Wednesday, September 26, 2007

ONE MILLION!

One million is the number of hits I've had on this blog in just over a month!

One million is the number of diapers I've changed in the past (almost) thirteen years. Ok, so maybe I haven't changed quite a million, but I figure at a conservative 4 diapers a day, and an average of 3 years per child (except for Brooklyn who has only had 1 1/2 years of diaper changes), I've changed over 24,000 diapers. I was going to figure out how much I've spent on diapers, but I decided it would probably be too depressing. And don't bother to write and tell me that I should've used cloth diapers because there was NO WAY I was going there.

One million is the amount of money it cost for Lee Majors bionic arms. (The rest of his body was five million, of course.)

One million is the number of months I've been pregnant or breastfeeding. Again, perhaps I'm exaggerating just a tiny bit. Let's see... I guess it's about 103 months, or roughly 8 1/2 years.

One million is the number of pieces that fall in The Newsboys' song (on the right of this blog.)

One million is the number of times my son has told me that he's bored today.

One million is the number of cribs recalled by Simplicity/Graco. Have you heard about this? If I understand correctly, this is their third recall of cribs! The number of children's products recalled recently is ridiculous. Not only did children die/get seriously injured in these cribs, but the manufacturer apparently took more than two years before recalling the defective beds. If you have one of these cribs, stop using it immediately and please pass this information along to anyone you know who may have one of these cribs. This recall includes models that were manufactured as far back as nearly ten years ago! Anyone could have one of these, could have passed one on to a friend or relative, or could have one packed away.
I don't have this problem as my baby is a spoiled brat who has all of us wrapped around her little finger and she sleeps with me. Shhhh.

One million is the number of calories I've consumed today.

One million is the number of times my daughter has asked me to get her some shampoo today.

One million is the number of times I've told my son to settle down in the last hour.

One million is the answer to this problem D { ( f (x) ) ² } = 2f (x) D { f (x) } = 2f (x) f ' (x). Ok, so I don't really know the answer to this problem. In fact my eyes started to bleed when I looked at it. But I'm pretty sure it could be one million. I hope nobody actually likes math enough to figure this problem out just for fun, (math/fun, now there's an oxymoron!) but I somehow know that I'll get a comment tomorrow with the answer.

One million is the number of tears my son has cried over his "best friend" Bahama, the hermit crab.

The gravestone that my oldest son made for Jackson's crab. He found the wood in the garage and covered it with White Out for that lovely antiquey look.

His little coffin

The baby saw Jackson crying and kept walking over and giving him hugs. Awwwww.
Of course, a little later, she climbed up onto the kitchen table and nearly bit Jackson's hand off trying to get to the Cheerios from him, but hey, you take the good with the bad, right?

114 comments:

Becky said...

Awwww...so sweet, little sister giving big brother a compassionate hug. LOL on the good with the bad. That is so like kids!

What a sweet family you have. And congrats on the ONE MILLION hits on your blog! Whoot! Whoot!

nutralady2001 said...

Maybe I'll be the first commenter this time :)

We've had funerals for pets , stood in the rain once as we buried a beloved pussy cat everyone cried including my husband.

Nothing wrong with your babies sleeping with you. My number 3 was a high needs baby (emotionally she need lots of hugs/touching.) We bought a king sized bed to accomodate us all ( 5 in total) The book that saved my sanity and told me it was OK to do this was "Night Time Parenting" by Dr William Sears. This was 20 years ago. I hope it's still in print. My mother would give me a hard time and I'd say "Well they won't be sleeping with us when they're 12".........and they weren't!

I called our house musical beds at night time, a lot of the time no-one woke up in the bed they went to sleep in we didn't care as long as everyone slept that was the most important thing

ps congratulations on hitting the 1,000,000 mark !!

MKB said...

1,000,000!!!
HOORAY!!
To think that this all started with some Pokemon cards!!

My 10-year old is still trying to wrap his brain around the fact that you had $140-some as your final bid on a stack of cards!!!!

Look forward to your posts everyday.

Matchbox Mom said...

One Million will be the number of times I will read your book!! I'm too excited.

Tami

Katrina said...

Aww, that's so cute with the little gravestone and such.

Congratulations with your 1 million hits!

A Whole Lot of Nothing said...

One million thanks is what I'm giving you for allowing me to advertise on your site.
Love the hugs pic. Kids have it in them to be sweet.

http://awholelotofnothing.net

Anonymous said...

Woo hoo on the milestone!!
That was too cute about the little "tombstone" and"coffin."

Courtney said...

You gotta love when your kids fight all day with each other and then they turn angelic and show their love for each other. It is quite confusing. I am trying to figure out what light switch I hit to make them fight and which one makes them calm and loving. Once I figure that out I'll let you know :)

VanDerHoekArt said...

