Thursday, November 1, 2007

Bless his Heart

My husband, bless his heart (Southerners tell me that you can say anything you want to as long as you add "bless his/her heart". That somehow negates the insulting nature of the comment. For example, "That dress makes her look like Shamu, bless her heart." Or "Her cooking's so bad, it could kill a horse, bless her heart.") Anyway, my husband, bless his heart, is making me insane. He's basically a good guy. He doesn't go out drinking with the guys. He doesn't feel the need to watch sports on TV twenty-four hours a day. He's had the same job for over twenty years. He cleans up after himself and he's pretty good with the kids. No complaints really.

So why does it make me absolutely insane when he does something like eat ice cream? Seriously, the sound of his spoon clinking against the bowl sends me over the edge. It's a perfectly normal reaction to want to jam the spoon down his throat when he does this, right?
I'm sure it's a perfectly well-adjusted reaction to want throw his toothbrush in the toilet when he leaves globs of toothpaste in the sink or when he walks around taking a tour of the house while brushing his teeth instead of just standing over the sink like a normal person.

When he talks to me while I'm typing, it also makes me nuts. It isn't the talking so much that bothers me as it is the "hovering". I hate when people hover over my shoulder while I read my mail or type anything. It's not that my mail contains any top secret government documents or that I'm writing private letters to secret admirers. I'm really not sure why, but it just drives me up a wall. It makes me want to type something like, 'tonight is the night. I'm going to poison his dinner...' just so he'll stop reading over my shoulder. My kids do this all the time too. Actually, they come in my room, flop down on my bed and sigh repeatedly until I ask, "What's up? What do you want?" in an effort to get them out of my room so I can finish typing. Inevitably their answer is, "I'm bored."

"Oh you must have seen the sign on my door that reads, "Entertainment Committee". Please, come in, come in, and let me find something fun for you to do. Let's see, you could fold those twenty baskets of laundry I haven't gotten to. No? You can wash the dishes that are piled to the ceiling or scrub the bathroom floors. Not challenging enough? Perhaps you'd like to go around the house with the magic eraser and eliminate all traces of your siblings' artwork from the walls. Oh! I've got a good one for you! How about you practice your instrument that I paid a million dollars for and is now collecting dust! Do you even remember how to put it together?"

They usually decide they're not that bored after all at this point.

Here's the thing about having a computer tucked away in your bedroom. Everyone wants to come in your room to see if they're missing out on something. That's fine. I can (usually) deal with all the interruptions. The thing I don't deal with very well is the fact that they never just walk in my room to ask me a question. No, they bring half a dozen toys with them every time. And they leave them there. On my floor. As if I don't have enough piles of mail and homework and other stuff to go through, now I either need to pick up dozens of toys every time I walk out of my room or I need to get the kids to pick them up. Maybe I should put some of those airport security bins outside my bedroom door and make them empty their pockets, deposit all toys, books, food items, shoes, and socks before entering my room.
I am SO saving up for a laptop.

Lex just came in my room singing a song that had the melody of the alphabet song, but she didn't name any letters. Instead she sang nonsense words in an unknown language.
"What do you think Mom? Do you like my song?"
"Yes, that was interesting. What were you singing?"
"The alphabet song."
"Really?"
"Yes, I was singing in Hawaiio (sounds like a combination of Hawaii and Ohio)."
"Ha-wai-oh?"
"Yes, it's like Spanish."
"I see."

After Lex left, Clay ran in full speed ahead (the only speed at which this kid moves), banged into my wall, fell back on his butt, and said, "I wish I was a hot rod."
Do you know what this is? It's a medicine holder. This morning when I gave Lex her penicillin, instead of drinking it, she poured it in this case. Not in the sink or the toilet or even the garbage can. Nope, she poured it in here because obviously I'm too stupid to possibly catch on to this little trick. Every day, twice a day, Lexi screams and cries and otherwise tries to get out of taking her medicine. Today, she walks away with the cup of medicine and returns a few seconds later, the cup miraculously empty, not a tear in sight. Yeah, I'll never have a clue that she didn't drink it. This, my friends, is why you never let a child out of your sight to take their medicine. This is also why there's always an extra tablespoon or so of medicine when your child has finished their course of antibiotics. Doctors and pharmacists just know that the kids are going to spit out or try to dump a dose somewhere along the way.
Thank goodness I have my new super soft cloth diaper to put on my baby since her butt is the color of this Barbie case. Yep, diarrhea is what happens when you let your baby have just a bit too much candy.

138 comments:

The Hall Family said...

I love your blog...always makes me laugh.

My daughter gets the diarrhea from antibiotics...maybe that could be it? Yogurt seems to help some, or acidopholis (sp)? I hope her bum heals up.

Anonymous said...

YAY! I'm first!

Manic Mom said...

My hubby drives me nuts when he's eating cereal and banging the spoon along the inside! Must be the same thing!

And WE have the same BARBIE case; well not "WE" but Diva does!

If you get a chance, stop by my blog--I'm doing that Blog Post a day thing: NaPOBLOMO lamma lamma ding dong and am featuring bloggers every day in the month of November... it's called A Minute With Manic... would love to have you be a part of it!

I love Dawn! said...

I just wanna say that I love your blog!You are my clouds silver lining.Thank you:)

Nicole P. said...

OMG!!! I soooo cannot stand for someone to stand over my shoulder when I am typing either. It is completely annoying!
My husband drives me crazy as well. His thing is that he will pick up his dirty laundry, carry it all the way to the laundry room, and then drop it in the floor in front of the hamper. On the floor, 2 ft from the hamper, what the heck???

Pattie said...

Oh that is so funny, thanks for making my day bright..

Valarie said...

Ha! I caught my daughter trying to get my dog to lap her antibiotics up out of the little cup about 6 months ago. Luckily my dog is picky and he wanted nothing to do with it.

Anonymous said...

Yep! I'd say that "bless her/his heart changes the tone of just about any statement.

Anonymous said...

Wow Dawn...it's an early post tonight for us East Coast folks...thanks!

I am laughing at your post tonight for many various reasons.. to your comments about your husband and the ice cream. I truly thought I was the only one who had a husband that drove me crazy with this....I cannot stand the sound of him scraping every last bit of melted ice cream out of his bowl....UGH!!!

The walking around brushing teeth...same here....the hovering over the emails....same here....the kids piling the toys in your room...same here.....

You just crack me up! :P

Anonymous said...

Apparently, from experience with my daughter, diarrhea is what happens when they eat tomatoes, broccoli, candy, fruit, avocados, etc. etc. etc... Last year, my son told me he had "ballerina" So that is the term we use... sounds so much less unpleasant.

tAnYeTTa said...

Hilarious!!!!!! I loved this post.

tearese said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets extremely annoyed at my husband for the most ridiculous things. (He hovers too.) And you should totally get a laptop.

Bigmammy said...

Well as I read this my 10 year old came to tell me that my 3 year old peed in my bed :) Don't you love it.
She is potty trained, but decided she was to tired to go to the bathroom :)
Thanks for making me laugh at the little things. Your blog makes me smile everyday.
Amy M. mom to four

Misty said...

Nothing really to say, just wanted to give you a hug. :)

Misty

Lisa said...

