Thursday, July 29, 2010

Ignorant People Ruin it for the Whole Class

Some of you may have noticed that I changed my comment settings. You have to be a registered user to leave a comment on my blog now. I'm sorry to all of you nice anonymous commenters. There were a few bad seeds that had to go and ruin it for the whole class. As always, anonymous commenters who don't want to sign up for an account, can leave me emails HERE. And for those of you who just can't seem to keep your nastiness to yourself, you can leave me hate mail HERE.

I received a comment telling me that I was selfish for divorcing Joe, and that I should've thought of my kids. Really? REALLY? Are there are actually people out there who think I'd get divorced and have to go it alone unless there was a darn good reason? It was because of my kids that I stayed in a sick marriage, despite being miserable, for more years than I can count. But some things happened last year that made me realize that staying with him was no longer best "for the kids" and if I stayed, I'd be doing more harm than good to them.


My entire marriage has been a huge string of lies. One after another. I'm not writing about the stuff he's done and continues to do. Believe me, there's a huge part of me that would love to spill everything so you guys could see just what I'm dealing with. But again, my kids may read this some day and they don't need to read the negative stuff about their dad. But it pisses me off to no end, when some ignorant stranger who doesn't even have the guts to leave their name and email address presumes to tell me what I'm doing wrong. You have no idea! Just because I've chosen not to write about all the crap here, do not assume that I just didn't care and didn't try or work at my marriage.

I've spent way too many years feeling like I wasn't good enough. I'm not going to let a bunch of strangers continue to let me feel that way. I take care of six kids on my own. I stay up until 3:00 almost every night so I can get everything done. I make mistakes. I screw up. But I keep going. Day after day, I get up and do it all over again. I don't have help. Their dad hasn't even seen them since Christmas eve. And despite that, I enjoy it! I love my kids! I love the chaos and craziness! I wouldn't trade it for the world! I'm teaching them that they need to respect others and demand respect in return. And I will not let anyone make me feel like I'm less than worthy anymore.

Oh yeah, and I don't need to hear any more comments about me and Victor. He's my friend. He's a good guy. We talk every day. We have a lot in common. It's nice having someone to talk to. It's nice having a genuine smile on my face. It's nice to feel good about myself. I may have been married, but I have been alone for more years than I can count. And only time will tell whether something more ever comes of it or not, but I don't need unsolicited advice from people who can only see the negative in any situation.


Okay. I'm so sorry that all my regular, wonderful readers had to read that garbage. It's because of you guys that I continue to blog and share the fun stories. And speaking of fun stories. Here's an oldie but a goodie. Enjoy!

I Resign

August 7, 2007

Dear husband,

The purpose of this resignation letter is to inform you that I will be leaving my position with your family effective August 8. I will be relocating to the Bahamas in the near future. As much as I would love to stay on as your chief laundress, cook, nurse, nanny, teacher, chauffeur, household manager, accountant, waitress, and maid, I simply do not get paid enough to put up with your children's deeds. Today, for example, Clay launched his dinner plate across the room like some medieval catapult because his "meatball was touching his spaghetti". I don't know what I was thinking when I spooned a meatball onto the same plate as his spaghetti!

Your sons also held a battle in the family room using pillows as their weapons of choice. When battling the forces of evil with pillows, I suppose one must take the high ground which would explain why they were jumping around on the couch while wildly flinging the pillows at each other. In doing so, the wooden frame of the couch snapped and burst through the fabric.One of your children managed to lock everyone out of the bathroom. Well, I assume it was one of your children, however they unanimously agree that Notme was the guilty party. According to your children, Notme has been responsible for laying wet towels on the floor, spilling juice on the carpet, eating an entire pack of gum from my purse, dumping out buckets of toys, and flushing Barbie dolls down the toilet. I, however, have yet to catch Notme in the act.

When Savannah asked me if she could get a screwdriver to take the doorknob off the door, I told her that I didn't want her to touch the door until I tried to unlock it. I can certainly see how she understood that to mean 'go outside, get Daddy's ladder, climb up into the bathroom through the window and then take the screwdriver to remove the doorknob from the inside of the bathroom.'

I have appreciated both being part of your family and the opportunities that have been provided to me during the last several years. Had I not held this position, I would never have learned that staples pass harmlessly through a one year old's digestive system, that nail polish sticks to the inside of a toilet bowl, or that blue popsicles will turn a toddler's poop neon green. Clearly the past thirteen years on this job have given me invaluable information and skills that will help me acquire a new position in the real world.

Please do not let me know if I can be of assistance during the transition.

Please do not try to reach me at the above address if you have any questions or need any further information. I have turned off my phone and am now enjoying doing nothing but reading non-Dr. Seuss books, eating food other than mac-n-cheese and chicken nuggets, wearing clothes without spit up stains or dirty hand prints, and consuming large quantities of tropical rum drinks with little paper umbrellas.

Sincerely,

~Dawn

P.S. I finally found the source of the oddly colored liquid that spilled all over the inside of the refrigerator. It leaked from a jar of pickles into which Austin, doing some sort of experiment known only to him, had poured a packet of KoolAid and sugar.

113 comments:

Sandy in Illinois said...

Hugs. Missed you at VBS this week.

kntsmom said...