R.I.P. Bahama

My condolences to Jackson.

I lost a hermit crab as a kid. I remember crying into my spaghetti dinner that night.

sonic7 said...

I hope that you get this. I'm new to this whole blog process, so bear with me. I've been wanting to talk to you since someone sent me an email (the story about your visit to the grocery store), because it reminder her (my friend) of my family!! We have 7--4 boys, and 3 girls. We have SO much in common, and a lot of what you said really hit home! I had my last one (March of 2006)when I was almost 40 years old! He was a surprise, and I did hate my husband for a little while--it was all HIS fault!! Thank goodness I finally got over getting "fat" again, and looked forward to having him. He was a whopper--11 lbs. 2oz!!! Can you say C-section?!! I look forward to reading your blogs, and to talking with you! Take care!

Jennifer said...

And if everyone of those visitors to your fabulous blog went to www.galtogalwalk.org, paid $3 and joined the virtual walk to raise money for breast cancer patients .... imagine the money that would be raised!!!!

Sorry about the crab. We had one of those too. No matter what we did, it was just too cold in Wisconsin for that old crab.

Mom of 4 said...

Congrats on your 1 million hits. I hope some day to be that popular on my blog! I love reading about your kids. At least I know I am not the only one with kids that do strange/weird & stupid stuff!

Keep on blogging & may the force be with you ! LOL

Jill said...

Don't tell, but my son is spoiled rotten too: he's 3 years old and still sleeps with me! ;) I don't mind, I like to snuggle.

The tombstone and coffin are both cute but incredibly sad. Poor guy.

Madeline Hallock (Maggie) said...

well, it is 11:30pm and i just got done working on what i call my therapy, although, after tearing a few pieces of paper, lightly swearing and being told by my daughter that i was crazy for talking to myself...i am not sure.

i had been told my my bff to watch oprah tonight (at 11:00pm because i have a 9-5 job), but alas, it is just too late, i have already missed half of it, so i decided to catch up on some reading before i roll into bed with my hubby and the baby...(buddy, the rat terrier, who thinks we share a bed with him, instead of the other way around). i have to say reading your blog was a much better choice, i laughed so hard and besides i hear oprah cries on the show today, not to downplay the theme of the show, it's just that a good laugh before bed is always best. well, enough jabering (typing). have a great night. signoff-maggienstamps@comcast.net

Stacie said...

No appologies for kids sleeping in our beds, they make good pillows right? That's what I have convinced myself of after two horizontal sleepers. You are a joy and a blessing, and I know God is moving on your behalf, HE will direct your path one million times and more. Bless you~stacie

Carissa said...

Wow 1,000,000 hits! What a milestone!

Victor said...

Wow thats a lot of diapers!


;) rip bahama

Lastel / STAMPINSTEL said...

Hi Dawn ,
I have been reading you blog every day for the past month I think , after someone sent me a link to your ebay auction . Love your stories , most of them remind me of my childhood , I am the second of six children , 3 sisters and 2 brothers . I am positive my mom would relate to all of your stories . I sent her a link to your blog but not sure if she has visited it yet . Congrats on the over 1 million hits , can't wait to read your book when it comes out . I think it is awesome you are getting all the attention you deserve . Big hugs to you !

bigwhitehat said...

Outstanding. Keep riding this wave.

bigwhitehat said...

I meant the wave of hits.

Stay out of the wave Bahama just rode.

LilBit said...

Oh. My. Gosh. That picture of your kids hugging brought tears to my eyes. (Too bad that peace doesn't last, yeah?)

Griffee's said...

Holy crap lady you kill me. you remind me so much of my family it's ridiculous. I describe them as a little bit of my big fat greek wedding and a huge italian family...funny part we are not italian or greek. we are a big family who are Mormon..NO NOT PILIGIMIST!!!...and we laugh a lot and lately at your blog. thank you for giving us something to call each other in the middle of the day while we should be working, changing diapers, cooking, cleaning, what have you to have a good laugh. We love it.

Holly Maudsley said...

Hi Dawn,
Stand proud that your baby sleeps with you! Mine does too. It's nature's way, and the way most people around the world sleep. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Love your blog - look forward to it everyday!

IBreakCellPhones said...

Re: the math problem.

Someone has to do it.

All that is is one of the rules of calculus. To take the derivative of a function of X squared, multiply the value of the function of X times 2, then multiply that by the derivative of the function of X. Now, where'd you get that?

Jenn loves Derek said...