I've been enjoying your blog for weeks, but I haven't posted a comment because I haven't had anything relevant to say. I read an article in one of those parenting magazines at the doctor's office about "Rules" for easier parenting. One of the rules was "Boredom Does Not Exist." I thought that was brilliant. When your kid says "I'm bored" (which really means "entertain me"), you reply with "boredom does not exist, it is just a failure of your imagination." Thus the burden of their entertainment is put back on them.

This sounds good in theory, but I have yet to test it in real life. My 4-year-old has yet to be bored as she can always find something to tear up, scribble on, chew on, or (my personal favorite) take exactly one piece from each and every toy in the house and combine them into some vessel which is then hidden someplace for me to discover in a few months.

Keep up the good work!

Jill said...

Hi Dawn,
I totally hear you about the kidlets bringing stuff in while you are typing. I am lucky enough to have my own room to run my home business from. As I look around right now, I see 3 stuffed animals, 5 Disney DVDs (outside of their cases) about a dozen kid's books, a bunch of candy wrappers, a Halloween costume, a battery operated jack-o-lantern light, and a swimming suit, none of which belong to me. My office is the smallest room in the house, and it is not uncommon to have all 4 kids in here while I am working.
I loved the Halloween pictures of your baby. My 2 year old was also confused at first, until he got the candy, after that there was no stopping him. I was getting tired and asked him if he wanted to go home, and he says "No! more candy! After every house we went to he said "MORE CANDY!" I really had to struggle to get him back home, bless his heart.

Karen said...

I hate the hovering husband too. I usually just instantly shut things down, which of course makes it looks suspiciously as though I'm making top secret plans.

Dont' you just love those magic erasers? A mom invented those. I'm sure of it. The mom of an artist.

Julia said...

Dawn,
Love your blog. Started reading when I received and email staring your Poke-mon cards from ebay-ingenious.
I have had a blog for a year, but mainly write for my family and friends. Thanks for the inspiration. I've added a link on my blog to yours, so enjoy a few more guests (mainly my mom). I have 2 boys, so my life is more like, "no we are not going to have a third".

About your husband....yep, I have that same problem. Like when he chooses to eat candy in bed (and never gains a pound). Isn't it ironic that all the things that use to make you love someone suddenly do the opposite? Although, I find that I have less woes than the average wife (he's a chef, so at least I know I'm going to get chocolate covered strawberries and tiramisu in bed too.)

Keep writing, I'll keep reading...
Julia~

Kristen said...

I can't stand it when my hubby eats a banana. Something about the sound of him chewing is like fingernails on a blackboard.
My family doesn't read over my shoulder at the computer but they refuse to stop talking until I give into their demands. There's something about my answering an email that brings on hunger pangs & major catastropes for the anklebiters.

Kami said...

Funny as always. Some days I tell myself to just make it thru the day so I can get a laugh from your blog! LOL! It's been a few rough months here in Ga! Anyways...I am making my first trek to visit family with TWO kids. My youngest is just over a month old and my older one just turned 6. My husband is USAF and is gone for 2 mths. So the Fl grandparents have asked us to come down for a long weekend. Wish I was goint to Disney though! Anyway...wish me luck...it is only a 5 hour drive without a 1 mth old! Let's see how it is with one!

suburbancorrespondent said...

I love Magic Erasers. They are my best friends. And the airport bin is a good idea - have you thought of locking your door, also? Of course, then it's hard to get any work done when you have 4 little pairs of fists banging on the door and a toddler wailing to beat the band. Although I am getting pretty good at tuning it all out. Benign neglect, I call it.

I bet there are things we do that annoy our husbands just as much as their spoon-clinking and tooth-brushing and BREATHING TOO HARD ON MY FACE WHEN I AM TRYING TO SLEEP annoy us.

Whew - just had to get that off my chest.

Gretchen said...

Ok, I have a HUGE problem with eating noises anyway, but my husband slurps anything hot. And I hate anyone chewing with their mouth open, clicking their teeth on their utensil...and sometimes if I can just hear them chewing or crunching I have to physically restrain myself. I am SO glad I'm not the only one out there! Thank you Dawn, Thank you!

Amen
Gretchen
www.simonpeters.org

Gretchen said...

Oh yeah, and my husband hovers too.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Keeley said...

Hahahaha! =D

My pet peeve is hearing ANY member of my family...except the baby...eating cereal. They SLUUURRRRP and aggggghhhhh it drives me bonkers. STOP SLURPING! My son says it's no fun eating cereal without slurping. Eurgh.

What drives my husband up the wall is me sitting at the computer giggling or, frankly, laughing out loud at blogs I'm reading... =D

Ooooh, Oooh, my kids haven't told me they're bored for about three years now, because I would always give them a chore to do...and then MAKE them do it. Muhahahaha. =D

I love cloth diapers. =)

How are your kids doing? Feeling better?

Everyday stuff said...

I almost hate to tell you this, but well the laptop might not help that much! I have the same problem mostly with my husband since my daughter is only two! And if I'm at my desk he wont talk to me...but if I'm on the couch with the laptop its like I'm doing nothing at all its crazy!

You should look at the bins at IKEA for your airport dump station!

Anonymous said...

Okay, Dawn, when did my husband move into your house??? I cannot stand it when he hovers over me while I go through my email (bless his heart) haha! He just did it a few minutes ago and my daughter (who was also hovering in the room) said, "I HATE it when Daddy reads over my shoulder! haha
Thanks for all the laughs -- keep 'em coming!!

Jill said...

I hate when people read over my shoulder too. HATE HATE HATE. It makes me so nervous, even if I'm not doing anything that needs to be hidden.

If you're using a cloth diaper to clear up rash, a good tip is to add a fleece liner. You can just cut one out of a piece of fleece, or even an old fleece jacket that you might have had in the Goodwill box. Lay it inside the diaper and it'll keep the moisture off her butt.

Brenda said...

I think husbands do those annoying things on purpose just to annoy us. It is kind of like a secret guy code. Bang your bowl with your spoon, be gross when you brush your teeth. I'm not sure but I think they even have meetings to discuss it.

Kimberly said...

Girl you are having one of my moments .. I think its time to break out the dead bolt lock .Lock yourself into your room , turn up your favorite tunes(tunes are a must to drown out the banging on the door) set back with your feet up while drinking a nice warm cup of cocoa!

Sis Sarah said...

This is what I do when a young child/toddler/infant has to take meds and refuses or spits them out (my son will choke, gag, and puke)

I give it to them when they are asleep. Just put it in the syringe and the little boogers will slurp it right down.

Tammy said...

I can totally relate. Just tonight I was wondering what was wrong with my husband - why was he spooning the mac & cheese like he was 3 years old. I wanted to grab the spoon away from him. And my DH is VERY helpful, so that isn't an issue. Just a mommy thing, maybe?

Anonymous said...

Hubbies? Don't get me started!

DH had nose surgery many moons ago to correct a deviated septum. While in the area, they enlarged or reduced the size of his turbinates, whichever gives it more breathing space.

Anyway, as a result of the surgery, whenever he eats anything the least bit crispy, the sound resonates...No, that's being too kind...it literally trumpets through his nose. I can hear that rhythmic "CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!" anywhere in the house, with the vacuum running, dishwasher, washing machine, etc. Drives me up the wall!

From watching those old WWII newsreel films, I could swear that Hitler's soldiers are goose-stepping down our street, Bless his Heart!

RE: Daughter/Meds...

