Thursday, October 4, 2007

Why Does Your Backpack Smell Like Feet?

  • This afternoon I picked my middle kids up from school like I do every day. My son came walking out of school dragging his backpack along the blacktop like he does every day. Then he told me, "My backpack's all wet. My water bottle leaked and I have a World Book Encyclopedia in it."

    I thought my son dragged his backpack along the ground in an effort to put holes in the bag and make me crazy, but perhaps it's just because he has the habit of checking ENCYCLOPEDIAS out of the library. Yes, my son likes to check out encyclopedias. How else can you can absorb large quantities of knowledge on a given letter of the alphabet and build up your biceps carrying it to and from school at the same time? Then another thought hit me. "Great! Because I didn't spend enough money at the library yesterday, now I'll have to buy an encyclopedia!"

    I asked him, "Did you take your water bottle out?"

    "No."

    "Jackson!" I rummaged in his backpack, looking for the leaking water bottle. I didn't find any water bottle. Instead I found a leaking carton of chocolate milk. I pulled the soggy, disgusting carton out of the bag and held it up. "WHY do you have this in your backpack? Did you really think you could save unrefrigerated milk all day long?"

    "I don't know," came his well thought out answer.

    "Ugh Jackson." I pulled assorted papers (not in his folder, but just crumpled in the bottom of his bag) and books out of his backpack. Nice. Everything was soaked in extremely smelly chocolate milk.

    When we got home, we went through the papers and tossed most of them in the garbage. His reading log was completely waterlogged. The encyclopedia, thankfully, didn't have a drop on it! I left the backpack outside and told Jackson to hose it down and wash it out with dish soap, then, envisioning him spraying the whole front yard until it was foaming with soap, I decided to clean it out myself.

    I carried the offending carton of warm chocolate milk inside and went to pour it down the sink. However it didn't pour. Chunks of brown, cottage cheese looking, spoiled, nastiness plopped out of the carton. (I might add here that I'm extremely proud of myself for not throwing up, although I'm feeling a little queasy just remembering the scene.)

    "Jackson! How long was that carton in your backpack?!"

    "Two days."

    "WHY???"

    Again came his famous answer, "I don't know."

    With four kids in school, I don't make a habit of going through their backpacks every night. Obviously. They pull out their homework and any papers for me, I help them with their homework if they need it, I check it, I sign their homework journal, and they put everything back into the bag. I guess, from now on, I'll have to ask, "Do you have any homework? Do you have any papers for me? Do you have anything that needs to be signed? Do you have any cartons of chocolate milk in your backpack?"

    Oh, yes, how could I forget? Among the papers marinated in spoiled milk, was an invitation to a birthday party. A party being held tomorrow.

    "Jackson, how long have you had this invitation?"

    "I don't know."

    "Ugh, I have to RSVP and explain why I'm calling the day before the party. How embarrassing." I didn't even know this mom because the birthday girl is new to our school this year. I phoned the mom of the birthday girl and explained why I was rudely calling the day before the party to thank her for inviting my son and to say that we already had plans and he wouldn't be able to attend. She was very nice and understanding. I was ready to wring Jackson's neck after she told me that she'd sent the invitations out THREE weeks ago. Then she informed me that her daughter has hearing problems, wears hearing aids and was just mainstreamed into our school and didn't really know anyone. Her daughter had told her that Jackson had gone out of his way to be nice and help her out in her new school.

    I just love hearing stuff like that! It almost makes up for the nasty Bag O' Curdled Milk. Almost. Ok, not really.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Oh yeah! Thanks for the wonderful suggestions of carrying a spare diaper and wipes in my car. I actually do this. I've done this for years. Do you think I remembered that I had a spare diaper in my car yesterday? Noooooo! (Well, what can you expect from 14 functioning brain cells)

121 comments:

A Whole Lot of Nothing said...

Thank goodness for all those crumpled up papers protecting the $75 encyclopedia!

http://awholelotofnothing.net

Jeb said...

The joys of being a parent...

Their Mom said...

My son did the same thing but his was in his lunch pack and from that day. He came home took it out and opened it up and offered it to my youngest. Arg. Why is it that a child can never ask first or atleast wait til he has taken the backpack off his back?

Kristina said...

curdled milk is aweful! but chocolate curdled milk...ugh! You have my sympathy!!!!!!

stephanie said...

That is so sweet! I love how Jackson was so nice to that girl *sniff*.

Anonymous said...

what does ROFL mean?

All moments remembered said...

Just when I think I am the only mom in the world with kids who do strange things!! We once had a sandwhich live in a back pack all summer. It turned to dust. Gross!

I spent the day home with a sick little 5 yr old daughter. High fever and sore throat. Nothing, even spit could be swallowed so we spent the day spitting into a trash can or the toilet when she could make it. It is all I can do to dump the spit out and not hurl! ICK ICK ICK oh the beautiful parts of being a mom!!

I did get my website caught up a bit more. I had to add more Halloween fun stuff. My blog got a super quick note added to it and my eBay is swarming with scrapbook stuff too! Yeah I feel like I can go back to work tomorrow knowing I did something here. Wish my daughter luck being as Daddy is staying home from work to be with her tomorrow. This is what happens when the mommy has to go to work too! We have to take turns calling in sick.
Have a good weekend,
Stacey

Donna said...

Smelly backpacks were a way of life for me when my stepson was growing up... Thanks for the memory...

Rick said...

