Saturday, September 1, 2007

Is That my Hubcap?

My car is dead. Well, I guess it isn't totally dead. Just mostly dead. We first got it in 2003. I think it was 2003 anyway. My memory isn't all that great anymore. Anyway, I had been selling Tupperware and had been driving a company car for the past couple years when I decided I just couldn't keep up with the work any more. For those of us who look forward to dental visits just to get out of the house, those home party businesses are a great opportunity to get a little adult time a couple times a month. If you really want to make money doing it though, you have to work it like a full time job and with five kids, I was having a hard time keeping up with the business and doing two or three parties a week. So, I had to relinquish the company car and quickly find another van that could seat us all. Enter my current van. I remember going to the used car lot and seeing it for the first time. Much like Clark Griswold's metallic pea family truckster, there sat this stunning example of American car manufacturing. When I got in to give it a test drive, I was assaulted with the smell of a hundred wet dogs. And cigars. And an entire football team's sweat socks. And a few dozen poopy diapers.

Naturally my husband and I bought the ugly, smelly van.

After fourteen gallons of Febreeze, it was only mildly stinky and it's held up fairly well for the past four years. Until recently. My hubby replaced the alternator. Who knew? You can't actually start your vehicle without one of these.

We just had the transmission done. Again, this is an important part of a working vehicle. I knew mine was broken when I could no longer go in reverse or drive forward at speeds higher than 15 mph and since I always drive more than fifty, er um, fifteen miles per hour, this really needed to be fixed.

A couple weeks ago I stopped at a red light (because my 3 year old shouted from the backseat, "Stop, Mom! The light is blue!") and I saw out of the corner of my eye, a hubcap go rolling by. MY hubcap go rolling by.

It wasn't bad enough that the air conditioning didn't work, but now the family truckster is overheating. I need to pour a gallon or two of antifreeze in every day. Apparently, antifreeze is necessary for optimum vehicle operation. Again, who knew?

Because my car has been overheating, I borrowed my parents' car to take my son to the doctor a couple weeks ago. I nearly gave myself whiplash driving their car! Every time I just touched the brakes, the car stopped. Quickly. I didn't realize, until I'd driven my parents' car, just how bad my brakes had gotten. Looking back, I should've had a clue as to the deterioration of my brakes when I started having to drag my feet on the street Fred Flintstone style in order to stop, but it just didn't hit me until I borrowed their car.

My husband, car person that he is, can fix the antifreeze leak thankfully. He said something about blah blah blah leaking. Blah blah blah replacement part blah blah blah gasket. Take apart the blah blah blah engine blah blah blah two days.

Oh no! Know what I just realized? Looking at all that "blah blah" text written out like that, I've come to the realization that I listen like my husband does! Oh no! My husband's selective hearing has been making me angry for the past fifteen years and now I'm seeing that I do it too! Oh, this is bad! I can't be mad at him for not listening to me if he finds out that I tuned out his car repair speech! Shhhhhh! Don't tell him! He can't know! Really!

Anyway, I think it's time for a new vehicle. :::sigh:::

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Thank you for the suggestion of eliminating dairy to alleviate chronic ear infections. I've actually heard this from other people before, however, most of my kids don't get ear infections. They just have really large tonsils and adenoids which make swallowing and breathing difficult, and throat infections frequent. The big tonsils and adenoids also cause sleep apnea and prevent their eustachian tubes from draining well. Although their ears don't get infected, they're perpetually filled with fluid which has created temporary hearing loss in several of my kids. This is the eighth surgery like this between my children. Thank you so much for your well wishes. I'm sure all will go well. :)
Actually, your prayers and/or well wishes would be appreciated for Conway Beckemeier who just underwent surgery to repair the congenital defect in his heart, Julian Avery who has been battling a cancerous brain tumor, and Adam Sadda who has severe combined immunodeficiency and needs a bone marrow transplant. I have links on the right side of my blog with their stories. I believe you need to sign in to access Julian's carepages. There was another person who wrote me about their son who had a double lung transplant and I can't for the life of me, find that email anywhere. I'm so sorry I lost your email. I'm horribly unorganized and simply have too much mail to sort through. If you read this post, please send me another email, so I can add a link for your son.

Enjoy your weekend!

96 comments:

  1. Started reading your blog a few days ago and love it!! I have 4 boys, ages 4, 2, 2 & 16 months. All 4 of mine are like your baby, throwing all the toys all over the house! I went back and read most of your blog entries. I love to see how many readers you have!
    We drive a Sequoia. A car like that might fit your whole brood... and guzzle their entire college fund! :)

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  2. Your van sounds just like mine, only mine is 12 years old and we have bets among ourselves as to which part is going to break next. My 12 year old just won $5.00 because now the passenger side window won't go down. Anyway, I'm pretty sure it's going to fall into pieces right in the middle of the road someday, but we can't afford a car payment, so I will continue to drive it until it does!

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  3. When you ask us how much and how long, we don't exactly know. After all we are husbands not autoparts salesmen. So we try to give you as much information as we can.

    Unfortunately you probably interpreted that as blahblah bu blah blah blah.

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  4. My brother just sent me your post for pokemon cards on ebay and I have to say I have not laughed so hard all by myself in a long time! I have 5 kids, the oldest turned 6 last week, I feel your shopping pain. Your blog looks so funny. I look forward to reading it regularly. Thanks so much for the laugh, I needed it.