My granddaughter also REFUSED her antibiotics. They really DID taste bad, but she had to take them. Dr suggested chocolate candy afterwards to mask the after-taste. But she wouldn't take them to begin with!

I "modified" the chocolate thing...took a LARGE spoon, poured in some Chocolate Fudge ice-cream topping, poured out the antibiotic
dose on top of Fudge, then covered with more chocolate fudge sauce. She gulped it right down! Worked like a charm throughout the course of meds. Hope this helps her!

o/ o/ "Just a spoonful of Chocolate Fudge sauce make the medicine go down o/ o/

Take care!

Nancy Binky

Rick said...

Message to the individual looking over Dawn's shoulder at this moment: Sssh! Don't tell anyone, but insanity is hereditary - you get it from your children.

http://www.organizeddoodles.blogspot.com/

Tina said...

I'm sorry to hear about the rash. They ALWAYS gave my children (5 girls in all) rashes, too. I use TRIPLE PASTE for their little bottoms. It also has other great uses. Just ask my husband after sweating in the hot summer weather working on one of our rentals! (chafting BIG TIME!) Seriously, this stuff is great! It doesn't sting like some other "rash" ointments. Another product (while we're on the subject) that I can't live without in my medicine cabinet is Arniflora -arnica gel aka: "bruise medicine." I find it at our natural food store. We've had sooooooo many bumps and this wonderful product magically makes them disappear! I bumped my leg on the stool I use to nurse my younguns, put the gel on and poof! No bruise! It's GREAT!

onthegomom said...

Ha, I about lost it with this, "When he talks to me while I'm typing, it also makes me nuts". I was JUST typing a business letter about a two hours ago and my husband and I had a "discussion" about him talking to me while I am on the computer and deep in thought. He was offended... go figure. (uhhh, notice I am STILL on the computer!)

http://momoftheyear-not.blogspot.com/

plainprecious said...

Use cornstarch that you use for cooking on her butt and it will clear up toot sweet. Just smooth it over affected area and you'll be amazed at how fast it works!! :)

My hubby drives me nuts when he eats. Its like he cant breathe through his nose. So he chews and breaths through his mouth at same time. Most of the time he does this while we are in bed him watching tv and me trying to go to sleep after being up for 20 hours. Makes me wanna put a pillow over his head. Also drives me nuts when I am trying to type something and someone asks me a question. My mind is concentrating on my wording of something and they want an answer NOW. and get annoyed because I dont answer now!!!! Why is it that no one will be around and when I go into the bathroom everyone needs me? It also irritates me to NO end when everyone asks me where something of THEIRS is. My favorite Roseanne Barr qoute from her show was What is my uterus a tracking device? I tell my kids that all the time. Or.... The last time I wore your hat was......... NEVER!!!

Keep up the great work. Hugs Elisabeth

Becky said...

My husband hovers too, which bugs me when I'm on the computer, because the way we have it situated in our house my back is to everyone out in what was formerly known as the dining room.

The thing that bugs me worse is when he walks all over the house with a cordless phone. When I'm trying to think in write and the volume goes up as he passes by...that drives me crazy.

But like you said, no complaints otherwise. ;0) I'm sure he's got a couple of these annoyances on me, too, lol.

Lizzy in the Burbs said...

You probably know all the secrets for treating diaper rash (after six babies, I mean!) but thought I'd suggest what I used to do for my kids. It's simple and doesn't cost alot. Pour a very lukewarm bath and add a packet of Aveno Baby Oatmeal bath powder. It's not grainy like outmeal, it's very fine like a powder and disolves in the water. Let her soak for as long as she'll tolerate. It's very soothing and will take away the sting. Also, letting her "air out" down there for awhile would help, too, although at her age you know you'll probably be dealing with some accidents. One of your readers suggested eating some yogurt, and that's a very good idea. It puts things back in balance, and avoiding acidic foods like orange juice, spaghetti sauce, etc., which can be irritating. Good luck!

Mitchell Maddness said...

You, seriously, make me laugh daily! I love your blog and would like to post a link to it on my website. It's raisingafamily.net. Check it out sometime. My sister in law and I started it a few weeks ago. Let us know what you think of it and if we can post a link to your blog.

Leon said...

You mean it's not normal to wander through the house while brushing my teeth? Oh, oh, I'm in trouble. Nearly 7 decades on this earth and I just learned that I'm just not as I should be. Oh well, this old dog is not likely to learn new tricks. :-)

Lauren said...

I can't stand when my husband eats, period. It sounds like he gargles his food when he chews. His mouth is completely shut, yet it sounds like this.. I just don't understand it.

JCK said...

The hovering over the shoulder while I'm typing thing drives me nuts! Slurping coffee, clanging spoon in cereal bowl, leaving little bits of hair in the sink after shaving...but, otherwise my man is perfect!

Thanks for the laughs.

Anonymous said...

Okay, I'm guilty of the traveling teeth brushing so I guess I would drive you nuts there. (I think it drives my husband nuts too.) The thing that kills me is the sound of my husband eating, and dragging his teeth across his utensil! Normal people use their lips! Now he does it purposefully loud to annoy me if he remembers! Ugh!!

Good luck with the diaper rash! And if you find a solution to the toys all over the house, please write about it! I have the same issue with my two year old already!

carrie & troy keiser said...

Oh, I so hear ya on the hovering! my children do this to me daily, hourly minutly ... drives me BATTY! I'm not alone! I feel SO much better now, thanks! :)

Loth said...

Shoes, it's shoes with us. They come into my room, take off their shoes so that they can jump up on the bed, the better to interrupt me and then leave their shoes on the floor where I will fall over them next morning. And this morning I found my 9 year old's ball of green "Snotslime" on my bedside table. It's fake stuff he got with a comic but it gave me pause for thought at 6am let me tell you.

Anonymous said...

The Northerner equivalent of "bless her/his heart" is "no offense". You can say some really mean and nasty things if you say "no offense" first. Or even after. "No offense, but I wouldn't be caught dead with those shoes." or "That is the most hideous purse I have ever seen, no offense" Try it!

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add one more thought on the diaper rash, I've never tried the aveno, but I put a little white vinegar or baking soda in the bath. They also work great. They dry out the rash and help neutralize the irritation. I run a day care and one little girl I watched had horrible rashes with teething. The only thing that worked was bag balm. It's actually for cow utters. The mom found it at Walgreens. Also, if the rash is really bad (bleeding), I'll clean between diapers with a washcloth or papertowel dipped in vinegar water. The wipes hurt so bad and the vinegar water doesn't. Then I dry with another paper towel to speed up the "dry out" process.

I had to give my daughter a med that was awful. I tasted it and it left a horrible taste in my mouth so I ran and ate a hershey's kiss. It really worked! Once she knew she'd get chocolate afterwards I had no problem with her. But I liked the hot fudge idea, too.

Debbie in Overland Park, KS

Kitty said...

I'm going to have to do the "tonights the night" typing trick... I'll let you know if it works because I AM going to try it on mine!!! I HATE that with a passion.

Nancy said...

Good thing my hubby went to work cause he'd have seen me laughing my head off till my stomach hurt reading this morning...he hates my laughing at the computer too...which of course brings on the hovering.
My 14 year old daughter made me a sign for my bedroom door which reads -- Escaped Mom...Don't tell anyone you saw me.-- Now of course realize that unless hubby is home or you have older kids this is not possible since the short people will tear the house apart or severely injure each other while you are 'escaping'.
Extremely funny stuff today..I loved some of the readers comments. Keep it coming.