Hi Jackson!
Usually I write to your mom, but tonight I am going to right to you. My name is Jennifer and I live in Utah. I also have a son name Jaxon. He is a great kid and he is 6 and he loves hermit crabs. His baby Turtle ranaway. (Some one put the turtle on the grass to play with him. And Fred, our turtle was very small. And we found out fast. He was gone in a matter of seconds. It has been 5 months since Fred left us. and it was hard. We cried because we knew how much Jaxon loved the turtle. And we loved him too. I hope that your saddness will be lifted by the knowledge that you got to take care of a pet that needed you. And Bahama knew you were going to feed him and play with him. Bahama was very lucky to have a friend like you taking care of him.

Well, if you need a laugh here is a funny tombstone story:For Christmas, my daughter, Meg wanted one of those "Fur Real Chimps". Lucky for her Santa delivered! This Monkey looks fairly realistic, makes monkey noises and even sniffs for it's food. (It fits right in at our house, even though we have no "pets" just kids.)
Later that afternoon I asked Meg, "So what are you going to name your monkey?" (She names everything) She replied without hesitation, "Foo-Foo." I was startled a bit by this answer. Why? My childhood nickname was Foo-Foo. Meg knew that was my nickname and thought it would be so great to name the monkey after me. I was freaked out and flattered all at the same-time. Mostly freaked out! I mean come on, here she has all of these pretty Dolls and she names the Hairy Monkey that SNIFFS IT"S FOOD, after me!! I think I would of felt less self conscience if she would have named Malibu Barbie after me." (I am a size 18, so my likeness to Barbie would have been a little easier on the ego.) "Are you sure you want to name it Foo-Foo? How about Sophie or Fifi?" I asked "No, I like Foo-Foo." She quickly smiled and skipped off. I decided, it could be worse and forgot about it.
A few days later, her younger brother, Ryan aka Twitchy, got hold of the monkey and got up on the top bunk and decided to see if , "Foo-Foo" could fly. Meg walked in just as "Foo-Foo" took flight. Ofcourse it was a no-go on the flying and Meg was horrified as she picked up that Hairy thing and it would not move, talk or sniff. Meg was very unhappy and when she is unhappy we all know about it! (Because she is her mother's daughter.)
My Husband went in to her room ten minutes later to see if she was calmed down and to see if he could fix the chimp. When he walked in he saw a pile of blankets lying in a mound on Meg's bed. On top of the mound sat a home-made tombstone that read, "Here Lies Foo-Foo". Now I don't know about you, but it is a little disconcerting when you have a tombstone in your house with your name on it!!! Thankfully Derek, my hubby was able to revive the hairy little thing with a tightening of it's batteries. Meg was thrilled and I was beyond happy to throw away the Tombstone!

Arah said...

I just love your blog. I come from a big family as does my husband (I am #4 of 6 and my husband is #6 of 6). Your blog brings back so many memories of my childhood. I admire you for finding all the funny things your children do rather than letting those things become a reason for punishment (although I am sure that you have your moments). Thank for the good laughs and the memories!

Kristen said...

My son sleeps with me too. Good for you! Dr. Sears is still in print, and one of the reasons I don't feel bad that my son does sleep with me.

Alice said...

One million is the number of times you made me smile within the past month!! Let's go for two million!!

jodi said...

1 million...you go, girl!!!

Anonymous said...

Your mathematical problem contains a solution. The problem is D { ( f (x) ) ² }, and the solution is 2f (x) f ' (x). It is not a number problem, so its answer is not a number.

My name is Tammie said...

Poor baby! I am so sad for him! He loved Bahama so much. Poor little honey.

Oh and your site is uploading much much faster! Love it!

suburbancorrespondent said...

I try to rationalize that I'll make up for using all the plastic diapers by recycling a lot of other stuff when I am older. I tried the cloth diaper thing, I really did. A number of times, in fact. But, well, they leak. And the poop aspect is gross. And I had to wash them (as if 22 loads of laundry a week wasn't enough already). So forget it. But I'd never try counting up all the diapers I've added to the landfill - I'd feel too guilty. Especially since I don't seem to be able to toilet train a kid properly until they're, say, 10 and a 1/2.

Kim said...

So sorry about Bahama. I do so feel for you. As I read your blog yesterday and lamented about how sensitive my daughter is, little did I know that her cat had passed away and was hiding in my sewing room just feet away from this computer. I found him later that day right before she got home from school. Was not a fun day but as yours was yesterday we had a funeral, her brothers made her little cards which was very sweet and we shed lots of tears. Even me. I liked the fat cat quite a bit. Ok, not to bring you down anymore. Love your blog and please keep us laughing. It helped me get through my rough day yesterday.

cakeburnette said...

yah...our crab coffins looked very similar.