Jackson - a man with a smelly backpack and a kind heart. We could use more men just like him in this world.

http://organizeddoodles.blogspot.com/

plainprecious said...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh Megan Instead of asking do you have chocolate milk in backpack you might want to ask Do you have anything that needs refridgeration????? Remember the dont grab a can from the bottom of pyramid and son grabbed an orange or whatever fruit at store? One day you might find a half a tuna sandwich in bookbag instead!!!!

Good news we are getting a new kitten tomorrow. Well actually we are getting 2 new kittens. My husband said tonight Get 2 if you want. I was shocked and I think he saw it in my face cause he added I am trying to be nice. Noah age 4 said he wants to name his GRANDMA I am trying to discourage that since I am not sure how his real grandma would handle having a cat named that. Then they decided on PEPSI. Hopefully when daddy asks him to go get him a Pepsi he doesnt grab the cat and take it to him. The other ones name is going to be Dr Pepper. Do you see a trend here?

Backtracking thank god the encyclopedia survived. I would hate to know how much that would have cost to replace. Its cool that he likes to read an especially something like that. My oldest now 19 loved to read when he was little. In fact I told him when he was like 7 that if he was going to read before he went to sleep that he would have to go to bed 1/2 early and he did it with no fights. He was also really into National Public Radio and would listen to cooking with Mrs Casper. He would go into his room and listen and write down recipes. I remember one day when he screamed down from his room Mom I need BEER. It was summertime and all the windows were open I am sure the neighbors thought I was raising a future alchoholic. This was the same kid who would take my pantyhose and tie one leg to his doorknob stretch the other one down the stairs and tie it to railing and call it his invention. For some reason they never fit right after that!!! LOL

Take care Elisabeth
PS Teach the baby to say mom look in van for another diaper.. Then youll always remember!!

Terri H said...

This reminds me of the time my dad sent my son to his private school (before our homeschooling days) with a peach for a snack. Needless to say, the peach spent a few days in there and I was buying new reading books.

You have such a good attitude about all this. Keep it up!

Griffee's said...

Okay..uh yuck! to the chocolate milk story. As for someone leaving you a comment that you should carry an extra diaper in the car...REALLy..did the miss the part where you said you have 6 kids. I have one kid and I carry an extra..and I do not carry around anything baby besides that. I figured you did have the diaper and forgot about it...I'm with you girl.

Anonymous said...

ROFL=rolling on floor laughing (I think!)

Porter Family said...

I just found a website today that came in handy for us. www.howtocleananything.com
I came across it trying to figure out how to get chunks of vaseline out of the carpet. Amazingly enough, they had instructions specifically for how to get vaseline out of your carpet. Maybe they have a section on how to get curdled milk and the accompanying smell out of your child's backpack. Hey, you never know!

Rachel said...

By the way - I am one of those hearing impaired kids (all grown up) who was mainstreamed with the "normal" kids.
Kids like Jackson are far and few between - what a heart of gold!
True compassion and empathy pay incredible dividends when parents invest in their kids.
THANK YOU - from someone who remembers distinctly my first "Jackson" in elementary school who made me first feel "normal".

nancy said...

I found a U Tube video presentation that I'm sure you must have written...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxT5NwQUtVM&mode=related&search

Hysteriacal! The joys of motherhood...

nancy said...

Check this out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxT5NwQUtVM&mode=related&search

ArcticAngel said...

i had to have almost the same conversation with my 6 year old about why you can't keep the "cold pack" part of a hot lunch for days...smelly leaky lettuce all over her homework and homework folder, and while I was drying it with a hair dryer because of course it was due the next day (in my weak defense my hubby and I had been gone 5 nights visiting my sis in MI) the 8 and 4 year olds are running around exclaiming they are going to barf from the smell...***sigh*** joys of mommy hood!

KATE said...

I LOVE it! Stinky make you want to throw up kind of messes are SO much fun! I'm sorry!
But...so cute that he's been so nice to that new girl. Sweet kid, even if he is dragging a nasty dead body smell around in his backpack! ha ha...

River said...

I used to do a complete backpack emptying only at the end of each school term, until an odd smell led me to a 3 month old banana in the older boy's backpack. From then on it was every weekend. I'm greteful now that they all only ever took water to school.

Cathy said...

ROFL = rolling on floor laughing

yes, the joys of parenting!

Bonnie said...

Oh man..the days of finding gross almost-living and walking things in my kids back packs are so NOT over! damn! I laughed so much at your post, you really have a wicked sense of humor! thanks for the laugh! I love your blog!

Kitty said...

My youngest demon once left a bottle of chocolate milk, with the lid off, in my car on a nice summer day... only problem was, that was during a few day spread where we didn't go anywhere that required the use of the car, so about a week later I opened the door to the car, knowing it was going to be hot in there. 90-100 degree temps in July will do that to a car.

It took MONTHS to get that smell out of the car...

Anonymous said...

Your post on the diaper made me laugh. I was out the other day with my baby (our third child) at a function I couldn't leave. She filled her diaper in a big way and I had to change her. I had a full diaper bag with me, but it was crammed so full that I didn't realize I had used all my diapers until the baby was already lying on the changing table with the diaper half off. Thankfully, there was a pull-up from my toddler in the bag. Can you imagine what a 2.5 month old looks like in a size 2T pull-up? Needless to say, after I changed her, I left the baby in her car seat in the stroller and had a mess to clean up when I got home. It could have been worse, though! :-)

Kylie McA said...