Dawn,

You go girl, there are many of us out here who love to read your blog and we understand that you are who your are and I give you a lot of credit for what you do. Congratulations on finally being free!!!

missamandadear said...

ROCK ON DAWN! :)

Dar said...

GOOD FOR YOU DAWN!!!
So Glad you stood your ground!

asthefarmturns said...

As a child of divorce, I can honestly say that the best thing my mother ever did was divorce her horrible, abusive husband. We aren't inside your house. We don't know everything that is going on. But I believe that you are doing the best for your kids. They will be okay... even if they had divorced parents.

Your a strong lady. :)

Marla @ www.asthefarmturns.wordpress.com

Jen said...

Hi Dawn. I haven't left a comment here since your first days of blogging, just after thd Ebay auction but oh boy have I continued to read your blog. You are wonderful and are doing a wonderful job of living your life your way and bringing up such well rounded and well loved children. I think many people believe that thrif life will be enriched by putting down others, I think that's so incredibly sad and delusional and unfortunately occasionally they throw that negativity onto lovely people like yourself. Don't let them stop you Dawn, I couldn't imagine the blogosphere without you in it xo

Christina said...

What I missed that? Oh wait I can't keep up with the comments! I blame all the kids, but if the need does arise I do have a toy vodoo doll that I willingy let the twins reek havoc on if need be!

And the old post solved my major problem of the week with 3 year old! Blue popsicles never thought it would be those!

People ask me how I do it all the time, I always say because I love it.

And at the end of every long tiring day I can always get a good laugh from you!

Now I am off to fold Mount-Kill-A-Mom-Laundry.

Six-Pack Momma said...

As a mom of six, myself, I can't imagine going it alone. But I can only imagine that it is almost easier now that you have made your decision. Best of luck Dawn, you are an amazing woman and mom.

And thanks for the repost. It's one of my favorites- one that hooked me in the beginning.

pbo said...

Dawn,
I feel like apologizing (instead of screaming at them) for all of the "special" people out there that seem to know your life better than you do. I don't know everything you have been through but it really is none of my business even if you are a "public" figure.

It sounds like the comments are along the lines comments to Vanna White after she had her last child and people ragged her about being fat an needing to lose weight.

Just keep up the good work, after all it is your life and you know what is best for you and your children.

V1nce said...

Geez Loise I so dislike those few rotten apples that spoil it for everyone. Good for you, Dawn - lock and load!

I've been reading your blog since the Pokemon cards incident and very rarely commented. Loved the parts you shared with us, your humor your good sense of buying half-gallon great ice-cream from Aldis (I think it was Aldis) and the hilarious hijinks of you children.

Thank you. I appreciate it and I appreciate all that you've chosen to share with us.

Without judging. Promise.

Although I do keep score... Dawn 2,317 Stupid People: Zip Zero Nada.

Again thanks. And boo judgemental people. Boo I say. BOOO!

Now if you'll excuse me I have to go do the Kool-Aid thing to my brother's shower :-)

Dezimber said...

Hugs!!! Too bad there are people out there that don't know when to keep quite. Only you know what is best for you and your children. Stay strong! I check your Blog daily and look forward to reading each entry. Some of us love you no matter what! As for Vincent it is great that you have a good friend that knows exactly what you are going through so you can support each other as friends. The hopeless romantics would love if the friendship grew into something more but didn't Hollywood already do that story?

Jen said...

:D You go, girl! (hugs) You are doing just fine and being you. THAT'S what matters. You take care of and LOVE your kiddos. THAT'S what matters. So, as far as I'm concerned, you totally absolutely, ROCK in my book. :) (hugs)

Laura ~Peach~ said...

so sorry that you are still getting stupid comments hate mail and other useless junk... you are a good mom and what has happened inthe past with your husband is NOT OUR BUSINESS... I am glad you choose to address the mess and set people straight ... hang in there you have my silent support :)
Hugs Laura

Cheryl said...

Dawn you rock! I love your blog and your humor. You are a woman of great strength and you, and ONLY you, gets to decide what is best for your family. Sounds to me like you made the right choice and your children are on their way to being wonderful adults. Take care and stand up proud!!

Raevyn said...

Anonymous commenters are nothing more than pathetic twerps with no real life of their own, so they think they know all about yours based on the pieces you share here. They are not worth your energy!

Speaking as a child of divorce (I was almost 13 when they separated, and by the time it was final, had turned 13). I knew LONG before Mom told us what was going to happen that our house was a stress-filled, negative place. Despite the stress of the divorce, we had a much calmer, happier life without the sperm donor present on a daily basis. Initially he made a few attempts to gain favor with us and the judge, claiming to want custody, but by the time the divorce was finalized (and here in TX it took from mid-August until the end of December) he had moved to Ohio. From that point on, until I turned 18, we saw him 4 times. HE made that choice, not us, and not Mom. We knew it, as I'm sure at least Austin & Savannah can see for themselves. The younger ones will either figure it out eventually on their own, or the older ones will make sure they know.
Better for them to be in a single parent home where they know they are loved and wanted, than a two parent home filled with anger, resentment, and whatever else ya'll were dealing with before the separation/divorce.

Shannon said...

There will always be those who will try to tell you how to wear your shoes, without ever knowing what kind of shoes they are. The only thing you can do is blink at them, smile at them, turn around and walk away. They simply aren't worth the increased blood pressure or the time it takes to tell them off.

