Thursday, December 29, 2011

Just One More Level!

I don’t generally play video games. It’s not because we don’t own a gaming system. It’s not because I don’t like them. It’s not because my kids play 24 hours a day, not giving me a chance to try it out. It’s because, well um, it’s because I may have a major addiction little, small, almost nonexistent problem with self control when it comes to video games.

I can’t help it.  I try.  I really do.  But when I start playing, I get sucked into the game.  It’s like Tron and I’m IN the game.  I’m no longer sitting on the couch with a controller in my hand, oh no.  I’m not controlling the little guy on the screen, making him move, jump, and shoot bad guys.  My blood pressure goes up, I hyperventilate, and my palms sweat because, clearly, jumping out of the way of balls of boiling hot lava is a matter of life or death.  Not my little video game guy’s life or death, but my life or death.  Running away from guys who are shooting at me, maneuvering my hovercraft around crates of explosives, and balancing on floating rocks perched above a bottomless pit freak me out to the point of cold sweats. 

My kids make fun of me because apparently normal people don’t get so worked up when playing video games.  They like to tell me things like, “Mom, why do you keep lifting the controller up? You know it doesn’t help when you move it like that”, “Mom, it doesn’t help when you hit the buttons that hard”, “Mom, calm down, the vein in your head is bulging out.”

After playing games for hours a short time, I got behind the wheel of my car to go to the doctor. I found myself punching the accelerator while weaving in and out of traffic, looking for tokens on the side of the road to collect. It’s a good thing I wasn’t pulled over for that little jaunt. I don’t know how I would’ve explained that to the police.

I may not know when to quit either. When it’s 3:00 in the morning, my limbs are numb, and I’m half-blind, instead of going to bed, I have a tendency to say in a maniacal voice, “Just one. more. level!”

Starting the same mission for the twentieth time because I keep getting shot sometimes makes me turn into a raving psycho a little frustrated. Yesterday, while I was playing, I got a little upset after dying a million times in a row.  I may have said something along the lines of, “Ohmygosh, I hate this stupid freaking stupid stupid game!”

Brooklyn stopped what she was doing and stared at me in horror looked at me.  “Mom, it’s just a game,” she said in that parental tone reserved for calming a child in the midst of a tantrum.

I’d like to say that I stopped what I was doing, realized how foolish I’d been acting, thanked Brooklyn, and calmed down.  However, I think I told her to shut up as my eyes glazed over and I gripped the controller even tighter.  I’m not sure though.  It’s all a giant blur.

This is why I don’t play.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Better than a Cheeto with a Mustache or Betty White on a Stick

Yesterday, my family spent a Christmas day that was very different. In this case, different is good. Sure, we were alone and didn’t have any family or friends with which to share the day. We didn’t go to anyone’s house and enjoy a nice meal with them. We didn’t have anyone over to our house to share our blessings with them. But, especially when I look back at last year, I’m so very thankful for our calm, quiet Christmas day.

Last year, we didn’t spend time with family either, but it wasn’t because we were living across the country from them; it was because we weren’t invited. Differences weren’t put aside for the holidays and my kids paid the price. Last year, Austin had been in the hospital for most of December and Jackson was still in the hospital.


I remember visiting him Christmas eve. I remember all too well his sadness at being stuck in the psychiatric hospital when all he wanted was to be home with everyone else, going to church, and getting ready for Christmas day. Because of the very strict safety regulations, I couldn’t even bring Jackson a present or cookies or anything. I remember how heartbroken I was and how hard it was to leave him all alone there and make myself walk out the door when visiting hours ended. I remember driving home that night, crying my heart out at how unfair everything was. I remember waking up Christmas morning and only having five of my kids get up to see what Santa had brought. And I remember how difficult it was to even do any holiday shopping what with my very limited funds, mounting medical bills, and several hours a day spent driving back and forth from the hospital multiple times for my boys. It sucked. It really, really sucked. It was about the lowest point I’ve ever experienced. My kids were hurting and I was entirely by myself, trying to hold it all together.

But this year, I had all six of my kids with me and, other than moments of homesickness which strike from time to time, they’re all healthy and doing well. Money may be tight, but God is providing and every time an unexpected bill comes along, a writing job that brings in the exact amount I need comes about. Yeah, we didn’t have family to spend the day with, but we were able to stay in our pajamas and hang out at home all day. We didn’t have to leave by any certain time and we didn’t have to eat on anyone else’s schedule. Instead, we were able to Skype with my family back home which was like being there without being there. We opened gifts from each other while on Skype so we could share the fun and the laughs. And, of course, it was 80-some degrees outside! Who could possibly feel sad when it’s so sunshiny and warm?