I realized after I read several posts that you probably should have waited a couple of days to make sure he hadn't just molted. Our murderous crab did that; he molted and we thought he was dead. He also hung out with any shell for a while, which was creepy. Hermit crabs do not look good naked.

Alexis Jacobs said...

I remember when my daughter's hermit crab died. They surely aren't very hardy pets. RIP Bahama.

Congrats on the 1 mil hits!

Vicki & Bruce said...

Every one of my 11 kids slept with me (and my husband) and they all turned out quite normal! Every kid is afraid of the dark and needs security and they mature and move into their own bed (or with another sibling!). You are very real and transparent! Looking forward to your book!

Amber said...

1,000,000 is the amount of smiles your writing has produced. Only this # I am NOT exagerating. It's probably more ;) Blessings!

l. king said...

I'm still so sorry to Jackson. I still cry when one of mine dies. I have 13, I know, it's crazy, but I love them! Give him hugs and kisses for all of us.
Congrats on 1,000,000. I can't wait for your book.

Brenda said...

I don't miss the million diapers but I miss those sweet baby hugs. They need to find away to send baby smells over the web.

Judy W. said...

There's an old saying. "Let your children be dependent on you and they'll grow up to be independent". I agree with you regarding the bed situation. There are opinions on both sides. I set up our sleeping arrangements with a cradle up against our bed. When either of mine were hungry I'd simply haul them in with us (king size bed), nurse them and, if I was lucid enough, put them in the cradle. If not, what the heck! They were warm cuddly and smelled so good! They both grew up to be independent, resourceful, and compassionate adults.

I say you're doing all the right things so far!

The Rocking Pony said...

One million. No wonder parents are tired at the end of the day after dealing with the million requests, breaking up a million fights, wiping a million noses more or less. I'm tired already!

Katie said...

I'll admit that I did start figuring out the calculus problem as soon as I saw it. What can I say, I'm a dorky engineer! (blush)

But the answer to the problem is already there after the 2nd equals sign ;-) It's kind of like saying
2 + 2 = 3 + 1 = 4

Dana said...

My husband last night was trying to find different patterns in the number nine multiplications. How sick is that!!!!! He said it was FUN???? So I am quite sure you will have someone solve that problem for you. When I looked at it I literally went cross eyed. But then again maybe that was becuase of my new glasses. Enjoy the sweetness your children share. They are few and far between!! Dana

Danielle said...

You got ads! I'm sure I'm just slow and didn't notice until today but yay google! You're gonna be rich!

Still deliriously happy for you. :)

Anonymous said...

I feel compelled to leave the requiste comment on your math formula. You are correct the answer COULD be one million but as of now it is undefined because it's just the definition of a derrivative (yay calculus!) and the actual function (where you plug in numbers to get an answer) is undefined.

Also yes, math can be fun. Though I prefer to think of it as more satisfying than fun. What else can you do and actually get a RIGHT answer that is THE right answer and has no ambivalence about it.

Angie said...

Oooh, my comments are working. I think this is my favorite post, yet. Well, since yesterday but whatever. Charlie sleeps with me, too. We all sleep through the night that way. Whatever works, right? Congrats on your 1 million hits! That is fantastic.

Tina said...

LOL- math/fun=oxymoron! Oxymoron is one of our favorite words...one night dh was sounding contradictory when describing something and dd said "Dad, is that one of those 'special kind of morons'?" Now when we don't get what he's saying we lovingly call him a 'special kind of moron'. (gee, why don't the kids show respect to their father?...)
Thanks for the laughs!
Tina (sahm of 5)

Tiffany said...

WOW 1 Million! I would like to have 1 Million in my bank account! How nice of your son to make the gravestone for jacksons crab. Love the last picture of Brooklyn giving him a hug. How sweet!

Mich said...

Awww, a crab funeral. Poor Jackson - and how sweet of his baby sis to hug him better.

I'm appalled by all the children's recalls lately. I'm almost afraid to buy anything!

Abi said...

Congratulation on the million hits. So how does it feel to be just SOOOO famous..? Same as you did before seeing as you are still doing laundry huh?
So this is kind of a dumb question, but I am English (not that that has anything to do with it.. well maybe it has actually) and I am dying for a great (or even just a really good) Meatloaf recipe. I know, I know I could look it up on the internet, but I've done that before and the kids have just looked at me sideways and said, "What's this??". So I thought the best person to ask would be a professional. That would be YOU. Hey with six kids and a husband to feed you MUST have a meatloaf recipe up your sleeve somewhere.. All this because last night I started to fry my mince, only to come back 10 minutes later to find it had shrunk and I could see more pan than mince... so I added peppers, lentils, onion, peas and corn to try and 'beef it up' (excuse the pun) a little, only to serve it up and have the kids say, why do you put so many vegetables in the mince..?? My daughter had to eat hers with a glass of water, taking a fork of food and swig of water.. Not nice to know this is how your kids get their food down their necks..
So please, any chance of a meatloaf recipe..?
Thanks - and by the way, you are bookmarked as a favourite and I check in every day with you. You go girl (that's American speak right?)
Thanks again.

