My Yaya - the Centenarian!

My Yaya (grandma in Greek) Lavonne, will turn 100 years old this April 28th. I cannot even imagine how much she has seen and experienced in her 100 years on this earth; how dramatically things have changed in that time. I feel like things have changed so much in my life and I've only been around half the amount of time!

My Yaya has: 

2 children

4 grandchildren

8 great-grandchildren

1 great-great-grandchild (and a step great-great-grandchild, and two more great-great-grandchildren on the way)

My fondest memories of my grandma are visiting her in South Whitley, Indiana where she lived when I was a kid. I remember playing on the big porch of the white house and roller skating on the sidewalks. My sister and I thought my grandparents had the coolest basement because the stairs that led to it were in the garage, and they had a pool table down there. When we were little kids, my sister and I liked to play what we dubbed "b ball" wherein we rolled the balls back and forth across the table to each other. B ball caused many a smashed finger! There was a storage room with a huge plastic Santa, and toys like Lincoln Logs, those little canisters that mooed when you turned them over, and Halsam Elgo American plastic bricks. I can still smell that basement when I think about it. 

When the fire siren went off at noon, we knew it was time for our grandpa to come home for lunch, and we'd watch for him to come walking down the street. And down that street there was a park where we loved to play. They had all that awesome old playground equipment like teeter totters, a huge metal slide that would burn a layer of skin off your thighs if you slid down in the summer, and a merry-go-round that would fling kids off with its centrifugal force, and it would cause others to throw up. Good times!

South Whitley, Indiana is known for its bed races. That's right, bed races. They race beds down the street. Now, that was a fun event that left an indelible impression! And when we visited, we went to the hardware store for ice cream! Ice cream in a hardware store! We're talking small-town-America.

One time, when it was storming and I was scared, I remember my grandma carrying me out to their big porch while soothing me and telling me that thunder and lightning were nothing to be scared of. We stayed out there watching the rain fall and listening to the crackle of thunder roll across the sky.

And even better than visiting them at the "white house" was visiting them at their cottage on the lake. My sister and I spent our days feeding ducks, swimming, and playing with these giant plastic fish. After playing in the sand at the water's edge, we had to check for, and salt the leeches that inevitably stuck to us. In the evening, we caught lightning bugs and kept them in mason jars with holes punched through the lids, as nightlights. I remember waking up from a dream once, and thinking all the lightning bugs had escaped and were flying around the room. 

On the fourth of July, there was a pancake breakfast on the lake. It was literally on the lake and we'd take the pontoon boat out, get some pancakes from the temporary floating restaurant and have breakfast while cruising around. We fished from the end of the pier with our grandpa, and begged for rides in the motorboat. We ate strawberries from their patch until we got sick, and we eagerly awaited, money from our grandparents in hand, for the ice cream truck to come singing down the lane. That was so exciting for us because we didn't have ice cream trucks at home. My sister and I put on shows for my grandparents who graciously endured them and applauded as if we were on Broadway.

We played with paper dolls, and the neighbor's dog SueSue. We gobbled up my grandma's homemade apple dumplings with ice cream in the evening. And we'll never forget the time a tornado came through. We all hunkered down in the bathroom as the sky turned green and it sounded like a freight train was barreling through the yard. My frightened little sister just kept thinking, What if someone actually has to go to the bathroom while we're in here?

And when my grandparents moved to Florida, we visited them in the winter and it was such a treat to wear shorts and swim and bask in the sunshine. We got sunburned every darn time we visited because, despite their warnings about reapplying sunscreen, we knew everything and didn't heed their advice. We rode their bikes around the park and sat on their screened-in lanai reading books while my parents and grandparents enjoyed their pre-dinner cocktail of whiskey and Coke. My grandma always got us pecan rolls for breakfast when we visited. To this day, I think of visiting them in Florida when I have pecan rolls. We went with them to Homosassa Springs, Weeki Wachee to see the mermaids, and Epcot when it first opened.

And now my grandma is turning 100!

I would love, love, love it if you would consider sending my grandma, Lavonne a card. Yes, I know most of you don't actually know her, but if any of you are so inclined, she would be absolutely tickled to receive a bunch of birthday cards, especially since we can't have a big birthday bash for her because of Covid. In fact, she can only have two visitors, and next week they may have to quarantine again because of a positive case where she lives. If that happens, she'll be celebrating her 100th birthday alone.