And to the mystery person who dropped off that huge stack of presents for us, thank you. I really can’t adequately express my gratitude for your generosity and thoughtfulness. The gifts you picked out suited each of us so well and the kids had such a great time opening all of them! I have pictures of the kids opening the packages on Facebook. It’s killing me not knowing who did this. I want to thank you and repay you so badly. But I do know and understand the power of giving and the awesome way it makes you feel. And in that way, I intend to repay my mystery santa by paying it forward. In the coming year, I feel a need to pay it forward on a very regular basis. In fact, I’ll be presenting you with a weekly challenge to pay it forward with me. I’ll give you suggestions and ideas and encourage you to join me so you too can experience the amazing feeling of giving to others for no particular reason.

CONTINUE READING HERE!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

I'm NOT Dreaming of a White Christmas!

Although I’ve been a little lot homesick recently, I’m really not dreaming of a white Christmas. I’ve never been a fan of cold and snow. I think it’s awesome being able to go outside in shorts. I love being able to jump in my car without warming it up for 10 minutes first. I love not having to scrape a foot of snow and ice off my car every time I want to go somewhere. And you can’t beat eating dinner outside on the screened-in porch.

I live in modern-day Mayberry. It may be 80 degrees. There may be palm trees. It may not feel like Christmas, but this little town sure knows how to decorate. Really, I’ve never seen a town quite so lit up. And the other day, Santa drove down our street, throwing out peppermints to the kids. How cool is that?


The following pictures will show why I’m not dreaming of a white Christmas. I’m perfectly happy here in the domain of the Heat Miser. Which is why we really don’t need snow. Really. Not even fake snow. We don’t need it. Ever. Again.

1.  The other night, Santa came to town on a firetruck. We stood outside in shorts, enjoying the warm evening with our neighbors while the kids grabbed the peppermints that Santa threw.

2.  We walked into town to see all the lights. We've never seen a town so lit up!

3.  This guy has been sitting in front of his house, waving to folks and handing out candy canes every night. We walked over and talked to him tonight. He's been doing this for five years.

4.  





CONTINUE READING HERE TO SEE PICTURES OF OUR FAKE SNOW EXTRAVAGANZA!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Top Ten Worst Gifts

I didn’t get my act together soon enough to come up with a Must Have Christmas Shopping List, but I still may be able to help you with your shopping. I can provide a What To Never Give For Christmas List. There are a couple more days until Christmas and it’s not too late to go back over your purchases and make sure that none of these are under the tree. Here, in no particular order, is my top ten list of the worst presents you can give or get.

Gym Membership
The present that says, “Merry Christmas! You’re fat.” Unless the recipient has specifically asked for a gym membership, you want to stay away from this kind of gift.

$5 Box of Crap

The only thing more lame than a $5 box of crap is a $10 box of crap. Or maybe it’s a $2 box of crap. I guess it depends on how you look at it. But I think we can all agree that it’s probably not a good idea to give anything with the word “crap” in the title. (image: prankplace.com)

Regifted Gifts

It’s not cool to regift a gift to the original giver of the gift. (Say that 5 times fast.) Don’t be a Tim Whatley with a Label Baby Junior!

Mustache-Shaped Eggs

Hmmm. For the Tom Selleck lover on your list? (image: stupid.com)

A Monkey

I know monkeys look cute and cuddly, but monkeys never make good gifts. Point in case - Curious George, Dexter, Marcel, King Kong, Mojo Jojo, The Flying Monkeys from the Wizard of Oz, and the scariest one of all, Boots from Dora the Explorer. (image: stupid.com)

Tiny Iron

First, I see no reason for ironing in the first place. But doing it with an iron the size of a hamster? Well, that’s just cruel and unusual (not to mention stupid) punishment. (image: stupid.com)

Pooping Moose Sweatshirt

Nothing says “Christmas cheer” like a sweater covered in feces. Other than my seven-year-old son, I can’t imagine anyone wanting this.

