Thursday, September 27, 2007

Someone Just HAD to do the Math Problem!

I was going to write something tonight, but after staring at a blank screen for like four and a half hours, I decided to go have some chocolate chip cookies instead. Writing/eating cookies - practically the same thing.

To the people who answered the math problem last night - what's wrong with you?! Seriously. That's just wrong. And sad. And I got that problem or formula or eye-bleeding string of numbers and letters, or whatever it was from online. I typed in "math problems" and it popped up.

To the person who asked me for a meatloaf recipe - seriously? You want a meatloaf recipe from me? I'm not Paula Dean. Or Rachel Ray. Or basically anyone who makes meatloaf. I am wondering, however, what on earth mince is. Oh yes, and you'll appreciate this, when saying goodnight to my son this evening, he responded with, "Goodnight ole chap. Pip pip cheerio." Apparently he's British now.

I didn't mean to mislead anyone about the donations to St. Jude's. When I said that even a dollar makes a difference, I didn't realize there was a $10 minimum. I apologize. And I want to thank all the people who donated! You're awesome!

Thanks to all the people who said, "You might want to double check and make sure the hermit crab is actually dead before you bury him." That is, thank you for making me feel guilty that I may have inadvertently suffocated a poor molting hermit crab. Actually, I'm quite certain that he was indeed dead. I think.

Ok, I need to get back to writing my chapter on sick kids. Speaking of, I took my middle daughter to the doctor today because she's been home sick with a fever all week. Why is it, that after six kids, I still don't know when to take my kids to the doctor? I'll bring them in and inevitably they'll get the diagnosis of "Snotty Nose". I'm told, " Take them home, give them juice and they'll be fine in another day. That'll be $20.00." Of course they're fine in another day and I kick myself for not waiting "just one more day". On the other hand, if I wait that "one more day" before bringing them to the doctor, I'll get there and the doctor will look at me and say I'm the most neglectful mom on the planet and how could I have waited so long to bring my child in and their ears are infected and they have strep throat and their tongues are green and spotted, and they have some rash on their hair and their toes are swollen five times their usual size and how could I have not noticed that their skin was an interesting shade of chartreuse. I just can't win. So Lexi got the Snotty Nose diagnosis today.

Now I'm going back to writing. As soon as I put my baby down, that is. It's quite the fun-filled challenge trying to type when you're holding a baby who has just put their foot up your nose. Trust me. Have a good night!

118 comments:

  1. Even though you got the snotty nose DX. I've waited a few times too long, and it ended up involving ambulances and hospital stays. So just keep reminded yourself of that, when you get the snotty nose DX, that at least your not in the ambulance with the DD that you let get WAY TO SICK. That you realized as you were driving her to the clinic, that uh I think something really bad is happening, and that as you walked into the clinic with her, the receptionist, SCREAMS for a nurse.

    I'd take 2000 snotty nose dx over one of those.

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  2. Ok, just as you did a search for the math problem, someone typed in 'answer this math problem'...lol! Completely agree with you about the whole "take'em/don't take'em" to the dr. ordeal, grrrr.

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  3. I totally feel you when it comes to not knowing when to take the kids in to the doctor. I always feel one way or another...never like I came just in time or at the right time.

    Most of the time I just end up feeling silly because the waiting room at my doctor's office seems to be the miracle cure for all child ailments. Cough, stuffy nose, blue spots? Walk into the waiting room and be instantly cured so that mom looks like a total dingbat alarmist!

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  4. Dawn,

    When kids get sick, you never win no matter when you take them to the Doctor same as you never win when you go to the Doctor lol. If someone really did that math problem, they either have too much time on their hands or something. They didn't need to post the answer. Thanks for all the laughs. Reminds me I don't really need to strangle my 3 at all most days. As for the crab, you son will be a better person for it and don't feel guilty. If it was not dead your son might have stood watching it until it moved. If it was dead, it was going to start stinking from what I have read so maybe you won on that one. Your a great Mom all the way around!! Hugs. Lori, Oklahoma City, OK

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  5. Wow, first commenter? I really enjoy reading your blog. I know you get that a lot. I have five and not sure I have gotten the foot up the nose yet (or maybe I have just forgotten), spit up on both shoulders and down the inside front of my shirt, definitely!

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  6. Hi Dawn:

    Interesting how you can learn Calculus from a very busy Mom. I looked up the solution to your math problem, and your readers were right on the dot.

    It was centuries ago that I went to a Calculus class.

    Thank you Mrs. Einstein. (:-)

    Regards,

    Omar.-

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  7. You've gotta be kiddin' me! NOBODY'S posted yet today? I haven't posted before because I figured it would just get buried anyway. I'm a mom of 6, too and now starts the REAL fun, I'm a grams of one with another on the way!
    And the drs?! BTDT!!!!!!!! With every single one of the kids! So no, there's no hope that it will get any better.
    So betting hit the post button quick so I'll still be number one today!

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  8. HI! I'm a lurker... my kids call me Damama and I actually created an account here just so I could leave you comments, but... alas CRS kicked in and I can't remember the name or the password I used so I'll just go anon for now.. :o) <= you wink, I have a nose.. LOL.. can't wait till that whoever sees this one! It'll really give 'em something to be confused about! LOL!! ANYWAY The whole reason I jumped in tonight was to tell you that I saw an old movie last night that I've seen a dozen times before, but because of YOU, last night I was roaring! My hubby and daughter thought I'd lost my mind! If you have a chance.. ha ha ha ha! ... jump on netflix and play/rent "Please Don't Eat The Daisies" with Doris Day. You are a legend BEFORE you time! Peace and blessings!!