The past year has been tough on all of us, but I think it has been particularly difficult for those in nursing homes/assisted/independent living situations. The residents have been so isolated. In an effort to keep them safe from infection, most places didn't allow visitors for a very long time, dining rooms and common areas were closed, and in cold areas (my grandma lives in Chicagoland) they couldn't even go outside for a walk and some fresh air. 

My grandma has macular degeneration which has impaired her eyesight greatly. This woman who inspected gas masks during WWII, who knitted and crocheted blankets for all of us grandkids and great-grandkids, and who made handcrafted Christmas ornaments for everyone, every single year from 1980 until 2015 has a hard time seeing the numbers on a clock now, so even watching TV isn't the entertainment it once was. It has been a very long year for her.

If you'd be so kind as to send her a card (I mean, 100 years is quite an accomplishment, right?!) please send it in care of my mom so she can bring them/read them to my grandma who can't see well enough to read them herself anymore. I would love to see her wall decorated with a bunch of birthday cards!

Lavonne Verkade

c/o Diana Damalas

12694 Golf View Dr.

Huntley, IL 60142

And here, in honor of her 100th birthday, is a little slideshow I put together. It's a few minutes long so don't feel obligated, but please feel free to watch if you're so inclined. It took a lot of hours and help from my mom and sis to get these pictures in chronological order! And unfortunately, I don't have pictures of her with her son and his family, or with her nieces and nephews, or other relatives. But I had fun looking at all these old pictures anyway!

My Smilebox Creation VIEW SLIDESHOW HERE

I Don't Remember Growing Older; When Did They?

Brooklyn cleaned her room this weekend. I mean, she keeps it clean and organized on a daily basis thanks to her obsessive compulsive tendencies, but she decided she wanted to move her furniture around and clean out her closet. She carried load after load of old toys into the family room and deposited them at my feet. First there were dolls. Then came the doll stroller, followed by a big bag of play food and cooking paraphernalia. This was followed by an assortment of Play-Doh. She brought out bags of clothes she'd outgrown, boots, roller blades, and a magic set complete with collapsible top hat. 

And I've gotta tell ya, I teared up. I legitimately got tears in my eyes. I swear I could hear Topol and Norma Crane singing the haunting strains of Sunrise, Sunset as I watched my15-year-old daughter pile up armfuls of playthings from days gone by. 

"Is this the little girl I carried? Is this the little boy at play? I don't remember growing older. When did they?"

This child, who I swear just yesterday was making PlayDoh waffles for me is currently learning how to drive. An actual car! This baby, who would throw a fit if I didn't put her pink cowboy boots on her little feet the moment she woke up, is now in high school. My youngest child has traded Bubble Guppies for Criminal Minds, her stuffed tiger for a ukulele, The Wiggles for One Direction, and her princess dress-up clothes for a cheer uniform and an obscenely extensive collection of hoodies.

Each milestone my kids hit is somewhat bittersweet. I'm thankful they're growing, learning, and developing as they should. I celebrate their achievements at the same time I mourn those discarded little-kid things. But I think it's making me especially sad with Brooklyn because she's my youngest. For over 26 years I've had kids. And now I feel like I just have small adults. 

When I started blogging in 2007, I wasn't sure I'd survive being a stay-at-home mom to six little mess-makers. People told me back when I had 6 kids, aged 11 and under, "Enjoy this time because the days are long, but the years are short." I took their well-intentioned advice with a nod, while listening to the fighting, whining, and general chaos emanating from my spawn, and thought - You enjoy it, ya psycho! I'm running away from home!"

But I have to admit there's a lot that I miss about those days. I get weepy when I look through photo albums of my babies' first years of life. I remember the smell of their fragile little newborn heads.

I remember the days when they thought I was smart. I reminisce about the times when I'd tuck them into bed, read them a story, and snuggle with them. Nowadays, they tuck me in after I fall asleep on the couch. 

My friends tell me I have a selective memory. They're probably right. I may be looking at the situation through rose-colored glasses. So when I get a little too sentimental about those days of yore, I remind myself that, while I cherish those times, I do NOT want to revisit them.

If you, like me, sometimes find yourself wishing you could turn back time, here are a few reasons to be happy you're out of that stage of life!

*  Kids refusing to eat the nutritious meal you slaved over, opting instead to eat half a cup of ketchup, five marshmallows, and a crayon.

*  Two words – car seats.

*  Chuck E. Cheese 

*  The 2 ½ hours it takes to get ready to go anyplace and the 5 pound diaper bag you have to lug around.

*  What IS that smell in the car??

