Wanted: Someone Who Has at Least a First Grader's Knowledge of English to Edit Want Ads

I spent part of my morning looking through some classified ads. I was hoping to see an ad that stated, "Wanted: a stay at home mom to do a little internet surfing from home. Starting salary $75k. Must not have any computer knowledge, must not be able to converse with adults on any subjects beyond diaper changing, fourth grade math homework, and the best spit-up stain removers. Being out of the work force for 13 years a plus. Must be willing to tune out your kids in order to hang out on the computer for 2 -3 hours day.

Surprisingly, I didn't see any such ads. What I did find were several ads looking for freelance work. Now I don't know about you, but I don't think I would want to work for a company who misspelled the word "once", not once, but twice. I'm certainly not perfect and make my fair share of typos, but if you're placing a want ad, you might want to do a little proofreading. Please.
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We are seeking editors/writers to write entries (around 500 words) on a blog for writers. Bloggers should be proficient with American English usage and terms, as well as be used to using WordPress. We want people who are motivated and interested in writing/the English language, what you have learnt and how you perceive the writing/publishing world. You will need to write at least 2 posts per week to the blog.

Hmmm, what have I learnt about the English language...
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I need 2000 articles on various sources for magazine publishing. The right provider should have good writing and grammer skills.

I guess spelling is optional?

Should also have a creative writing side, developing articles people will enjoy reading. All articles must be 1000 words or more on various topics I will provide.I don't do escrow or advance payment. I will pay through PayPal. I required a Net 15 day payment policy.

and now what do you require?
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We would like to offer you the job in our international tourism company - Clubfreedom- like an independent marketing consultant. Unlimited cheap vacations, $6000 salary once a month and less,

$6000 once a month and less?

personal site and much more is quaranteed.

quarantined? guaranteed? Anyone?
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I need a few opinion essays for my Intro to Ethics class as I don't have enough time to finish them. I need the following:- 6 x 250 words' reviews which are based upon articles which I will provide from the textbook.

Yes, this sounds ethical.
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we are looking for a german copywriter for web content, we will provide 3 keywords per page, then the copywriter should good copy around these keywords, 600-800 words and each keyword should appear 3 times.

Oh, I shouldn't bad copy them? How about capitalization? Is that bad too?
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Our company is looking for a company or freelancer interested in a join venture on a gaming project.

We'll be joining on this venture?

We have already domains, company made specially for the project, servers and the idea of the project. All information will be granted onced we have choosed the right company to work with.

No comment

We are offering a % of the business (from 20 to 30%) your work will be to do the whole gaming system, gaming design, website, databases, system admin, affiliate system etc.. we already have the whole idea, all we need is a company that can make it real. We wont provide any investment on the gaming part, thats your work. Companies interested must be in contact 10 hours a day, 5 days a week throw msn, skype, aim or gtalk.

How does one throw MSN?

Company selected will sign a contract with our company before starting and onced

There's that word again. Onced upon a time...

finished and tested all systems, we will invite you to our offices in Madrid or London so you can know us and sign the final contract. Our company will pay for your flight and stay doesnt matter where you are from.Company must respect dead lines,

What exactly are dead lines?

we need serious people.We prefer young people, unmarried who love to work for a better future, as married have too many responsabilities and that could deliver in not meeting deadlines.

So, you don't like married people, punctuation, spelling, or capitalization?