I didn't mean to sound like a big downer last night. Things are actually pretty good around here. I'm just having a hard time taking care of stuff and working/writing. It's difficult, but not impossible by any means. I'm thankful that I have writing as a source of income even if it means staying up until 3:00 to get any writing done.
I'm not big on chore charts. I've tried them a few times in the past and it just seemed like more of a job for me to make out the charts and check them, than it was worth. As long as I remember to ask the kids to help instead of just expecting them to know what I want, everything gets done without too much complaining. The kids don't complain much either. ;) Actually, after dinner, I was sitting at the table working on my taxes when I noticed Clay picking up the family room. He was straightening the backpacks and picking up pillows. He put DVDs on the shelf and put toys away in his room. He picked up stray pieces of garbage and threw them away. He did this all by himself! He did this without me asking! After falling off my chair in utter disbelief, I
I love the idea of freezing meals though. Duh, why didn't I think of that? I've been telling friends that I'm sick of throwing out food and I need to learn to change my cooking habits. Joe used to eat so much and used to eat leftovers and I don't have that anymore. The kids and I aren't too fond of leftovers, so after dinner, I put whatever food is left in the fridge where it sits for a week and then I throw it out. It's our tradition. From now on, I'll freeze the leftovers immediately and pull them back out in a month and tell the kids, "Huh? Nooo, these aren't leftovers. No, I um, I just made this. Tonight. Just now. Oh, I um, already washed the pots and pans. Just sit down and eat!"
Anyway, I actually have a strange peace about everything. I don't know how to explain it. I just believe that everything will work out in the end. Things may not work out how I envision them, but still, they'll work out. We're hoping to stay in our house, but may end up having to move. I hope that doesn't happen, but if it does, it'll be fine. Something will open up and we'll have a place to live. I have no idea where, but I just believe that something will work out for us. Joe will come around or he won't. I have no control over that. All I'm going to do is make sure my kids know that they are loved unconditionally by me and by God. God is holding us in His palm and He loves us. He'll take care of us and all we have to do is trust and believe in Him.
I was talking to my friends Sue and Dawn the other day. Dawn's husband died very suddenly and unexpectedly leaving her a single mother to five children. Sue's husband has been out of work for a year now. Both friends and I commented that we don't know how people with no faith get by in tough situations like these. How do they hold onto hope? How do they feel joy despite the hardships? How do they feel a sense of calm; a sense of peace; a sense that everything will work out and God will provide even if they can't see the light at the end of the tunnel? I have no idea. I totally believe it's God (with the help of prayer) that has placed this sense of peace in my heart. It's by the grace of God that I go on every day with a smile on my face (well, most of the time anyway), and try to enjoy the day and the gifts and blessings that I have. It's all good. :)
Oh and I don't plan on leaving the blog. Just wanted you guys to know what was going on so you're not surprised if I skip a day or two here and there. You can't get rid of me that easily!