Dawn, this was like reading about my own Mitchell *lol* He had a delightful tupperware container of 3 week old mango in his bag that had also managed to leak at some point *gag* and only last week, on the last day of term, I found an invitation to a party that had occurred two weeks ago! Needless to say he didn't go and I have made him call the child and parent and apologise for not RSVPing or attending said party. Ahhhh, kids, gotta love 'em, eh :-D

Hildur Ýr said...

I recommend that the new question should be: Do you have ANY FOOD OR DRINK in your back pack..
I´ve had exploding kiwis, bananas, mouldy sandwiches etc... disgusting!

Stella said...

I carry a spare diaper and wipes in my car too although they are from when my kids were just born so the diaper sizes are like newborn and 1s. The wipes are petrified because they've been sitting in the back of my van since 2002!

Do you watch Friends? The episode where Joey reads the 'V' Encyclopedia and all he talks about are volcanoes and vesuvius??

Crafty Mama said...

Hee hee..I can laugh at this ..now. My son did the same thing. Except I did not find it for about 4 weeks into the school holidayds. Yew. Choc milk. I threw out the bag, contents and all.

suburbancorrespondent said...

I think I would have made him drink it....or is that child abuse?

The Rocking Pony said...

I'm so glad I'm not the only mom who does not check backpacks every night. For sheer numbers you know.

Bag O'Curdled Milk. That is just hysterical nastiness. :)

Anonymous said...

Dawn,
You have GOT to see this if you haven't already:
http://ie.youtube.com/watch?v=sXT6Hs113ZA
This could have been written by YOU (did she steal your material?!)
It is absolutley hilarious!
God bless you!
Alyssa - mom to 7 in VA
son - 11
son - 9
son - 7
son - 5
daughter - 4
daughter - 2
son - 4 months

Angela72181 said...

LOL...oh if relating to the nice old no diaper situation wasn't enough....the chocolate milk that has turned to cottage cheese texture is about the worst. We often realize that we have ran out of bottles for the 2 year old that gets a comfort one before bed for me to only realize that it's because Dad has given him umteen dozen bottles throughout the day with chocolate milk that have either been stuffed underneath the cough, the Tv stand, or left in the boys bedroom. Or there's the sippy cups that are forgotten in the car and you start to smell something awful and clean the car top to bottom to find a rancid sippy with the stuff in it. But like you said at least you don't have to support the new expansion or remodeling at the library quite yet.

little.birdy said...

I am an aspiring speech therapist, and hearing that about your son makes me really happy. Just sayin' :)

Mandy said...

Old milk is the worst, my kids are always loosing their sippy cups filled with milk or juice and it is NASTY when you find them a week later! I think the only thing nastier than a curddled milk is thrown up milk... especially when it's on me. Didn't take me long to learn the #1 rule for sick kids, NO MILK!

Anonymous said...

ROFL - Rolling on Floor Laughing.

Donna Mc - GA said...

The most bizarre thing I've ever discovered in my son's backpack.... what USE to be a small pumpkin! They gave them out to the kids for Halloween & he just stuffed it into a side pocket. Weeks & weeks later I noticed an odd odor & tracked to down to the bag. When I stuck my hand inside the pocket all I felt was mush! ICK! GAG! & BLAHHHH!

I can soooo relate to your adventures in 'Gerbil Herding'...aka raising kids.
God Bless you! Thanks for keeping us so light hearted.

VanderbiltWife said...

How sweet about your son. It made me tear up!

Mich said...

Gross! I'm glad the encyclopedia didn't get damaged. I wonder what the fee for that would have been!

Your son is so sweet to help out that new girl. I would be proud too.

As for the spare diaper in the car, I don't even do it! I should! You would think I'd have thought of it by now with two little ones. Nope!

Teri said...

Alright, I found your blog through Ebay and it is, singlehandly, one of the best I've read. You rock! Thanks!

Teri

Mansuetude said...

Well, keeping diapers in your car is cool, as long as they're not like Jackson's choco milk, curdle full of goodies!!

Bake that in the sun and Whoo hoo... look out mamma!

http://totouchupontheday.com

The Gang's All Here! said...

Thank you so much for that! I was just sitting here praying for my son. Dr. D forgot his "all disposable packaging" lunch in the neighbor's van this a.m. when she dropped our kids off early for their annual 6th grade field trip. And he's just tender and sensitive enough to be embarrassed, humiliated, etc. at having to borrow money from a teacher to buy a real lunch. And to have it ruin his whole day. I'm also sitting here feeling like I've failed him somehow, laden with guilt that in my head I know is waaaaay out of proportion to the situation.

Then I read this. You made me laugh and remember that it's not all that bad. And a little embarrassment won't kill him. He'll know how I felt the last 5 times I bailed him out with stuff he forgot at home. (The school secretary and I are famous friends now!) In perspective, it's not that huge a deal - especially since I haven't even drown out my daily mommy guilt with a hefty mug of coffee yet. "This too shall pass," as my mom reminds me!

Mary Kay Liquidator & Consigner said...

I'm sure several people have sent you this - but incase not...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anSpBUxsgAU

Melissa said...

I'm proud of you that you didn't vomit when you had to deal with the chunky milk...I'm pretty sure I would have.

Note to self: remember to check backpacks every day.

Anonymous said...

"ROFL" means " "Rolling on floor laughing"

Anonymous said...