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  5. Dawn,
    I look forward to each and every post on your blog. I am relieved to know I am not crazy and that humor is truely essential to living well.
    I am the product of a large (seven kids), homeschooled (ie. isolated), dirt poor (qualified for the school lunch program even though we were homeschooled), and was born deaf. And I am FINE!! (relatively, anyway) I have a great husband, a three year old son, complete hearing, and am full time student at the university.
    I love your writing and how much it reminds me of living at home in all the wonderful, loud, loving chaos. Although I only have one son, I have my crazy mommy moments and enjoy reading yours.
    Keep it up! You are an inspiration to many!
    Gina

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  6. You are my hero!!!! I read your blog and LOL all every post! You describe my life minus 2 kids and a DH. My husband died in a crash on 4/6/07 and I am raising 4 kids alone. I think my kids have done everything your kids have, honestly. When I saw Baby in the toilet, I thought, yeah, that is my life!!!!
    We too have been through many car transformations. My DH too always fixed our cars so I HAD to buy a new car after he died b/c our other car had over 100,000 miles on it and there is no way I can fix that stuff on my own!!
    I just want to take a minute to THANK YOU for the inspiration to go on every day. You make me laugh and remind me to make everyone else laugh along with you with your various tales of motherhood. THANK YOU DAWN!!!!!!!!! YOU ROCK!!!!!!

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  7. I have 7. I should really be more creative than this. But, I'm not so much.

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  8. WOW makes you feel thankful for your life and health!! Prayers to all of those families!!!

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  9. I purposely leave two hubcaps off my car (one each side). Makes it easier to spot from a distance in the parking lot. Shiny wheel, black whole - yep that's my car.
    Car mechanics don't get it though - they keep listing it as a defect on my car services and offer to fit new ones :)

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  10. Yikes! Good Luck getting the car in working order long enough to find a new family vehicle (which is just horror inducing itself).

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  11. No, no, no...we are exempt from any talk about cars, computers or sports. I swear to you my husband starts talking about what we need to do NEXT for the network [geek, much?] and the teachers' voice from the Peanuts specials comes out of his mouth.

    "Wahwah wahwahwah wah router, wahwahwah wireless wahwahwah, wahwah hard drive wahwahwahwah, motherboard wahwahwahwah."

    All you have to do if he catches you is yell "OLLY OLLY OXEN FREE!" and touch your forehead to the refrigerator door. COMPLETELY exempt. I swear.

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  12. OMG! This is my life. And you put down in words. You are so darn funny! Erma Bombeck is laughing in heaven, with tears running down her cheeks. She is saying, "Someone took it and ran with it. My legacy continues." Best of luck to you and your family. :)

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  13. My dads alternator is broke too!
    :( so we have been driving the bmw everywhere. I get ear infections too and its bothering me. I dont eat meat so giving up dairy would be hard.
    ♥Vivacious Victor

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  14. Zero comments! Wow, it pays to rise early. Don't think I could make it through the day without reading your blog. Thanks for the laughs, and you're right, I'll pray for those you mentioned and all the children who suffer.
    CathieK44

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  15. Sorry to hear abt the Car Dawn !! I hope you can get a good deal on a nice smelling Bus soon :)
    Better yet I hope some one gives you guys one !! Maybe some rich lady or man will read your story and Donate to help you and your beautiful family. I know If I had the money and Was nearer I would LOVE to give you a helping hand !!

    I have to say that "Good food ad" Seems to be a constant down load and Never finishes so I Can stay on your page for long.. I guess its new ? I havnt noticed the constant action on the bar telling me its still loading.
    *hugs*
    Debbie xxx

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  16. I totally understand...I drive a 1995 suburban with 248,000 miles on it. No that is not a typo and yes all those zeros are suppossed to be there. I just cleaned it out yesterday and found half my kitchen under the boys seats. Yuck! One of my twins also had partial hearing loss because his hole from his tubes never closed. he had to have it patched when he had his tonsils and adnoids done. He could never hear very well due to all the fluid and then woth the hole it was worse. Now that it's all finally fixed the Dr. says he has "forgotten" how to hear. Likely story. I think it's just male selective hearing. :)

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  17. Hey, at least you try to listen. You seem to have gotten a few words in there, and I'm sure they were important. I am not a car person. So my brain saw it as a word, and just went ahead and replaced it with 'blah' instead.

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  18. I'm enjoying your blog! I hope the surgery goes well and is as uneventful as a surgery can be. :) We too had 2 sets of tubes by 18 months with my oldest but it was when the dr removed his HUGE adenoids that the ear infections went away. Sometimes, it's just too much of a good thing and must go - like tonsils and adenoids.

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  19. UGH! The vehicle! If I could get away with it I would go to the horse and buggy! I would rather feed and care for my horses than deal with vehicle repairs. But most people frown on hitching posts and the piles of . . . um . . . leftovers left behind.

    The only way we have been able to deal with the vehicle repairs is owning one truck and having it paid for. Since we don't have monthly payments we can afford to fix it from time to time.

    Love reading your stuff!

