Your 3-year-old insists on wearing pink wool knee socks with her bathing suit to the pool. You....
A. ...tell her you won't leave for the pool until she takes the socks off and puts her sandals on.
B. ...don't want to squash her budding interest in fashion. You let her wear the socks and hope that her latest outfit will land her on What Not to Wear, and after Stacy and Clinton get over their heart palpitations, she'll get a whole new wardrobe.
C. ...don't even notice her socks because your son and his friend have taken all the couch cushions off and are using them like a trampoline, you teenager is begging you to let her go to her friend's house, and 2 of your other kids are throwing their toothbrushes at each other for some odd reason.
Your 5-year-old son asks you if he can have a mohawk. You...
A. ...put your foot down and inform him, in no uncertain terms, that you will NOT let him look like a punk.
B. ...realize it's just hair and hair grows out. You know this is a sign of self-expression so you take him to the barber to get his mohawk.
C. ... tell him, "Sure!" then totally forget about it until you see the pile of hair on the floor and you discover that his brother went ahead and gave him a, well, um, it's sort of like a mohawk.
Your 5-year-old scales the shelves in the garage to get the lighter fluid and a lighter, then he proceeds to try to
A. ... freak out, spank his butt, send him to his room, and threaten to send him to juvenile hall.
B. ... say, "Eh, the garage is falling apart anyway. It could use some major remodeling."
C. ... decide this is the perfect excuse to invite some hot firemen over to
Your baby drops her pacifier on the ground. You...
A. ...pick it up, put it in a special pacifier pouch, take it home and run it through the dishwasher to sanitize it.
B. ... pour some bottled water on the pacifier to clean it off.
C. ... pick it up out of the mud, wipe it on your shirt, pop it back in baby's mouth and assure yourself that germs build up the immune system.
Your 13-year-old daughter asks if she can meet a boy at the pool. You...
A. ... say, "No way, Missy! Now, put on your burqa and sit down and watch those Little House on the Prairie DVDs I got you!"
B. ... understand that she's growing up and let her have the freedom to meet a boy in a public place, trusting that you've taught her well.
C. ... say, "Yes! And take your brothers and sisters with you!" then go take a nap in peace and quiet.
I was going to assign points to each answer, but I decided that, much like Who's Line Is It Anyway?, the points don't matter. All I will say is that Clay is now sporting a mohawk.