Alicia said...

And that last picture makes it all worth it! When I am at my wits end, mine will pull something like this... and it makes it worth while... at least for abotu 30 mins. or so!

Irishmama said...

Dawn - After you book, appearances etc. I hope we can say

ONE MILLION - the amount of money posting the silly Pokemon cards on eBay eventually earned Dawn (aka mom2my6pack)

I'll catch you on the Pennsylvania stop of your book tour.

My sincere condolences to Jackson on the loss of his beloved hermit crab.

Colleen said...

I have three kids. Two are mine, one from a previous relationship, one with my currently relationship, and one that is from my bf's previous relationship. Hope you got that one. LOL

Anyway, I know that three kids isn't anything compared to your six but the oldest, 6, (my bf's from the previous) is autistic and hes more like 2 kids or so. My bf and I have only been seeing eachother for a little over a year. Granted, we've known eachother since grade-school and have dated before we ever had kids. So I've had to get used to having an autistic child. But I will tell you, its very rewarding. I love that child just as much as I love my own. My two are 4 and 4 months. So I have my hands full a bit. My bf and I get no 'us' time. And I sure as heck don't get any 'me' time. (I believe you posted something about that in a previous blog)

Anyway, the whole point to this comment was to tell you how much you are appreciated. I truly look forward to reading your blogs daily. Give Jackson our regards. I remember having to bury beloved pets. (I don't think the hermit falls into the flushable category, sorry)

Keep up the great work, and I can't wait until you finish your book. I will definitely get one!

Colleen, 23, Ohio

Anonymous said...

YAY DAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Congrats on the 1,000,000!!! Oh and matchbox mom are you mormon? I'm mormon, and you said that you had a funeral and you sang god be with you till we meet again. And that is a LDS song.

Nicole said...

One Million Hits!?!? That's amazing! Congrats!

I thought you and your devoted readers might be interested in this: www.lost.eu/677c8 . It's an experiment to show how curiosity and creativity can link thousands of people together in unique and interesting ways. Log in- it's fun!

I love your blog- I read it daily. Always a good way to start my morning. And I love the picture of Brooklyn giving Jackson hugs because he was sad. Too cute! I hope he feels better soon.

Emily said...

Those pictures are so sweet! What nice kids you have. And I hate to be the nerd, but the math problem is an equation that's true for all differentiable f(x). So I guess 1M could be an answer. Ugh. I make myself sick.

Kate said...

Congrats on hitting one million! Your children are so adorable. :o)

Katy said...

I really think you'd appreciate this if you haven't seen it already.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

Cate said...

My very own version of Spaz (Taylor is 3 too, so I keep getting a heads up of things to come from you with your blog) has been sleeping with us since he was an infant. There is an incredible amount of guilt and shame loaded on families who make that choice. Dr. Sears also helped me to feel bettter about my choices in raising my son.

I once told my M-I-L that I'd prefer to look back and wish I'd held and comforted my son less than the other type of regret.

My son is a very loving, and fiercely independant child. He also knows that if he gets scared at night, he can crawl into a safe place with Mommy and Daddy.

Waitingonyou2 said...

Dawn,

Thanks for posting daily. Most days your website is second to air!

I went to the St. Jude's site on your website to make a small donation and noticed the minimum is $10? Perhaps, that's a deterrent for some? Any pledge, even the $1 per hit, would be beneficial, however some can not part with $10.

I look forward to your book. Keep up the good work! :D

Jedivett said...

Wow! I've been reading your blog since the infamous pokemon card sale on ebay. Dude, I don't know how you do it! And with a sense of humor to boot! I only have 2 children, girls, ages 5 and 2. Hubby travels every week so we do the 'single mom' thing during the week and I dump as much as I can in hubby's lap on the weekends. We both decieded that 2 was definitely enough!

I'm alos a vet and heard every horror or sob story known to man about pet antics and their unfortunate passing. Overall, the experience is good for kids, provided that they are old enough to understand it and have loving parents to help them through it. I have no doubt that Jackson will be OK, thanks to his stellar mom!

Love the blue stains on Brooklyn's face! I've been there and I don't even have the excuse of 5 other kids to distract me. My oldesy had a similar mishap before we'd even had our second child!

I'm looking forward to the book! Congrats on your million hits mark. Love the sarcasm!!

