My kids and I were invited to a media event at Legoland tonight. (It was a very cool place and we had a blast, but I'll write more about that later.) At one point, in the evening, there was a competition for anyone who wanted to participate. The goal was to build something from outer space with Legos. Jackson built a little green alien on a Mars rover. He won the competition and was awarded a Star Wars Lego set.
A little later, Jackson and I were hanging out, eating a piece of cake, when he off-handedly mentioned that he'd given his prize to a little boy who was crying. I looked at him and my heart swelled. My eyes filled with tears. Jackson is my kid who has precious little self-control. He's oftentimes belligerent and nasty. He inflicts his rotten moods on everyone around. He's put holes in his walls and floor. He's broken windows and doors. He has a horrible temper. I'm not saying this because he's a bad kid because he isn't. But the ADHD, temper, and impulsivity make it really hard to see the good sometimes.
Yet, paradoxically, he has the kindest, most compassionate heart. He loves to help other people and has real empathy for those who are suffering in any way. He didn't think that giving that little boy the building set was a big deal. He told me that the boy had been building a spaceship was really upset that he didn't win and he started crying. When Jackson saw how sad this little boy was, he handed him the prize he'd just won.
I told Jackson how very proud I was of him. And in that instant, I could see the kid that Jackson really is. Not the one who lacks self-control when his meds wear off. There wasn't a trace of Mr. Hyde in the kid hanging out with me, eating cake tonight.
One of the women who works at Legoland came by right then and asked, "Are you the one who gave that little boy your prize?" Jackson told her he had. She thanked him and told him he was a great kid. Then she went off and returned with an even cooler building set for Jackson!
It's time like these, when our kids surprise us with these amazing acts, that we know we're doing something right; that somehow, something is sinking in. That there's hope they'll turn out to be compassionate, well-adjusted, productive members of society.
I’m proud of you, Jax!
That's just beautiful. You have wonderful kids Dawn :). Made me all teary!
ReplyDeleteYou have much reason to be proud.
ReplyDeleteWay to go Jackson! And way to go Dawn. You are raising a great group of kids. :)
ReplyDeleteI saw your post on facebook last night and didn't get a chance to respond. What a wonderful thing for Jackson to do, be sure to tell him that there are lots of readers that are so proud of him!
ReplyDeleteI loved this post! I also have a son who sometimes is very selfish and has a bad attitude towards everyone and everything and it does make it hard to see the good in him sometimes. It brought tears to my eyes to read this post. Great job to you and to all parents who think they aren't making a difference in their kids lives. Sometimes they sneak in and surprise us.
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome!! Way to go Jackson!! SOmetimes these kids do amaze us.
ReplyDeletewhat a wonderful moment for both of you to share. I'm glad he got noticed for it too!
ReplyDeleteAwwww! That is just awesome. And it's great that the lady rewarded him for his generosity. You are raising good kids and there's the proof!
ReplyDeleteThe ability to sacrifice without thinking about reward is one of the most precious gifts there is. Well done Jackson!
ReplyDeleteThe ability to instill such thoughtfulness in your children is another precious gift. Well done, Dawn!
Thank you so much for sharing this story. As a mom to a 7 year old with ADHD and ODD I too often am struggling to see the good. I'm so so happy that you were able to see the real him in this instance and I'm sure there will be many more.
ReplyDeleteSeriously sweet.
ReplyDeleteWhat a heartwarming story, and what a great kid! The story made me cry. Thanks for sharing it. You've told us other stories before of his kindness to his little sister (I know, probably hard to remember sometimes). A kid with that much empathy and generosity is destined to something very good for the world.
ReplyDeleteOk - even I'm crying!!! My son also has some anger issues, and this gives me some hope!!!
ReplyDeleteVery sweet of him--and he has learned kindness and thoughtfulness from his mother! Seriously, it is in large part due to your parenting skills in my opinion, because you are a great mom! :)
ReplyDeleteAwesome story. I like.