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  20. Of our 9 kiddos, 4 (it seems maybe a 5th) have had this same problem. We've had 8 surgeries related to it. One of my daughter's adenoids actually grew back ,LARGER than before and had to be removed again. Her speech had started to sound swallowed which clued me into the problem. Be watchful of their teeth. 2 of my kids had to have A LOT of dental repair because of what the acids from the yucky tonsils did to their teeth. Good luck!

    Check out our website for more motherly advice and family fun; web.mac.com/nav8ryf

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  21. Car troubles - they are the bane of my existence. The Galant needs a new air conditioner and struts. Currently my husband is sweating away as he drives to work. (He works with juvenile delinquents (24 hr/7 day a week job.))

    The truck needs a new left side mirror, clutch and something called a solenoid. Oh yeah, the lights have gone out on the dash too. That can't be good, right?

    Your blogs really bring a smile to my face.

    Sorry about the condition of your children's tonsils and adenoids. I hope the surgeries have worked well for each of them.

    And my prayers will go to all the people you mentioned. Thanks for bringing them up.

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  22. Dawn: How I have enjoyed popping in to read your blog over the last week or so - ya know, ever since I read your hysterical Ebay posting. Anyhoo, loving reading about your parenting adventures. Keep up the good work.

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  23. Don't you just love unsolicited advice, especially from 40,000 of your closest friends? :-)

    I continue to smile every time I read your blog. Have a smile on me today!

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  24. By the way, i forgot to tell you. Head on over to my blogspot and scroll down the right hand column all the way. There's something nice waiting for you there.

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  25. I know that you're terribly busy, but I just wanted to say how much I look forward to your updated blog everyday!!! I have a 7 month old daughter and although I don't have 6 kids, she brightens my day!!! Congratulations on the success of your blog, I came across it after your ebay ad. I have since read every post and LOVE IT! I hope you have a fabulous day!!

    ~Cheryl
    Toronto, ON, Canada

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  26. Oh car fun. My parents have had the issue of keeping a reliable car that can hold all the kids. For a few years they had a big ol' suburban. Dad loved it, step mom did not - at all. The ac didn't work, no matter what repairs they made. Finally they got rid of it and thought a mini van would do since they were just sure they were done having kids and all. Surprise! Another baby came along and they are back to driving two cars around. Hope your repairs go smoothly. I think my hubby's okay with me tuning out his car talk so long as I'm okay with him tuning out my scrap talk.

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  27. My friend's 4-year old child just had her adenoid/tonsils removed. Watch out! She got more active once they took them out!

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  28. Sometimes (for some reason) it is hard to let go of an old car that doesn't work. It's just so damned USEFUL! In theory.

    Good luck with a new car hunt.

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  29. I love reading your blog every day! It reminds me of my own childhood (I was #6 of 8 kids). I showed my mom your pokemon story and she really loved it. She said the only thing missing was coming home with children running wild everywhere, your arms full of groceries and your husband sitting on the couch asking "What took you so long?"

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  30. good luck car shopping and with your little ones surgery.
    My youngest had cloged tear ducts and had to have them probed. the worst part tho I would say was him waking up after all the drugs he screamed and hit me repeditly because he didn't know who I was.
    I love reading your blog! you give me and a lot of other moms the streangth to carry on even after we say things like "No you can not sit on your brothers head." or the ever popular "No you can not fly off the couch."

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  31. I feel your pain about the car. I've been driving a 12 year old car approximately 90 miles a day for my job and slowly it has been falling apart. This time, though, the Fates have made the decision for me: my husband (in his car) and I (in my car) got into an accident together. Most likely my insurance company will consider my car totaled so I'll finally be able to get a newer car.

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  32. WOW I think that I am first!!! Shocking! Anyway I love reading your blog.

    I have two boys ages 9 and 2.5 and my youngest is CRAZY he to likes to jump out of the cart as I am picking up something that he threw out. He tries to FLY off everything because he is SoopieMan (Superman). I just heard CRASH, BOOM, INSERT CRYING HERE, yet again he was trying to fly off the bed.

    I can not believe the people that have responded to your Pokemon list it is crazy so many people relate to everything that you say (or write in your case). As for shopping at my house I do it when my husband is off so i get some free time and the shopping done in peace.

    Anyway you have enough to read so I will catch you later. How in the world do you read all these!!

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  33. Haha, selective hearing ... my hubby and I do that all the time. We've been married for nine years (known each other for about 11), and we've only recently started getting the hang of *not* doing that. It's tough sometimes, especially when he's talking about an area in which I have zero skill. I try hard to pay attention, but I know my eyes glaze over once in a while. His do too, I'm sure, when I start talking about the things in my life he's not much involved in. Fair's fair, I guess - equal opporunity glazing :P

    Like many others, I found your blog when someone sent me a link to your auction. I'm currently in the hospital recovering from chemotherapy for leukemia (I'm in remission, yay!). Normally, I'm a pretty positive person (my mother-in-law calls me her "freakin' ray of sunshine"), but feeling this puny can send one's mind in negative directions, and I end up moping about spats with friends, being stuck in the hospital too long, how much it's all costing, etc. This is not good when one is trying to get well. Your wonderful writing and boundless humor give me the healing gift of laughter every day, which is simply priceless. The more you can laugh at life, and make us laugh along with you, the better it will get (for all of us:) Keep up the good work and stay positive - I'll try to do the same :)

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  34. I've been reading your blog since the whole Ebay listing. As a former Chicagoan - now living in predominantly Mormon Utah, with two small and rambucious boys, I have my own challenges. I like your writing. It's nice to know others struggle just as much as I do!

    www.draperdaily.blogspot.com

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  35. omg I also remember the day I realized I toned out the bf. It was a proud dirty little secret for me too! so funny. If we can only learn to do it as often as men we will be good.

