably thinks I'm awful because I didn't come get her the other day when she called. Mama's instincts are almost always right in these matters. Hope he heals quickly!

Michelle said...

Just a thought .... wear it home and see what Joe says. I think you'd look awesome as a redhead. It may be fun for Joe (and you if the itchiness isn't too big a factor.

Amanda said...

WOW! I think you should seriously consider getting a haircut like that - short and blonde. You look GREAT!!!!

andramorphew said...

You look really great as a blond - I am also a brunette and have always wondered what it would be like to go blond for a day. It works for you! Good luck on your play.

C-Rah said...

Blonde looks good on you!

Georgetta Nextdoor said...

I love the wig! When your book is published and you have paparazzi following you, you can use the wig as part of your disguise... :)

Sheila said...

The blonde looks great!

At least the nurse called you, though. We once received a phone call that my daughter had been "run over" by a big kid in the hall and had cut her chin, but she had stopped crying and not to worry.

My husband is a pediatrician, and he happened to be home for lunch, and he thought we should go take a look.

So we went to the school. He took one look at her and took her to Emergency.

Six stitches later we emerged. No big deal indeed!

Anyway, that's the one and only time she's ever been at the hospital.

Visit To Love, Honor and Vacuum today!

Shannon B. said...

My mom probably would have gotten me if I said I was really embarrassed by the bruise and begged her, but if the school nurse called she would have told me to go on to class. The school nurse probably was just covering her bases in case she got fingered for letting your kid go back to class.

Love the old blog post about the mixer, it's amazing what kids will remember :D

Also, LOVE the blonde wig, very snexy mom!

Julie said...

LOL how funny, just yesterday I told my oldest to suck it up when she was complaining :O)

SAHM: Surviving Assorted Home Mayhem said...

Okay Dawn, you fooled me with the wig--I saw the pic before reading the post and was actually suprised it was you! Oh, and I can relate to the bump/bruise--Monday the little one fell off his little chair [by goofing around, not sitting of course] and conked his head but good -darn wood floors! He's actually fine but boy is that a bump! Poor thing.

Anonymous said...

Woohoo Dawn you look hot in that wig! Better not bring that thing home or you might end up doing a mom2my7pack blog!

Aemelia (not even bothering to try to add my name anymore)

kathi d said...

We have a friend who is a well-respected doctor. When his son was 12 or so, he had an accident on the soccer field and was on the ground yelping in pain. The dad told him something dadly like "Shake it off!"

Turned out the kid's femur was broken clean through. Oops!

amy said...

Last Tuesday I got a call from Mother's Day Out at our church. It was 9:30 AM I had dropped him (5 yr old) off 30 minutes ago. Well there had been an accident and he was crying really hard and his foot was a little swollen. I said " oh just give him some Motrin and ice his foot. If it gets worse call me" I never got another call, so I picked him up that afternoon. He was limping some, so I called the Dr. We go and see the Doctor at 4:00. Dr say's he does not think it is broken , so lets just get an x-ray in the morning to check it out. Well we go for x-ray and guess what 3 broken metatarsals. So a cast for 3 weeks for a very active 5 yr old boy!!!- I will not live down "just give him some Mortin" (and suck it up!!) :)LOL

Franzi said...

wow, you look a lot different with the wig! what does joe say to this??? ;-)

Becky said...

Are you planning on putting a video clip of your part in the play on your blog?

Kaci said...

You look cute!! :) Good luck with the play!

Jules said...

Oooo........purdy blond.
And isn't it wonderful to know that a few well placed words to the school authorities can work wonders?
(Picture me saying this with sarcasm, lots of sarcasm.)

Anonymous said...

Wow, you look so skinny in that picture! Maybe I need to go blonde :) At least your school has a nurse. Here in Utah we have a nurse that covers 6-8 schools. We used to joke that kids can only get sick/hurt on Wednesdays between 1:15 and 2:45!

Kel Miller said...

Your "what's up with the diet??" readers might be interested in this article-- http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7340426.stm

It's hard proof of what additives do to kids; Europe is considering banning colorants.

-Kel

p.s. You make a good blonde!

Sue said...

So cute!

Break a leg!

Roni said...

I must say You do look good with hair like that.. and it appears it may be easy to take care of... no curling iron etc etc lol. I am an advid reading of you blog. I know I dont comment to much, but I do check it everyday.
I also tagged you from my blog.

Mama said...

I was going to comment on the day you blogged about little B and "totally wicked" but with nearly 300 comments I figured you wouldn't notice it. Since there are only 35 while I'm posting this, my question is "Has Brooklyn been watch The Incredibles lately?"

Oh & don't worry about her attire. Mine came out of his brother's bedroom the other day in his T-shirt, one cowboy boot, one croc and no diaper. When I chased after him to get a diaper on him and find the one he took off, I noticed a brown blob hanging from Mr. Cracky . . . nice

Courtney said...

Dawn, you are not a mean mom. One day I had one of those wooden podiums fall on my leg (those suckers are heavy) needless to say my leg had 7 huge bruises the size of a gallon milk jug. My dad came to school and told me I was still walking (barely) and that he would see me after school. I was not a happy camper. By the way, I love the wig!

Karla with a K said...

Nice wig!

Last year when one son was in 1/2 day kindergarten, the nurse called to tell me his face scraped the pavement. No, I didn't need to come in. It just looks bad, so don't GASP when you see him at pick-up.

On my way into the building, a friend was walking out and yelled "Gee, Karla, what'd you do your
kid?!!!"

For that reason ONLY, I guess it was good I got the call. Other than that - why'd you call?