Michelle Faith said...

No Hate mail here only comment love.

silverwaters said...

Thanks, Dawn for sharing your life with us. I've been following since a few years now, and you seldom fail to bring a smile, even if it's just because I can relate in some way and no longer feel like I must be the only mother in the world who has to deal with toilet issues, over-ambitious boys, being constantly tired, feeling overwhelmed at times, etc. (and I only have 3! I so admire you!)
Good for you for the decisions you make, they're yours alone to make and those who want to judge should take a look at the three fingers pointing back at them :)
Just the fact that you pulled off that huge trip to the beach with your kids on your own shows amazing strength on your part. From what you show us, it looks as if your kids are amazing! They are the proof that you're doing the right thing for them. Never listen to the nay-sayers. All the best!
ps. do you really get emails on the hate-mail box?

Celestial said...

Awww people are just stupid sometimes and have issues in their own lives and want to take it out on others. Jealousy is a hard thing to hold back! You are awesome and not everyone can deal with that

Shellie said...

It's really too bad there's no automatic "idiot" filter for your emails! I, for one, am glad that you've found a friend who can TRULY relate to what you're going through. Thank you for continuing to make us laugh, even through the rough times.

Jennifer said...

As a single mom of one 4 yo boy, I can guarantee a mother of six doesn't go into single parenthood without a LOT of consideration! It's not like you're Kate Gosselin with nannies for goodness sakes! Plus, divorce is so personal to anyone who goes through it that no one should ever comment on someone's experience. No one knows what really goes on in someone else's marriage in real life, Let alone if you only read a blog about the person! Trolls are such a pain in the butt.

MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Good for you Dawn! Love you and your spirit, and forget about any idiots who have nothing else going on in their lives but to try and hurt you.

By the way, who the heck's Victor? I thought you were into some guy named Idaho.

Oh wait!! There's a place called Victor, Idaho -- is that why he calls himself SPUDS???

Love ya!

Anita M H said...

This has happened to a few of my friends as well, and it always makes me sad when people who don't know a situation at all think they have the right to pass judgement.

I am so glad that you have found a friend who can give you support and companionship. It's a wonderful thing.

Anita M H said...

This has happened to a few of my friends as well, and it always makes me sad when people who don't know a situation at all think they have the right to pass judgement.

I am so glad that you have found a friend who can give you support and companionship. It's a wonderful thing.

DarcsFalcon said...

You go girl! I love this! And not just because I've gone though the exact same thing during my divorce. It seemed like everyone thought they knew better than me what was best for my life.

Good for you for putting the reminder out there that we only know what's best for our own lives, and NOT someone else's.

And honestly, we women really ought to do a better job of sticking together and supporting one another.

Don't know you in person, but think of you as a friend. *hugs* You're doing just fine, hon. :)
Vanessa

Spuds said...

I've never in my life met a stronger, more beautiful woman than you. I'm glad to have you to talk to, too! You keep me sane... saner!

jj said...

GOOD for you!! Let the haters hate on... elsewhere!

I read your blog from sunny...england. And I really enjoy reading about your adventures, mishaps and all that you and the kids get up to.

Life's not easy, "stuff" happens, and I think you're doing a fantastic job through it all!

I'm young. I've not been married. But I've experienced my parents divorcing, for reasons that no one ever would have guessed or can even now comprehend. And my Mum got a lot of crap from people for leaving my old man... and they didn't even have a sodding clue.

No one has a clue!

They never have, they never will.

Thanks for posting all that you do. It certainly puts a smile on my face!

x

Mum-me said...

Good on you for changing the settings. People who want to write nasty or judgmental comments should have the courage to leave their name. I agree with 'anonymous' that it's not fair on the kids, but that's his fault not yours. Can't believe he hasn't seen his own children since Christmas Eve? How can a dad do that to his own children - or himself? I do feel sorry for them, but it's himself he is hurting most of all.

Julia med Sanna said...

Oh Dawn, I can't believe that people say and write things like that to you!
I always say that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all.
I think you are so strong and such an inspiration. You go Dawn!!!

Ps. Need any more chocolate?

belindasbaubles said...

Babe you make me laugh to the point of chest pains. You bring sunshine into my cloudy days and at least when I know I'm having a bad one, I can be grateful I don't let my daughter read Spud's blog *giggle* or that cool aid is not sold in Australia.

Let the dumb a** ones choke on their own envy.
They just don't rock as hard as you do. Colour them Green.
Dawn is woman hear her roar!
Belinda in Brisbane Australia

Diana said...

Hi Dawn,
I've been reading your blog since the Pokemon cards...Too bad for the internet trolls who leave an opinion on that which they no nothing about. No one knows what you are going through, and each divorce is is an intensely personal experience. For someone to express an opinion, based on the VERY few times you have opened that personal door just a crack, on your blog is just wrong. I hope you delete the hate mail you get. They are not worth your time reading them. You are a very brave person to make an extremely difficult decision in your personal life. The trolls need to get a life.

You go girl...

Diana

Kollel said...

