Happy Mother's Day (And Other Disasters)

I hope all the moms and mom-like people out there had a nice Mother's Day! I sure did! The kids planned the morning secretly and I honestly had no clue what they were up to. I went to church with Brooklyn, Lexington, and Jackson while the other three stayed home. Savannah had slipped Jackson some money before I left for church so Jackson could buy me a corsage. (My church always sells these for Mother's Day.)

He gave it to me and said, "I know you don't really like flowers, but here." Yes, yes, I admit that I don't really like flowers. It's not that I dislike them. I'm just not big on them. I'd rather that people not spend money on something that's going to die in a few days. And if you give me a plant, I'll just end up killing it within a month. Really. I kill air plants. They just need air! I kill them. Yeah.

But, even though I'm not overly fond of flowers, I love, love, LOVE the thought behind them and that's what counts. So I pinned on my corsage and wore it proudly.

When I got home, I walked in the door to see the table set with a pink tablecloth. Clay had set the table while Savannah made French toast, cheesy eggs, and crescent rolls. How sweet are they? Austin slept the whole time. Five out of six isn't bad, right?

We had breakfast and then I told the kids that for Mother's Day, I wanted them to cooperate and let me take some pictures of them. I loaded up the kids and drove them out to a little wooded area a few towns over where I snapped some pictures.

They were awesome and let me take over 200 photos! Yeah, I know; it's a sickness.

We ended the evening with grilled chicken I sort of, a little bit, burned and a Dairy Queen run to make up for the sort of, little bit, burned chicken and peppers. I went to sleep with a smile on my face because I'm so blessed to be called "Mom" by six awesome kids.

But alas, payback was just around the corner.

Today, Clayton and Brooklyn, my partners in crime mischief, made up for being so good yesterday. While I was talking on the phone and sifting through paperwork in my room, they were making themselves a snack.

"Mom, can Brooklyn and me have a waffle?"

"Sure. Do you need help?" Stupid question. Stupid. Yes, of course, they need help! You always go help them in the kitchen. Always. Those two are not to be trusted around any kind of small appliances. Or utensils. Or food. Or condiments. Or toiletries. Okay, basically, you just can't trust them and you are stupid if you choose to ignore that fact.

I was stupid.

I heard the water running full-blast in the kitchen sink.

"Turn off the water, guys! Hey! Clayton and Brooklyn! Turn off the water if you're done with it! Hello?! TURN IT OFF!"

I walked out to the kitchen to see the water running into the sink. No kids were in sight. I started heading in the direction of the giggles only to stop dead in my tracks.

Yeah, that's a waffle covered in half a pound of sugar. It's also a full cup of some nutritional supplement I've had in the fridge for years. I bought it to give Jackson some extra calories back when he was on medication that curbed his appetite big time. He thought it tasted like sewer water and so it sat in the fridge. Until today.


Not quite sure what prompted them to pour soapy water on the plate o' sugar.

I was too angry at this point, to take pictures of the floor. And besides, I could hear the bathtub faucet turn on, so I slammed down my camera and took off for the bathroom. Four kitchen towels were dripping wet in the bathroom sink. A pile of discarded clothes was on the floor. The two hooligans were climbing into the tub. I remained calm and collected as always as I gently asked, "WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU TWO DOING?!!! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?! DID YOU REALLY THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO DUMP HALF A POUND OF POWDERED SUGAR ON THE TABLE AND FLOOR? WHAT'S WITH THE KITCHEN SINK OVERFLOWING? WHY THE WET TOWELS IN HERE? WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?????"

To which, I received my standard answer. "I dunno."

Deep breaths, Dawn, deep breaths. I threw my hands up and ran back to my computer where I pulled up these pictures from yesterday.

Clearly, this is why God makes little kids so darn cute. So we don't kill them.

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