Have fun with the play. Break a le... nevermind. I don't want to be held accountable in case your kids get it from you. ;o)
Karla

VanDerHoekArt said...

I was just catching up on reading your blog. I've been busy too and have fallen behind.

I wanted to say "Boooooo" to the lady that wrote you the comment about not reading your blog anymore. I love reading it! It reminds me that sometimes the toughest days with my son are often the funniest. Now if only I would remember to get the camera out once in a while...

Kila said...

Woohoo, hot mama!

Had to laugh about the bruise. Yeah, after the first couple kids, a black & blue cheek/eye/etc. is no big deal. It's kind of fun to watch it turn colors!

Manic Mom said...

You look HOT as a dumb blond! I think you need to wear that wig to Oprah! Or at least on Sunday when we hang out!!!!

And you are super-de-duper mom--you have all this shit going on, yet you BAKE A CAKE TOO!??!!?

Wendy said...

Dawn: I've been to your blog tons of times, but noticed something today - you have a link to a Williams Syndrome site. How did you come to add that link? Do you know someone with Williams Syndrome? I had never heard of it, until I read a fabulous book (review on my blog at www.ofbooksandboys.blogspot.com) by Oliver Sacks called Musicophilia. Fascinating subject! Know this has nothing to do with injured children or children with excellent memories, but was curious and thought perhaps you'd cover it on your Sunday Sound Out.

Margaret said...

I haven't read your blog for a few days, apparently, it has been a hell of a week all around. My mother came over for dinner tonight and I had to bribe my son into eating dinner and doing his homework. Is that not the same thing we do every night? My mother had to come over because my daughter got a pair of Hello Kitty sweatpants from my sister and they are too big. If she wants to wear them to school, my mother has to hem them, so I had to invite her to dinner. If my mother hadn't been so good at it, perhaps I would have learned to do it too.

As a little experiment, I did go on the Lane Bryant site you linked, and I am too small to wear any of their clothes. You should hang in there with the diet, before I gave birth the last time, I weighed in above 210. I weighed myself this morning, 118. I don't exercise, I diet. Dieting is mental, you tell yourself that because you are better than other people, you can stand being hungry without eating. I know it doesn't make sense, but it still works. Other people who eat aren't as strong as you are. I also only eat from a salad plate, never a dinner plate. Dinner plates let you put too much food on them. A salad plate, your food can't touch, and no seconds. If that's what you have for dinner, it won't matter what you're serving. I just turned 40, so I'm older than you and I'd put my stretch marks up against yours any day. You have talked about being on a diet, but if you really mean it, you need to think about making permanent changes in your life. I will never be able to freely enjoy a bowl of ice cream. I know every bite that goes in my mouth. Food is not a reward. I do understand, taking my kids to the store involves buying them doughnuts, Lucky Charms, Doritos and Oreos. I just can't eat it. My sister bought me two shirts for my birthday, size small. They fit fine, but I would never have bought them for myself. Maybe I'm afraid I'll get fat again and I won't be able to wear my clothes and everyone will know right away that I'm fat. Oh my God, that must be the reason. See, your blog does a lot of good. Those of us more neurotic than yourself have mental breakthroughs.

Grandmother Goddess of the Garden said...

Hello my friend...the wig rocks...but mine is more powerful! Loved the marley video, played it this morning before the radiation...one of my favorites ever! Went to catch up on blog reading, found what you wrote about me and went to print it off...slipped in my chair, hit the wrong button and ended up printing out your entire blog...laughed till I cried...just hope I got what I wanted for my box of smiles...I feel better than I have in months...more later.

Kendra

Anonymous said...

I commend you for finding the time to even write a blog (let alone all the other things you do)! You are a blessing to me! You bring back memories of my children's mischief (all adults now)! How many times I frequented the school's nurse for injuries!
Good luck with your play; I love the wig! Thank you for sharing your God-given talent of joy with all of us!
Check this out, it will help Clay's diet: www.discoverlimu.com/naturallylimu

kimikki said...

From personal experience, keep his bruise in mind if he starts having problems with his balance. I have BPPV, benign proximital positional vertigo, stemming from a whack I got on my head a few years ago. It really messes with me sometimes. I know how to correct it, but it can still be disabling for a while.

Robin said...

How's the cheek look now? I love watching a bruise progress and change colors....fun fun! If your wig were a little longer you'd look like Alice in Wonderful! = ) Have a great day!

bestfamily said...

I have told the nurse on more than one occassion..."If it's not that bad then they can stay at school, and I'll check it out when they get home."

Kathy said...

You certainly look different as a blonde. Fortunately, I've never gotten a call from the school nurse. Unfortunately, I've gotten several from the school principal!

www.kathy-iamwhoiam.blogspot.com

Mrs. Schmitty said...

School nurses seem to be very paranoid and love to send kids home. My son's nurse will send a kid home with a fever. Yea, like 99.2.

Life with Spirit said...

Have you lost weight??? Your face looks really thin in this picture! Do tell!

rthling said...

How cute are you?!!! Work it, Momma!

I had a call like that once, before homeschool happened to our family. I drove the thirty minute drive in something like 18 minutes. And I carried the first grader out to the car and to the hospital. She squalled for quite a while when she thought she was going to need stitches, but then the liquid Lortab kicked in and everyone was her best friend. No stitches necessary, and no broken bones, praise God, but a bruise we will never forget.

Just don't do what I did, and send your hubby to work when he complains that something doesn't feel right in the tummy region. "It's gas. I'll see you later at the funeral," I say. Then he calls me from the ER. "They said it's my appendix. I'm going to be in surgery in about an hour." (groan) "I'm on my way."

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