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  9. Just curious.....what was the answer to the math question? I am not into math... at all... but since you mentioned somone solved it, im curious of the answer. Also want to say thank you for writing all this, I read it every night before bed. Its quite entertaining, even tho I am not a mom, nor am I female, but i still enjoy it nontheless. Thanks!

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  10. We Mums can't win Dawn it comes in the contract......I remember when I was little, 30 miles form the doctor , 30 miles from the nearest anything, I wasn't well my dad took me to the doctor he took my temp and it was 102° and the doc said "This girl should be home in bed! " Well, duh! I was sick, doctors didn't do housecalls 30 miles along back roads in the back of nowhere what was Dad expected to do? Turned out I had the measles, just didn't have the spots yet

    Hope daughter is feeling better....now get back to your writing you know we can't wait for the book!!!

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  11. There were no comments (when I started this comment) so I HAD to post. LOL! Anyway, I read your blog constantly since the infamous pokemon cards and you always make me smile.

    I only have 2 little ones but with hubs away (Army) sometimes it feels like I have a circus! :)

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  12. I read the bit about your son saying goodnight and almost lost control of my bodily functions :)

    Ah, good stuff.

    Anyway, for what it's worth, i think pediatricians may sometimes have fun just messing with you. They enjoy being contrary. Whatever they think will really annoy you, they'll say. I am convinced there are secret regional meetings where between guffaws they trade stories with punchlines that always begin with, "And THEN I told them..."

    I think I'd end up the same way if I had to deal with dozens of sick children and worried parents all day, every day.

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  13. Hi Dawn
    Mince is 'Minced Beef' - English people just call it mince, whereas you call it beef I think.
    Someone called Sheree from Nebraska (thank her cotton socks) saw my cry for help and sent me her recipe instead, so now I have one to try, and it's still thanks to you.. So thanks!! I think your blog is more of a forum than you realise!! I did Laugh Out Loud at little'uns toodle-pip remark - so sweet. International recognition, what else could anyone ask for?
    Good luck and keep on blogging!

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  14. Ah, mince LOL
    Mince is the English word for "ground meat", typically used to mean ground beef.
    A bit like we say "mash" to mean mashed potatoes. =)
    Mince n' mash with gravy - simply delicious.

    I think the term you wanted was English, not British LOL
    Britain, or rather Great Britain, encompasses England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales.
    At least you didn't call us "European" LMAO

    So pray do tell what the heck is "chartreuse"?

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  15. Okay, I clearly watch too much kid-marketed TV, because I have to wonder if your "pip pip cheerio" son watches The Backyardigans on Nickelodeon? There's an episode where they all have a tea party, and Tasha tells them they have to say "pip pip cheerio." Just a thought on that kid randomness...

    Oh, and BTW, I'm delurking for the first time - Love your blog!

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  16. I had an incident that made me think of you yesterday. One of the other kindergarten classes was at the hallway bathrooms. As we pass by, I hear a teacher exclaim to a boy, "Did you just lick the door?!"

    I just about bust out laughing right then and there, both from the gross-out factor of all those germs and from the sheer mischief in the boy's eyes.

    It was just one of those things I thought I'd never hear.

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  17. Mince is minced meat, usually beef - what you would call ground beef I think. It is also pretty much Scotland's national dish - mince and tatties (mashed potatoes). Don't believe anyone who says our national dish is haggis - for every plate of haggis consumed here in Scotland, there will be a thousand plates of mince n' tatties. I'm so glad to know that I could do nothing with your maths problem but could help out on meat products!

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  18. Don't feel bad...my kids don't complain and people say oh how wonderful! NO not wonderful! I never know when they are sick until they are at deaths door and then I get the horrible parent look when I do take them in to the Dr because they have strep and ruptured eardrums. Yes, this has happened on more than one occasion I must confess. I just want to tell the DR that hey they were just running around and wacking trees with sticks not 10 minutes ago(yes, that's a great passtime here for some reason) does that sound sick to you?!

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  19. Trust me, when I say that no matter when I visit your blog, which I have to confess hasn't been in a while!!!! you absolutely and totally crack me up, I am sat here nearly crying with laughter at the picture of a childs foot up your nose, lol, oh soooo funny - thanks for making me laugh this very yukky british typical day!!

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  20. Don't make me wake my kids!!

    It's horribly early in the morning and I shouldn't even be awake yet, but I am, and almost spitting coffee on my laptop. I normally can just chuckle quietly to myself when reading funny things online... but I blurted out a lovely, delicate (hyena-ish, snorting) laugh when you mentioned how hard it is to type with a foot up your nose.
    Aaaaah, the memories. Motherhood ain't for sissies, my mom says. She's right. Nor does it suit the small-nostriled.

    Thanks for keeping me laughing... I'll make note to not read your blog until the kids are up. :-)

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  21. Dawn -

    your blog is awesome... and if it is any comfort many of your stories remind me of my childhood - there were 4 of us and we kids had a great time, as an adult I sometimes feel sorry for our poor mother when we start talking about some of the things we pulled!

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  22. It's one of THOSE days.
    Now I want cookies.

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  23. Well, the crab's dead now, that's for sure.

    I hate going to the doctor. I always have to figure whether what the kid has is worse than what he might pick up in the doctor's waiting room. So, I rarely go. Once I brought my then-4-year-old son in, for what I thought was the worst case of pinkeye I had ever seen. I mean, he was just lying there on the couch, limp, with his face all swollen beneath his eyes. Turns out he had pneumonia. (He was one of those rare non-complaining children.)

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  24. I'm with you on the Dr. issue, I go and there's nothing wrong, or I go and I should have come 3 days ago because now the strep throat has turned into Scarlet Fever! Gah! At least here in Canada it costs me nothing but a few minutes of my time to find out that "she has a cold..."

