Countdown to BlogHer!

I leave for San Francisco for the BlogHer conference Thursday morning so technically, I should be in "freak-out" mode. I'm not there yet. I'm starting to get stuff done though. I got my hair done today. She covered the gray highlighted it. Whenever I get my hair dyed highlighted, my scalp itches like mad. Does this happen to anyone else? I look like I have serious dandruff issues as I claw my poor head like crazy for hours after getting my hair colored. Still, bloody scratches down my skull are better than gray unhighlighted hair.

I also got it cut. Until last summer, I've always had long hair as an adult. I think the reason I've kept my hair long is because I was traumatized as a kid. I spent my youth looking like a boy. Seriously, I have pictures of myself looking like this.

I don't know why, but my mom always insisted I have my hair cut short. Darn that Dorothy Hamill and her stupid haircut!

So I got brave and cut it short last summer. Well it was short for me anyway. Today I asked my hairdresser, who also happens to be a really good friend of mine, if she'd cut the back of my hair really short, but keep the front long.
My friend, Gin, said, "I cut it like that last month."
"No, I want it even shorter in back. I want to be able to kinda fluff it up in back if I want."
"You want it like John and Kate plus 8?"
"I have no clue what her hair looks like," I said. Then I pointed to a picture of a supermodel in her hair magazine and told her, "Make me look like that."
She looked at me like I was stupid and said something along the lines of, "Are you serious?! Her hair is MUCH shorter than yours. I can cut it short like that, but it won't be long in front then."
"I don't want you to touch the front. Just make the back short," I insisted.
"So basically you want 2 different haircuts?" she asked.
"Is there something wrong with that?"
At this point, she shook her head and told me she'd cut it the way I wanted, but I had to promise to tell everyone that I'd cut it myself.

Actually, she didn't cut the back as short as I wanted it so it ended up looking fine.

What we women go through to look prettiful. Like waxing. What sicko ever decided that smearing hot wax on sensitive body parts then ripping it off, was a good idea? Who proclaimed that smooth was good and Brillo pad hairy was bad?

And pedicures. I do love me a good pedicure, but I can't afford them very often and who has the time to just sit there and do nothing but relax? So, I got a PedEgg. Have you guys seen these? My kids told me I needed one after they saw a commercial for it on tv. So what - my heels have skin thicker than an elephant's. Does that really mean I need one? I got this PedEgg thing back when Mimi, Michelle and I saw Oprah. I've been using it since and I've got to say that I love this thing! You rub it on your heels and then open it up and dump out the contents of your dead heel skin which looks curiously like grated Parmesan cheese. Mmmm.

And I haven't started packing yet because I have no idea what to wear. Men don't do this. They pack whatever they find on the floor that passes the sniff test. Done. Why do we women agonize over what we'll wear? I think if I bring a steamer trunk, I can pack my entire closet. That way, I can try on 12 things every day that I'm in California and I won't have to decide what to pack.

Tomorrow I go to the dentist to get 2 teeth fixed. You know, because I'm old and thanks to 6 pregnancies, my teeth are falling out of my head. Pretty soon I'm going to look like I'm from Peoria. (Kidding. JUST KIDDING!) Because I just made fun of Peoria, my cheeks are going to swell up after my appointment and I'll look like a Puffer Fish at the BlogHer conference.

Sooo, who's going to BlogHer?