Chicago Blizzard 2011

We got twenty-two inches of snow two nights ago. That was on top of the snow we already had on the ground. The wind was brutal and caused drifts over four feet high, but the coolest part about this storm was the "thundersnow". In all my thirty-ten years, I've never seen thundersnow. It was wicked strange to see lightning and hear thunder in the midst of a snowstorm. I tried to get the lightning on tape, but missed it. I did get some decent footage of the snow blowing in the high winds, however.

(Just ignore the dialogue from Groundhog Day in the background. I was going to mute it, but when I viewed the video with the sound muted, it looked like I'd just sped up the film because the wind is blowing that hard. So I left the sound in so you could see that was the actual speed of the wind.)



We couldn't open our front door yesterday morning, so I trudged through waist high drifts to get to the front porch and started shoveling. After about 20 minutes, you could barely tell I'd done anything and I felt like I was in cardiac arrest. I remembered how cool the blizzard of '79 was I wondered what had happened to me in the last 32 years to make me think that snow was pure evil. For some reason, kids view snow through totally different eyes.

Kids also view snow days through different eyes than their parents. Now, to be fair, I honestly can't even remember the last snow day we had. We're used to snow here. It snows, we plow, and we go on. They don't close businesses or school for several inches of snow. Chicagoans aren't sissies. We're impervious to bad weather. But, when twenty-four inches dump on you in less than than twenty-four hours, well, even the most organized and prepared team of snow plows can't keep up with that.

So, the kids have been home the past couple days. I've dried six loads of coats, snowpants, mittens, etc. I've washed my slushy floors twice. I painted Brooklyn's nails. Then I painted Lex's nails. Then I painted Brooklyn's again because "I want them to look just like Lexi's". Then I listened to Lexi complain because she didn't want Brooklyn's nails to look just like hers. I picked up enough food to feed a small nation off the floor. I told the kids to put their dishes in the dishwasher at least 50,000 times. I cleaned up at least a dozen sticky hot chocolate messes. I watched several hours of fashion shows. And I did a little happy dance when the school called to say it will be in session tomorrow.

Surviving a Snow Day

All the news shows are talking about the blizzard quickly making its way to Chicago. Stores are overrun with people stocking up on snow shovels, food, and rum (that last one is for the parents anticipating a snow day). But people, this is Chicago. We get snow. It happens every year. And even if the news folks give it a catchy name like “Snowpocalypse ‘11”, it’s still just snow. Relax.

The only people who should be freaking out and running around in circles, screaming hysterically, limbs flailing, are the parents facing the inevitable snow day. But never fear, here are some helpful ideas for surviving a snow day with your kids.

1. Throw them outside. Fresh air and exercise are good for kids. They can build a snow gargoyle at the end of your drive to scare away the plows that would otherwise pile the snow in your driveway. And while they’re out there, have them shovel the sidewalks. It’s not child labor if you pay them in hot chocolate.

2. Make hot chocolate so the kids can complain it’s too hot, eat the marshmallows, then leave their still-full cups in a sticky mess on the table.

3. Go to the beach. Spread some beach towels out on your floor, then arrange all your lamps around the room. Play an ocean waves soundtrack, don shorts and shades, and kick back and pretend you’re in Aruba. If you’re really brave, you can put down a sheet and let the kids build castles with Moon Sand. If you go with the Moon Sand option, you might want to hire someone to bring you drinks with little paper umbrellas.

4. Practice math flash cards with your kids to help you remember why you never want to homeschool.

5. Write a strongly worded letter to Bill Nye the Science Guy questioning his ideas about Global Warming.

6. Pitch a tent in the living room and let the kids camp out (or um, in). Make microwave s’mores and tell spooky stories around a flashlight “fire”. Or, if you don’t have a tent, set up a card table and drape blankets over it to make a cool fort.

7. Play CandyLand until you want to do bodily harm to Plumpy of the Gingerbread Plum Trees.

8. Go on Facebook and have a “poke war” with your teens. Or, better yet, write mushy, I love you notes all over your teen’s wall. Make sure you use lots of words like Sweetie Pie, Honey Bunch, and Sweetums Snuggly Bear.

9. Watch old home movies. Have fun remembering all those good times you caught on tape. If the kids complain, tell them you’ll put the videos of them toddling around in a diaper on YouTube for the world (i.e. their friends) to see.

10. Make a fancy dinner and have everyone dress up in their Sunday best. Use your good dishes and dine by candlelight. Turn off the TV and insist that no one burps showtunes at the table, just this once.

11. Turn off the lights and hang blankets over the windows to turn your family room into a movie theater. Let the kids drag out their blankets and pillows (or let them arrange the blankets and pillows that seem to permanently cover your floor). Make some popcorn, put on a movie, snuggle in, and enjoy!

12. Hide a $5 bill in your child’s room and challenge them to clean their room enough to find it. Make sure to supply your child with a garbage bag, hazmat suit and a tetanus shot.

13. Let your kids play dress up with your clothes. Have them put on a fashion show for you. According to my four-year-old, music is essential for this activity and the parent must clap uproariously after each costume change.

14. Bake some cookies. Go online to find a delicious gingerbread recipe and let the kids decorate the gingerbread men with royal icing and candy. Don’t worry about it when your kids give the gingerbread men icing tattoos, scars, or um, “body parts”. All normal kids do this (or so I’m telling myself).