    You know that you can NEVER tell the kids what you now know about the possibility of the crab being undead. Ok, maybe when the youngest is 30 or so...

    Marie
    :0)

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  25. I'm with you on the doctor thing. We've got 4 kids and I always misjudge. My daughter had bronchitis several months once and I thought it was "just a cough." I missed Mom of the Year on that one.

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  26. Thank you again for another refreshingly funny and real look at the lives us moms all lead. You are just funny enough to get it out into words. And you make it look/read so interesting!

    I have some great recipes for Meatloaf - if you are interested, maybe I'll post one next week on my blog. :) :)

    Good luck with your book - I'll be in line to buy it and I've already started publicizing it for you in my neck of the woods!

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  27. So let me just be the first to say today, I just love you!!!! you are too funny. I'm the same way with my kids. I can't win when it comes to the doctor you know. I don't think they will ever look at me and go WOW you've got to be the mother with the best instincts! How did you know that was going to turn into that! HA even if I did the doctor really doesn't care much what I have to say. Well like so many others I can't wait to read your book! but no preasure! I will wait! thanks for the daily smiles! Melissa

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  28. Whew! I am so relieved to know that I'm not the only one that gets those looks from the doctor! I wonder if there is a special class they take in medical school to perfect those "looks." Thanks for the blog and the daily laughs! God Bless!

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  29. Mince = Mince meat = ground chuck! ;)

    Signed
    Some weird British woman in Cincinnati

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  30. This is the first time I've been able to leave a post and now I can't think of what I wanted to say. Keep on writing. Your posts are great comedy relief. My brother-in-law was taken off life support yesterday and died a few minutes later so it is good to be able to come here, find some great writings and humor. Thank you.

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  31. Just wanted to say that I truly enjoy your blog. I read it every morning before I start my day at work and it really sets me off on the right foot. Keep it up and good luck to you - I only have one child and find that more than enough to keep me busy! By the way Mince is what we call ground beef in England :)

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  32. I had to laugh at your comment about 'making sure the crab is dead' because I've BTDT! My son's beloved frog, Tad, whom we raised from a tadpole (his frog sister's name was Pole', pronounced Polly, get it? Tad and Polly? but I digress) Anyway, TAD met his demise one Wednesday night after church and my son cried his eyes out. We placed the little guy in a small cardboard jewelry box and buried him in the yard. The next day someone told me, "Frogs hibernate - make sure he's dead!" and of course, I KNOW at this point that if he wasn't before, he is NOW thankyouverymuch. But like you, I'm pretty sure he wasn't faking that all legs spread out out stiffness and floating maneuvers he was doing when we found him. I'm sorry about your son's crab - I understand the tears that flow when pets die, even pets you can't touch or pet. I hope his heart mends quickly!

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  33. OMG!! Finally a kindred spirit! My mother sent me an article about you that was in the paper in Memphis (I now live in Oakley, IL) and I just HAD to check you out. I started my blog a few years ago and got the same type of respose from friends and family but work slowed me down and I haven't been posting as often lately. You have inspired me to get my tail in gear and get back at it. I would love for you to check out my site - although I only have 3 children (all girls) it seems we share some of the same experiences. Read the early work (like you have time), it's the best. Now that I live in the middle of a corn field, I hope to have more to contribute to the online world. Hope to hear from you and keep up the wonderful work!!

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  34. We live by the "wait at least 24 hrs" rule and in some cases where the symptoms are intermittent over time we see how many times the same complaint surfaces.

    BTW, did you know your BuddyMap has 3302 people on it? Now calculate the cost of your book by 3302 for minimum number of sales then multiply that by your royalty percentage for a minimum royalty received (I'm guessing that's how it works ... forgive me if I'm wrong). How's that for a math problem for you?

    Do you read all these comments? Do you ever not publish a comment sent? Just wondering.

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  35. I'm glad you have a sense of humor even with sick kids....but then you do still have chocolate.

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  36. I'm a former math major/teacher... I wanted to do the math problem... I really did. But now I'm a stay at home mom with four kiddos, three still in diapers and the other being homeschooled... so all I had the time and brainpower for was to look at it and say "That's calculus... I remember when I could do calculus... back to the diapering rounds!" :)

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  37. Oh, honey, I so hear you on the doctor comments! And I'm a single mom, too, so when I waited too long I got the (actual or implied) lecture that I was neglecting my children for my "career."

    (I really did get that actual lecture from a pediatrician once, because the babysitter took one of them in for the re-check from an ear infection, you know, where they say, "Yep, everything is fine, that will be another $20 please?" Um, hello? If I don't work, they don't eat...that ain't neglect.)

    But I digress, as usual; like you, I generally took them in the day before they got well, and felt like an overprotective fool. Now that they are teenagers, I assume everything is an attempt to ditch school unless there are bones poking through the skin or a fever of 103.

    Thanks for your wonderful blog, by the way; it brightens my day!

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  38. Ain't it the truth. We could have saved close to $1000 if we just waited out an illness by a day. Instead, we go on as a concerned wife-mother-husband-dad and a series of tests are drawn up, xrays, scans, and the next day, all better, that $547 please! Ugh! Trust your instincts!

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  39. OMG!! I so sympathize with you about the 'one more day' with the sick children. I had the exact same dilema this week! My daughter has been sick since last Thursday w/a fever and cough. I finally decided to take her to the doctor after missing 2 days of school/work only to be told that 'she just has a bad cough'- well DUH!! I knew that already! I got a prescription and was sent on our way....the only thing good about the trip is that they, for some unknown reason, didnt want my co-pay. Thats ok, I made it up on the cough syrup.
    Good Luck to you and your crazy bunch. I hope that your sicky gets better soon, too!! We'll keep you in our "anti-sick kid" thoughts :)

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  40. I am laughing at the "doctor bit" right now....my thoughts exactly!!!!