KARA said...

how cute for the hugs always nice to see kids not stabbing each other in the eye or something.
I love the post very fun, trust me I can imagine it felt like 100 nappies and disposable rule.
kara
xx

Julie Pretz said...

Congratulations on your 1 million hits! :) I send your son warm thoughts as he grieves for his friend. :(
Enjoy the moments of compassion in between the arguments.

Alice said...

Subject: This is funny!

This is really cute --- made for mom’s.





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY



Click on this link..it will make you smile!

I couldnt help but pass this along-

Rick said...

One Million - the number of times I've thought, or said out loud... "Mmmm chocolate! Good!' Congratulations.

Alta said...

One million is the number of times I can totally relate to your life! :-)

-Alta

Paul*HolleeAnn*Jordan said...

one MILLION!!!??? wow, that is amazing. but i guess i am one of the many random people who stumbled upon your blog and checks it daily for a dose of giggles.

HolleeAnn
http://thevasquez3.blogspot.com/

Sylvia said...

Co-sleeping and breastfeeding too? Wow, you just got even better in my book (and you were already way up there)!

We've been through two cat deaths and a great-grandpa who passed away in the last year. For a while, every dinner without fail involved a conversation started with by my three year old about death, dying and "going into the hole". She even played burying her dolls for a while! It's a little...well...morbid but I'm so glad we had these experiences to open up conversations about our faith and how it is OK to be sad or mad or scared. We were able to talk about how we'd see Grandpa again because he believed in Jesus and would be in heaven and maybe the cats would be there too.

Anonymous said...

Dawn,

You are an amazing woman!! I absolutely love your writing. I do hope you publish a book. You are the next Erma Bombeck!!!! Every mom, even if you only have 1 child would buy your book. Your writing had me laughing out loud. Just wanted to tell you that!!!

Terri

Dominoe said...

Your eyes started to bleed? BWAHAHAHAHA!! Oh that's too funny! I'm gonna use that someday. :)

Christine in NJ said...

Dawn -

please VIEW this!... BECAUSE I SAID SO is the final tag, it is LOL funny... I read your blog RELIGIOUSLY and absolutly love it and totally identify... YES, I am a "crazy" stay-at-home mom too and we have LOTS in common. Keep up the amazing writing... & THANK YOU
...
Christine in NJ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

Teacherperson said...

What a delight it has been to read your blog! I am thrilled for the attention your humor has been getting. We all have crazy things in our lives, but it is such a delight to find someone else who finds them just as funny as I do.

May God bless you!
Mary
(www.xanga.com/teacherperson)

thornfaith said...

Wow thank you so much for posting the recall for the crib!!! I own one with the old hardware!!! Luckily it was installed correctly but I still have to get the new hardware, I am so saddened by this!!! I am just glad I wanted some amusement/life lessons on what 'not' to do :-) from your posts or I might have never known.

Faith~~

Heather said...

So funny, I was changing my son for the "millionth" time yesterday, and I started thinking about how many diapers you have changed. That helped me put stuff into perspective. The fact that Trevor will be 4 in January and has yet to master this last milestone into big boy territory, is something I can handle. The fact that he pointed to a beautiful actress on tv last night, and inquired, "Hey, mommy, that's you, skinny?" led me to dream all night long about using my long-forgotten gym membership...

I have become addicted to your blog, along with one million (probably more!) others! You're awesome!

Rick said...

The video link to YouTube for Mom was great - I recommend it.

Bigmammy said...

This is a comment to your son from my 10 year old who just lost his guinea pig last week. We have also lost 3 hermit crabs in the past.
Amy -mom to 4
Hello. I lost a pet too. his name was Squeakers the guinea pig. I still cry about him and he died a week ago
I hope you get better.
Mahlon Morton
6th gr.

Bald Headed Geek said...

1,000,000 is the number of laughs I get from reading your blog! :-)

BHG

Anonymous said...

Hey Dawn,
do you think that you could show us your *darling* little princess's haircut? :)

MarshmallowMommy said...

I love your take on cloth diapers, and am dumbfounded by the number of months/years you've been pregnant/nursing. I had four years in a row and that was more than plenty for me! You are in a completely different league, and thus so well qualified to write this hilarious blog!! :-)

Nelly said...

I'm sorry, I'm also one of the people who understood the equation. It's not my fault, it's 5 years of engineering school that have messed me up. Also...and I am ashamed to admit it, I like math. Really. I always have. I understood my older siblings' algebra homework when I was 8. It just makes sense you know...it's logical...there's always an undeniable, provable truth and I like that in a chaotic world. Probably why I never could get into religion...too little proof, too little logic and too much faith demanded of me.

Faith said...

