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Then in the 90s and early 2000s when my oldest kids were young, we put them in some sports. You know how I knew what time their practices were? The coach told us at the beginning of the season. Practices are Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays from 6:00 - 7:30. I didn't get reminders every day. I knew when practice was and I brought my kids at the appointed time. Like magic.
Then came the smart phone and people turned into idiots.
Case in point - I, along with about 25 other parents, was added to a group text for Brooklyn's cheer team. Now this could be a handy tool for communicating. It could be if the other people involved employed any sort of texting etiquette, or you know, common sense. It could go like this:
COACH: Remember practice tonight 630 to 8
The end. That's it. Everyone in the text group would receive ONE text reminder just in case one went stupid and forgot that practice is Tuesday and Thursday from 6:30 - 8:00 just like it has been for the past 2 months.
But that's not how it works. That is literally never how it works. Instead, our phones (namely MY phone!) get a dozen pings with very, very important messages that everyone needs to know like this:
The end. That's it. Everyone in the text group would receive ONE text reminder just in case one went stupid and forgot that practice is Tuesday and Thursday from 6:30 - 8:00 just like it has been for the past 2 months.
But that's not how it works. That is literally never how it works. Instead, our phones (namely MY phone!) get a dozen pings with very, very important messages that everyone needs to know like this:
COACH: Remember practice tonight 630 to 8
CRIP (Clueless Rude Inconsiderate Parent): Jada will not be able to make it she pulled her groin muscle and can barely walk straight. See you Tuesday
CRIP: Ok we'll be there
CRIP: Kayla won't be there she has strep throat
CRIP: Ok we'll be there
CRIP: Kayla won't be there she has strep throat
CRIP: Thanks
CRIP: Kayla won't be there tonight.
CRIP: I'll have to try and get Kay a ride cause Kayla was Kayleigh's ride today. Husband is working nights now and I have 3 of the 4 needing to be placed
CRIP: places
CRIP: Ok
CRIP: Hailee won't be there tonight
CRIP: Hailee will be back next week
CRIP: Bella will be there at 6:30
[sic]
And here's me . . .
[sic]
And here's me . . .
via GIPHY
There is NO NEED to respond to a text that simply provides information, especially when there are 25 other people whose phones will ping with that text. If a coach reminds you there's practice, you don't not need to replay "Okay" or "Thanks" or anything else. Just show up to practice.
There is also NO NEED to tell everyone in the group chat that your husband is working, or your kid can't make it to practice, or that your kid has a groin injury. Tell the coach. She's the ONLY one who needs to know this.
I'm convinced that hell is a group chat. A group chat that you. can. NEVER. EVER. leave.
This is so INCREDIBLY true! Well, said. Group texts that people respond to are my biggest pet peeve. My kids always cringe when I get added to a group text and my phone starts to explode. They fear how I will respond, because I always threaten to be the one who texts the group (after several pointless responses) saying: ‘This is a group text. If you need to respond directly to the coach, then do so in a SEPERATE text. Duh.’ I have only responded like that once. Unfortunately I suspect there will be other opportunities. I assume that people are just bored and feel happier/busier when their phones are lighting up. Nauseating.
ReplyDelete*ping*
ReplyDeleteOr works nights! Ping ping ping ping!
ReplyDeleteSo it's not just our phones that ping, ping, ping?!?
ReplyDeleteI like the one that say “do not respond to this text” then ping, ping, ping....oh the stupidity and need to text!
ReplyDeleteReading this I first thought you were absolutely right. Absolutely. Honestly. Period.
ReplyDeleteOn second thoughts, however, I must admit I wonder why you don't mute your phone if you don't want it to ping. It's your fault, really, isn't it? I know you want to get those pings in the case of important messages only - but who knows what you consider important... Perhaps they think you don't want to be left out of anything, that's why they send you the messages about X not being able to go to practice, too.
Third thought: I'm afraid you (and me) are way too old to understand the generation that can only exist online. The one that feels neglected if they don't get at least a dozen pings per minute... There are more and more of them. Some of them are parents already. Others are coaches. It's getting more and more difficult to get away from their annoying ways - unless we switch off our phones. Or mute them at least. We know that there is life without phones, too. There used to be at the end of the previous century, so there still must be. Let's get offline then.