So I ran out and got a new garage door opener 2 days ago. I stood there in the aisle at Home Depot just staring at the shelf of openers. 1/2 HP, 3/4 HP, keypad entry, whisper quiet, hmmmm. Most expensive = safest? Sure, I'll go with that. So, I started to grab a box off the shelf and came to the realization that THESE THINGS ARE HEAVY! Since I didn't want to give myself a hernia (not because of the pain, but because I know my house and everything in it would fall apart while I was out of commission), I grabbed a nearby, abandoned cart. I hoisted the opener into the cart where it landed with a thud. Then I started pushing the cart to the front to check out. About two feet later, I learned why the cart had been abandoned in the middle of the store. The loudest screeching, squealing, squeaks came from the cart. Shoppers and employees alike, gave me dirty looks while clamping their hands over their ears as I passed by. I debated taking the garage door opener out of the cart and just carrying it the rest of the way to spare everyone's hearing, but deciding that I'd probably drop it and have to kind of scoot it to the front with my feet, opted to leave the opener in the cart and make everyone just deal with the ear piercing squeaks instead.
So I got to the front and went to one of those self check out counters. I lifted the box out of the cart, scanned the barcode and plopped it back into my defective shopping cart. The screen glared at me and told me to put my item in a shopping bag.
"Seriously? I have to bag this? It's not going to fit in a bag!"
The self check-out computer yelled at me, "Bag your item or we'll arrest you for shoplifting!"
I looked around helplessly. Was there no one in sight who could turn this stupid machine off? Where is the "skip bagging" option? "Hello? Are there any real people here???"
Finally a person sauntered over to see why I was holding up the line. "You need to bag it," she said.
I looked at her. I looked at the big box my new garage door opener was in. I looked back at her, eyebrows raised. Clueless girl didn't seem to catch my meaning, so I asked her, "Think I can just leave it here in my cart and pay for it? Please."
Eventually I got all checked out and delivered the opener into the less than eager hands of my husband. I figured it would be 5 years minimum before he got around to installing it, but he surprised me and started on it that night.
Yesterday he informed me that it didn't work. You see, a couple years ago our garage door was falling apart. Literally. We didn't have any money to replace it, but knew we needed to do something so Joe built a new one out of a little wood, recycled hardware, and some left-over paint. The tracks, the pulleys, springs, and other thingamajiggers weren't replaced because they were still working fine. Here's the deal though - this new garage door opener has all these safety features and every time the door starts to shake a little (because all the other parts are so old and a little off balance) it automatically stops. According to Mr. Fixit, we'll need to replace the whole darn thing. I'm not sure if we'll get someone to come out and take a look to see if it can be adjusted or we'll just unplug the whole thing and keep it closed. Maybe I'll just duct tape the kids to the wall so they can't go anywhere near the garage door.
On another note - I took the kids to Wisconsin on a field trip today, but I'm too tired to write about it tonight. I'll update with pics tomorrow...