OMG i didnt thin any other kid did this my middle one did this i wanted to justt throw the whole school bag in the trash but she threw a fit because it was her FAVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV one in the whole wide world so agter 10 wash and half gal of bleach she was able to use it again !

Anonymous said...

@ the other anonymous: Rofl means rolling on the floor laughing. Have you not even talked on the computer with a slightly humorous person for over 5 years??? LOL! (laughing out loud)

Neway...GROSS!!!! EWWW!!! ICK!!! YUCK!!! GET THAT BACKPACK AWAY FROM ME!!!! etc etc...

That's so nice that he was kind to the new girl though...*emotional moment*

Rebecca said...

I think middle school boys are some of the most disgusting creatures. Both of my little brothers who have already gone through/are in this phase are just gross. They go/went to youth camp for a week, didn't shower, didn't bring a toothbrush & swapped dirty clothes with their friends who didn't bathe. I'm not looking forward to those years. Good for him for helping that girl out though, that is sweet - even if his back pack reeked!

Laural said...

That is hilarious! At least, after the fact. Probably not while you were cleaning everything, lol.

Tess said...

I know you already know this, but you have so much to be proud of Jackson for! Aside from carrying milk around in his backpack (LOL), the fact that he took the time to be kind to a new student and help her out says a lot about the type of child you're raising! You both deserve a hug!

Anonymous said...

what a sweetie Jackson is!! you should be very proud!

ROFL means rolling on the floor laughing.

houseofdanes said...

WOW, flashback! I'm so glad my kids are in their 20's now and well almost 18 the girl but did you remind me of disgusting backpacks, moldy half sandwiches GREEN lunchmeat smashed in some compartment, permission slips for school.. due that day!!! so of course I as in me, mom, who has things to do, has to run my butt down to school before the bus leaves... oh man Dawn.... it's all coming back ;) hang in there
now instead of moldy sandwiches or curdled milk you'll find half eaten bowls of cereal or pizza on the cardboard under their bed.

bossybabymom said...

Dawn, I'm new to your blog. Really blogging in general. But my sister sent me your ebay auction and I had to check you out. I have 5 girls. 18 to 3. My husband has a motorcycle. I am a stay at home mom, housecleaner, and photographer. I grocery shop with them so olders can help with youngers. I am nazi mom though, I bark orders from my list and the oldest can bring anything to me, the second (14) has learning disabilities, so it take approx. 5 min. to process my request before she shuffles off to try to find that aisle number I've given her. There are 2 11 year olds. One must stay with the cart at all times as her attention span is that of a fruit fly, but in that same spirit, if she ever forgets to stay attatched to the cart, I know I'll find her in the toy section as that is where she attracts to. But the other 11 year old is a Talented and Gifted student, and smarter than I. She either has left and returned with my requested item before I've even finished my sentence, or she just shows up with some needed thing on the list without seeming to even read the thing! I think she can also move things with her mind as once the baby moved from the seat belted cart seat to the basket while I was price checking. I am sure at that time she was unable to even conceive how to operate the buckle. And my little rocket scientist was just standing there smiling innocently. Rather than ask, I put her on the task of price comparison since she's smarter than I. And I kept my eyes on that baby the rest of the trip and not once did she move from the buckled seat I'd replaced her in. Most snuck by things at the store for me are my ADD 11 year old's fascination with gooze. But even that little rocket scientist likes to put no. 2 pencils packs in once in a while! Go figure. Baby just randomly selects whatever is in front of her and 14 and 18 both try for ice cream. My point in responding to your backpack story though is that my 14 year old must have her back pack checked monthly for in that time it will have accumulated the amount of "stuff" contained usually in warehouses. It gets to the point where she is hunched over and carrying her school stuff in a plastic grocery bag. And of course there is everything from make up to liquified cheese stick that has now turned green. Often the fruitfly population comes directly from her backpack and room for that matter. So while it smells like feet, it also houses a very happy colony of miniature flying pests that year long I can never seem to rid myself of.

Thanks for listening. And thanks for living the life!

Heather said...

This sounds like something my DD would do with the chocolate milk. I love his response. My DDs backpack gets cleaned every night by me, but she's an only child and she's in first grade and I know she is a very messy child. Ever day we have a wad of papers crunched up in the bottom of her backpack.

Last year in Kindergarten she ripped her backback halfway through the school year because she decided to try to stuff her winter coat in her backpack when she didn't want to wear it. Thank God for the D)isney website sale section. I was not having much luck finding a kids school backpack in January!

m.Lee said...

I remember when I was a kid I left an orange in my locker and then went on spring break. I came back to some serious funk in my locker. But unlike your son I had to deal with the damage myself and so I learned my lesson and have never let an orange spoil since. Not as disgusting as curdled milk, but very smelly. Twenty years later and I still remember the smell quite clearly.

Colleen said...

Yuck. I gag just thinking of that milk.

How can you be annoyed with your kid after another mom tells you how great they've been. That almost sucks. haha

2121212 said...

HA! I just have to laugh because you make it sound so comical, though, I'm sure it isn't at the time.

Just wanted to drop in a say HI since I've never commented before.

And, one more thing, I can't believe people comment and state the obvious. We should give out "OBVIOUS" awards. "Hey, lucky you! You are Mr. Obvious of the day! Thanks so much for joining us!" LOL

Sis Sarah said...

ROFL Means Rolling on the Floor laughing.


My daughter is famous for hiding pudding. The best example of this was the spoon covered in pudding that she hid under her pillow. I realized there was a problem because their was a swarm of ants going to and from her pillow.