    I enjoy reading your blog.....keep it coming!

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  41. Mince is the Australian word for ground beef. Might even be the British word for it, but I'm not sure about that.

    I have the same problem with knowing when to go to the Dr's! Even with myself!

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  42. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

    I apologize in case somebody has already sent it - I hope it will make you smile.
    Enjoy your writing :-)

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  43. hilarious Mom song on You Tube

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

    enjoy!

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  44. I HATE taking my kids to the dr. for the same reason. Unless you can no longer walk, there is blood coming from somewhere that can't be stopped, or I see a bone no longer contained by skin... you're fine. Go lay down.

    I love your blog. It's the first thing I do in the morning when I get to work. Can't wait for the book!

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  45. When you take the kiddos in for a check up and get the snotty nose diagnosis be sure you can/will bring them in next week for something they caught while in the waiting room. I swear my kids all chew, suck, lick or generally slobber all over something while we are there and catch something 10 times worse than we initially went in for. :) Oh well. What is a mom to do?

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  46. The reality just of who you are just makes me laugh! i mean that in a good way :)
    hey, i thought i was the only one who was not so sure about the hermit crab as ours died this week? and why you ask? b/c my son had a fever ALL WEEK TOO! but, not the snotty nose diagnosis (so pray for him please). well, keep up the laughs...the only way to make it in our blessed vocation as a mommy 24-7!

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  47. Oooh yay, my comments are finally working. I have the same problem with my son except for that he usually has a raging fever when we leave the house that mysteriously disappears during the 15 minute drive to the doc's office. I think I will start driving him there to ward off infections.

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  48. I can't stand when I take one of my 3 kids to the doctor and they say it is just a virus and then that day or the next they are perfect again like they were never sick in the first place. Why do they do that to me? But when I try to "wait it out" as they always tell me they get worse and its a Friday night so no doctor until monday and then they are just pitiful and they ask why you didn't bring them in on Friday? Ugghh I can never win.

    I know its not easy to type with a toddler pushing her feet in your face. But here's one to try lol. Try to type while you are sitting on the couch with a 2yo climbing from behind you over top your head into your lap all while you are trying to talk on the phone to your mother who thinks I have the entire circus IN my house!! That was me, last night and all I could do was laugh.

    Love your blog, makes me remember that I am not the only one having difficult, busy days with the kids.

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  49. I'm like that, too, with the doctor. I never know when it's serious enough to take mine, either. One had a broken thumb for three days before someone at church said, "Uh, I think that's a broken thumb."

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  50. Mince is a scottish (could be UK, but my husband's family is from Scotland and they are the only ones I've ever heard using and/or eating mince)...where was I? Oh, yes...mince is scottish. It's ground beef with onions, carrots and salt and pepper. It's called "mince" because it's "minced meat" (as in ground beef).

    :)

    Don't know if you were really interested in knowing that, but there you go.

    And thank you for making me smile today.

    Barbara
    Ottawa, Ontario
    Canada

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  51. oh, i can so relate. I am mostly the neglectful mom, because I hate to get the snotty nose diagnosis, so I wait and wait and wait, until they aren't sleeping at night, and I am up with them every hour on the hour. then I go in and they have something awful like scarlet fever, double ear infections and the most horrible croupy cough he has ever heard.
    Good luck with the writing. You are a natural. thanks for the good laughs.

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  52. I love doctors. (insert sarcasm). I have 5 kids. 3 in elementary school, 1 in preschool, and the baby. Someone is always sniffling, sneezing, spotted, or puking. I have a 2 day rule. I treat it for 2 days, and if it's not better, they go in. (unless there is screaming from pain, obvious dehydration or bones protruding) My favorite diagnosis, "It's just viral, there's nothing you can do". Yeah, thanks.....(for nothing).....

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  53. Don't you just love those $20.00 lollypops or stickers? tee hee hee

    Nikki from NJ

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  54. I'm with on the sick kids. I just wish they came with a flashing neon sign on their forehead that tells me when they need to go the doctor. Maybe a pop up timer like some turkeys have. I don't know..just a thought! Enjoy your blog a bunch. God Bless you in all your trying days. :)

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  55. I totally understand! You don't want to pay $20 for a "hey stupid, what are you wasting my time for?" diagnosis, and you don't want to be featured in the "who's who for neglectful parents." I'm always wondering if I should take my kids in to the doctor over this or that. So I take them into the doctor, who inevitably tells me "probably a virus. Come back in a week if it hasn't gone away or it gets worse." And more often than not, they catch something worse after being at the doctor and taste testing all of the books and toys there. You can't win.

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  56. I agree 100% with the Snotty Nose diagnosis thing. Except, our doctor likes to call it "a virus that can last up to 2 weeks" .... so, it poses a serious problem for us because it makes me want to wait a minimum of 2 weeks before taking my little guy in. Doesn't everything pretty much cure itself in 2 weeks?

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  57. I was tempted to do the math problem, but didn't find the time yesterday as I struggle to keep up with my 3 boys. The reason I would seemingly torture myself? It's the challenge. Of course each of us feel challenged by different things. One person is willing to take on a math problem as a challenge another person is willing to rock climb. I don't feel challenged to rock climb because I don't have the physical strength and I just know that I would fall. Maybe later in life if I can ever make it to the gym first and can overcome the sweaty palms feeling I get when faced with large heights. I did pretty well in math in school so I can see the challenge of a math problem...do I still remember enough from school to figure out the problem?...Anyway...BTW, you probably got the meatloaf recipe request because you have earned trust from people and they feel connected to you through your stories and anecdotes, so they come to you for advice and to answer questions just as anyone would a friend :)

    Thanks for your blog it helps me to remember that these moments in life with my kids can actually be humorus and don't have to be just frustrating and stressful.