Jenn said...

I have a daughter with chronic ear infections - 14 in a span of about 10 months (in fact, just went through the adenoid/tonsil surgery right before your most recent little one did) so we've taken A LOT of antibiotics in our time. I finally figured out that the trick was to mix the dose with a good wallop of chocolate syrup. She sucks it down every time now without a fight.

I love your blog. I've been lurking a long time and really enjoying it!

Tonia said...

Oh, I am with you on the hovering while tying thing. My hubby does that all the time.

Brooke said...

Ya know what's worse than hovering? Sitting two feet away from me at the kithen table trying to talk to me while I read blogs. I will pretend to listen to him while he tells me some non-entertaining story about work while I'm reading a very interesting day of some perfectly wonderful stranger. I'll try to keep reading while he's talking and then he'll say something to which I'm supposed to respond and so then I have to ask "What?" THen he gets mad and finally leaves me in peace. HA!

Maybe I should do the same to him while he's watching Sports Central...or whatever that goofy thing is called where three men argue while a time clock is going. When it dings they have to switch subjects.....I really detest that show!!! :))

Oh and thanks for telling us about "Screamfree parenting". I got mine in the mail yesterday and I'm on the third chapter but it doesn't tell how not to yell at your 3 year old when he licks raw chicken.....

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn, I am cracking up at this blog. My husband Bless His Heart! Does the same annoying Man things! I was having a discussion with a few men friends about the toothbrush left on the counter (and the shaver,shaving cream, Hair) All on the bathroom sink. They say Who says it should go back in the vanity. Leave it there for next time! Arrgghh! And whats with Men and Flipping through everything with the Tv remote? Bless Their Hearts! Kristine (Deer Widow) in Michigan.

The Hotfessional said...

My husband's ex-wife, who calls me about money all the time, bless her heart, is a kind and gentrified southern lady who would never, ever, insult someone in the manner you relate. After all, she's now a minister's wife, bless her heart.

Anonymous said...

computer/hover:

Oh yeah, Before my finger hit the keys. I'm on the computer and all three girls toddle in. (ages 1,2 and 6)with toys in tow, the fourth kid, my husband follows a few seconds later. Slyly trying to read my screen

Argh!

Martha said...

My hubby does the same obnoxious thing when he eats cereal. He gets to the bottom of the bowl and scrape, scrape, scrape to get the last few granules of the 5 tablespoons of sugar that he put on his cereal. I could not count the times I have wanted to shove the spoon down his throat.
And my kids are the same way about hovering over me when I am on the computer. I think it is a personal space issue. The longer you have kids the larger your personal space bubble needs to be. Stand back 5 feet please!

Angela72181 said...

Oh you mean simple things annoy you? I thought it was just me that got so annoyed at the sound of my fiance blowing the foghorn (his nose) in the bathroom next to our daughters room where she is sound asleep..or should I say was...after taking 45 minutes to get her down. I could strangle him at times like this. And with the medicine...coming from a Mom who has 2 kids ages 2 1/2 years and 5 1/2 months that have been on antibiotics 2 times within a month the diaper rash could be coming from the combo of candy and meds. We have found one thing that gets our oldest to take his medicine is say if you're a big boy, take your medicine you can have a.....of course when he wants a Thomas Train every time it gets costly and he has to accept a $1.00 matchbox car instead. We stocked up and kept them on the top of the fridge for rewards. He had pneumonia the first time that turned into an ear infect and the little girl had an ear infection that didn't completely heal with the first round of amoxicillon and we're on something stronger now. Hope she gets to feeling better soon...at least now it's starting to get colder and we've had a few frosts to help kill off some of the germs....we had 3 on antibiotics at the same time....both kids and my fiance...lovely when the whole house is sick..makes me feel like a ticking time bomb getting ready to get sick at every time with no sick time left at work because I have used it all up on maternity leave and then sick kids....LOVELY

Janet said...

Our computer is in the bedroom as well. It is on a raised desk and I do not have a chair. We stand up to type. This is the only way to keep the kids away from it. I have learned to tune out distractions because our only TV is also in the bedroom. We aren't hooked up to cable or anything, but the kids watch videos or DVDs first thing in the morning before breakfast while I blog. They're watching "Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day" as we speak, although William is apparently ready to go eat, so we will. Hope Lexi and Brooklyn both feel better soon. Good luck with the meds - my kids both think it's a grand treat to take medicine, so I have no advice on that score. And I can't really complain about my husband, because he does almost all the cooking around here, so I will forgive a multitude of sins based on that!

Tonya said...

I know the feeling! My kids do that same thing and it drives me up a wall!! They are 16, 13, 8, 3 and they all so it. My husband doesn't drive me nuts eating ice cream though. Have you tried plastic bowls??

Heather said...

My husband bites his spoon when eating soup or cereal. Drives me crazy. In my house, I'm known as the "Camp Counselor." When my husband asks, "What do you have planned for us for the night," I respond with, "What am I? The Camp Counselor?" Apparently I am.

http://3boysundermyroof.blogspot.com

Kerrin Quall said...

Seriously, I feel like we are living mirrored lives in different countries! Can I just tell you that the laptop makes NO DIFFERENCE. They just follow you. Its like that great idea of getting a cordless phone so that you can leave the room when the noise gets too much, they just follow you to the next room. Same with the laptop, they sniff you out, hunt you down and catch you just when you think you are in the clear. I did have a thought of just taking the laptop with me to the toilet, but sadly my 3yo and 5yo still haven't learnt the boundary of the toilet door...

and I should show this post to my three older kids, show them that I'm not the only person in this world who thinks that helping out with the housework is a perfect way to rid you of the boredom bug! They still look at me like I have two heads when I suggest that one. I keep hoping that one day it will work...

thanks for the smiles today Dawn!

K

MissHum22 said...

Can any man tell me why your species is okay with hawking loogies into the sink & not rinsing them down (with the gobs of toothpaste?) And the same goes for the tiolet - keep flushing until the bowl is clean!

Each time I was pregnant, I would go into a gagging fit when I looked into "his" sink. (When I'm not pregnant, I just get irritated by it.)

girlymom said...

Dawn,
Love your blog, it's great to see how another mom does it day to day. Definately get a laptop and splurge on wireless internet, you can hide from the kids anywhere! http://momof4girls.blogspot.com/

Jill in Atlanta said...

I guess I should have known that something was up when we first moved into our house. I never learned my neighbor's last name; everyone referred to him as "Greg, Bless his heart". He lived up to that reputation. God Bless the South.

My computer is in the kitchen, and combined with the convenience is a new 6yo reader who MUST read every word he sees. Over. My. Shoulder. ARGGHH!

Michelle said...

I absolutely hate it when anyone hovers when I'm typing. It drives me nuts!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi! I was reading the comments people were leaving and wanted to comment about a comment :) Someone recommended using cornstarch for the diaper rash but coming from a pharmacy school point of view I wanted to say to avoid that. Fungi love cornstarch and increase the chances of getting a fungus infection. Anything with a cornstarch base should be avoided. Probiotics are great for the diarrhea. Have you tried letting her eat something cold before she takes the medicine. It's suppose to help "numb" the taste buds to where you can't taste the medicine so much.

Andrea said...