    Good luck with the car. My past cars were named the death trap, the hoopdee, the little green breakdown machine... so needless to say I feel your pain. Hang in there.

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  36. Fairly new reader here...but I like you have selective hearing when it comes to automotive repair. shhh! I won't tell if you won't. My van has actually been sitting in the parking spot since June. We are stationed in Germany and my husband IS ordering the part this week!!! Of course it'll probably take a month for it to arrive and then a few days to a week for our friend to get the van actually fixed, since the whole front end has to come out! YIKES!

    Going to read the links you shared.

    God Bless

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  37. I'm still trying to convince myself I can fit 4 kids into my Intrepid. I'd kill for a minivan.

    Or something with A/C. Anything.

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  38. I'm here because my daughter sent me a link to your eBay posting. Thanks for the best laugh in a long time.

    As the mother of 7 grown children (yes, they do eventually grow up and leave home) I can identify with most of your postings.

    So nice of you to include a prayer list. I have prayed for them and will continue to do so, but also for your child who needs the operation.

    You have a gift for seeing that even though your life may be stressful, there are many others who have much more serious problems.

    You also have a gift for enjoying the journey. The only thing more wonderful than children is grandchildren. Their parents handle the hard things and you get all the hugs and kisses and fun parts.

    Blessings on your head as you do the most important job in the world--raising children!

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  39. My son had to have his adenoids removed when he was 3, too - he snored like a banshee! Seriously, it was like grown-man snores coming out of this precious little 3-year-old guy. Adenoids out - no more snoring!

    We had the same problem with ear infections, too - with both my daughter and my son. They outgrew it.

    I just found your blog and I'm loving it! Keep those posts coming!

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  40. I thought you would get a kick out of this.

    Mommy merit badges!

    http://www.mamameritbadges.com/shop/

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  41. Bleh, I hate car woes. Our last car was a rusty old half-functioning hunk-o-junk that my MIL gave us for free. We managed to get about a year's worth of driving out of it before it died forever. Now we have no car, and I realize that even though our old car was a total POS, it was better than nothing. :(

    I hope your vehicle gets fixed in a timely fashion! Being without transportation sucks!

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  42. Oh my...I think you need a vacation...If I ever win the lottery I'm sending you away for a month.

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  43. You tell such classic stories! I love to read everything you write. Have you heard of the web series "In the Motherhood". You could write every episode! I was not a blogger until I started to read your blog. You have inspired me. Life with children is so... um, exciting? Never a dull moment! Thanks for making me laugh at those "exciting" events of motherhood!

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  44. I so know what you mean about selective hearing! Even though he's looking right at me, my husband hears NOTHING about what I need him to do for the day, but hears every syllable of what I'm muttering under my breath as I'm walking away.

    To be fair, though, my eyes glaze and I, too, have gone off to some distant land in my mind when he talks about the car or tools...

    I love your kids' names! Great creativity. For reasons unknown to me, my parents didn't give us middle names. I think my mother said once, "You'll never use it." Well, my first name is Sandy and my maiden name is one of those that always has to be spelled and pronounced. So when I got married, I took my husband's last name, which is Anderson.

    Yes, of course, Sandy Anderson is a name that a middle name would never be useful for! Just at the quilt store I used to go to there were 4 Sandy Anderson's! I solved the problem by using my maiden name for my middle name. Now I have a middle initial and I write out my full name, complete with the initial, every chance I get.

    I'm keeping Conway, Julian and Adam, and all those children in the world who can use some extra love, in my thoughts and prayers.

    And make sure you keep writing, Dawn! Sometimes we don't choose a career; a career chooses us... even while we're doing something else.

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  45. I think you should contact a couple car companies and get them to donate a van or something to you in exchange for a little advertising on your page. With the number of hits you get from each of your blogs they just might go for it. Plus show them all the interviews that you do and then you can mention them on any future interviews.

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  46. Thanks for my daily giggle. Hey, list your clunker on Ebay and I bet you could at least get enough to buy a new one. Ü

    I will add those you listed to my prayers. Your little one too!

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  47. That's a bummer about your van issues. We have owned a van for about a year and a half. Before that we had "special" cars. On my last car I had a dark green door and the rest of my car was plum. The door worked temporarily and then I had to get out the passenger side. The window didn't work so I got to open my door to use the drive through. The worst part?? NO RADIO!! EEK! ;) Before that I drove a 1978 dodge aspen that my parents bought me while I was in high school. In the winter my car would die every time I stopped,no matter how long I warmed it up. I had to put the car in neutral when I stopped and say a prayer that it wouldn't die again.

    My hubby had a 280 Z for a short time until a fire started under the hood. Good times.

    Good luck with your vehicle search.