I'll admit that I used to wonder if your divorce was somehow related to the fact that you became semi-famous and that that took up a lot of your time that would have otherwise been available for your family. Now that I "know" you better, I realize that your marital problems have been going on way, way, way longer than that and that Joe has been treating you like **** for longer than most of us can ever guess. I bet he had an affair last year or some such wonderful thing as that. So to all those know-it-alls who call you selfish or whatever else they might call you, I think we should all stop jumping to conclusions and give Dawn the respect she deserves.

Sarah said...

So very sorry you have ugly people picking on you. I just don't get people that do that to all the nice people's blogs (like yours) that I read. No one is forcing them to read, so if they don't like something you say or do, I would suggest they just DON'T READ IT! Geesh.

You are dealing with more than enough right now without having to put up with all that stuff from mean people. Very sorry. :(

You are doing a GREAT job as a Mom and as a newly single mom. I applaud your commitment not to trashing Joe on your blog. Good for you. That can't be easy.

You keep on keeping on, girl, and hold your head up high. You are strong and smart and beautiful and funny and being all your can be for your kids. The world needs more mothers/people like you!

Have a great weekend! :)

Kari in CO said...

I have been reading your blog since your listing on Ebay became such a big hit. It never ceases to amaze me how rude some people can be. Why do they have to be so negative and hateful? Probably because they are miserable in their own lives.

Thank you for continuing to share a little piece of your life with us. I love readying your blogs!

Gail said...

Up until a few minutes ago I was one of your Anonymous Commentors (is that a word?? never mind ..), but I only ever commented twice, and I was nice both times .. I swear!
Girl - you are GREAT - don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I've been following from over here in Bonnie Scotland since the days of EBay and Pokemon, and all I can say about the "people" (loose expression!) who diss what you are doing is don't let those "barstewards" grind you down .. insert appropriate word in quotation marks :)
It's wonderful that you've found someone to talk to, laugh with, moan at sometimes maybe - the twerps are just jealous! Course you realise this means I now follow Spuds blog too .. hehehe
You keep doing just what you are doing Dawn, you are one awesome lady!!
Take Care
Gail xx

Diane said...

Big hugs to you Dawn! I'm a mom of four all under the age of 7 and a military wife. I know how hard it is to be the single mom and the last thing you need is snotty people making rude comments. They can all stuff it! As for Spuds, I think it's fantastic that you both have found a great friendship in each other and I wish you both the best :)

Brooke said...

Love ya Dawn! I had to comment because of the PS about Austin and the Koolaid/pickles. On an Alton Brown show where he traveled through the South he showed some giant jars of pickles mixed with red Koolaid. I wonder if Austin saw that and tried it... or if he's just a food genius :)

Jennifer said...

I LOVE YOU DAWN!! I Love your blog, I love your sense of humor. I love that you tell the truth and dont sugar coat stuff, and I love that you feel open enough to talk about Victor. Us long time readers are on your side and have complete faith in what you do!
I just wish I could meet you and your kids one day to see what I have been reding all these years!
Jennifer

Krys72599 said...

Are you effin' kidding me? Who thinks they have the right to butt into your private life and judge you? This is a small slice of your life and as you mentioned, there are things that have no business being out here for all to see, and the inner troubles of your marriage is one example.
I admire you, Dawn, for being a hands-on, fully involved, loving, funny, smart mother of six.
I was floored; I was a reader for a while but I didn't see your divorce coming 'cause you deliberately didn't post all the bad things.
But we're not your marriage counselor - this is a blog written by a mom, about her kids and her family.
Where do all these judgmental creeps get their inflated sense of self-importance from???
Know that we're LOVING your blog, loving you and Victor, loving your kids - have a good life!

Knitty said...

Must be easy for some to hide behind "anonymous" while they spew things they wouldn't have the balls to say to someone's face.

While I do wish that there was a common denominator of decency (honesty, respect for others, old fashioned crazy ideas like that), I don't get why people think everyone else should live exactly as they live. I suspect some of the anons have an ugly life or their own dirty little secrets and bashing someone makes them feel superior for 20 or 30 seconds.

I can't imagine your life right now, but heck, I couldn't imagine it when I began reading here. ;-) If I only wanted to read about 57 year old mothers of two, grandmothers of one who are still sexy babes (a.k.a. delusional) I'd spend my day reading only my own blog.

Illegitimis nil carborundum! (Don't let the bastards grind you down)

Jen@Scrapingirl said...

Sorry you have to deal with crabby people. I am amazed how some people feel it is their duty to tell you what you're doing wrong, even if you're not. If you don't agree with what you're reading, click that little red X in the upper right corner. Gimme a break!! I love ya, and will always support you, even though I've never met ya. :) Have a great day!!

Carrie M. said...

Dawn, I'm so sorry for all you've been through. As a mother of 4 who's gone through a divorce myself, I completely understand what you're going through. People have no clue unless they've been there. In fact, my "best friends" even left dropped me. I lost everything in my divorce. Its not easy. But I met my current husband soon after. I with you all the happiness in the world. You and Spuds seem so perfect for each other. Just be HAPPY! You are a fantastic mother. You're kids are very lucky to have you!

kirine said...

Dawn,

First off, HUGE hugs. First and foremeost, no good parent ever goes into a divorce lightly. There's just entirely too much to take into consideration. AND IMHO, I would show the kids the blog one day. Let them see that you took the high road. That way, should they ever find themselves in that particular situation, they too, can take the high road and manage to keep their dignity and self esteem intact.