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  58. As a father of 4, I can appreciate all you go through. Good luck at whatever life brings you.

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  59. Meatloaf - yuk! Before I said, "I do" my wife had to promise to never fix me meatloaf.

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  60. That "Goodnight ole chap. Pip pip cheerio" line is from the Backyardigans "Tasha's Tea Party" episode. How sad is it that I know that?

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  61. I am the mother of four and feel as though I just started when it comes to anything medical! I have a friend (who is also in our pediatric group) and inevitably, when he is on call, I have a sick child question...so...he started recently teasing me about the whole on call thing, letting me know when he is on call and telling me to go ahead home and call him so we can get it out of the way...nice ;)

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  62. Meatloaf Recipe...

    Two pound of ground beef
    Two eggs
    1/2 to 1 cup pureed 'neglected' veggies (like spinach...they'll never know it's in there!)
    Finely chopped green pepper
    (To taste)
    Onion powder
    Garlic powder
    Parsley
    Salt & Pepper
    Worchester Sauce

    Mix everything together. Plop in greased bread pan. Bake 350 for one hour, or until done.

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  63. Dawn,

    I love going to the doctor! I really should just work there. I come in, and everyone recognizes me, "Good Afternoon Mrs. Peterson" ...I wave and kind of nod...thinking 'Oh shut up! I know I bring my kids in for stupid things like a hangnail problem.' Oh well, at least the last time I went in they diagnosed me with an ear infection...I knew something was wrong with one of us.
    Good thing there's no mental health doctors there, i'd be in a straight jacket for sure.

    Tami

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  64. How many meatloaf recipes are you gonna get??? Here's the best one, I promise:

    1 lb Hamburger (meatloaf mix)
    1/2 cup Oatmeal
    1/2 cup shredded Cheddar Cheese
    1 Egg (beaten first)
    Diced onion to taste
    1/4 tsp. Paprika
    1/4 tsp. Garlic Salt
    1/4 tsp. Black Petter
    1/4 cup Milk

    Mix all together with your hands and form into one loaf or 2 small loaves, make an indent line with your finger so the sauce can settle on top.

    Sauce:
    1/2 cup Brown Sugar
    2/3 cup Ketchup
    2 tsp. Mustard

    Mix and spoon on top of Meatloaf.
    Bake for one hour at 350 degrees.

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  65. Oh, Dawn, I didn't mean to imply you were misleading about St. Jude's! :(

    I didn't know if perhaps when you signed for the donation link there was a default option of a $10 donation or if it was mandatory.

    I think posting that shows just one more selfless side of you.

    Please keep writing. We love you for it! :- )

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  66. Here is a meatloaf recipe:

    1/4 cup packed brown sugar
    1/2 cup ketchup
    1 1/2 pounds lean ground beef
    1/2 cup milk
    few splashes of worcestershire sauce
    2 eggs
    1 1/2 teaspoons salt
    1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
    1 small onion, chopped
    1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
    3/4 cup finely crushed saltine cracker crumbs

    Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease a 5x9 inch loaf pan.
    Mic together ketchup and brown sugar and worcestershire sauce in a small bowl, set aside.

    In a mixing bowl, mix thoroughly all remaining ingredients + dash or two of worcestershire sauce and shape into a loaf.

    Bake in preheated oven for 30 minutes then spread ketchup mixture on the top. Cook another 30 minutes.

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  67. Dawn, I hate trying to figure out when to take my kids to the doctor too. I think I wear out the nurse line in our pediatrician's office. Even then, I've taken my son in and they dx'd him with the flu and he ended up with emergency surgery on his intestines that same night. So don't beat yourself up too much. Sometimes docs have been wrong.

    Love your blog!

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  68. LOL, my husband is British. I had no idea what minced meat was for a while - until he showed me in the store and I corrected him, "that's ground beef". Brits have a lot of different names for things. I fancy myself quite fluent now (oh snap, I just wrote in "British" --- he's rubbing off on me!!!) *giggle*

    (the above meatloaf recipe sounds delish - I saw that one coming!)
    Can't ever win with docs huh? Hope you're sweetie pie gets over her sniffles soon.

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  69. Hey i was justr wondering, how can you find out how many hits there are on a blog?

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  70. I love this post -- my daughter was sick last week with the same cold my son had a couple weeks before. My son was put on antibiotics, while my daughter was given cough medicine. Same symptoms, same doctor, different treatment.
    Anyway, to the woman who wanted a meatloaf recipe I thought I'd share my families favorite. ;-)
    http://www.kraftfoods.com/main.aspx?s=recipe&m=recipe/knet_recipe_display&wf=9&recipe_id=65850
    If the link doesn't work, go to www.kraftfoods.com and search for "Easy Meatloaves". You can also stuff the meat mixture in to the cups of a muffin pan instead of shaping into loaves....for some reason my kids think this tastes better.
    Suzanne

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  71. Okay, here is an easy meatloaf recipe. The easiest is to buy some ground chuck and mix it with a can of Hunts (I think that's the brand) Meatloaf sauce and whatever else they list on the can to throw in there; I think it is an egg. A BIG TIP on making meatloaf: Form your loaf and put it down the center of a 9x13 baking pan. This way all your grease runs out and you can mop it up with a paper towel after it cooks. DON'T EVER make a meat loaf in a loaf pan. All that grease just stays in your meatloaf - yuck.