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  48. I've been following your blog ever since there was a link to your ebay auction on Fark.com and I have been beyond vastly amused, and as a fellow writer i can't help but say things to myself like, i love her she's an amazing writer that $%#(@ (censored for the chidren). Of course, i kid, about the censored word anyway.

    you have made me more tolerant of giant gaggles of children with their mothers in stores. In fact, i started laughing the other day at goodwill because i thought for a second it was actually you! same sense of humor when speaking to the children and the clerk. I think i found your doppleganger.

    anyway, i am pleased to read your blog. you crack me up. take care, dawn!

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  49. I bought my 15 pasenger 2006 Victory red chevy van from a dealer on Ebay in Texas. I love it. The gas mileage stinks, but other than that? Evryone fits in 1 car, with room between them so they don't fight.

    My job makes the payments on my van and my 2006 Camry I use for commuting. Hubby still drives the 1993 Chevy Caprice Station wagon we bought used in 1997.

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  50. Cars can just be the worst source of frustration! We recently bought a used van and now that the 30 day warranty is up, we discovered (I think ON day 31) exactly WHY it was traded in by the previous owner - about $1000+ in repairs are needed for OUR new baby! Fortunately it can limp along into next year's inspection - it was the dealer who passed the inspection of course!

    Wasn't there a story circulating a few years ago, I believe it was even covered by The Today Show, about a young woman (late teens, early twenties) who needed money, so she set up a donation page on her website and people actually gave her a lot of money? I don't think she even had a sob story to go with it - she just liked to spend! But I think of all of the people who could really use the money, like due to medical reason that has truly wiped them out, or something like that. At the moment we feel we're bleeding money a little. My one year old finally got tubes in his ears 6 weeks ago and the bills are trickling in, in addition to all of the car repairs. Miraculously we seem to be able to keep our heads above water enough after every paycheck (well, the Christmas fund hasn't seen a penny since....? (coal for the kids?)...and our property tax savings fund is a bit dry at the moment...so that's where the money is coming from!) Back to my one year old - he has had fluid in his ears since he was 9 months old and he didn't begin to have any dairy until he was about 1. I did ask the pediatrician about dairy linked to ear infections and she was adamant that there was no connection. One doctor's opinion.

    My prayers and thoughts are with the Beckemeier family, the Avery family, and the Sadda family during their difficult times.

    ~Molly in NH

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  51. Well, I feel your pain on the car thing. See- cars usually don't like me much. From the very first car-that stalled on me like 5 times on a 4 hour trip but didn't happen til the last 15 minutes of the trip. Then there was the little red LOUD car that my dad apparently thought was a good investment and then blamed for the thing not being a good investment. Then there was the brand new car I decided I needed to have. After 3 weeks exactly the entire electrical system shorted out due to some defect (no kidding) and there was this dinging noise at first and the locks kept locking and unlocking (totally possessed). Then this car had the knack of being in accidents. An ex friend backed into someone pulling out of my driveway, my mom brushed the back of another car, I scraped the front side a bit on something, a short bus hit it and tore off the front end of it, a car in the mall parking lot swiped the front of it, it hydroplaned in a rainstorm in the middle of the highway at night and finally 3 days later something gave (the blah blah blah) and the car went out of control and up a small hill and flipped over (needless to say it was totalled). So then I got my guts back and got another car. This time (after I got over some fear) I went for the one that was only a couple years old. It's been okay, I guess. Except that the tires keep going weirdo on me, the horn just decied to stop working, the light on the clock works when it wants to and it has this unalienable tendency to soak the driver's side back seat when it rains or I go through the car wash which then causes a month or more of it smelling like mildew.
    So that's my story and I'm sticking to it...
    Sorry that was so long. As if you have time these days to read so much. It takes me forever just to read all your comments....

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  52. Cars have a way of telling you that it's time to part ways...like when it costs MONEY every MONTH to fix a this or that. I have finally made the decision to sell my car, that I ADORE, after 9 years of ownership. I just can't keep feeding it all my money. Good luck with the surgery! Best thing I ever did was go against the doctor and insist that he take out my son's tonsils (he was 4) after 5 strep throats in less than one year. Lo and behold....he NEVER had another strep throat (and he is now 28). After 9 strep throats we had my daughter's tonsils/adenoids removed (she was 14)...again...no more issues with ears/throat!

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  53. I just wanted to comment first. to tell you I enjoy reading your blog.
    I understand your car woes.. we've done a transmission. total air conditioning and some other various ouch. car repairs recently.

    Blessings,
    M

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  54. I found you because of the ebay email going 'round, of course :) Anyway, you're a great read and my family will absolutely pray for the people you listed. Have a great day! Thanks for the chuckles :)

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  55. OK I find this hysterical...my husband owns his own auto shop (more like hot rods and custom upholstery) and I am continually reffering to things on cars like the "trans-modu-fub-lab-u-lator." Well at least it sounds technical....

    Angela

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  56. Girlfriend, milk your newfound celebrity for all it's worth - maybe there is a local car dealer who would LOVE to provide a van for you and your family. You could offer a recommendation on your blog as payment (hey, with all of the hits you get every day, chances are good that it could boost business)!

    It's so awesome that you have asked people to pray for others who are less fortunate than you, and the fact that you provided links, too? You are so thoughtful of others.