The Mommy said...

Great. Now I have to be all nice and stuff! Just kidding!

I think it's probably a contradiction to tell someone who has a public blog that their private life is their own, but it's true. You share what and how much you want. That's the POINT. There is such a thing as too much information.

Clearly, you're doing the best you can. It never ceases to amaze me how many people take the time and effort to comment (anonymously, even!) and leave negative remarks. I still abide by the rule: If you don't like it, don't READ it! (This was my feeling regarding Kate Gosselin. I happen to like her but there were ENTIRE SITES dedicated to hating on her. Talk about needing a life!)

I'm glad you're standing up for yourself. Sometimes a life-changing event makes us wake up and realize we deserve so much more (in the way of respect, especially) than we were getting. You're doing right by your kids. Obviously. Duh.

Life is Like a Box of Chocolates said...

There will always be people who seem to have nothing better to do than to break other people down to their size.

Good for you for not letting that hold you back.

I've changed my settings to "Moderate" all comments because viagra ads were sneakily attached to old posts on my blog.

Lorene said...

Dawn--

Thanks for sharing your life with us. Life is never easy and with kids it doesn't get any easier. You are an amazing mom who does a great job of keeping life well rounded. Keep up the good work and know that your "fans" adore you.

tatterdemalion said...

Dear Dawn;

On your behalf because you are much too nice a lady, I respectfully tell those people to "mind their OWN damn business".

As a child of parents who fought all the time, in a house in which there was violence and alcohol abuse, I wish with ALL my heart that my Mum had been able to leave my father, because it was far more damaging hearing all the fights and violence, than ANY divorce could have been.

You did what was right for you and the kids, remember that and be strong.

Erin T. said...

Keep your head up, Dawn. No one but you knows what's best for your family, and no one has the right to tell you that you're wrong for doing the best you can.

You're doing a damn good job of raising your kids - it's evident from your photos and from your stories.

The Morgan Family said...

I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself and proud of you for NOT trying to defend your actions by dragging out the dirty laundry.

As for the kool aid/sugar/pickle - Alton Brown did a Feasting on Asphalt show where he went somewhere in the south - Mississippi or something?- and it is called a koolickle. They take the big gallons of dill pickles and flavor them with cherry kool aid and sugar.

Megryansmom said...

Good for you Dawn! I wish I had your spunk back when I was going through that mess. Mwhaaaa

SandyAnnDee said...

I love your blog and just can't understand where the hate is coming from. :( I guess some people are so miserable with their own lives that they have to harp to others to make themselves feel better?

Donna in PA :) said...

Dawn,

What a shame you have to waste a post just to shut ignorant people up. But, GOOD FOR YOU!!

Always remember: Insecurity and jealousy breed meanness. We have the world's WORST neighbors over here and that's what we tell ourselves when they get out of hand. When people are insecure with themselves/their situations/their own marriages, etc., they take it out on the people they are jealous of. You just happen to be directly in the line of fire. Let it roll off your back and just enjoy all of us happy people that love you!!

Keep doing what you're doing because it's obviously working. And remember, "Smile, God loves you!"

(((HUGS)))
Donna in PA :)

Kris said...

Good for you! (((((Dawn)))))

Kari said...

Dawn,
I read your blog daily, and I have beeni n your shoes ( okay I have 2 kids..not six) but otherwise..I KNOW the crap you have to deal with. You provide many smiles and are one of many who have to go through divorce. You are also "right on" when divorce is , at times, exactly what the children need. You are also "right on" when you don't write about what is "really" going on...I took that road as well and my relationship with my children has never been better.

petunia6348 said...

Oh, Dawn! I just can't believe how many stupid people there are in this world. Having been through a very bad divorce with my daughter who is almost your age, I totally understand that you don't make this kind of decision without weighing all the options. You did what you determined was the VERY BEST for your kids. Staying in an abusive relationship is NOT healthy for any of you. He doesn't have to lay a hand on you to be abusive, by the way. Just continually making you feel unworthy is a form of abuse. My daughter said it was like a string of Christmas lights coming on one at a time when she finally realized that the relationship was going nowhere. I am sure she would have been dead by now, or in jail for homicide. She finally found her selfworth and it led her to the man of her dreams who makes her laugh every day! If you have found that person in Spuds, who am I to criticize??? You are doing what you think is best for all of you and sharing the best parts of it with all of us. You are very wise not to post all of the bad stuff because it will come back to haunt you. When you close the book on this chapter, and move on you won't have any regrets. I do hope you are writing stuff down and tearing up the paper or at least talking to some neutral person. You do need to vent or you will explode! Last, but not least, I want to thank you for making me laugh everyday and also for the moments that make me very grateful for being alive. ♥♥♥ You!

Robin said...

YOU ROCK!! Feel free to vent away my friend. This IS your blog. But just for fun we should all be allowed to read the hate mail so we can form a search party for these people and ...well, I'm not sure what suitable punishment should be but we can think of something.
We've never met in person but I so love reading about your family - the good times and the bad. I look forward to "watching" your children grow up to be amazing individuals and I'm waiting anxiously to see just where this friendship with Spuds is going. As I've said before, it may never be anything more than a friendship but that's ok. If he puts a smile on your face he's a good friend to have.
Love ya~
Robin

Stacey said...