    Easy Meatloaf
    1 pound ground chuck
    Salt and pepper to taste (about 1 t. salt and ¼ t. pepper is what I use)
    ½ cup chopped onion (or just put in some onion flakes if you don’t have time)
    1 egg
    8 oz. canned diced tomatoes or tomato sauce
    ½ cup breadcrumbs
    Mash together (hands work great – clean, preferably) shape into a loaf and put in your baking dish.(remember, no loaf pans!) Bake at 375 until brown.

    EASY and Great Meatloaf topping:
    Mix ketchup, yellow mustard, and brown sugar together – amounts are up to you. Spread on top of meat loaf and pop in the oven for a little longer. YUM!

    Have fun and happy cooking,
    Lisa
    “The Humble Gourmet (really, really humble!)”

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  72. PEOPLE actually solved that math problem.. i had to take a test this week which involved multiplying and dividing fractions... when i looked at it I'm like what the heck??? I for the life of me couldn't remember how to do it... i mean it'd been over 30 yrs since I did that. Of course as soon as I got home I looked it up and the web and instantly remembered how to do it.. apparently I got enough of the other stuff right as I was called back to get the job :) yeah....
    also as far as doctors... sometimes I think they're no different than mechanics... they really haven't a clue but just tinker and guess ( not all).
    Again, funny stuff!

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  73. mince is ground meat. I think it usually refers to hamburger or ground chuck, but can also be referring to lamb.

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  74. It's Magic Dr's Office Air. Really. If they could just figure out a way to bottle it, they'd be rich.

    Right. They're doctors and they are rich.

    So WE mothers of the world need to figure out a way to bottle it and sell it to the ...

    Wait. If we mothers figure it out, who will we sell it to? Hmm.

    Must rethink this one.

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  75. Oh, but you've never LIVED until you are 800 miles from home visiting relatives for the holidays, and your 2 year old gets sick. You take them to to doctor because you're worried about it and you're flying home the next day. Doctor tells you "oh, it's an ear infection" even though it's obvious she's having trouble breathing. You ask said doctor 3 times if she's sure it's her ears. Finally take her word for it and go get the antibiotic. Six hours later you end up taking same child to the ER because her breathing is so bad that they come within 2 minutes of putting a tube down her throat because the three breathing treatments and 2 steroid injections aren't working yet. And then same child ends up staying on the pediatric ICU for the next 4 days and you have to reschedule your flight home. Oh, and the doctors at the hospital all tell you her ears are fine, it was never her ears at all, it's Viral Croup and her throat is closing up, that's why she can't breathe. All while also dealing with the other, not sick, child, who is only 4 months old at the time.

    Glad you just got the snotty nose this time.

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  76. i just wanted to say thank you for all the great stories! anyone who has kids can definitely relate to ur experiences, but few could put them in such humorous words on paper! I am really looking forward to ALL the books you will have published! Thank you again for being such a bright spot in my day!

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  77. Ha! I blog one handed, while nursing my 11 month old, with her foot up my shirt and toe in my nose! I'm in good company I guess. :)

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  78. I have also found that my kids get well the day AFTER going to the doc. So I wonder...If they always get better a day after seeing the doc, why don't I go to the Doc sooner so they will get better sooner? It could work...couldn't it?

    Seriously, glad to hear that Mom's of 6 still get diagnises like stuffy nose, etc. (my favorite diagnosis is....spots...as if I didn't know the child had spots).

    - Lisa, mom to 2

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  79. My favorite was when the Dr. wrote in my son's medical chart: "Mother refuses to believe child ate a foreign substance." This after 6 weeks of diarrhea. Their answer: feed him bananas. *I* was asking if the black strings could be from bananas.
    Turns out: HE'S ALLERGIC TO BANANAS!
    By his 14th month, I had become jaded as to the superhuman intelligence of pediatricians. Shocking.

    So, what kind of cookies did you have? I baked 2 rum cakes last night to take to people. Should I have made one to send you?

    Enjoy the day, MamaDawn!
    maggieb!

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  80. Dawn- what kind of car do you drive. I mean, do you own a short bus to transport your children?

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  81. Not to play "I can top that" - but my daughter had a broken arm for a week before I brought her to the doctor. In my defense, she was using it normally, just complaining occasionally that it hurt, so it's not all my fault.

    Also - I can't get into the archives on your blog and I'm new to it, having been sent a copy of your e-bay auction by a friend. Is there some sort of secret?

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  82. not that you have much time to sit and watch video's all day but this youtube video is so funny, and as a mom I can relate so I am positive you can relate to it too.
    I wanted to share it with you

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY#

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  83. Dawn,

    I just got this link in an email and although I've never commented here before, I love your blog. You should watch this short video from youtube because I think you can make it your theme song.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

    Have a great day!

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  84. I have to respond because I know exactly what you mean! I think parents should be given doctor kits when their kids are born and taught how to diagnose an ear infection. I never know when its bad enough to call the doctor.

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  85. The whole doctor thing has always been a hard question for me too, mainly because my kids inevitably pick up another virus while we're there. So I really have to be sure it's worth that risk. Last year it was a shock if we were healthy 2 weeks in a row - those preschool germs are CRAZY!! My DD once had a fever for 10 days straight - probably mono, the doctor said. Nothing we can do about it. Lovely. The worst for me is croup. Did you have to deal with that? Is he wheezing or not wheezing? Do we go to the ER or is this steam helping enough. Scary. Somehow we've been healthy the first month of school this year, which is a rather huge miracle in my book. How many snotty noses do you think you've wiped? There's a high number for you I bet! :-)

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  86. OR you can crock it for 6 hours on low!