*  The kid who slumps to the floor in a heap while screaming and crying in the middle of the grocery store because you did something as diabolical as telling him he can’t have the box with the picture of the cute kitty because it’s cat food. And you don’t have a cat.

*  Caillou

*  Trying to figure out if they’re crying because they’re hungry, tired, cold, hot, wet, poopy, or because today is Tuesday.

*  Diaper blow-outs

*  Sharpie drawings on the walls

*  Accidentally washing a disposable diaper and finding that gel all over everything for weeks

*  Finding sippy cups of milk under the couch a week later

*  Attempting to reason with your child about why they cannot run into the street, stick that screwdriver in the electrical outlet, eat grass, play with the dog poop, and on and on and on and on and on . . .

*  Kids waking you up at 5:00 am on a Saturday. (Now you have to wake them up at 5:00 in the evening!)

*  Potty training

*  The whole "I do it myself" phase.

What do you not miss about those little kid years?

It's Official. I'm A Crazy Cat Lady.

The other day Savannah posted this to our family group chat with the caption - Mom. 

What? What are you talking about! That doesn't sound like me.

And Now A Message From The Cat

I learned some fun new tricks this week! Brooklyn left her air pod case sitting on the couch the other day. I saw it and thought - Now that looks like a fun cat toy! How nice of Brooklyn to leave that for me to play with! I pounced on the case and flung it off the couch. Then I played soccer with it, batting it around the family room and into the kitchen. I gave it a good smack and it sailed across the kitchen floor and under the refrigerator! Score! I made the winning goal!

I guess Brooklyn didn't know that I'd knocked the case into the refrigerator goal because man, did she look for that case for a loooong time. She looked everywhere! It was hours before she retrieved it! And then she didn't even give it back to me so I could make another goal. That was disappointing.

I learned how to do another cool thing this week too. I mean, honestly, I already knew how to do this, but I mustered up the guts to give it a go this week. I was sitting on Mom's bed, crouched down, ready to pounce when my target walked by. I leapt from my perch as Mom passed the bed and hit her, square on the hip, where I dug in my claws lest I fall. I stuck to her like Velcro! Clinging to her jeans, I just laughed to myself as she muttered something about me being the suction cup Garfield that used to be on her car window in the 80s. I have no idea what that meant, but man, the look of surprise on her face as I stuck to her hip was pretty hilarious if I do say so myself!

I figured out how to get up close and personal with the TV too! I really like this show, and that Phoebe has this awesome song about a cat!

I can't wait to see what I can get into next week!

I Went Without A Phone For Almost 24 Hours! (And The Twitching Has Almost Completely Stopped Now.)

Several days ago my phone stopped working. Out of nowhere, it. just. stopped. I was playing Words With Friends and then, nothing. I employed my great technical knowledge which consists of turning the device off and on again. Only I couldn't even turn it off. I couldn't do anything. I stared at my black screen. The little white apple lit up for a couple minutes. Then it went black. Then the apple lit up. Then it went black. Repeat. And repeat. And repeat.

This occurred in the evening when no stores were open so there was nothing I could do. That would be stress-inducing enough, but my kids had taken my car and gone to Universal Studios for the day. The kids had been checking in with me throughout the day and I was worried they'd try to get ahold of me before they left to come home. And what if they went out to the car and it wouldn't start? Or what would they do if one of them tripped and broke their ankle? What if they got lost on the way home? Worrisome thoughts swirled around my head as I alternately stared at the blank screen, and attempted to turn the phone off again and again. More than once I thought - I know! I'll call them and let them know I can't text! 

Eventually, I thought to reach out to Savannah via Facebook messenger. She answered and was able to text the littles at Universal and let them know my phone wasn't working, and they could contact her if they needed anything.

I'm embarrassed to admit how many times I grabbed my phone that evening search up something . . . Nope. I picked it up to play a game . . . Nope. I tried to read the headlines, look at Facebook, check my email . . . Nope, nope, nope. I pulled out my phone so I could search the hours of the nearest AT&T store where I got my phone . . . Nope. Search IMDB to find the name of that one actor in the movie I was watching who looked so familiar . . . Nope. Add something to my grocery list . . . Nope. Check the weather for tomorrow . . . Nope.

The next day, feeling a little lost, I drove to the AT&T store and stood outside waiting for it to open. I pulled out my phone to check the time . . . Nope. Finally, a woman opened the door, a look of concern on her face at the undoubtedly rabid customer waiting not-so-patiently to rush through the portal like it was Black Friday and they were giving away iPhones.