Oh dear husbands what are we to do. Mine scrapes his teeth on his dinner fork while eating!! ARGGGG!! Makes me what to shove it down his dear little throat!! But I love him to death!! And I love hot wheels under my feet. That is my favorite to step on a hot wheel that has a supped up engine, that really pokes your foot!! What would life be without kids!!

Darla said...

Okay, again I'm glad I got to read your blog today! I can't stand when our bedroom becomes the major hang out place in the house. I try tell the kids, "No, this is MY space...the only place in the whole house that I don't share with YOU! I should have one place I can come that is MY haven...blah, blah, blah..." it all falls on deaf ears! It doesn't help when my husband just LOVES when all the kids come hang out with him on the bed, sprawled out all over the floor, crawling all over him, etc. That way he can horse around with them or sneak in a nap and no one complains because then they have free reign to our bedroom (this is especially if I'm not home and my husband is in charge) and they won't get harassed about it. Our computer is in our bedroom too so if I'm on it they're wreaking havoc on our room or harassing me. Another thing, my husband slurps EVERYTHING from cereal to milk to water to his diet Coke. I swear he pulls in as much air as food or fluid, if not more. Then pretty much milliseconds after he swallows he belches enough air back out that he almost triggers his gag reflex. I'm waiting one of these days for his food/fluid to come spraying back up with the air. I try tell him that the concept is quite simple. Just swallow without the vacuum and you're good to go. I think he secretly feels more manly that he can do that! I try keep his ego in check by telling him his newborn daughter can almost blow him out of the water with her burps!

MamaD said...

I actually have a HORRIBLE eating pet peeve. I can't stand the sound of anyone eating. It drives me nuts. But the worse is when we sit down to watch a movie my husband make popcorn and sits down right next to me smacking his lips and chewing with his mouth open. I CAN'T HEAR THE MOVIE! Its horrible. I have to tell him all the time "Honey, can you please close your mouth when you chew!"

Melissa said...

I love your blog but just reading about your life makes me tired. I think you need another vacation on your own to a tropical isle.

I remember having to practically sit on Hope to give her meds. Not fun at all.

The Mother Bear said...

Again, I think we are living the same life in a parallel universe. I get the life in the Southeast with four kids and you get the one in the North with six. :-)

If the "I'm Bored" statement comes out of a mouth at my house, the No Boredom Fairy makes an appearance passing out random terrible chores until the boredom spell passes. (It's a dirty trick, but someone has to be the Mother Bear.)

So, jot down a list of Anti-Boredom chores and post it on the door of the bedroom where you want to escape for some peace and quiet. The list should be titled: Things I Will Make You Do If You Tell Me You Are Bored.

For example:

1) Identify the Species Game: Scrub out the bottoms of the bathroom trashcans and identify what you find there. (Because anyone with kids knows that the bathroom trashcan is like a safe haven for bizarre, colorful, half-chewed things that are permenently attached to the bottom surface for no known reason.)

2) Reverse Treasure Hunt: Get a broom and sweep everything out from under your bed into a pile and figure out where it goes. (Warning: this one can easily go wrong when said child leaves the pile and you have to choose to either pick it up yourself or sweep it back under the bed and erase the memory from your brain.)

3) Race to Find Your Clothes: dump those ten loads of clean but unfolded laundry on the bed and have the kids race to put their own clothes into piles. Tell them after they finish that everyone's a winner and gets to put away the socks and underwear as the grand prize.

Trust me. The No Boredom Fairy always works. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha. :-)

Stacie said...

ah. My hubby, bless his heart, takes bites that are so big that his jaw dislocates and relocates with an annoying click. Smaller bites would kill him, I think.

heidi said...

Reading your posts always make me laugh. And reading all the comments to the posts are just as hilarious. My DH lets all the toothpaste dribble down his wrist while he's brushing. Totally grosses me out. He also snores all night long. I've had to sleep on the couch just to avoid all the pig noises. I try turning him over, kicking him, poking him. He just grumbles at me, like I'm disturbing him! People tell me to wear ear plugs. But, who would hear the kids' cries for help? DH is deaf :-). Check out my blog for all the craziness of raising a kid with bipolar. http://postcardsfromholland.blogspot.com/

heidi said...

My DH plugs his nose when he sneezes. I tell him he will blow out his eardrums. He says he doesn't care. He's deaf anyway.

Anonymous said...

Ah, it's so good to know that other families experience the same things! We end up with piles of toys in the living room and computer area, too. How come they can never take the toys with them when the go??

As always, I love reading your blog. You help me put things back in perspective and remember to laugh! :)

Thanks!
Faithful Iowa reader

Anonymous said...

Dawn (and everyone who is annoyed by noises,)

If you are sensitive to other noises as well (a rattle in your vehicle,) changes in lighting (the kids flicking a light switch off and on,) dramatic changes in temperature (walking from the cold outside to the warm inside,) an aversion to strong smells, or any unusual/abnormal sensitivies related to any of your 5 senses, you may have sensory defensiveness. (Google this phrase for more info, or specifically auditory defensiveness if only your hearing/noises bother you.) I discovered this about 10 years ago and just understanding the nature of the "disorder" as well as knowing I'm not the only one out there with this problem has really helped me. Hope it helps someone else too.

janet said...

ok.... a zillion comments later, you'll come to mine ;-)

i can.not.stand. when anyone sniffle/snorfle/WONT BLOW THEIR NOSE. ew ew ew. (and i have kids and a husband with allergies. gag)

as for the diaper rash, if you brew strong strong strong tea, let it cool, soak a cloth in it and diaper it right in next to her skin... got that from a pediatrician many years ago. i also used the liquid instead of wipies. brilliant, yeah? :-)

Amy said...

Having a good day? ;)

Just so you know, it grosses me out when my husband eats ice cream, too. He rolls it around in his mouth, or something, and it just creeps me out. Plus, it sticks on his mustache. Ew.

Monica said...

My husband, bless his heart, brushes the KIDS teeth wherever he happens to be in the house at bedtime. "Kids! Bring me the toothpaste and toothbrushes!" Drives me freakin' nutty, because years from now, my daughters-in-law are going to blame ME for the fact that their husbands brush their teeth in random places rather than in the bathroom like civilized people! Sigh.

Mariah said...

I can feel your daughters pain about taking her antibiotics. I was her about 20 years ago. Probably worse!! And I was sick A LOT!! My poor mom.
That is until my mother discovered the trick...." you take your med all day today I without a fight I will give you a dollar!!" Or she would let me pick from a grab bag of goodies/small toys/new crayons..ect..
and the best trick of all hiding it in ice cream or pudding. I never even knew I took it.

Jon and Alisa McCormick said...

I don't even have kids yet, but I am addicted to your blog! And I could not agree with you more about wanting to write something provocative when he is hovering. I hate hovering. I am going to do it one of these days just to teach him a lesson!

HeyItsBeej said...

Yeah, the medicine thing. Hemorrhoidal isn't it. For six months, Kevin took his capsules JUST FINE. Then suddenly... ::gag, retch, ack ack ack::..."Mommmm! These are too big for me to swallow! They're gonna make me hurrrrrl!" Rackin' frackin' brackin' kid, not after six months of "down just fine" they're not.

Oh, and Kev's just discovered the "if I throw my apple away at lunch time, Mom won't know that I didn't eat it." He explained the logic behind his trickery to one of his teachers, who then clued me in.