Don't you just love some of the looks you get from people when they hear that your little one sleeps in your bed! My two year old has been in our bed for most of his life, but my three month old sleeps in her room! There are days when I feel guily that she is all alone, but she doesn't seem to mind!

Azzia said...

Dawn I found the theme song for your sitcom (hint hint ABC)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

Sherri said...

And, YOU are one in a million, Dawn. I have spent the last hour reading your eBay ads, all the wonderful commentary and your responses, and now, your blog.

I will recommend your book to our local book club when it is released. In this world that has gotten much too serious and politically correct, you are a breath of fresh air. If Tampa Bay is on your tour, I love to have you come speak at our library.

I've got you bookmarked now and will be checking in every day.

Give Jackson another hug and tell him I think the tombstone is just beautiful.

Sherri in Tarpon Springs, FL

Anonymous said...

With all the nice charity links you have on your page, most of which i click daily. There is one I would like you to look into. Its Kidd's Kids from Kidd Kraddick In the Morning. I am not sure if he is syndacate there, but here is his website. www.kiddlive.com , the link to his charity is www.kiddskids.com. Every years listerners donate and send 20-40 families with children who are terminal or have hard to live with problems, to Disney World for a chanced to leave all the hospitals and dr.'s behind and enjoy life for a week. I really encourage you to check it out. I cry everytime they tell another parent on the show that they are going to Disney World.Plus they are the BEST morning show around, lol.

Andrea
andreadasing@cox.net

Meg said...

Just because you posted it, I thought I would be a smart alec and send this in an email to my darling husband who is phD mathematics.
Here is his reply:
Megan,
This isn't a problem to be solved... This is a general formula
expressing what is known in calculus as the "chain rule", which in fully
generality (for 1-variable functions) states:

D{ g( f(x) ) } = g'(f(x)) f'(x).

In this case, g(x) = x^2. So, g'(f(x)) = 2x, plugging in f(x) for x, we
get 2f(x).

What is this from, though?


I might have not told him it was a silly thing from a blogsite.... :) Smiles!
Megan

whimseycreations said...

This is not nearly as funny as you but a friend sent it to me today and it fits right in with your theories on motherhood! LOLOLOL Do take the 3 minutes to listen (if you can spare them LOL).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

Nancy72 said...

"One million is the number of times my son has told me that he's bored today."

By an amazing stroke of luck I was able to come up with the perfect response to "I'm bored!"...you never hear it repeated...at least not immediately...;o)

I just tell whoever that they are "much too intelligent to be bored". Worked every time for me!!!

Jennifer said...

Congrats on one million!

Katie said...

You wouldn't save money with cloth diapers. First you start out with the cheap ones, then move up the chain to really nice prefolds, then you see all those cute AIOs and pocket diapers, then you start seeing diapers you can't live without, I mean that your baby can't live without. It becomes an addition and you've spent twice as much on throw away diapers. Its a horrible addiction since they just end up pooping in your expensive diapers, again, I mean their diapers. So you might have actually saved money and not enter rehab.

Leila said...

Congratulations on the millionth hit. I know that your book is going to be a success.

Esther said...

!*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_**__*_*_**_*_*_*__**_ You have to see this clip on YouTube. Please pass it on to all the mothers who read your blog as well. Love it!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

An English Mum said...

Wow! That's amazing - Congratulations!

And thanks for the lovely comments - well chuffed I made you laugh, and sorry if my english-isms confused you!!

Sheila K said...

Dear Dawn,
I have to tell you I have spent all day today just reading your blog and I really appreciate you... You remind me of my life although I only have 3 kids... I have laughed today so much and so hard that I have wet my pants, my stomach hurts, and everything else but I really thank you from deep down I honestly thought I was the only one out there that this was happening too... So now that I know my kids are not the only kids in the world that have selective hearing or possibly need hearing aids I feel alot better Thank you so much...

Amber Miller said...

How about the kids sleeping with dad and me sleeping on the couch! I'm 8 months pregnant and for some reason the couch is a million :) times more comfortable than our bed. The kids used to sleep with us all the time and then it dwindled down to only on nights when I was gone when they went to bed doing a newspaper route - once I started sleeping on the couch they worked they way back to every night! Now we just have to figure out what the situation will be when baby arrives! We only have a queen-size bed so we're definitely not all 5 sleeping together!

Anonymous said...

Lady you make me smile. Kuddos on the million thing, your like famous. Feel like I know you and your crazy 6 pack. I love reading what you have to say. Please don't take this the wrong way, but you make me feel better about my own stay-at-home mommy days. NOBODY is perfect!! Thanks for keeping up with all the writing!

isabel in virginia

Shelly Story said...