ReplyDeleteDawn, that is so wonderful. I know you are so proud of Jackson and I am glad that God blessed his giving by giving him ever a better prize! He will remember that forever. You are a great mom and doing a wonderful job raising your children. God Bless you and your family.
ReplyDeleteKids amaze me over and over. I hope that I can raise my son to be as caring and thoughtful as yours are.
ReplyDeleteAwesome Jackson! Well done mom! What a beautiful evening to share with a great kid :)
ReplyDeleteYou got me crying on that one. I have a son like that. He has always been the pot-stirrer and can change the mood in any room. But when it comes down to it, he has a heart bigger than any of ours.
ReplyDeleteWay to go Jax! And way to go Mom!
I had a similar experience with my son recently when he acted very kindly, and I almost had tears in my eyes. Between the craziness of juggling a job, a new born and a husband who works around 100 hours a week, I often wonder about everything I let slide with my son and worry about how it's hurting his growing up. And then he does some absolutely wonderful things like this, and it makes me think that kids, as they are, are really wonderful little people, and as parents we just need to love them rather than "teach" them things.
ReplyDeleteThough I must say that there are times when I lose my top; and then I make myself think about you - if you can handle 6 six kids alone and yet be so calm and collected, I should be able to manage two without acting like a headless chicken :)
Okay, I know this has nothing to do with your beautiful post...BUT. I just watched your Stay At Home Moms Are Never Home video and did you know you sound almost exactly like Kirstie Alley?
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome thing to do!!
ReplyDeleteWow, what a sweetheart. It really is pretty amazing to see your kids be who you know they can be :)
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome Dawn! My daughter is very volatile, and emotional and it's easy to get fed up with the negative and the outbursts, but just like your story about Jackson, there are times she knocks me over with her empathy and compassion. Some day, these things will balance. I hope. :)
ReplyDeleteway to go jackson!
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of Jax too! Brings tears to my eyes.
ReplyDeleteThat makes me smile. Jackson sounds very much like my son Bryan, who also has ADHD and your explanation of Jackson fits Bryan to a T. When he does things like that my heart swells also.
ReplyDeleteWay to go Jackson!
Kim in VA
Way to go Jackson :)
ReplyDeleteAn awesome kid from an awesome Mom.Gave me a good eye washing,thanks. And yes you do sound like Kirstie Alley but only 1/2 the size ;~)
ReplyDeleteI loved your story Dawn, I have been reading your blog for a while and tend be be areader but not a commentor, I just has to say how much this touched me. I can also relate so much as my daughter is ADHD also,along with some mood disorder issues. She can and has, done many of the same negative things you listed, but also has the sweetest heart and funniest sense of humor and best personality. I too hold out hope that she will be a well-adjusted productive member of society. thank you for sharing your heart-warming story, Jackson is an awesome young man, and you are a wonderful mommy!
ReplyDeleteDawn thank you so much for this post. I've been overwhelmed lately with my 14 year old and all the things I have to teach him as a parent: don't fail math, don't do drugs, stay out of trouble, don't get arrested, do your homework, keep your pants on, don't be a jerk...I realized last night we just have to take it day by day and minute by minute and trust that all our lessons will meld into a whole, productive, wonderful man sometime in the future.
ReplyDeletewtg jackson!
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome! And what a greater blessing for Jackson.
ReplyDeleteDespite the goofy kid stuff (which makes reading your blog so amusing)- you have great kids.
As the mom of an ADHD Dr Jekyel/Mr Hyde kid I TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. Your description brought tears to my eyes as well. I belong to addforums.com and have gotten a lot of really great advice and support from the people there. Sometimes it's just nice to know you're not the only one out there.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing such an amazing job with all 6 kids and I'm glad you got that little glimpse of the person that you've worked so hard to raise.
wow...sweet boy. great mother - he's learned it from you.
ReplyDeleteAnd that is why we live through all we do as moms, for those moments just like that one. I have to say when I saw the picture at the top I thought it was a huge stack of those wipes boxes....silly me.
ReplyDelete