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  57. Antifreeze leaking is either a hose, the water pump, the radiator or the big seal between the top and bottom parts of the engine. I can't remember what the seal is called. :)

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  58. Who knew!!! Did you know that you have to change your oil when the thing reaches a certain mileage or that if it ticks, you probably haven't checked or added some oil in a while. These are things that I blah blah blah to my husband and what do I know. Wait till I tell him we need to fix the muffler.

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  59. Is it sad when I tell you that I look forward to your blog updates? Does that mean I don't have a life??..lol.. Or is it that after 9 years of being a parent I've finally realized that I'm not the only one with THAT life??..lol..

    Being the Mom of 4 boys I could totally relate to your stint at the store, which brought about the auction on ebay. I actually had one of the lovely ladies at the local grocery store I frequent (quite often might I add since we're always out of milk or bread...) mention to me that she didn't recognize me at my last visit because only 1 of my 4 kids was with me. Ha! What does THAT tell ya?

    Sorry to hear about your van. With the press you've been getting recently, I wonder if we should forward this blog entry to your local dealer and see if they'll spring a car for you (what's your favorite make and model??..lol).. Great publicity for them, kwim?

    Anywho, I'm now going to take a shower (what's that??) since my 2 year old has finally given in and is taking nap. Otherwise he would be in the bathroom two seconds after I turn the water on, climb into the tub while my head is being pounded with water (he's sneaky like that, almost like he knows I can't see or hear him), and smile at me, all wet shirt and droopy cloth diaper... *sigh*

    Have a wonderful Labor Day :D

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  60. Dear Dawn-
    God Bless you for asking others to pray for other children. So many times we put our own families first, and forget how incredibly blessed we are with children who are healthy. Somehow those tubes in the ears are nothing compared to what others are facing. My own children went thru the tubes too, but Thank God we haven't faced life threatening illness.
    I will pray for your family during surgery time. I will also pray that God finds you decent transportation!
    Thanks again for mentioning those other children who need are prayers now.
    Beth- Mississippi MOM-

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  61. You are a funny one. I often say, you just have to laugh so you wont' cry! I feel your pain. Truely, some of our vehichles over the years required the addition of plywood on the floor so that if we drove through some puddles we were soaked from the knees down. Right now the worst thing about the van, other than the occasional refusal to start is that the previous owner hit a deer and we never replaced the hood. The benefit, people seem to move out of my way.

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  62. Your Fred Flinstone brake comment made me laugh! Just recently I had some work done on my car and sson after I left my brakes were not working properly. I called and went back the next day. The guy said my brakes were not working at all, it was all my legs making the car stop!! They had bumped the brake line and it had come off, so there's was no air pressure. LOL!

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  63. Wow!!! I just laughed so hard!!! I don't know why that hit me so hard today, maybe because I just sat through church and it was kinda boring. Oh well, it was funny anyhow.
    My 5 year old just had that same surgery. She had her adenoids removed as well. She keeps getting ear infections and has fluid just like your little ones. Everything will be okay, i'm sure you know that! If I lived near you, I would definately give you a ride, or let you borrow my car. I feel like I know you that well! Once again, thanks for sharing your life with us.

    Tami

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  64. Your car is only MOSTLY dead? I am sure if you search in the couch cushions of you enough for a miracle!! Have fun storming the castle.

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  65. HI, Yes, I am another avid reader and fan of your blog! : ) I know everyone says you remind them of Erma Bombeck, but I think your witty tongue in cheek style reminds me of Dave Barry's.

    All in all, whomever you remind us of, we love you and your work.

    Thanks for enouraging us, brightening our days and helping us to enjoy our kids more!

    I wish you all the best.
    God Bless you and yours,
    Felice

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  66. I know what you mean about your van,,I was trying to leave the dentist office last week and when I got in my van it wouldn't start. I ended up being late to my class!

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  67. I have tears streaming down my face from laughing!! Your blog is always the highlight of my day!

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  68. Good luck to your son (or was it daughter) with his tonsil + surgery.

    Healing blessings to those you listed for prayers.

    Success on finding a affordable car that actually works and runs on love alone.

    Keep your chin up and smile .... even when you have no reason to.
    korkie

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  69. Dawn, I just love that you are using your suddenly popular forum here to call out for others in need. More power to ya girl! Many prayers headed their way.

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  70. Hey, you could always auction off one of the kids to purchase a new vehicle! Look what a measley sewing pattern brought in for you! $$$$ Possibly the person who bought the sewing pattern would want a "real, live mannequinn" who will also burp, spit, stinker, etc. Just a thought - you do so well with your hysterical auctions! Hang in there, mama!

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  71. It's almost as if we could be twins, I have six kids ( 22, 20, 18, 7, 6 and 4, so help me Lord) and a crap mobile that smells of wet dog and other unidentified awfulness. My car is 17 years old, I pray for it's wellness because if it dies, we are so stuffed! May yours get well soon and be fixable by your husband, how lucky to have a man who can fix it for you, mine stares at me and nods when I tell him what noise my car is making and I know I am on my own. Love your blog although it is so close to how my life is I sometimes get a cold sweat reading it!

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  72. I feel your pain. My very young Dodge Caravan kicked the bucket after a long and brave battle with everything.