Twirling Fork

If you’re too lazy to physically move your fork, then you don’t need a plate of spaghetti; what you need is a slap. (image: stupid.com)

Underwear Hat

I don’t know what I like most about this product – the fact that it’s underwear you wear on your head, or the fact that the guy in the picture is all, “Excuse me while I take this important business call” while seemingly oblivious to the fact he has underwear on his head. (image: stupid.com)

Fake Snow

This is evil in a bag and I have a new level of hatred for my ex who sent this to my kids for Christmas. This is basically a bag full of those little gel pellets that are in disposable diapers. When you add water to a spoonful of this powder, it expands a million times into a huge pile of puffy, sticky gel that gets everywhere and never goes away. (image: stupid.com)

CONTINUE READING HERE!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Savor the Season

Growing up, my family always wrapped our Christmas presents in a very unique way. We'd spend more time wrapping the gift than we did shopping for it! Every year, my sister and I looked forward to seeing how our presents would be wrapped way before we even thought about what was in the package. I don't know if I can adequately explain how our presents were wrapped, so I'll show you.













I could only find pictures from one Christmas, but we came up with some really awesome creations year after year. Not only did we have fun thinking of ideas and wrapping the gifts, but unwrapping was a enjoyable, leisurely event. We admired each package and appreciated the time and effort that went into every one. Then we'd take turns, going around the room, slowly unwrapping each gift. It was a huge shock when my family would get together with my ex-inlaws because everyone ripped into their gifts at the same time like it was a race to finish. I never even knew who had gotten what from whom. It was a crazy free-for-all.

This is one tradition we're keeping - taking our time unwrapping our presents and appreciating the time and effort that went into each and every present. Read here about another family who has found a way to slow the unwrapping frenzy so they can savor each moment.

And take a minute to share your family's traditions on Subway's Fresh Takes on Family Time site for a chance to win a $50 gift card!

This website is a part of an incentivized online influencer network for Fresh Takes on Family Time Powered by Subway.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

There's no Place Like Home for the Holidays

Yesterday, I wrote a post describing my inner turmoil. I admitted to having self-doubts about this move to Florida. Although there are things I like about Florida and good reasons for moving here, there are also things I hate about Florida and reasons why I wonder if I should’ve stayed in Chicagoland. The post was about my self-doubt and homesickness. Period.

Some people took personal offense because I said that the healthcare and schools were worse down here. I’m sorry, but they are. No, I did not say that ALL schools in the south are worse than ALL schools in the north. Someone even suggested that perhaps I should have done my homework and checked out the schools before moving. Seriously? You seriously think I didn’t do that??? It was also brought up several times that I just had a poor attitude and if I was more open to change, things would be fine, but I’m unhappy because I’m choosing to be unhappy. If you know me at all, you know that I’m upbeat and positive 98% of the time. I look on the bright side and see the humor in most every situation. That said, I am human and just like everyone else in this world, I get down now and then. You could plant me just about anywhere and I could adjust, but the fact that my kids don’t like it here breaks my heart. That is what has me questioning every decision I’ve ever made. It was even said that if I wasn’t so negative, my kids would be happy here. Again, those are ludicrous assumptions. You have no idea how hard I work at countering every negative thing my kids say about this place with something positive.

Plus, I had to leave work two hours early yesterday, I got a speeding ticket, I had to wait at the orthopedist’s office for two hours, and I found out that Savannah needs a third surgery on her knee because she’s in constant pain every day. This all added to my feelings of sadness and frustration so I turned to my blog as an outlet.

I’m sorry to anyone I offended with my post yesterday. However, the post was not about you. It was simply about me missing the comfort and familiarity of home and me questioning if I’d made the right decision for my family.

And to everyone who said, “I used to like reading you, but now you’re too (insert word of choice)”, my suggestion to you is this – STOP READING ME! Although I love to entertain and make people laugh, sometimes things are just sucky. If I write a heartfelt post about the not-so-great parts of life, it’s because it’s what’s going on in my life right now. I know a lot of people are experiencing similar circumstances and I know it helps to know you’re not alone. If you don’t like that, don’t read my blog. Find your free entertainment elsewhere. Or maybe start your own blog and see how easy it is to come up with a funny post every day while strangers tell you what you’re doing wrong and how you should write.

