I'm Running Away

This afternoon I decided I was going to run away from home. Brooklyn doesn't nap anymore and hasn't for a long time. However, she sometimes falls asleep in the early evening before bedtime. Then she'll wake up around 10:00 PM and be wide awake party-girl for hours. She did this last night. She finally fell asleep at 2:00 AM. No problem except I didn't get any work done last night, so I attempted to do it today. Big mistake. Big. Huge. Brooklyn was stroppy (I was talking to friend from across the pond last night. I'm being British today.) because she didn't get enough sleep last night so she spent the morning whining. I mean, more than usual. Clay saw this as an opportunity to make me insane bug her and make her scream all day. Those two usually get along smashingly.

Because I was trying to work, Clay decided to do a 'speriment. This experiment of his consisted of filling a huge bowl with water.

He did this in his bedroom.

Let's take a closer look, shall we?

To this bowl, he added a variety of things. I was going to list them all, but I think it'll be more fun to make a contest out of it. I haven't done a gross food find contest in a while. Leave me a comment and let me know what you think he put in this 'speriment of his to win a $10 Dunkin' Donuts card. The first person to guess all the ingredients will win. Or if no one gets it right, the first person to guess the most ingredients will win. I'll announce the winner on Monday.

When I saw it, I calmly asked, "CLAYTON!!! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING?!!! I THOUGHT YOU AND BROOKLYN WERE PLAYING IN THERE! WHAT IS THIS??? WHY, WHY WHYYYYYY???!!!!"

He looked at me, taken aback, then he proudly announced, "It's my 'speriment!"

"Your 'speriment? What kind of experiment is this? Why did you do this?"

"I wanted to see it explode," came his simple answer.

"You wanted to see it explode? Did you think a bowl of [these ingredients] would explode???"

"Yes."

"Brilliant." sigh "Clayton, what am I going to do with you? Take this outside please. Now."

I basically accomplished nothing all day other than baking 50,000 cookies for Lexi's Brownie meeting tonight. It's International Night which means every troop selects a country and brings food to represent their country. At least I don't have to cook dinner tonight. Actually, scratch that. It was my goal to bake 50,000 cookies, but I only made about 50 because I had to stop too many times to yell at talk to the kids.

I left Austin and Savannah in charge of the two little ones for ten minutes while I picked the middle kids up from school. I got two phone calls from Savannah while I was gone. Two calls in ten minutes. Two calls complaining that Austin was being mean to Clay and that Austin was hitting her.

When I got home, both she and Austin were in tears. I learned my lesson years ago about trying to figure out who started it and who did what to whom. They were both sent to their rooms. On the bright side, I can count on one hand the times that those two have fought. They actually get along swimmingly. Unfortunately, the few times they have fought have been brutal. I may have to ground them until next year.

When Lex got home from school and took off her coat, I saw that she was wearing a sundress. It was 40 here today. How did I not notice that this morning??? Oh yeah, I hadn't had my coffee yet. Her teacher must think I'm an idiot.

Jackson had the orchestra presentation at school yesterday. You know, the one where they come in and let the kids try out the instruments and then say stuff like, "Don't you want to join orchestra? Tell your parents you want to join orchestra. Come on, all the cool kids are doing it. If your parents love you, they'll let you join." So Jackson's been badgering me non-stop about letting him join orchestra. I don't, quite frankly, have the money to put out on yet another instrument right now. Plus, I know Jackson and I know he'll get bored with it in a couple weeks. None of his friends are doing it and I know Jackson will be bummed about that. In order to join orchestra, you need to sign up for summer school. I don't like putting the kids in summer school. I like having free time over the summer. I like being able to pick up and go to the zoo, camping, vacation, field trips, picnics, parks, whatever. I know Jackson will be mad come this summer when he has to go to school, whether he admits it or not. And I know the other kids would be resentful that we couldn't take off and do anything because Jackson has to stay and go to school.

Anyway, because I told him, "Not this year," he started throwing things around the house while telling me how much he hated me and what a bad mother I am.

"You're the worst mom ever!"

"Really? You think I'm the WORST? Yes! Woo Hoo!!! I'm the worst mother EVER!" (Cheering like that really ticks them off.)

When Joe got home, I told him, "Have fun with YOUR children. I'm running away." Then I made a quick escape. Of course, a few minutes after I left, I got the text that Savannah's softball bag was in my van. She was on her way to practice. "I give up," I muttered to myself. I can't even run away for 10 minutes.