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  87. *LOL* Our pediatrician calls it a virus that lasts up to 2 weeks, too.

    I've taken the kids in just when I've thought that they were not getting any better. I call it a "sanity check" especially for the little ones. I've honestly asked the doctor - just how much sympathy does she need??

    Hope everyone gets to feeling better, soon!!!

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  88. Hey girlie:

    YOU and your readers will appreciate this YouTube link. It's clean, it's for and about moms, and the last words will sound vaguely familiar.

    Enjoy!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_oc1j5NakY

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  89. I have enjoyed reading your blog since I found the pokemon post on ebay...

    Today is my two year anniversary from being diagnosed with cancer; please visit my site to see how I’m doing.

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  90. Dawn,

    I'm getting an error saying your blog is in violation of the TOS (terms of service). I can only read it if I am logged into my blog account.

    Just an FYI. I'm not sure what is up but wasn't sure if you knew or not.

    Man I will be BUMMED if you have to take this blog down! Reading your blog puts a smile on my face every morning!

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  91. Didn't mean to make you feel guilty, I apologize. Also, my daughter gets pneumonia every winter.. EVERY WINTER! Each time I'd see this one doctor in the practice he'd say she was fine and just had an upper respiratory infection, well next day we'd go back in for a chest xray and she'd have it in both lungs. Thanks to super crappy insurance I couldn't find a more competent doc(there were other things too) and now that we've moved I'm looking forward to having a doctor I can tell what's what to.. And my kids, will run high fevers like 103 104 fevers, I call the doc, bundle them up and by the time the nurse sticks the thermometer in their ear, its gone and they're normal. But we go home with a "they'll be fine" and they're sick with fever again.. *sigh* I just know my kids chart suggests I'm one of those parents who claims their kid is sick just for an outing!

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  92. Math. Bah.

    I'll let you know, I found you from a friend who posted your ebay ad on myspace (I know, I know... myspace... I only have it because it's the only way my long-lost friends and I can communicate, unless you count voicemail tag every few months). Anyway, I read the ad, then found your blog. Then I proceeded to do very little work at my boring accounting job the rest of the week (as I said, "bah" to math) and tried VERY hard to stifle my laughs in the quiet cubicle farm. I didn't generally succeed on that last part.

    I'm a doula (in-training), getting ready to go to school to be a midwife... so your blogs are definitely of interest to me and a few friends. :) I enjoy writing in my blog as well (http://theworldasithinkiknowit.blogspot.com/), but my drama focuses more on how I'm trying to wrap my life around helping people birth babies, not actually having them yet. :)

    You are either crazy or a living miracle of survival... either way, an entertaining writer whose book I would buy in a second. :)

    Keep enjoying life!

    Kate

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  93. Thanks for blogging, you are a great read. We have a little in common; I also have six kids, and, well, I guess that's it. I wanna be a writer someday, and I have a blog; do those put me in your league? Not!

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  94. So...I just got a message saying this blog was in violation of blogger something or other and was open to authors only? but then I clicked on your blog address that was listed, and it brought me right to it. Hmmmmm... Are you getting too popular for Blogger's tastes?
    LOVE your blog
    hugs

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  95. Boy, do those kinds of trips to the doctor sound familiar. Loved the "rash in their hair", ROFL! And there definitely is something wrong with anyone who finds solving such math problems as 'fun'! The only math my frazzled-mom mind can handle lately is to just make sure I count two heads in the rearview mirror when we get in the car.

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  96. I read every day, laugh every day, lurk every day. Not today!! When my now 37 year old daughter was about 2, I took her to the doctor because she had ANOTHER ear infection. We had no doctor's office coverage so every visit was a major expense. I was really sick but only had the visit for her. He treated her, looked at me and said that I was sicker than she was, and then treated me for free. I'll never forget his kindness.

    Also, the comment about mince got me to thinking...I love mince pie and could never figure out why there was HAMBURGER in it! Last night I spent a lot of time thinking about it and realized that mince HAD to be the same as ground beef. My grandmother's mother was Irish and I'm sure brought the recipe over with her when she came to this country. All these years and I NEVER knew why it was called MINCE pie. Today I learned something. Thanks, Dawn, for teaching this Grammy something new in addition to making me laugh!!

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  97. I love the "it's just viral" crap.

    So my DS has a lung disease and is on supplemental oxygen. I called Monday because he was getting extremely ill to the STUPID Pediatric Pulmonologist, who had spoken to the pulm on call the night before (who I had called) and they decided without ever seeing my kid that it was "just viral"

    So I took him to his WONDERFUL PED. The man is wonderful to look at and gave me his cell phone number for emergencies. lol. Anyways uh the KID HAS PNEUMONIA.

    So you never can tell.

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  98. Oh - quite a scare today - I wasn't allowed to look at your blog, unless I was signed in. I freaked out for about five minutes before I thought to get an account. SO, I now have one - You're worth it, though. :-P

    Now I forgot what I was gonna say... !!!

    Oh I member - loved the boy saying goodnight, kids say the darnedest things... My 4 yo, C2, said to Grandma yesterday as she was taking him to preK, "My teachers give me snack everyday, but no one ever gives them a snack. Can I take some apples to give to them for snacktime?" Aww, my heart melted!!! Such a sweet child. Almost made up for the fact that he CUT HIS HAIR yesterday - two big chunks right out of the top. So, guess whose gettin' a buzz cut this weekend??

    Enjoyed the post as always. I swear I should start putting my monst - I mean childrens funnies (and not so funnies) into my blog.

    Maybe in my SPARE time. HA.