And finally, to all my virtual friends and family who are tried and true, thank you for just being there! It means more than you can imagine! :)

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

Check out one blended family's obsession with Christmas trees. What started as a way to encompass the traditions of two separate families, turned into a house filled with as many as fourteen trees at once! But the best part of their story is how they get rid of their tree after Christmas. On Subway's Fresh Takes for Family site there's a story about this family along with many other stories and videos of fun, new family traditions. I especially like reading these stories right now because my own family is starting some of our own traditions. In fact, I briefly considered decorating a palm tree instead of an evergreen this year. Hey, when in Florida . . .

What do you guys do Christmas eve? Do you have any unusual traditions? Anything fun you've started doing with your kids. I admit we always do the same ole thing - go to church, leave out cookies and pop for Santa (Santa doesn't like milk in my house), then the kids stay awake forever because they're too excited to sleep and I stay up way too late wrapping presents that should've been wrapped weeks ago. Do you guys do anything fun? I'm in the market for some fun new ideas. And be sure to go over to the Fresh Takes site to share your ideas there! You'll be entered in a drawing for a Subway gift card and could even be chosen to have your story featured on their site!

This website is a part of an incentivized online influencer network for Fresh Takes on Family Time Powered by Subway.

Joe's Crab Shack Winner

The winner of the $50 gift card from Joe's Crab Shack (chosen randomly with Random Integer Generator) is . . .

#133

Nikki Alvarez said...
We have ever been but would love to try it out!! I follow you on facebook!!

Congratulations! Thank you to everyone who commented! And stay tuned for some more giveaways later this week.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

My Christmas Letter



Last night, I sat down to write a Christmas letter. I thought, especially since we live so far away from our family and friends now, it would be nice to update them. Did you know that writing a Christmas letter is a lot harder than you might think?

Dear family and friends,

The Meehan family has experienced many changes during 2011. The biggest change was our move from Chicagoland to Orlando, Florida. I felt like I needed to uproot my kids and move some place cheaper after their deadbeat dad decided he no longer needed to hold a job. I tore the kids away from everything and everyone they know and love and moved across the country to a place where I could get a job with insurance. After the boys were hospitalized last winter, we felt like we needed to move. We moved because of the weather.

I have a job working with kids who make me want to bang my head against the wall. I go to work every day and come home to kids making messes when I’d much rather stay home, write, and take care of my kids and house. I work at a school down here.

Austin hates Florida and claims that everyone in the state is illiterate. After being without dental insurance for so long, Austin went to the dentist and found out he has fourteen cavities. Austin likes to play video games.

Savannah has an appointment with an orthopedic doctor this week because she still has constant knee pain. Savannah has started driving and she hasn’t had an accident yet. Savannah’s on the swim team.

Jackson is somehow managing to fail band. This summer, Jackson spent a night in the hospital because he thinks he’s Tony Hawk and he flipped off his bike. He hasn’t cleaned his disgustingly, slimy turtle’s tank in months. Jackson likes skateboarding.

Lexi doesn’t like her new school and she misses her friends from back home. Lexi is starting to adjust to Florida.

Clayton is still a spaz and he proved it by jumping off the bunk beds, splitting open his face, and getting stitches. Clay is energetic.

Brooklyn has expanded her personal menu and now eats seven different foods. She makes amazingly huge messes every day. I can’t believe how fast Brooklyn is growing up.

I finished the letter and read the few lines that weren’t crossed out. I looked up. I looked back down at my pathetic excuse for a letter. I crumpled it up and tossed it toward the garbage can. Then I took out a new sheet of paper and scribbled, “Merry Christmas” across the top.


And this is why I don’t write a Christmas letter.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Eat at Joe's

Recently, Joe’s Crab Shack offered me some gift cards to try out their new kids’ menu. Joe’s Live Well entrees offer healthy alternatives to typical restaurant kids’ meals, including grilled shrimp and crab legs with sides like celery sticks, rice, and corn-on-the-cob. Of course, they also have mac-n-cheese and pizza for those of us who have picky eaters (not naming any names, Brooklyn). You can check out their menus HERE. My kids are huge shrimp lovers so they loved their meals. I ordered pastalaya which has approximately a million calories, but it was so good! And it was huge, so I took half of it home and enjoyed it for lunch the next day.

The atmosphere at Joe’s is fun and friendly. It’s definitely a family restaurant. The one we visited, even had a play area outside for the little kids to explore while the rest of us finished our meals. They played bouncy 80s music, and it wasn't uncommon to see the waiters break out their dance moves throughout the evening.