I've never commented before but I think you are doing an awesome job! Raising 6 kids on your own, amazing. Also I think it's great that you have found Spuds to talk to. Everyone needs a ear/shoulder. You have to have so much in common, it makes sense for you to have a connection. So try your best to forget those negative people. Unhappy people always try to bring others down. There are plenty of us that think you're doing an outstanding job.

Rebecca Saunders said...

Dawn,
I've been following you since the pokemon cards too- and I just have to say: Do what makes you happy, screw everyone else. :-) (Sorry, a little blunt) But honestly honey, I haven't seen you stand up for yourself like this before and it's refreshing as all get out.
You are an amazing mom and don't you date let anyone else tell you differently. :-D

amybf19 said...

Good for you Dawn standing up for yourself! I, as a long time reader, sometime poster, I appreciate your open and honest blog posts. I admire you for dealing well with things under pressure and under a microscope, so to speak. I enjoy reading your blog and thank you for sharing a part of your life with us.
Hugs!

Angie said...

Don't let the meanies get you down. You made the right choice for yourself and your kids. Research shows that children with divorced parents do better than kids raised in dysfunctional homes. Especially if those parents keep the relationship amiable (at least in front of the kids). So not bad-mouthing their Dad is one of the best gifts you can give your kids.

tommygirl said...

Dawn, I don't comment often, but I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your blog. <3 You are an amazing woman and you deserve the best in life. Your children have been abandoned by their father and you are doing the best you can with what you have got. I hope now and for many years to come your children will appreciate all you have done for them.

jennyandcompany said...

I think you are doing awesome. I especially appreciate you sharing some of the issues you went through b/c it helped me see that we were headed down a similar path and to get help to stop it asap. (al-anon is a life-saver).

I love how you have found this amazing talent that helps you provide for your children without having to work full-time outside of the home. I couldn't imagine how difficult that would be along with caring for 6 children alone. God has really given you what you need to survive.

Thank you for the stories, thank you for sharing your struggles so I know I'm not alone. Thank you for making me smile while I really don't feel like smiling about anything else.

Some people are jerks, and they are probably very unhappy with their own lives if they have to attack you. How miserable do you have to be to sit and read a blog that you don't even like? Geez, I thought I spent too much time online @@

Dodson Family said...

Girl...
You have to take care of you and your kids first and foremost...

You keep on keepin on!

Angela said...

YOU. GO. GIRL. !!!!!!!!!!!! Please feel the love I'm sending your way and thank you for continuing to blog!!!! I think you're the BOMB DIGGITY!!!!!!!

Robin said...

Judge not least ye be judged...may God continue to bless you and your home, Dawn. You are truly and inspiration.

Much love,
Robin E. from Mississippi

Winona said...

You go girl, indeed. I've got some good friends who have recently divorced and in a far healthier manner... and it's still hard, and I know that both of them are enduring criticism from "friends" and family. I will admit I don't know the entire story on both sides, and it's not my business anyway, but I support both of them and love them. Please know that there's quite a few of us out here who have your back, Dawn.

Kristine said...

Don't let them get to you Dawn. It's obvious that you love your kids, and are doing you best given your circumstances. I think many of us wish we could change those circumstance for you!

AuntyM said...

Good for you!

The nerve of some people thinking that they can give you what-for and/or criticize your life. That is just rude to say the least.

Nobody has the right to tell you how to live your life.

I'm glad you have a good friend in Victor. It's wonderful and I'm happy for you.

God bless you and your lovely family.

Clare said...

Well I'm glad I just signed up to blogger and google-thingy then as I like to comment on your blog;)

lbugsh2 said...

You are a amazing women. I read your blog every day and it makes me smile. Being a mother of only four where I live makes me catch a lot of crap. Its nice to see another strong women making it.
Thank you for all your wonderful writing.

Out on a Limb said...

Way to go, Dawn!! You're doing the best you can and you don't owe everyone an explanation. It's obvious you love your children and you're doing the best for them. I love reading your blog and I am truly excited that you and Spuds have found support in each other. It's wonderful.

Rock on, Super Mom!

dark_chocolate said...

Yup, there are a lot of people in the world that are too dumb for words. I'm glad you are not letting them make you feel down. It is YOUR life and mean people should BUZZ OFF and get a life!! Hugs to you and your kids!

Sharon said...

Go girl, I'm glad that you told them off and wish you could have used a few of the bad words I've been thinking about them. I was shocked that anyone would have a bad thing to say about your blog. I think it's wonderful and please keep up the good work. Small minded people (idiots) need to get a life and stay out of other's or just don't visit that blog if it's so distastful to them. I love your blog and have the utmost respect for you and your family. Thank You for sharing a part of your life with us.
Sharon W.

heyitsbeej said...

"I make mistakes. I screw up. But I keep going."

And that, darlin', is what makes you fabulous. No wait...Dawntastic! Yeah!

Ilene Woods said...

Hang in there Dawn! Forget the haters! You have been bringing smiles & laughs to so many of us for years now. There are many of us who understand your type of situation (though we dont have or need the details). You are the kind of Mom who does right by her kids, even when right isn't the easy choice. I AGREE that sometimes staying together for the kids is NOT the right choice. As a kid I used to pray to God that my parents would get divorced. When they finally did it was painful but actually offered me a chance at peace. And an opportunity to see them happy for once. I am proud of you. (Not that it matters cause you don't really know me...but I am!)