Dirtbag.

Nancy said...

As a woman suffering from PMS right now, I TOTALLY understand about your wonderful husband driving you bonkers! My hubby is in the dog house AT LEAST twice a month... :)
LOVE LOVE LOVE your blog!

reen said...

Honestly, I would love to see your comments numbered so I could be in even more awe of you. :)

You should know that Clay's hot rod impersonation very nearly got me in trouble at work, I was snickering so hard! That gave me such a great visual...I'll be snorting all day now.

Jerilyn Winstead said...

I love your posts--I'm going to use the "bless his/her heart" trick!

For picking up toys, I love the Love & Logic approach. You ask them "Are you going to pick up your toys, or am I?" Of course, if you do it, the toy disappears (Goodwill, or to some inaccessible place for a while--you choose). If they care about their stuff, they'll soon learn to pick them up themselves, LOL!

For Halloween this year, we helped a friend in his huge homemade haunted house--the kids liked that better than trick-or-treating, tho they got that in, too. It was a blast!

Anonymous said...

This is true! While I'm reading this entry, nodding my head because I can so relate, my three year old walks in and says, "Mom, look I can bend my straw!" Yes, I guess that was important enough to interrupt Mom at the computer. I guess I just need to get used to it because it happens every single time I come to read your blog. Love it! Keep writing! I'll keep laughing!

Anonymous said...

I love your style of writing, it has an easy to read Rowling feel to it.
I dont have kids myself so reading your daily trials is very interesting and it seems your quite popular. Six kids though, I wonder in this day and age though how appropriate that is to the country and world at large and how much we should glorify that. Would you recommend couples have that many in this day and age of questioning resources, immigration issues and population numbers?
To give kids a fighting chance with vehicles and college educations needed to be competitive in the future let alone today's standards I dont know how you do it. Not to be mean and point you out I just wonder what your thoughts are on matter given your popularity stems from this.

So much talk about over fishing, high Hispanic births from illegal immigration, arson fires from California where their population numbers are astronomically in process of doubling,not enough oil to go around,deteriorating roads from traffic overcrowding, more and more suburbs and strip malls taking over wild land. Personally it makes us think if bringing children into world is for benefit of the future child or just a selfish act we feel we need to do to keep up with Jones.

Anonymous said...

I love your blog, I've been reading it since you were in the Trib and you crack me up every day. I had to write today because my husband hovers while I'm on the computer too. I have no idea why, and it drives me nuts. I am certainly not doing anything interesting and yet there he is. My kids seem to be drawn to me as soon as the hear the computer turned on to. Moms are just so darn interesting no matter what they are doing. =)

Deanna said...

I hate the hovering! I get a lot of that here at my house.

BTW, I love your blog. It puts a smile on my face!

Terri H said...

Can you ask your doctor about an alternative to the nasty penicillin she has to take? I grew up on that stuff, and if I'd been smart, I'd have hid it too. The stuff I grew up with was penicillin with an attempt to flavor it with raspberry. Man, I hated that stuff.

Lindsy said...

Oh my goodness! This was just the laugh I needed....my husband, bless his heart, drives me up a wall when he is eating too.....last night he was eating a carmel apple and I just looked at him and asked him if he HAD to make those noises when eating an apple.....LOL! Glad it isn't just me with husbands and "eating issues" :o)

boyandgirl2 said...

Target now has several flavors that they can mix into liquid medicine...maybe Lex would prefer one of those.

Anonymous said...

Omigosh....right now I am at the computer in my bedroom. My two darling angels (LMAO) are playing elevator in my closet.

My little pony is on my bed, they are trying to get my dog to talk on the play phone. Poor puppy, she follows me everywhere hoping for a little peace.

DH's work boots are two feet from the closet with dirty socks stuffed in them! YUCK!

They are laughing and not fighting for these few minutes.

healthymomof2 said...

Ugh - I totally hear you. Except with my husband it isn't the ice cream that annoys me. It's the OBNOXIOUS way he eats soup or cereal; slurping every spoonful. It drives me INSANE! In fact just thinking about it irritates me. You would think after 13 years I would have learned to deal with it.

Bren said...

The important question is does he put the ice cream bowl in the sink when he's done with all the spoon clanking?

Gina said...

I have no Idea who you are. I have found you through a series of "clicks," beginning at my sister Trish's blog. I just read your ebay listing for the Pokemon cards. I getit. I want to tell you that I TOTALLY understand what it is like to shop with a small tribe milling around you. We have 5. When people ask me if they are all mine i glibly reply, "No, they are half thier father's, too." and leave them there scratching thier head over that. I have 2 girls in the middle who though, they are 16 months apart are the same size. We are constantly asked if they are twins- a valid question since my family even has trouble. I think it was about the 5th time I was asked that day so I finally just said, "Yes, but she's 4 1/2, and she's only 3." Hmm....
Blessings to you and your tribe from me and mine.

Bana said...

Hey I love your blog! For anyone reading this, could you please sign this petition that was emailed to me? I am sure many women read this so it's connected to you! Insurance companies are trying to make a masectomy (when a women's breast are removed due to cancer) an OUTPATIENT visit rather than giving a woman two freaking days to recover from her breasts being ripped out and tubes stuck in her! This is WRONG! Please sign! All you need to put is your name and zipcode. Thank you.

http://www.lifetimetv.com/community/my-lifetime-commitment/breast-cancer/petition/breast-cancer-petition

Dawn if you read this (I wasn't sure how to contact you, can you post it on a blog or something, I know so many people read your wonderful blog).

Darla said...

Okay, here goes post #2 for today..I promise I won't do it again!!! Oh, I almost hyperventilated from laughter when I read the post from "Anonymous" at 2:39pm. I have a funny feeling you won't even have to respond to that one...your readers will probably address these heavy world issues for you. The one point I chuckled the most was regarding "glorifying" having 6 kids.. and, are people trying to keep up with the Joneses when they're having kids. I can tell you this much, I don't think you're "glorifying" anything...you're addressing what it's like to be a mother of a large family...very unglorifying and real is what I read. As a mother of six myself, I can tell you that if anyone even watched me for 10 seconds running circles trying to figure out exactly what I'm trying to do, they would take one look and decide to keep up with the Andersons instead, it would be a much more "glorifying" and glamorous lifestyle! And if that didn't change their minds about having a large family, try going through pregnancy (many times barfing their guts out much of the time) and childbirth thing and all that entails...x6 (or whatever large number you shoot for)!!! No one would endure this so many times just on a whim, to follow a trend. AFter a childbirth or two, they would be decidedly on to another trend. I am quite sure this commentor meant nothing bad. It was surely just a deep, committed attempt to fulfill the many causes he/she believes in (shows that they have a little time on their hands..:)just kidding of course!). As far as the college education, cars, etc., coming from a large family myself (11 kids), almost all of us have gone on to get a college education. Guess how much it cost my dad (my mom died when I was young)? Nothing! All of us have had automobiles. How much did it cost my dad? Not a penny! Out of 3 1/2 years of college and an Associates Degree in Science, Nursing (RN), how much debt did I incur? $1,800 in student loans and no credit cards, charge cards, etc. Why? Because, as a member of a large family, we were taught how to be frugile with our money and not to over-indulge ourselves! We still had a very carefree childhood and only took on jobs in high school if we wanted to and if we kept our grades up! Some of the one and two kids families I grew up with got everything they ever wanted and more, became partiers and druggies, either started college (parents paid for it) and never finished or never started at all....I think the injustice being done isn't by parents of large families! I truly believe that coming from a large family teaches you something in life, for life, that just comes naturally from being in a large family! Almost all large families that I know of have the same type of story and have gone on to raise large families themselves...and feel very blessed and enriched..most of the time ;)!!! I have thoughts on over-population and such but I will spare you all!! :) And, I apologize to "Anonymous" if I came across a little overzealously! I just feel that an opinion that strong in that way just shows lack of education when it comes to family and child-rearing and maybe even lack of knowledge of life in general. Just a guess...a pretty young person, obviously without children!