As with any seafood restaurant, it’s on the pricey side so it’s not a place my family would frequent regularly, however it is a fun place at which to celebrate special occasions. Speaking of pricey, Joe’s Crab Shack is going to help out one family with that. I have a $50 gift card to give away to one lucky reader so you can check out their new kids’ menu yourself. And you’ve got to try their steampots! Huge pots packed full of deliciousness including different combinations of crab legs, scallops, mussels, clams, andouille sausage, corn-on-the-cob with your favorite seasonings. Check them out HERE! Yum-o!

Leave me a comment here, including a way to contact you, and I’ll choose a random winner on Monday, December 12. Good luck!

Contest open to U.S residents, age 18 and older.
Duplicate comments will be deleted.
Random winner will be selected on Monday, 12/12/11 and will be notifying shortly thereafter.
Winner will receive one $50 gift card for Joe’s Crab Shack. Find a location HERE.

I was given gift cards so that I could try out Joe’s Crab Shack myself.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Boob Jobs and Bad Hair Days

I leave my van outside on the driveway every day. It’s not that I don’t have room in the garage, or that the garage is too messy (although that status changes daily) for me to pull in. It’s that I don’t have a remote garage door opener. I bought one from Sears and programmed it, but learned that the sensors are misaligned or something. Look at me being all technical. I really have no freaking clue what’s wrong with it. I don’t even know if it has sensors! I just make stuff up so I seem smart. I suppose admitting that I make stuff up to sound smart isn’t all that smart though. Hmmm.

Anyway, none of that really has anything to do with this blog post anyway.  All you need to know is that I park my van outside and in the morning, it’s covered in condensation. As I drop my littles off at school, I have the wipers going, trying to clear the windshield, and I have the windows open so I can see out (and so I can cool off because I’m undoubtedly overheated from running around and drinking large amounts of coffee). After I drop the littles off at their school, I roll up my windows and head to my school.

Only today, my window got stuck. I couldn’t get it to go up. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t care. I drive with my windows open most of the time. I love, love, love feeling the breeze through my hair. However, when my hair is wet and I’m on my way to work, I generally keep the windows shut to avoid the Roseanne Roseannadanna factor. 

I could feel my hair whipping around and, deathly afraid of walking into school with Donald Trump hair, kept pounding the button to raise my window. But it didn’t budge. I stopped at a red light and frantically tried to smooth my hair down when the DJ on the radio announced that they were giving away boob jobs for Christmas.  Wha…??? Here I am at a stop light listening with fascination to these people talk about wanting boob jobs for Christmas like it was no different than wanting an iPod or a sweater when I glance over at the car next to me. The passengers were looking at me in horror and I wasn’t sure if it was because of my coiffure or the fact that the phrase boob job was loudly bursting from my radio every few seconds.

I wanted to close the window and continue to listen with morbid curiosity, but since the window still wouldn’t move, I opted to change the station lest look like a freak to other motorists. For the rest of my commute, I listened to Bing dream of a white Christmas while the warm Florida air, uh, styled my hair.

When I arrived at work and walked into the office, the secretary smirked.  “I didn’t know Flock of Seagulls was making a comeback.”

I stopped, turned, and looked at her, eyebrow raised. “Just for that, I’m not getting you a boob job for Christmas.”

I love that secretary.

Monday, December 5, 2011

You Might be a Blogger If . . .

Recently, I wrote a post about things that set moms apart from the rest of the world. The other day, while sitting in the teacher’s lounge, I commented that I wished I had my good camera so I could take a picture of my lunch. The teachers looked at me like I’d been sniffing dry erase markers. It hit me then that bloggers think a little differently than non-bloggers and I came up with a list of things that set bloggers apart from the rest.

Here, in no particular order, is my top ten list of clues that you might just be a blogger.


1.  You take mutliple pictures of your food before taking a bite. Sometimes, you take pictures of every step of the food preparation as well.

2.  When your kids paint themselves and every conceivable surface in the house with Desitin, or color their faces with magic marker, you don't freak out, yell, or start cleaning. You go for your camera.

3.  You're frequently writing blog posts in your head and/or writing little notes to yourself on your iPhone about future posts.

4.  You're an expert at getting your point across in 140 characters or less and think there should be some sort of social media award for having the ability to shorten a 362 character thought into 140 letters.

5.  You have something of an addiction and can't be without access to the internet for more than a couple minutes. I mean, what if someone comments on your amazingly witty Facebook post? This is information you need to know immediately! In addition, you'll fight any person (and win) for a coveted outlet in any given airport.