In the end, she couldn't do anything to help, but tell me to go to an Apple store. I left AT&T and as I walked to my car, I grabbed my phone so I could call Apple and make an appointment . . . Nope. Okay, no problem, I'll just drive to the closest one and see if I can make an appointment there. I picked up my phone to put the address in my GPS . . . Nope. Defeated, I drove home so I could look up Apple stores and make an appointment on my computer. Unfortunately my wifi wasn't working. Because it goes out multiple times a day, every day. Because Spectrum sucks. And no matter how many times someone comes out to look at it, it still sucks. And unfortunately, I don't have a choice because my apartment complex has a deal with them. But that's another rant.

Frustrated, I woke up Clay and begged him to let me use his phone so I could make an appointment. Then I told him he had to stay up and come with me because I needed to use his phone's GPS in order to get to the only Apple store with appointment availability in central Florida which was 40 minutes away. And we all know I can't drive even 10 minutes away without getting lost.

So we got to the mall, checked in with the security guard monitoring the number of customers in the store, and got in the line of people waiting to get inside. 

As we inched along the socially distanced line, I glanced down and saw this:

"Do I do? Do I do what? What do I do?" I asked Clay. "I don't get it. Is this some sort of Apple thing?"

Clay looked down, then looked back up at me with this face - 😑

Grabbing me by the shoulders, he turned me around.

"Ohhhhh. Well, I feel stupid. I should probably document my stupidity. Because that's what I do." I pulled my phone from my pocket to take a picture . . . Nope. "Clay, will you take a picture of this sign for me?"

In the end, I learned that I am completely dependent on my phone.

Backing up to the cloud is a VERY good thing to do lest your phone has to be restored to factory settings.

Saving your Apple ID and password on your phone isn't very effective; making sure your kids know your Apple ID and password is.

And "Do I Do" means you should stand 6 feet away from others.

And Now A Message From the Cat

 

Hi. My name is Punkin, although I'm called KitKat, Snickerdoodle, and my favorite, Chicken Nugget more often than not. I look so adorable and innocent that no one can resist my cuteness. I'm three months old and I have many hobbies! For example, I like to hide under the bed and reach out to tap your feet as you walk by. I just love it when you freak out and scream! That never gets old! I also love pouncing on your feet when you try to sleep, and getting up really close to your face and tickling you with my whiskers to wake you up. It's hilarious when you go on and on about having a heart attack!

I enjoy jumping in the shower as soon as you get out and then walking around, shaking my feet repeatedly because did you know the shower floor is wet??? It's wet every single day, but I keep jumping in anyway because I figure one of these days it'll be dry.

One of my favorite things to do is help you type on your laptop. I am an expert writer! I don't know why you don't see the extent of my genius! ljvcuuuudw5`1

I also love, love, love pooping in my litter box two seconds after you've cleaned it out. Classic!

One of my absolute favorite games to play is called Jump in the Fridge as Soon as Someone Opens It! It's especially funny to see your reaction when you think I'm not around and then I dart out of nowhere to jump in the fridge.

Another fun game to play is when I weave around your feet as you walk. I haven't made any of my people fall yet, but the old one has come close. Any day now! It's also entertaining to headbutt your hand as you try to fill my food dish.

I used to enjoy climbing up the tablecloth, but for some reason you never use a tablecloth anymore. But that's okay because I just learned another fun diversion last night. I open and close your bedroom door repeatedly while you try to sleep. Open, close, open close, open close . . . 

I just can't wait to see what fun things I learn to do in the next three months!

What School Really Looks Like This Year

When a student fails a class, they get put into course recovery where they have to essentially retake the class and pass it in order to get the credit. Students aren't held back here. Even students who fail all four of their core classes are promoted to the next grade and put into course recovery for all four classes. That's the four failed classes on top of their regular classes for that year.

This year I have seven periods of students in course recovery. Almost all of the kids who did school-from-home for the first semester failed one or more classes. It's painfully obvious that the majority of kids learning from home, were not successful. I don't think anyone would argue that point as the data overwhelmingly shows that kids are more successful with in-person learning. 

Beyond the difficulties with at-home learning (kids who aren't motivated and/or aren't held accountable by parents, kids who don't have reliable internet access, kids who just have a hard time grasping the material when it's taught online, etc.) there's the mental health issue. The unprecedented increase in mental health problems, addiction, and suicidal ideation coupled with limited mental health services in many areas due to Covid-19 is undeniably exacerbated by the isolation that comes with at-home learning.