Tiff said...

My husband does that hover thing too! Like he never has anything interesting to write in emails so mine are totally fascinating to read while I am writing or reading. Drives me crazy and he always talks to me while I am on the computer too. Never talks to me really in depth any other time, oh well maybe I should be happy....maybe. I am going to do that writing thing about the poisoning of the food, maybe he will stop. Thanks for the laugh. He is gone again for 3 days after coming home from working for 3days on the fires here in CA.

cheryl said...

i hate when hubby hovers me when i'm on the computer it drives me insane,he's like what are you hiding,nothing mr. go away.hope your baby gets better soon,when my kids were younger and had a rash i would let them running around bare butt to air out,i would have to keep an eye on them,so they wouldn't drop any surprises,lol

Donna D said...

I love your blog! I can so relate to it. I am a mom of 4, but mine are all teenagers now. My kids don't tell me I'm bored anymore. I always suggest hammer and nails will cure that problem. Isn't that what you use on boards?

As far as the hubbie, oh I can so relate. My husband is an OTR truck driver, so when he is home, he is right here. Wherever I am. I need my space!!!

Over the shoulder reading, I can't stand it. I broke my kids from doing it by returning the favor. LOL

Dawn said...

Thank you Darla! Well said. The first thought that came to my mind in response to Anonymous's question was, "I'm not trying to overpopulate the earth, just outnumber the stupid people." But I figured that was kinda rude. :D I couldn't agree more with what you said regarding financial responsibility. No, we aren't rich. No we can't give our kids everything they want, but quite honestly, I wouldn't give them everything they wanted even if I could afford it. They recognize the difference between "wants" and "needs". I believe they'll grow up to be responsible with money. We own very old cars. We very rarely go out to eat. We don't do a lot of extras, but my kids always have clothes and food and a home. It's a matter of priorities.

Kati said...

UGH! Ice cream! And the worst thing about MY husband is that he adds almonds to it! So...I get the clanking of the teeth and the crunching of the almonds! And.....IT ALWAYS seems like this little ritual is while I am trying to fall asleep!!!!!!! Bless his little heart.
Kati
priceisrightfamily.blogspot.com

Aileen (Pronounced A-Leen) said...

Thank you Dawn you have now convinced me I am completely normal and not alone LOL

I sure hope the person who said you should get a laptop donates one to you, won't that be nice of them! ;-)

Kila said...

My husband also walks around while brushing his teeth. Why?! And it's embarrassing when he brushes his teeth, or puts on deoderant, while standing in frong of the window that faces the neighbor's house!

How I HATE dealing with liquid medicines. I always have to call for more--we always run out a couple days too early.

Kila said...

Darla, I loved your comment!

Mandy C. said...

My husband licks his ice cream bowl :) I like to tease him about it, but it doesn't bother me...yet. We'll see what I think when all the kids start doing it too and getting it in their hair, etc. (I have a 4 yr. old and triplet girls that are 20 months.) Thanks for the laughs.

Suzanne said...

We've run into the toys left in other rooms here, too. I've decided it's a territory marking kind of thing. Mostly I've decided that because now that we have kids, the dog does it, too. Actually, now that we have two kids the poor dog is having to work twice as hard to leave as many toys in each room as the kids leave. So much fun for mom....

justgottalaugh said...

Last time I checked, the Jones' stopped at 2.7 children. Seems like you passed the Jones' about 4 kids ago! Keep up the pace, you're winning!!

Cialynne1 said...

Ya know.. I don't have kids either, but I have to say that I don't spend a large amount of time wondering why families like the one that Dawn and her husband have created would make a conscious choice to have 6 children, and all the rest that Anonymous said.

I think that couples who make the decision to have large families in the times we live in are very courageous because it is not as easy to have large families as it was many years ago. Couples who decide to take on large families that are made up of children that they had themselves, and then one or 2 that they either adopted or are fostering is something else too.

What special people all of those who have families are. Especially those that take the time to raise their children with all of the love and attention that children need to grow up without feeling emotionally scarred takes one or two really phenomenal parents.. I don't just specifically mean Dawn and her husband. I mean any couple on the face of this earth that has been lucky enough to realize that they wanted even 1 child and then to go further and have 2 to 12 more children.. That takes guts, determination, and lots and lots of hair dye once they hit their teenage years.. :)

Bless you all!
Linda

Anonymous said...

By Darla, at November 2, 2007 8:11 PM

First off, just wanted to say that I agree with Darla's post!

I only have 3 kids, I don't know how you do it with 6 kids. I am looking forward to your book! And I will make sure my local libraries have a copy!

Chris M. said...

For me, it's Doritos. OH MY GOD if I have to listen to my husband crunch one more freakin' Dorito and then proceed to chew it with his mouth open you will see me on the 6:00 news.

Tismee2 said...

Yep another one here - and I felt the need to post on my own blog to follow on from this as you got me thinking more about this subject - Thanks for the inspiration Dawn.

Lisa said...

Not 10 seconds before I read your blog, I was yelling at my husband for reading over my shoulder and talking to me while I was typing. I have a few peeves about my husband. I can't stand it when he (or any men for that matter) drink milk, eat cereal, or lay on the couch with a blanket on. Those activities make men look weak. Some of them are weak, but I like to think my husband isn't.

Anonymous said...

This is one of your funniest posts! I love it. This is the kind of stuff I hope to see in your book someday!

DomesticGDS said...

My husband has taken off of work and been home since Wednesday night. I'd like to tell you that there is one specific thing he does to annoy me right now, but I'm too busy wishing it was Monday and he was back at work. Seriously, I think we will have to get seperate houses when he retires.

Save those laptop pennies, Girl! My favorite place to type on mine is the bathroom. I can put my computer on the sink and sit on the toothbrushing stool. Oh, it's not because no one bothers me in the bathroom, I swear there is a device that lets my family know when my butt touches the seat. No, I like typing in there because of the door. IT HAS A LOCK ON IT! : D

Jp said...

Ha, he, ho. The hovering thing drives my mom nuts too.

erica said...

dawn - love the blog! this is the first blog i've ever followed and its great. i'm so glad i found you thru the funny times. i would love to hear how you guys wound up with 6 kids. your family seems great. i have enough trouble keeping up with my 3 (10.5, 6, 11 months)- i totally admire anyone with the the mental health for more. here are some of my family pet peeves:
-i'm never needed as badly by my kids as when i'm on the phone. especially to show me a miniscule paper cut that happened in school 5 hours ago.
-hubby doesn't hover too much, thank god. he grew up in a family with no privacy whatsoever so he values it. but... he loves to dump his dirty laundry next to the hamper, always leaves his water bottle and empty snack wrappers on the floor next to the bed.
-baby is now in the chewing on shoes stage so DH has to always forget his flip-flops in the living room.
-whenever we switch to new toothbrushes DH can't remember which is his, so rather than wake me at 5 am when he gets up for work. he just picks one. half the time its mine. shuddddderrrrrr....