6.  You get a dozen PR pitches a day and 9 out of 10 are from clueless people who think you'll work for free/for a coupon/for a chance to win a gift card/for the honor of reading their stupid press release.

7.  You know what html is and you can use it to do fun things like cross out words you've written create profound blog posts.

8.  You have more online friends than real friends.

9.  When you go to blogging events, people address you not by your name, but by your blog name or twitter handle. "Oh, hey there, mom2my6pack!" "Oh my gosh, it's Because I Said So! I'm so happy to meet you!"

10.  You have a hard time adjusting from the online world where you're famous, to the real world where you're just an ordinary mom. Sometimes you expect people to roll out a red carpet for you when you walk down the street, and you get a little ticked off when people don't cater to your every whim. I mean, don't they know who you are online?

Now, it’s your turn, my brilliant blogger friends. What sets you apart from the rest?

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Sunday Sound Out

From Orlando, where crazy, mixed-up people order soda instead of pop, it's your host, the woman who is 100% biodegradable, Dawn Damalas Meehan. Tonight, my special guest star is Johnny Depp.



(This isn't really Johnny Depp. I asked Johnny Depp to be on my blog post, but he said no. I wish him well. Although, this isn't Captain Jack Sparrow, it does look like he has a little captain in him. Let's just go with it.)

And now, here are the answers to your questions. Have a question you want answered? Email me at mom2my6pack@aol.com!


Still going to miss Chicago this winter?
I miss the pizza. I do not miss the weather. I'm sitting outside in shorts as I write this. Why on earth would I miss freezing cold and snow when I have this???

I did a cross country move this past summer too, moving from Maryland to Texas (minus kids, just the other half and two cats). I remember you mentioning lauguage issues. Has there been any word that has really stumped you? I still can't get use to them call grocery bags, sacks. Everytime they ask me if I need another sack or do I need them to sack my groceries for me, I swear I must look at them like they have two heads while it takes 5 or more seconds to realize sack = bag.
It annoys me when people say "soda". Soda is the clear, flavorless, carbonated stuff you add to scotch. Coke, Sprite, and Dr. Pepper are all POP! The kids in my classes say "dress out" instead of "change" for gym class. They also call their "backpacks" book bags. Weird.

How/When can we mere rednecks from Mississippi lure you here to speak??? Please message me w/ your marketing/promo info...as you know, I'm one of your most loyal stalkers...er...fans. Fan, I said! NOT stalker, I promise!!! :) In all seriousness, please send me your media info. and such....Thanx!
Sorry, I only speak at events where there are stalkers.
Actually, I have some information up on my website, but will adding a new section with press and speaking info. Check back! :)

OMG~ you're blog header was just on ABC's Nightline! Yea you!!!
I never tire of seeing stuff about me on TV, in magazines, or in the newspaper. And it's still the most awesome thing to see my books on the shelves of stores! It helps feed my delusions of grandeur.

Has the X contacted the kids?
Yeah, he calls now and then. The three youngest kids talk to him sometimes. They talk to my friend, Eric, more often.

Have you made friends in the neighborhood? Are people nice? And have the kids made new friends?
The neighbors all think I'm "that weird mom with all the kids who screams at her kids to go to bed every night". There's a nice family across the street from us. The dad edged my lawn when we first moved in and he's fixed the boys' bikes too. The mom drives Jackson to school some days. Their boys are great kids and I'm glad my kids are friends with them.
I've gotten to know some of the teachers at my school. They go out for drinks on Fridays sometimes. This past Friday, I expressed an interest in joining them, but (coincidentally?) they didn't go out that night. Hmmmm . . . I'm sure it had nothing to do with me saying I wanted to take pictures of my food.

So have you met any special guys yet? Are you ready to date?
When and where am I supposed to meet people? Men are not exactly lined up around the corner to meet an old, fat woman who has 6 kids and issues with slow-drivers, and open-mouth chewers, and people who say "soda", and people who are missing multiple teeth, and stupid people . . .

When's your next book coming out?
Was this written by my agent? Ugh, I would love, really love, to write another book. But I hardly have the time and energy to write a blog post these days. I'm planning to write another book this summer while I'm off work, however. In the meantime, you can buy my books (softcover and Kindle) here. They make great Christmas presents too!

Connect with Dawn on Facebook because she's far too lazy to update her blog every day.

Have a great week, everyone!