I am one of your one million hits...I read your blog every time it updates.

You TOTALLY validate me and my life...I too have 6 kids (except all of mine are still under 10), my husband is never home as he works 2 full-time careers, I too have changed over 24,000 diapers and have spent over 8 years pregnant or breasfeeding or both, and just yesterday I found a rotten, dried-up apple core on the toy shelf.

I am just glad to know that we are all in this together! Thanks for your diligence to this blog.

Anonymous said...

haha. i read your ebay story about the pokemon cards. i got it in an e-mail and being the second oldest of six kids, let me tell ya, thats exactly what its like when we go shopping! tee-hee. Well you sound like such a cute lady! loved your story!

Brooke said...

Congrats on the 1 millions today!

houseofdanes said...

One Million.... bet you wish it was dollars instead of hits :) Great job....
hey I can roll with you... one million is the amount of pounds of doggy doo i clean up after three great danes each year.... one million minutes is the amount of time i have to rub my husbands, head, legs, feet, back.. while I get one millions seconds worth :)
you make me laugh.. keep up the great work dawn
tami

All moments remembered said...

Congrats to all those hits!!! You are one hit on woman!! :)

To Jackson, I am so sorry about Bahama!! I bet he is now with all the other cool hermit crabs. I send you tons of hugs. I would tell your mom she needs to SING at the ceremony for Bahama!! I had my mom sing at all my hamsters funerals!!!

I wrote a funny BOOF (Passing gas) story on my blog last night. It is called Lessons from Granpa. Its a good one and something I will keep in my back pocket to use if there is ever a need.

Rest in peace little crab!!

Hugs,
Stacey

Deidre said...

1 Million calories... i can't swallow that! I don't think you can assimilate so much, but hey, this is America! You never know what we can consume.

1 Million laughs is a lot to give out.. .. what if you had to give us all a candy bar for halloween... what would you serve us?

Shannon said...

Don't you just love Phil Joel's hair in this video? Did you know he used to be a hairdresser? I bet he does his wife's hair. And yes, he does have a wife. Millions of dollars is what you can hope for from your book!

Charmingdesigns said...

Lovin your blog!! makes me feel like my life is calm! Laurie

Kila said...

I just love that last photo. Awwww....

Hermit crabs didn't last long here, either, and we followed all the instructions!

maxchs said...

Differentiation huh? lolz..there could be one millions of answer or infinity...

Anonymous said...

1,000,000 times I thank my creator my son bought the story about his hermit crab 'getting loose' while I was 'visiting the shores of the Hudson River and him running off to find his family.

1,000,000 more laughs and insights from reading your blog is all I ask.

1,000,000 dollars is way less than I hope you make on your book deal.

1,000,000 more laughter being heard around the world because you have taken the time to share your life with us.

A million thank-yous Ms. Dawn.

Korkie

Liene said...

I can so relate on 2 of your 1 million comments. First one being 1 million times my son has said he's been bored. And the second, one million is the number of times I've told my son to settle down in the last hour. Not sure if your little boy is the same age as mine but I'm ready for Kindergarten. He's almost 4 and driving me crazy with the Terrible 3's!

Thevan said...

i read about u on a local newspaper...and i'd have to say,,impressive..lol.. a mill hits in a mth..awesomme

tt.

Bob Devlin said...

One million!! And here I was getting excited about reaching 2,000.

Sorry for your son's sadness. I hope he's doing better.

Anonymous said...

Hi Dawn, First Congrats on the Million hits! I have been a hitter for a month now. I wanted to ask a question. My son has a friend who is 10 years old. When he spends the night he brings a pull up with him because he pee's at night. Well lately He won't bring one with and makes a huge mess. I guess his mom says he don't need them anymore. I don't know how to talk with his mom or her son for that matter. I feel sad for him. Should I buy some for our house? Also my girlfriends son had his tonsils and adnoids removed and that stopped his night wetting. I would like to tell his mom about that too. Just wondering what you and your readers think. Kristine in Michiagn

stephanie said...

Hey math IS fun! And I'm Not being sarcastic, I really do like it!!!

Kristi Sauer said...

Thats AMAZING!!! Did people originally find you because of the EBay listing and then the word spread about how funny you are?! Congrats!

Anonymous said...

OH, I wish your kids also had blogs...and liked to write in 'em. I'm sure their perspectives would be somewhat insightful and probably just as funny.

Now, I understand you probably don't want to have another child but keeping one in the bed as a reminder for what could happen isn't necessarily the best form of birth control...
My kiddos are sleep ninjas. I'm too afraid to sleep in the same bed with them; it's hard to explain away all those black eyes and bruised arms! ;)

Stephanie said...

Yea for co-sleeping!!!!

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