Kathy said...

I hear you. My son is always bored until I give him the option of cleaning his room, helping clean house, cleaning the litter box, etc. Then, he miracously finds something else to do! I love your blog.

www.kathy-iamwhoiam.blogspot.com

jackie said...

I think that my husband and yours must have been twins at birth. Come to think of it, I didn't realize that I had a twin sister! Except that I stopped at 4, and it is the stirring of coffee that drives me snaky.

Nicki said...

My husband drives me crazy when he leaves water running and walks away. Why does he do this? Beats me. I love the idea of airport security bins.

Darla said...

Oh, I just couldn't resist another quick comment on Anonymous' post on here regarding overpopulation and such. My oldest daughter who is 11 years old heard me reading this post. When I got to this part, "..deteriorating roads due to traffic overcrowding..", I just chuckled and said, "Hey, we carpool! We all ride in the same vehicle, we're not adding vehicles to the road!!!" My daughter added, "AND, more kids mean more people to fix the roads!!!" Smart girl, Bless Her Heart!!!

Anonymous said...

Dawn-
you have made my day. As a mom to 3-(4 and under) and 25 weeks pregnant- I am usually grumpy mommy. Some serious laugh therapy-and the comments are ALMOST as great!
blessings-
rhonda

Tara said...

Ah....a hubby who chomps his spoon and wanders to and fro on toothbrush safaris -- if only more men would keep their crimes to that level! It give me warm fuzzies, like watching the short ones (who have no such lovely daddy) make sculptures of their potatoes and forts of the futon cushion. What a lucky woman you are!!

StampingJoan said...

Dawn,
I really related to this one! My DH drived me crazy with his spoon when he eats oatmeal (has to get every last little bit!) he drags his fork on his teeth when he eats, and he was hovering over me the other night and I lost it!

Glad to read I am not alone!!!

Dana said...

I am glad I'm not the only one who is annoyed by the glob of toothpaste in the sink! That just annoys me. And you made me laugh out loud with what you want to write when your hubby is reading over your shoulder!! My husband does the same thing, and it drives me crazy! I usually just sit there and do nothing until he gets bored and leaves!
Thanks for the laughs!

Jay said...

Ladies ladies- I have two words-
PLASTIC SPOONS!
Seriously!

We have spoons bought for camping that are LEXAN and wash in the dishwasher and are perfect in every way and they don't clink on the teeth- Ahhhit's a heavenly silence and IF he uses another when I am around, I grin and pass him the plastic spoon!

Lucille said...

I just got back from a long weekend and it was GREAT to come home and read YOUR blog! I was away from modern technology and gee I missed it and missed YOU!

:)

Keep up the good work and good luck with the editor!

Jenny in Ca said...

you had me cracking up over this post!

I'm thinking I should get a name tag that says "cruise director", since that seems to be my job, I direct them to do what comes next and think up things to do when they are bored. I am a cruise director and they think life is one big cruise...sigh.

jc said...

Just to see if the "bless your heart" thing works on someone while talking directly to them, I told my wife, "Honey, I'm afraid that blouse adds a couple pounds, bless your heart." After dodging a couple of hard back novels sailing in my direction, my suspicions were confirmed.

Anonymous said...

In reference to Nov. 1 entry, I must tell you (as a true Southerner) that when we say "Bless his/her (pea-picking little) heart," we are really thinking "he/she is sooo stupid." We are saying it with the utmost affection though, so that makes it OK.

I must tell you too, that my sisters and I truly love your blog. Thank you

Amy in Georgia

Anonymous said...

I too have a million good things to say about my hubby. But the spoon getting every last spot of food on his plate it the number one annoyance!

Deb

Shiloah B. said...

ROFL I now live in the south and will have to start using "bless her heart" more often. I like it! ROFL! Funny post!

nutralady2001 said...

Oh dear Dawn I have neglected you disgracefully had LIFE (yes it deserves capital letters), I have so many bells going off in my head reading your post and not even half the comments where to start?

When we were kids my brother drove me nuts eating his cereal and I would go "Mum , he's going kar-slurp again!" Oh I am smiling as I type this, he was my only sibling and he died in 1988 when he was 37.It still hurts but just the memory of that brought a smile to my face, thank you!

Not related to medicine but to food. When my funny smart (now 31 one year old) chronic asthmatic/Type 1 diabetic/ ADHD son was around 18 months- 2 years old, he was sitting in his high chair and not eating his breakfast. I told him he had to eat it before he could get down. I went into the bedroom and all of a sudden heard "busy" noises coming from the kitchen. I sneaked in and peeked around the corner just in time to see he had somehow climbed down from his high chair with his bowl and was just scraping the last of it into the rubbish bin ( he somehow got that opened as well) he turned around and saw me and with a big beaming smile and mop of blonde curls (everyone thought he was a girl...*rolls eyes**.........) presented his bowl to me and said "All gone Mummy" it just cracked me up there was no way I could be cross and keep a straight face at the same time

nutralady2001 said...

Ok I'm still waiting for my other post written a couple of minutes ago to be approved and I'm already on a roll.I KNEW I shouldn't have started reading from the bottom up because as soon as I started reading references to "Anonymous" "overpopulation"
"overfishing (what?) and "highway damage" I just had to follow the trail back to Anonymous' post and before I got there I'm thinking "I bet whoever this is doesn't have kids!"

Oh dear am laughing so hard right now...MY DAD WAS ONE OF FIFTEEN !! He was the second youngest and as I said previously they weren't Mormon's (or Catholics the other big assumption) they were very good Methodists.

The birth rate has declined rapidly in Australia so much so that one politician (of the male gender) suggested that couples have one child to replace each of them and "one for the country" If you want to see a tirade you should have seen the abuse that created at the time (I'd already done my bit by then including one for the country) I couldn't emulate my grandmother though much as I wanted to, I got to 40 and with my smart funny son ( think I'll refer to him as that from now on) needing a high degree of care, and a 4 year old and an 18 month old I knew I'd left my run too late even though after 3 I still wanted a 4th and would probably have no trouble, pregnant first month each time ,dream pregnancies thought of my grandmother having my Dad at 41 and the last at 44 ...

I

just

couldn't

do

it



So this didn't really address Anon's need to reply to you....or maybe it did (bless his/her little cotton pickin' heart)

Kelly, Candace, Brendan & Corbin said...

well bless your heart! sounds like you've had enough of just about everyone...the trouble is, how do you get away from the 7 others you share your house with??
here's to moments of sanity,
candace
http://thebanksbunch.blogspot.com
p.s...just in case you wondered, i am southern (the great state of texas) and i think we really can't help but bless people's hearts...it's just a saying that is bred into us...kinda like yall...

Anonymous said...

I like to walk around while I brush my teeth, too. Good for your husband, blessed heart and all!

Emily's Blog said...

My daughter - bless her crazy 15-year-old heart - will come into the office, plop down on the chair and say, "What're you doin'?" I can't type another thing until she leaves! She's not bored though. She just wants to drive me away from the computer so that she can change her top 8 and her default photo on myspace.

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