Hope you were able to get the milk stink out of the backpack. I'm to whimpy and I would of gotten a new one.

Anonymous said...

Yes those are the days...That is why we do a gestapo check every day of ALL the back pack contents. My son stashed his hard boiled eggs in his back pack to eat on the way to school on the bus. Needless to say after several days of wondering why the front hall smelled odd, we did a back pack check of all of them hanging in the front hall closet. Nope..nothing. The smell was still there.
There was a lingering smell of sulfur around the front hall desk At long last I discovered a drawer in the desk a LONG LONG skinny one. Lo and behold there in the very back were the eggs, colored every so slightly green and black and tinged with mold. The stench about made me lose my breakfast.. That was the last time I let him take food to school. Now if he has NOT eaten breakfast in time (because he is fooling around) and he misses the bus , he then gets to pay me $1.00 to drive him! Hah that will teach him to stuff his breakfast in his backpack and leave it there. Not to mention he is a penny pinching miser at age 8 and can't stand to have to pay me to do anything. Meaning if he slow to do his chores, he has to pay mom big bucks, $10 a hour to do them for him! Amazing how fast he can get his rear in gear when he is motivated by $$. So the threat still works for now!
Adriana@Cassani.net

Becky said...

Ahhh yes, the "Mysterious contents" of a boys backpack. Who can know the mind of a boy? I, too, have found a separate biosphere in my son's backpack...which led me to discover that he'd been trading food again at school (which we don't allow). And yes, always in answer to my "Why?", I get, "I dunno."

How sweet that in finding that invitation in Jackson's backpack you found out about him having been so kind to that girl. What a little gentleman. That, combined with the experiments in the fridge, on the garage floor...reading encyclopedias...he's learning and soaking up knowledge like a sponge, and one day it will all pay off. Sounds to me like he's destined for greatness! ;0)

Mandi said...

Your experiences with the backpack, signing of the reading log, journal, and the spoiled milk is very much like my experiences. My wonderful child ate 1/2 an apple at lunch and then put it in his bag in case he got hungry later. Well about a week went by and I could not figure where the gnats were coming from. I think you know the rest. We love our kids don't we!!!!

Emily said...

Hey anonymous, it means Rolling On the Floor Laughing.
I love chocolate milk. That story was nasty in a funny way.

Teacherperson said...

What fun kids are! It's always a treasure hunt in the van, under the bed, and so on. We lose things, and we homeschool. I'd shudder to think what would happen if I let these people loose on the world with a backpack!

May God bless you today and this weekend! (And longer than that, too.)
~Mary
www.xanga.com/teacherperson

Matt & Cheryl Vetter said...

Hi Dawn, I've done the carrying a spare diaper and wipes in the car.... the only problem is you need to remember to change the spare diaper when your little one changes diaper sizes. We had an accident once, and I thought to myself, "No problem, I have a spare in the car", I thought I was mother of the year for that one.... however we were wearing a size 3 diaper at the time, and my 'spare' in the car was a size 1! There went my mother of the year award :) Oh well, I made that size 1 diaper work!

Anonymous said...

ROFL Means Rolling on the Floor Laughing.

A nice Blog reminds me of my 2 daughters ages 5 and 6. Thankfully we quite before they outnumber us.

Candace Salima (LDS Nora Roberts) said...

Mmmm. Sounds like your son and my nephews are twins.

Anonymous said...

Here's a link one of my friends sent me about all the things a mommy says to her kids in a day. I thought you might enjoy it. I love your blog and check in everyday just to see what y'all are up to. It's good I'm not alone in all this!
http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/ver/223/popup/index.php?cl=4274384

elephantschild said...

Just think, the fact that the milk had been in backpack for several days meant that it was no longer liquid enough to leak out over the encyclopedia.

Prior planning prevents inadvertent book purchases, I always say. Smart kid!

Anonymous said...

I don't know it you have ever heard "The Mom Song" but I think you would love it!!! I did. It is sung to the William Tell Overture, you can see it on YouTube. Hope you have a wonderful night.

MarshmallowMom said...

Haha!

Before becoming a writing/blogging phenomenon, what other things have you tried to earn money? Just curious. I'm sure you have some funny stories. I'm a mom of three looking at some part-time work now that I don't quite have diapers coming out of my ears anymore.

Julie said...

EEEWWWWW! Curdled milk! That was sick! I think that is even worse than finding a cockroach in my son's backpack.

Anonymous said...

I too, have gone all the way home for wipes and diapers before remembering that I ALWAYS have spares in my van. 14 brain cells indeed!

Anonymous said...

Hope garbage day is soon, rotten milk YUCK! I would have chucked the whole bag into the trash!

Heidi said...

Hi,

Thanks for sharing! I always love hearing your funny kids stories. :)

Also, I am very proud of your kind son. You must have taught him well!

stephanie said...

ROFL means Rolling on floor laughing.
or ROTFL rolling on the floor laughing

peach said...

what a good guy Jackson is... kudos to you young man~! My daughter is the kid who welcomes and helps new kids out and it makes me a proud mom so i am sure your mom is super proud of you too!
keep up the great work Dawn
love the blog it brightens my days

Colleen said...

OMG! At least you know your boy is sweet enough to help the new girl trying to get used to a regular school!