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  73. Hi Dawn,
    yes, I'm another one from the E-bay auction.
    Having crashed my mother's car last week, on my first drive on my own since I got my license, I feel for your own car woes.
    Has anyone mentioned paid blogging as a way to earn money?
    I'm not really sure of how it works,
    but this girl does:

    http://mountaineermusings.com/?p=4056

    She has other posts on the subject, so if I didn't pass the right one (it's 11.40 PM, so it could be) make sure to check the others.
    Wish you the best

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  74. Aloha from sunny Hawaii. What an entertaining exhausting life you must lead. You will most likely be getting dozens of people in the next few days... Saw your ebay comments on a friends link and i'll be following your exploits with interest and well wishes. You have a lovely family!
    Mahalo for the peek into your life.

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  75. Love your blog.
    Have to comment about the dairy, just have to...when reading your last post I also noticed the yogurt thing and mentioned it to my husband...

    Anyway, not that this will necessarily be enough to fix your kid's problem at this point, but cutting out the dairy will improve all of these issues, especially the drainage. Dairy is not great for any kid with phlegm retention of production.
    "Got Milk?" Advertising campaign.
    Calcium? Important nutrient.

    Thanks for all the laughs. You keep me humble when I am in tears over my ONE baby driving me nuts.

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  76. To me, the best part of this whole wonderful post is your last paragraph. I am going to read it to my wife. Yippee!

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  77. Your car story reminds me of when I was growing up in a family of five and a new car to us was always a very used car that would last a year. The year always seem to end on the way to or from our family vacation. One year the car was so bad that my parents decided to drive home at night so as to avoid traffic (8 hours from Northern Wisconsin to Chicago) and after we got off the interstate and had to make stops, my dad would slow the car down and he and my mom would both put a foot out the door to help drag that ton of steel to a stop. Looking back I cannot even believe we ever made it to adulthood. They did their best with a lot of improvising.

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  78. Mom of six here and I agree on the dairy. Some kids are just born with the gene that says "large tonsils". We've had tonsils removed in two and my oldest has had four sets of tubes. We're waiting for him to "grow into his ears"!!! And we're watching the next two to see when the "right" time is to take theirs. My husband had his out two years ago (the giver of the gene) - that was not pretty! And you're right in the big scheme of things - it's minor stuff.

    As for the car...I swore I never would, but I'm driving a 15 passenger van. It's big, the kids have room (and room for friends when I'm feeling really crazy), and people get out of my way! It's built to be rough with. Sure, I miss the heated seats, and more than just two cup holders, but I can haul groceries, stroller, kids, lawn chairs.......

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  79. My 5-year-old MISSES our old stinky van, gives us sad puppy dog eyes and plays travel agent for guilt trips that we donated that Thing That Went Bump in the Night and Day. I guess he has the gift of mercy, feels for the hurting, even if its guts are made of steel.

    Anyway, ditto on the yogurt observation. Chronic fluid in the ears from chronic yogurt inhalation was my second son's problem for five years. Then my hubby made the connection. We cut him off yogurt cold turkey (that combo sounds terrible side-by-side but you know what I mean). No more problems.

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  80. Hi, Dawn,
    Just wanted you to know that YOU do not have selective hearing - I am SURE you heard him you just don't have enough space left to understand and remember all that he said. Please tell me this is true or my own Dear Husband will never believe ME! *lol*
    Thanks for the great laughs. Sent your ebay post to many friends and rellies and we all absolutely related. :-)

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  81. I just love your blog. My family has 7 kids, I'm one of them. 4 girls and 3 boys. I'm sure your shopping trip was much like ours. they had to be family trips cause they took all day, and two FULL grocery carts. Since 4 of us kids have moved out (me included) I'm sure my parents lives have gotten a lot less hectic. I think Baby is adorable, I *love* the chocolate picture. I'll be checking in frequently for updates.

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  82. I feel your pain, Dawn, on the car issue. My 18yo mini-van hit 180,000 miles today. We had the transmission rebuilt this past June, sent it back last week because it wasn't working right. The "guys" (dh's term) at the shop said it was a leak and they'd take care of it. Got it back on Wednesday, and it's shifting even worse than *before* we returned it. Makes you wonder what *kind* of leak they meant, doesn't it?

    There went $1300 that I'm not sure we're ever going to benefit from. Add to that the $800 we paid our auto mechanic of 30 years (who really, *really* needs to retire but dh swears we can *trust* him!) to rebuild and recharge our AC system, which *didn't* hold up this summer in the 100+ degree days, and you can tell that I'm ready to chunk this sucker and find something new.

    Only problem is this?

    Where do we get the $$$$?

    Words of wisdom from a mom of 6 to a mom of 5?

    (I heard that snicker!)

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  83. hahaha, love that you have done the tubes surgery tons of times too. i have 6 kids. done tubes or some variation 9 times, multiple times per kid, plus adenoids and tonsils 2 times, and just tubes and adenoids 2x.
    so glad i am not the only mom out here that has done it so much and doesn't worry about it in the least. i am always giving my friends pep talks about it and how it is no big deal! it is just life in my family! sorry to hear about your van! that rots! and i always hate feeling trapped at home since no one has a car big enough to borrow to go anywhere with everyone! you should upgrade to a club wagon! i love my 15 passenger van, the space to separate every one! is heavenly and you can even get up and walk around in the event somebody needs help in the back or has puked. which of course happens more often than i'd like.