Jacqui said...

LOVE looking your blog up everyday and looking for a new post! Been following you for a few years now. Think you are one of the coolest bravest Moms out there and I hope I can have at least half your strength as my kids get older!!!!

Missi said...

Dawn, I'm very sorry you had/have to deal w/ all the haters leaving you nasty comments about nothing they know anything about but think they do.

I love reading your blog & hearing about all the things your kiddos do.

You are an awesome mom!

Petra said...

I've been reading your blog off and on for a long time. I admire you for being so candid in English, I stopped writing in English, because it felt too "naked". Too many people can read that language, so I switched to Dutch. Even so, I still get those anonymous nasty comments once in a while. Funny, how they still sting, despite being anonymous, huh? Luckily the vast majority of comments is nice, though.

JennyF said...

I LOVE the fact that you have a form for hate mail! That is hilarious!

But truly, you ARE taking care of your kids by taking care of yourself. Leaving a less-than-loving marriage is the best thing you can do for your kids, especially your girls. What a great example you've set for them and their own future relationships.

No one walks on Mommy -- NO ONE!

nutralady2001 said...

OK so I was so traumatised by the kool-Aid scene I attached a comment on this post to the one there.......that and the fact I haven't had my 2nd coffee yet.

Agree with all the above. As I said you don't need to explain to a bunch of strangers on the Net why you got divorced anyone who has been with you for a while would know you didn't do it lightly and there is a LOT you never blogged about.

Be happy Dawn you deserve it x

Sharon said...

You Rock Dawn! Don't let the nasty posters get you down. They haven't walked a mile in your shoes!

Sue R said...

Dawn, I found out my marriage was ending just before the 30th anniversary, and the divorce was final 10 months ago. No one really knows or can judge what happens inside of someone else's marriage. I'm sorry you got so much nastiness from others. It's not a decision anyone goes into lightly, whether initiator or receiver of the divorce papers. I was "the dumpee" but even so, I am glad now I am no longer with a person who for a long time didn't want to be with me. He had a long list of how I wasn't good enough. Hang in there. It gets better!

bubblebutt1975 said...

I love you Dawn... Might not mean much since we have never really 'met' but sometime you are the only bright spot in my day! So I just wanted you to know that there is a crazy lady in Australia that thinks you are awesome!!!!!

I am guessing 'Blog-World' is a lot like living in a small town... Lots of petty opinions of people who don't really know you and who you don't really care about! The town is saved only by those who love and accept you for the wonderful being you are!

Deb from Sydney said...

Dawn you are worth soooo much more than those clowns who leave abusive anon feedback.

Beth said...

Love you Dawn! I hope that you and Spuds have a wonderful freindship or whatever may come. And I'm sorry for the stinky people who can't keep their bad comments to themselves. Like my Grandmother always said "If you can't say something nice don't say a damn word!"

Janice said...

A writers blog I read stopped allowing comments because of the idiots who left nasty comments. Hang in there.

Maria said...

Hi Dawn,
I've been reading your blog for about two years and this is the first time I leave you a comment. (shame on me, I know)
But anyway, I just wanted to drop you a line and tell you that I love reading your posts, I think you are a wonderful woman and anyone would be lucky to call you a friend.
Ignore the haters, they don't deserve your attention.
Live your life, enjoy your amazing kids and keep on writing... I know I'll keep on reading :)

imsilentnomore said...

I am one of those readers that has been reading for a long time but I rarely comment. I am pretty sure your blog was one of the first I ever read and it is part of the reason I started blogging. I completely understand and relate to staying in a marriage for much longer than I should have "for the kids". While there are aspects of being married that I miss, I am a far better mom now that I don't have that stress of trying to keep a sinking ship afloat.

Dawn, Thanks for sharing even a little part of your life.

PamGram said...

In my best cheerleader chant:GO DAWN,GO DAWN,GO DAWN! You are awesome.I'm so glad and lucky to have found your blog thru a scrapbook message board.You are a fantastic writer and MOM.Your humor helps me at times get thru 4adult kids and 1 teen and makes me remember how FUN it was and sometimes/most times it still is. Thank you for you being you. And thanks for the link to Spud's blog,love it too.{{hugs}}

April said...

What is wrong with people? If they were good followers they would know when you mentioned your separation you said that you would not talk about it on here in respect of your kids. Most importantly, they would know where to send the hate mail. I suspect the parties responsible for the horrible comments have 6 kids and one of those husband who has an amazing body, loves her body (boobs down to the knees and all), puts her needs before his own, does the dishes and laundry, prepares nutritious meals, chauffeurs the kids around, asks if there is anything more he can do to help, tells her that she needs to spend the day at the spa, insists she go out for good old fashioned girls nights out when the kids have really tried her patience, and his idea of a vacation is flying to the destination and staying in a hotel or condo….now I must clean up the drool off my keyboard for thinking about that. Do you know if such a man exists?

Cris said...

HI Dawn. Unlike most of your readers, I'm not a mom, not a parent. In fact, I'm a single man staring 40 in the face and have realized I'll probably never be a parent. I only found your blog because of a google search for "Brooklyn". But I've been reading for some time and you always make me laugh.