Don't feel bad about the choc. milk. I found one of my son's sippy cups in the back of my husband's trailblazer. It used to have some sort of orange or orange-blend juice in it. Since I am so cheap and didn't want to throw away an expensive Playtex Insulator cup (hey, it has BUZZ LIGHTYEAR on it!), I opened the damn thing and gagged and retched while I cleaned it 3 times before putting it in the dishwasher to be sanitized.
Love your blog, by the way...very funny. :D

K said...

My husband once told me that as a kid he decided to keep some snacks under his bed. Among these were a carton of milk and some ice cream. He was apparently shocked when the milk went bad and the ice cream melted and got ants in it. I guess he just didn't realize that they are kept in the fridge/freezer for a reason.

Peace is every step said...

That's just too funny that your little guy checks out world book encyclopedias......if mine finds this out, we're in trouble. He has enough little facts up there to clog my toilet (it takes a lot to clog my toilet, I've found).

I love hearing your tales & oh, how I can relate. :)

boyandgirl2 said...

I actually bring a bag of most EVERYTHING in the trunk...and most always forget it's there until we're out and I realize she outgrew size one diaper six months ago!

Lulu said...

Your son is so sweet. I think it does make up for the carton of spoiled milk! ;)

Carissa said...

Your son and my husband must have been cut from the same mold! He sounds like a mini version of my husband! More power to you (and start praying now for his wife!)!

Keeley said...

Hahaha! Groooosss. =D I remember those days.

Makes me sooo thankful we homeschool now. No icky gross bags, no forms turned in a gazillion years late, no frantic morning rush, no frantic afternoon rush...bliss. =)

Isn't it wonderful to hear good reports of our children. Makes you think you're not messing up as bad as you thought you were. =)

Anonymous said...

Dawn, my neighbor said I had to read your Ebay comment. We have seven kids seven and under and I can't tell you how often I feel like I am in a pun'ked series at the store! OK I have not actually seen a punked show becuase our toddler keeps breaking all the remotes. We have 7,5,5,4,3,18m and a new baby. Lots of fun but a crazy life too. So I am sending cosmic vibes of sisterhood from Minnesota to wherever you are! Deirdre Otis

nutralady2001 said...

Here's another computer acronym LSHISOTS....Laughed So Hard I Spat On The Screen which is what I've just done with my second cup of coffee for the day.

Oh the memories!! I am 59 now (soon to be 60....shhhh) and my children are now 31(DS),24 (DS),and 21(DD)so I am commenting from the lofty position of "been there done that" The things I used to find in their bags sometimes just defied description.

I remember when 31 yr old was 11,we had a slightly different problem.... he would walk to school at the end of the street.....we had just moved house....half way up the road was the Kindy so later I would walk 4yr old to Kindy with 1 yr old in the pusher.

Every day I would see this lunch thrown in the drain.After about the 4th day it suddenly twigged.......THIS WAS 11 YEAR OLD'S LUNCH! Of course I confronted him that night and after protesting he admitted it was. why?....answer ..."I don't know" I think they are born with that sentence implanted in their brains..I still to this day don't know why he was doing it...BOYS!( Now if he'd thought it through properly he would have got rid of it PAST the Kindy and I'd have been none the wiser)

Sounds like Jackson is such a sweetie!......and very much like my 24 year old both in behaviour (am constantly getting compliments about him to this day) and remembering invitations.

When we was 20 ( I'm sorry to burst your bubble but sometimes they don't get better about this as they get older) he was a groomsman at one of his best friend's wedding ( yes best friend got married at 20 the bride was 18)The night before the wedding he handed me an envelope....IT WAS AN INVITATION INVITING US TO THE WEDDING AS WELL.....I asked him how long he had had it...oh about 2 months.( why oh why did the parents entrust it to him, they should have known and posted it!)

It was too late to ring the parents of the groom who had invited us, I just had to rock up at the wedding the next day apologizing profusely for not RSVP'ing ..thankfully the reception was a buffet style and there were plenty of chairs and tables...not my finest social moment

AmandaMcGregor74 said...

Had to laugh about the passion of reading encyclopedias. My 6 year old son (yes 6) takes encycolpedias to bed with him to read for a while before lights out!! Ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

You know the best advice I ever read in an email that has helped me so much during my 3 pregnancies and bouts of morning sickness and brushing my teeth in the morning especially!

Smiling supresses the gag reflex!

No joke either lol! So next time you are faced with cleaning chocolate milk chunks out of a childs backpack remember to smile lol!

nutralady2001 said...

OK have just commented but gotta add..(had a memory flash)........when I was 6 years old my parents bought a set of encyclopedias.Wouldn't you know it I came down with the measles, the encyclopedias arrived and I wasn't allowed to read them until I was better.....yep I was one of those "take encyclopedia to bed" 6 year olds

Sarah said...

Not my children, but I discovered that if you leave an unopened plastic bottle of chocolate milk in your closed car under the Texas sun for an entire work day, it will explode. And stink. Praise God for those car wash places! I gave them a really big tip on top of the 75.00 I paid to have them clean my car.

Cheers,
Sarah
www.lachsara.blogspot.com

bigwhitehat said...

Same story with Zoe. Only instead of saying I don't know, she runs to her room crying.

Cynthia said...

I don't get here often and definitely not as often as I'd like; but ok, you just wrote about my week. Yep, we had a carton of chocolate milk in 7 year olds backpack.

Give your son a big pat on the back please! I have visually impaired children and when another child helps them it does the mean the world to them!!

Lisa Illichmann said...