    Melody, TX

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  99. yes, I am getting the same error message...this blog is in violation of blogspot TOS, if you are the owner of this blog please sign in (paraphrased). it's happening when I try to access older posts--is this my punishment for falling behind by a week or so? LOL ;-)

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  100. I've had the same thing happen to me, which makes me sad because I have to catch up on all of the last couple of months' posts! Everything I've read so far has had my in hysterics - I showed my mum and she was in hysterics too!

    Love love!!

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  101. Jen thanks for the meatloaf recipe!! Have saved it and oh.........we call it mince ( or minced meat) here in Australia too :)

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  102. I was no longer going to leave comments on your blog because you have so many to read and i am sure you get alot of repeats and more repeats but you crack me up.. thanks for making my day brighter.. i was helping at the book fair today and i can across this book titled confessing of a slacker mom..i smile and thought someone found out about me...and wrote a book about it .sorry about the hermit crab..that part was funny also.. Thanks for reading this.

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  103. SCRAPBOOKERS !! OHHHH MY I have new chipboard albums on my blog to show you. These are words that make ablums! CUTE CUTE CUTE!! click on my name and it will take you there to see them!


    Irishmom I am soooo making your meatloaf tomorrow night! My hubby loves meatloaf and your recipe sounds yummy!

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  104. How about this. Do you ever feel like if they weren't sick before the doctors, they will have what ever is out there upon leaving the doctors office? I HATE having to go there for this reason.

    Your blog is great.

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  105. Have you seen the Mom's Overture on YouTube. I think you will get a kick out of it! It is performed by Anita Renfroe, a Christian singer. She has come up with a song that has all the phrases a mom says in one day.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzZJO3ZRNCo

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  106. OMG I know exactly how you feel about looking like the most neglectful mom at the doctor's office. I took my son to the doctor yesterday after noticing that he can't straighten his left arm all the way. Well it turns out that he fractured his elbow three weeks ago when he fell while riding his bike. He cried after the fall, but the next day he was playing as usual, and he did great at Karate, so I assumed that he was fine. I felt like the worst mother in the world when we got the Xrays. It turns out he doesn't need a cast because the fracture is already healing, so he just has to take it easy for a month so that he doesn't end up needing surgery. :(

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  107. I'm getting the same TOS error message: what gives? Is blogger opposed to popular blogs?

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  108. I'm going to be setting up an account just so I can respond with something other than anonyomous!!

    I have one more funny math story even if it gets buired hopefully it will make you laugh.

    Several years ago I was in the check out line at the grocery store. The cashier and packer were discussing a test the next day (they were in the same high school math class). They were discussing how badly they thought they were going to do.

    I smiled and said ... "Don't worry. Unless you are going into engineering or plan to be a doctor - you really don't need math. They tried that stuff with me and I haven't used math except to balance my cheque book since I left high school".

    They both looked at me and said I KNEW IT!!

    To all the math teachers of the world I apologize but I'm still right. LOL

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  109. Dawn,
    What the...is wrong with the blogger? GRRR...do I need to write a letter?

    Tami

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  110. When my crab died, my dad took me out to eat. We went to red lobster. I had crab legs. The world made sense again.

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  111. I am so there with you about never knowing when to take the kid to the doctor. I even call my mom, whose a nurse, and still get the "look at this crazy mother in here with her snotty-nosed boy" from the doctors and staff at our pediatrician's office. In fact, just to make me crazier, they complain about how much earwax he has instead of just patting me on the hand and sending me on my way.

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  112. Hi there
    I can't believe the number of people who responded to my post for a meatloaf recipe. Thank you SO MUCH -and to the lady who said NOT to make it in a loaf tin - that's exactly what I was going to do!! So you saved me from trying the recipes and then saying to myself, huh don't know what all the fuss is about!! Thanks again everyone (especially Dawn).

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  113. NOW I KNOW what MINCE is! No wonder I never enjoyed minced pie.! yuck.

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  114. You never fail. Being a mother, as you know, is an adventure unparalleled but all other experiences in the world, bar none.

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  115. I wanted to avoid being the mom who always had her kid in the doc's office unnecessarily...so I waited two weeks to take my snotty nosed kid in. She had a runny nose - that was it. She didn't even act sick. But after two weeks, I figured I'd better take her in.

    Turned out, she had a pretty bad sinus infection. The doc said she couldn't believe Madi-So was so active and happy with such a serious infection, that most kids were miserable...which, of course, made me feel like a heel for waiting so long.

    Since then, I pretty much call the office about every unusual symptom I might imagine she's suffering...just in case.

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  116. I have a GODFATHER'S MEATLOAF RECIPE....EASY AS PIE....NOT THAT PIE IS EASY..UNLESS YOU WANNA GET SARA LEE LOL....

    1-lb ground beef (lean is best)
    1-egg
    -a SMALL (1/2 the size of the regular one)can tomato sauce
    -SEASONED (ITALIAN)bread crumbs until desired consistency
    -FINELY chopped onion
    -Garlic to taste

    mix all of that out...yes, it is gross with your hands, but it is better than a spoon...flatten it out (like you would do biscuits, if you do not use a can lol)and then add this----

    1-lb of Virginia Baked Ham
    1-pack of Mozzerella cheese

    Make a roll, but MAKE SURE YOU CLOSE ALL EDGES! Having cheese leak out isn't that nice!

    Bake on about 350 degrees for approx one hour...

    This really is good....I HATE MEATLOAF and I LOVE THIS!!! Thanks to my mom.

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This is where you tell me how awesome and funny I am. If you want to tell me how much I suck, you have to use my hate mail form here. http://www.becauseisaidso.com/get-in-touch/hate-mail/ Those are the rules. Oh and I moderate my comments so if your comment doesn't show up immediately, be patient, young Jedi.