Now don't get me wrong. I am not, in any way, saying that all kids should be in school, in person, every day. I think there is no one perfect solution to the problem of school during a pandemic. There is no ideal answer. There is nothing that is universally in everyone's best interests, and there's certainly not any one solution that will make everyone happy.

Let me tell you what it looks like in my school. I'm in Florida. In this state, the governor told schools that if they want funding, they have to open up for in-person learning in August. Period. So we did. And I get why this was a blessing for many families. Parents of young children need someone to watch their kids while they work. No school ---> no work ---> no paycheck ---> no money for food or rent ---> homelessness. For many, the thought of financial ruin trumped concerns over safety. Also, parents who worried about their student's mental health at home and parents who were concerned their child wouldn't do well online could send them back to school in person. It's nice that parents in this state had a choice between in-person and at-home learning. They could make the decision that was best (or was the least awful) for their family.

Unfortunately, that left teachers and support staff without any choice. We had to go back to school in person. We had to spend our days in a classroom with 6-7 periods of different students every day. During the first semester, a few teachers were able to apply for a medical exemption that enabled them to teach from home to the students who were learning from home. But when the second semester rolled around and nearly every student was back to school in person, all teachers were ordered back to campus as well. I've honestly lost track of how many teachers from my school have quit since the beginning of this school year. I can think of nine offhand as I write this. Those are nine positions that needed to be/still need to be filled. Now imagine every school in my state having similar staffing problems, and we're all trying to hire teachers from an ever-dwindling pool of candidates.

On top of that, there are the teachers who get sick and are out because of it. There are the teachers who are exposed to someone with Covid and have to stay home to quarantine for several days. And, of course, there are the teachers who need surgery, have dentist appointments, need to stay home with a sick child, have car troubles . . . I've spent the last couple years complaining about a substitute shortage. Ha! Little did I know what we were in for this year. 

According to the Orange County Classroom Teachers Association, there were a staggering 11, 571 unfilled absences from August through November. And I know firsthand that it's only gotten worse. Today, for example, at my school there were 12 teachers out. We only had 3 subs so 9 classes were uncovered. Yesterday was the same. This past Friday there were 16 teachers out, 9 of their classes uncovered. Thursday there were 11 uncovered classes. So every day, the secretary has to scramble to get someone to watch every class, every period. Office clerks, librarians, paras, administrators, and other personnel get shuffled into classrooms. I've seen the bookkeeper and secretary cover classes. I honestly wouldn't be surprised to see a lunch lady or a custodian watching a classroom full of kids at this point. 

This year, I've had to cover another teacher's classes in addition to my own seven classes almost every single day. And let me tell you, it is sucking the life out of me! There is very little social distancing when you're combining two classes. Trying to help my 8th graders with their course recovery work in language arts, math, science, and history while explaining ancient Chinese philosophers to a bunch of sixth graders is not fun. Watching sixth graders whose assignment is to play a review game while trying to get 8th graders to focus on a test at the same time is not fun. Telling students a thousand times a day to "pull up your mask!" is not fun. Going to work this year is not fun.

When a bunch of Covid cases hit one school, they close the school for two weeks. They deep clean the building while students learn from home in an effort to stop the spread of Covid before it gets out of control. When this recently happened at a high school in my district, I saw someone on Facebook have a fit about it. She ranted that it was her kid's right to attend school. She was livid they'd briefly closed the school to try to keep people safe. And I shook my head at the absolute self-centered, entitled attitudes of some people. 

These teachers are friggin' rock stars! On top of the ridiculous amount of work they already have, this year they've been juggling teaching the kids who are seated in front of them as well as teaching the kids who are online at home. At the same time! We are all stretched so thin this year, and we're doing our best to make sure your kids are successful, all while trying to ensure everyone follows the guidelines so we can all stay safe and healthy. And when I see some selfish rant from a parent, I've gotta tell ya, I get a pretty impressive urge to throat-punch that parent. 

Whatever the school situation is in your state and your district, for the love of God, show your child's educators some grace. Remember, there is no perfect solution. What makes one person happy will inevitably make others angry and vice versa. We're all trying to navigate these uncharted waters and make the best decisions we can. For most of us in the education system, it has been a tough year no matter how you slice it. So whether you agree with what your state and district are doing or not, please understand that the teachers and support staff are all doing our best with what we have. And we're doing it for your kid. So - Just. Be. Nice.