ROFL.
It never gets any better - I can assure you that.
As of a certain age you just stop looking when it stinks. You just put the offending object/bag in their room and hope the dog doesn't get to it.

rainbowspirit said...

I have had the chocolate milk thing AND the late birthday party invitation thing both from my 7yo in the last couple of weeks... we are nearly twins!!

Syd said...

Unfortunately I too just recently had a "bad milk" experience except mine was my own fault. We recently went back to Memphis to finalize My Honey's adoption of my oldest girl. We traveled with all three kids and somewhere along the 7 hour drive the baby was given a bottle (that she threw in the floor and nobody retrieved it). That was on September 24th. When I got in the car YESTERDAY the smell hit me. I almost hurled in the backseat trying to find out where the stench was coming from. I finally located the bottle under the drivers seat and it was a complete solid mass of cottage cheese with a tiny bit of liquid and MOLD growing in the nipple. Needless to say, it AND my lunch both got "thrown" in the outside trash.

Also so sweet to hear about Jackson being so kind. My oldest had a little boy that was "challenged" that came to her regular class for about two hours each day. He was just a joy and she always asked if she could be the one to walk him back to his class. When I asked her why she wanted to be the one that helped him she said because some of the kids tease him but they knew she would beat them up so she had to walk with him to protect him. I didn't know if she was being kind or if she was looking for a fight but either way, she showed she had compassion and I was very proud.

http://dailytirade.blogspot.com

Brenda said...

Hmmpf. I figure it is some kind of marketing ploy by the backpack industry. They have people standing around in schools saying "here kid put this (insert smelly object) in your backpack. It will be fine." By the end of the year you HAVE to replace the backpack because it can't even come into the house.

bbstampin said...

Yikes! I'm glad I'm not alone in the "I don't know" responses. It's so frustrating! I'm guessing you have a budding genius, considering he studies encyclopias and all. Maybe putting the milk carton in his backpack was an experiment he got an idea from in the encyclopia. Did he happen to have the "M" edition for milk, "S" for spoiled, "C" for cheese or chunks, or "V" for vomit... you never know! You could have a scientist in your midst. LOL :)

Nicki said...

That's basically the equivalent to a sippy cup gone missing under the seat of the car! You mean to tell me things like this will happen for many years to come?? YIKES!

knitterykate said...

Love your writing style! Brings me back to the "good old days" of kids and backpacks.

DomesticGDS said...

OK, normally, I would share a story of my own that is similar to what's happened in your blog, but today I just want to say thanks. As a parent of a child with moderate autism I am just so greatful that there are kids like your son in the world. My greatest fear is teasing and bullying, but stories like that really give me such amazing hope. So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for raising such a caring and sensitive child.

Even if he does bring you spoiled chocolate milk. : )

Anonymous said...

Hi - Even tho I am a grandmother, I try to read your blog every day.
You have a wonderful sense of humor, which will keep you sane.

I couldn't find your blog from 10/5, is "smelly feet" your most recent?

Nina said...

When my DS was about 10 (old enough to know better) he put a plastic bottle of chocolate milk on his bedside table - next to the radiator. It is was in the run up to Christmas and I work in retail. I didn't go into his room for a few days. Until that is the chocolate milk exploded all over his bedroom, even then I only found out at bedtime when I came in from work

"Kreative Karma" said...

Hey!

Just got your link on eBay for the Pokemon cards... then another friend sent me your blog! It's nice to know we mothers are NOT alone! LOL! Have a great night!

Robin said...

Thanks for reminding us that we're all human. I don't feel so alone or stupid when I read about the same things happening to you that always seem to happen to me. = )

Anonymous said...

It was always scary going through my boys backbacks and pockets for that matter, bugs, rocks, old old food and sticky candy, Never chocolate milk though...


Julie

Colleen said...

I have seven kids so if I get the invitation it is unusual, if I remember to get a present anything more then two hours before the party and if I even remember the party I am amazed. Heck, I am happy if I remember to pick up my kid. Sometimes amongst the noise and chaos, I forget one is missing.

My kids are bad about cleaning out their backpacks as well. One time I found a half eaten sandwich that was left in a lunch box over summer break. We threw that one away.
crazysoccermom.blogspot.com

jenerekfamily said...

My favorite thing about your blog is that you don't sound like you are whining and complaining - you just use a bit of humor and sarcasm to make your point.

I also ALWAYS get the idea that you actually are amused by your children and are genuinely fond of them. I'm so glad you aren't up here berating them and telling the world how much you hate being a mother.

It seems that your point is more like, "Can you believe how hilarious little people are? Where do they come up with these things?" ...and I love it. Keep up the good work. Your kiddos are bound to grow into great big people.

Annjanette said...

Been checkin' your blog daily. Miss it. My guess is that you're busy with your project/s (and kids, of course). And I hope the absence is not from sickness.

We miss you.

Annjanette (e-Bamazon)

Nancy said...

Just put his bag in the fridge at night...?

I babysat for a couple kids every day when I was in high school. The girl would take a sip from a tiny carton of milk every day, decide she didn't want it, and stash it under the couch. I found them all one day, and they were quite chunky. It scarred me for life.

Dana said...

I'm an only child, but I think my parents had their hands full enough when I was a kid!! I used to check out encyclopedias from the library because Mom was the school librarian and I wanted to impress her with my reading skills.