15. Cancel all appointments and plans for the rest of the week because it will take you that long to clean up all the messes the kids will make while home for their snow day. Snap a ton of pictures and/or take video of the day so you can all look back and remember the fun you had.

Thank you Easter Bunny (Bawk Bawk)

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Yes, it's that time of year again. Time to freak the poor kids out by setting them on the lap of a guy dressed up like a giant rabbit. Time to let the kids run loose in an effort to find a few eggs filled with sugar, artificial flavors, and neon colors. Time to pay the therapy bills for the kids who don't find any eggs and subsequently fall into a deep depression.

Austin and Savannah are off skiing with Joe this weekend. You couldn't pay me to do that. Falling down a hill with giant sticks on my feet while I freeze my butt off is not my idea of fun. Anyway, while Joe was having some fun bonding time with the older kids, I took the little kiddos to visit my grandma today. They had an Easter egg hunt, and you could also visit with the Easter bunny. Although we love visiting my grandma, I don't think I'll ever go back for this event again. Ever. The kids were excited to find the eggs, but all the eggs were filled with candy that my kids couldn't have. Jackson was awesome. He understands about the diet and knows that he feels better and is more in control of himself when he sticks to it. Clay, on the other hand, is too young to really understand and he happily scarfed down a couple pieces of candy before I was able to take it away and replace it with candy that doesn't have additives.

Now, Joe and I thought the diet was working with Clay, but after the all-out screaming, insane, meltdown of epic proportions, now I know 100% for sure, that the diet is working. Not too long after eating the candy, he went into orbit and as far as I can tell, is still somewhere near the Andromeda Galaxy. It was a nice little reassurance that the diet is helping, and it was a great reminder of why I'm doing it.


Don't make me sit on this creepy bunny's lap! I'll cry! I mean it - I'll cry! And yell! I'm not kidding around! Get me outta here!


Jackson is saving Brooklyn from the bunny. Clay is telling me that the bunny is going to eat his ear. And Lexi is looking to make a quick getaway.


I think my nephew, Dominick, is saying, "What the...???"

Yes, I think the kids have been sufficiently warped until next Easter.

Oh and remember these beautiful pictures of snow?



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Well, this is what is left. Not quite so stunning anymore, huh?




Yep, that's SNOW after it has been sitting around for a month.

I love when the weather starts getting warmer and the air smells fresh and clean. It's wonderful seeing the plants and trees that have been nothing but dry, dead-looking sticks all winter suddenly sprout spots of green. The sun which has been hidden all winter, starts making an appearance, renewing and energizing all it touches. The boredom and depression of winter starts to give way to the promise of spring. And, more importantly, the kids, who insist on spending every spare minute outside, track mud inside over every inch of floor and carpet because it's physically impossible for children to REMOVE THEIR SHOES WHEN THEY WALK IN THE DOOR!

Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow...

I didn't write last night because I was at rehearsal. That's right. I said "yes" to being in the play because I'm stupid. Do you know people like this? Maybe you are a person like this.

Will you do this?
Yes.

Will you do that?
Yes.

Can you help with this?
Yep.

Will you volunteer for that?
Sure.

Do you mind taking on this project?
No problem.

Why do I do this? I thought I'd gotten better at saying "no", but apparently not. I got my editor's notes this week. They were longer than my book. (Just kidding, Beth) Anyway, I have a lot of work to do and now I have to memorize a million lines. I have got to be the dumbest person I know. Well maybe not the dumbest, but I'm definitely in the top ten. Anyway...

You guys thought my kids' fort and snowmen were cool? Check these out! I took the kids to a snow sculpture exhibition/contest tonight. I wish I'd gotten some better pictures, but it was freezing and snowy out there tonight and the kids were turning into popsicles so we quickly looked at the sculptures and left. I ran some errands earlier today and it was warm enough to just wear a sweatshirt. Crazy weather.

The gang


Youthful dreams

Swan (this one was really cool!)

It's What You Wear

Atlas


Jellyfish (this one was really cool too!)


Cheese (there were mice crawling through the holes in the cheese and a knife sticking in the bloc)

It's Not Over 'til the Fat Lady Swings (Get it? LOL!!!!)

It's hard to tell from the picture, but this was really cool. It's a boat floating in the clouds above the Chicago skyline.

Slow Dancing Turtles (I wonder if they have Comcast?)

After our trip to see the sculptures, we came home and watched Evan Almighty. Anyone ever see this? I liked it. it wasn't awesome-great, but I thought it was entertaining, if a little predictable, and the kids liked it. Of course, I never saw Bruce Almighty so I didn't have anything to compare it to.

Makes ya think though- if some guy claimed that God had told him to build an ark and invited you to come along lest you get flushed away in a flood, would you hop onboard? Would you think he was a kook of magnificent proportions? I have to admit that I'd probably think he was in need of some serious psychiatric drugs. Although if I saw the herds of animals standing around (like in the movie) I'd be inclined to take a little cruise aboard the ark, I think.

How about if you were Evan? What if God told you to do something like build an ark in your backyard? You'd probably think you were losing your mind. I know I would. How many of us would listen? This is my problem. I'm usually too busy blabbering away and I forget to take time to listen. Maybe God isn't telling us to build an ark, but if we take the time to listen, I think we might find that He is indeed to trying to tell us something. Perhaps it's just to do something that seems little and insignificant to us, but like they said in the movie, "You can change the world one little Act of Random Kindness at a time."