My sister (two kids) recently divorced and I think it was the best thing for everybody. Sure, things are difficult for her, but she's free of the dead weight.

Your choice was no doubt the right one; you don't have to justify it to anybody.

Kate said...

I love reading your blog. Reading here always makes me smile. It is a wonderful reminder of what REAL motherhood is!! I am glad you are taking steps to protect your self from the negative. How dare people judge a situation that they no nothing about. My parents divorced when I was 12...and thank god they did!!!

And...Spuds...you made me tear up, he is right, you are an strong, beautiful woman!!!!

Paula71 said...

You said it Dawn. I agree with you on the Spuds thing. What happens is your business and yours alone. Everyone needs someone to talk to and you have found that person. Hooray for you being able to get those ANONS off here. I never update my blogs but I follow many.

Lesley said...

There are always nasty people who love to critise others - they must lead very sad lives thats all I can say.
And maybe should read what Jesus said about hypocrites.

nine.harlow said...

Dawn
I've said it before...You are awesome! Thanks for making me laugh so much in the last few years. Boo! to those you leave nasty-grams. Cowards!

Jensamom23 said...

Keep your chin up, Dawn!

jenniegee said...

I signed up just for joo. I, too, hate that you even need a post like this. I don't need to understand the innerworkings of why you do what you do.. I have read long enough to know that the kids are your life and everyone else can stick it.
I am guilty of Spuds asking info but it really comes from a place of being very happy that you found someone you like and can relate too. And sorry if this is too much but you guys are cute as heck when you banter.
I'll never stop reading and respecting the way you handle all of your business. xo

Kris Roach said...

People can be such judgemental jerks....I think you are amazing...don't know how you keep your sanity. Keep up the good work...you are an inspiration!

Amanda said...

I'm really sorry you have to deal with rudeness on top of everything else. You're great.. hang in there!

Sarah said...

Way to go, Dawn~! You don't need some judgmental, holier-than-thou person who has absolutely NO IDEA what you have been through telling you how to run your life. Hang in there. You are doing an incredible job and you are an awesome woman!

Donna said...

Dawn.... have you ever thought maybe the bad comments come from Joe or his family ?
Don't let any of them rile you up.
Hang your head high and ignore stupidity !
You know we all love you !!!

Donna from NE Indiana

faithlessone said...

Nothing really to say, but I am sending you many positive thoughts. Big hugs!

Nikki said...

I started reading after the Pokemon cards. I don't comment often but I always read. Thank you for sharing the parts of your life you do. I'm sorry that some people just feel the need to be nasty. I love your blog and your style of writting. You are doing a great job! YEAH YOU!
Peace

hrunars said...

You rock! Don't let them get you down! Love the hate-mail space :D

Michelle said...

Awww, it's a shame there are people out there who feel better about themselves by cutting others down. :( We're just doing our best with what we've been given. I feel like a lazy slug reading about your vacation and I have no idea how you function on so little sleep. Keep up the good work, and good for you blocking the hateful people!

Rachel said...

A big hug and YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!

Gilda said...

Dawn - We never met & yet for several years, I've turned to you daily as a bright spot in my day. I'm not a mom (missed out on that blessing) but I so admire you & appreciate the wonderful mom ~and woman~ you are. You are amazing, my friend & I'm happy for your new friendship & would be delighted for you if it blossoms into something deeper. You deserve only good things & good thoughts!

Stephanie J said...

Dawn, I have never commented before but I read your blog on a regular basis. My Mom stayed married to my Dad for many years for me. My parents separated for a few months when I was 7. My Dad was moved from Washington state (where we lived) to Ohio and my Mom didn't want me to grow up without my Dad, so she agreed to try again. We moved to Ohio with my Dad. They got a divorce my senior year of college (14 years later) when my Mom realized that life was too short for her to be so unhappy. As I have gotten older and discussed things with my Mom, I think back and wonder how much of it was a lie. I wonder if the times that I remember as happy, were really happy. I go as far as wondering if life would have been better had she let him move across the country and get divorced when I was 7. My Mom and I are very close now, but I hate the fact that she gave up 14 years of her life because she thought she was doing what was best with me. I think it is wonderful that you are strong enough to make the hard choice in order to prove your love for your children. There are always going to be people who think you are doing something wrong but always remember that they are not living your life and they have no right to judge you. As for your friendship with Spuds: I was on vacation and not online for a little while (the same time you were on vacation). When I logged on facebook and saw that you two were meeting up, I got the biggest smile on my face and was super excited for both of you. I started reading his blog after you first commented about him and now read them both. Everyone needs someone they can talk to and that makes them laugh. You deserve to be happy and the happier you are, the happier your kids will be. Hope you have a great week.
Stephanie

annie said...

Keep bloggin', we love your work Dawn!

Cheers
Annie

Holly C. said...

You rock, pretty lady!!!

Stephanie Honeycutt said...

you have my support dawn! you rock!

vadercat2006 said...

Hey. It's me Natasha... this is my email. I never used to use it before 'cause I never had'ta, but I'll use it now so you'll know it's me... so yeah, that's all... oh and the person who said that is some idiot who needs to get a life.

Chris Bean said...

We love you, Dawn =)

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