I also can't forget the time I came home from Brownie camp and a scorpion crawled out of my backpack as my mom was unpacking it...I'll bet she would have much rather seen curdled chocolate milk at that moment!! I'm currently a nanny, and I still find ancient cheese sticks and PBJs in the 13-year-old's backpack...and sometimes, even in the 18-year-old's bag!! :D

Candace Salima (LDS Nora Roberts) said...

Dawn - I just dropped back by - sorry I'm posting twice on the same post. I wanted to share:

There are 23 days left and counting, ladies . . . if you have the most wonderful husband in the world, you need to nominated him!

I know there are other wonderful husbands out there. Until midnight November 30, 2007 I will be taking nominations via this email address ces@candacesalima.com. The six finalists will be posted, please send a picture with the nomination, on December 1, 2007 when voting will commence and the winner will be chosen by you. Sadly, because it would just be skewed, my husband cannot win although I think he'd be a shoe in. On December 15, 2007 the winner will be announced.

We have some great husbands already nominated, but I know there are more out there. So start nominating! Tell me about your husband and why you think he is the Best Husband in the World! That would be world . . . ladies, no geographic boundaries.

TwiLightLi said...

Congratulations on raising a great kid. I teach high school, and acts like Jackson's are one of the reasons I go to work every day.

Anonymous said...

hello? you haven't blogged since Thursday. where are you?

stephanie said...

LOL! that is so funny! (sorry)

Anonymous said...

When my brother was in high school, he is now 33. He was also working full time. My mom and I went downstairs (his room was at the bottom of the stairs)to finish laundry and there was a stinch. We started to search his room. He was usually a good person so mom did not mind looking through his room to find what ever had died. His girlfriend had showed up a little early as he was due to get off work soon and she was also helped us look as she too could not believe the smell. Yes the room was that messy that it took three of us to find the cup of soured hot chocolate that was hidden under his bed tucked up under his headboard! He didn't want to get in trouble for leaving the cup in his room and not take it to the kitchen. We soaked the cup but made him clean it as soon as he got home. He still has not lived it down.

Meagan said...

Now, you all laugh about your kids leaving foodstuffs in their packs...well I have a husband that does that! I am constantly missing Tupperware, my good dishes, even silverware. I've opened up his truck only to be slapped in the face with the stench of semi-clean dissecting kits (he's a bio teacher and for some reason that I can't quite figure out they are in his truck vs. his classroom).

Nothing like the smell of rotting frog flesh in the morning!

He claims to clean it out each semester but I find his "cleaning" in piles in the garage - the circling fruit flies give it away. I have found all kinds of treasures - forms that should have been filled out months ago(teachers have them too!), sports uniforms, 500 red pens, MY favorite college sweatshirt that I thought I left somewhere but in reality, he wore and never returned, and many more great finds. Needless to say, I still love him dearly...he's just forbidden to take leftovers to work..."Here honey, here's five bucks, buy yourself something nice for lunch!"...

Thanks again for the laughs, Dawn!

MP

Terri H said...

I love the book "Squid will always be Squid" by John Sciezka. In there, you will find a wonderful tale of grasshopper, grasshopper-mom and "I don't know."

have fun.

Kiteria said...

I wish I could say I've never seen curdled chocolate milk... and fossilized food that lives under the sofa cushion.. but I have, and my life is forever changed.

The really funny part is that we have a black lab who functions as a garbage disposal (so much as we will let her). WHY does it not occur to him to feed the unwanted food to the dog... like a normal kid?

At my mom's house he actually stuffed a bologna sandwich up under the countertop in the area where the shims are to make the countertop level. The dog told on him for this one... she couldn't quite get that last piece of bologna out.

Kathleen
Casselberry, FL

Anonymous said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W95Y8hNQiH8


I hope this link works for ya. Anita is so funny. She speaks at for a little conference called
"Women of Faith." Okay, it's not a little conference really!
Here is her website, just in case this link doesn't work.
www.anitarenfroe.com
I am wondering if I can sing this song to our four little girls every morning and just stay silent the rest of the day? I often get tired ofhearing my own voice! Ya know? Of course you do!

Anonymous said...

A great blog would be what goes into the trash can at your home. I can't imagine the amount of garbage, child things and just trash that gets put out each week! Lots of family = lots of trash!

Rose said...

first of all, i love the look of your new blog! very classy. and just wanted to let you know that if you leave milk out long enough, it will start to smell like a dead animal. i learned that from the sippy cup that i found under my bed several months ago with SOLID "homemade" cheese inside it. i do not know how long it had been there and we no longer have that cup.

Rotgut McCoy said...

Yeah I recently had a run in with old milk. The state of NC seized my vehicle on my way home with a full shopping trips worth of groceries in the trunk. By the time I played the I-don't-know game with the entire police department, several towing companies, and the DMV, two weeks had gone by. And if you think it's hot up there in chicago, just add ten degrees for NC.

When I made it out to reclaim my personal possessions the gallon of milk had actually grown tentacles and lunged at me when I went to remove it from my trunk. I fought it off with the trident I carry with me at all times, but not before the smell which exploded from my trunk killed several passersby. The good news, I salvaged Ricky the Raccon, a stuffed racoon which was ran over by a friends friends father on his way home from some bar and passed down in all his scruffy, slightly odiferous glory to it's current proud owner. Thank God for the little things right?

Adrian said...

I know that EXACT smell of rotten chocolate milk. It must be one of the nastiest smells of all time! You have my great admiration for being able to clean it up without barfing - ugh!

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