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  84. When I was married to my first husband we never had a car for very long. Did they fall apart? No. He reneged on the payments and the car(s) was/were repossessed. We managed with public transport and home deliveries for the grocery shopping.

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  85. When I was a kid I had my tonsils out and my adenoids drained. Just a normal part of growing up. Everyone in my family snores like you wouldn't believe.

    Isn't it nice to know that you not only buy recycled but you also use it up completely!??! ;-)

    Go you! And good luck on the car stuff.

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  86. On behalf of pediatricians everywhere, thank you for keeping it fun and thank you for sticking to the science behind those ear infections!

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  87. Actually, enlarged tonsils/adenoids and fluid in the ears are signs of allergies . . . and dairy allergies are a big culprit in those types of cases.

    We've only had one ear infection with our four kids, and that was when the first was a baby and we hadn't 86'ed the dairy yet. Well, non-cultured dairy. We still use butter, and simple cultured things (raw milk yogurt & cheese, and occasional cottage cheese).

    I don't know if this will actually mean anything or not, but it might be worth a shot getting rid of dairy in the 3-yo's diet for a couple weeks. It's sure a lot cheaper than surgery . . . and with a new van on the horizon . . .

    Best of luck, whatever you choose!

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  88. I've been reading your blog for a couple weeks, and I can't get over the parallels to my own family (despite only having 3 kids at the moment!). It seems that many feel this way as well, but I had to share my van story after reading yours. Ours is about 11 years old, and we've had it for about 8 1/2. We've redone the transmission, and many other things I can't remember (thank goodness for husbands!), but it's paid off, so we've been putting up with quirky little things for a while, even though we keep saying we really need to get a new one since this one is breaking piece by piece. The latest problems were the back door not opening, the driver's side window keep sticking in the all-the-way down position, and more bothersome in late summer, the rear air conditioning vents no longer work. But still, yesterday morning I was thinking that we could probably keep it going for a few more years. Until I was going down the road with the kids at about 45 MPH and the entire passenger side wheel came off!!!! It kept going, but we did not! Like one of your comments said earlier, we always said it was going to fall apart piece by piece. I guess we were right! So we're in the market for a new vehicle too...

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  89. So funny. I sold Tupperware for 10 years, and now sell Avon. My kids are 16,14,12 and 10, so we are past the young age, but I did do a post not to long ago about the "accidents" in the family. I have visited your blog before, but quite a while ago. I started blogging in June. I hope I can keep it up through the school year. Keep up the good work with your posts.

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  90. Ok, for what it's worth, I sent your link to Oprah's website as a suggestion for a future show. I got the obligatory form reply but, you never know...

    p.s. Bless you for letting us know about the sick children who need our prayers. Sheila

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  91. My own DD#2 had sleep apnea as well. Taking out her tonsils and adenoids allowed her to get a full night of sleep (she'd fall asleep while getting dressed for school in the mornings). Improved her attitude and her grades.

    My biggest regret is that it took us so long to figure out what the problem was!

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  92. Be careful of what you discuss in the car! Ours always seems to hear we have an extra dollar and then it demands to have it spent on it. Whats more when we come home it brags to the car next to it and next thing we know it is demanding its time in the shop as well. And you thought they couldnt hear...

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  93. Love your blog, I have seven bro's and sis's so understand your chaos.Somehow in the course of 1 year I went from being a cool dad (kinda of a Einstein/Brad Pitt/Tiger Woods mix) to a Forrest Gump. I have not changed, my son just graduated from middle school to High school freshman and poof! I'm a doofus. Anyway I drive a 20 year old car with 255,000 miles , I work at a cement plant so the car is covered inside and out with gray dust and makes some very loud strange noises. My son is so embarrassed of my car that he makes me drop him off a block from school so nobody sees him in the car. Last week after a very trying morning of him fighting with his sister and his mom I passed the normal "hidden" drop off point and drove right up to the front door of the school and proceeded to help him out of the car (he was hiding on the floorboard)and kissed him on the cheek. I proceeded to get back in the car, lay on horn , rev up the engine and drove off in a cloud of blue smoke. His friends were cheering as I left ! He walks to school now.

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  94. I'll be another person to affirm the dairy theory- I had chronic sinus infections and problems with my tonsils. I stopped eating dairy (except for yogurt)when i was 16 and they completey vanished over a few months. I'm 27 now, and have had only 2 sinus infections since then. Even now, when I eat a grilled cheese or have too much food made with dairy, my ears start itching and i get stuffy. Good luck!

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  95. Dawn: As many, if not most of your readers, I first started reading your blog after being alerted to the ebay listing for the Pokemon cards. Your writing style immediatley reminded me of Erma Bombeck (am I dating myself?!?), and I saw in one of your links that your writing has been compared to hers by others as well. As a medical transcriptionist by trade, I also very much appreciate your skills as a writer. Today I started perusing some of the links on your blog to children and families in need of prayer, and the link to Shriner's Hospitals. My daughter, at age 19, was a patient at our local Shriner's Hospital, while in the process of eventually being diagnosed with a somewhat rare neuromuscular autoimmune disease, polymyositis, which is a distant cousin to muscular dystrophy. She is now 26 and is holding her own, so to speak. She's married, and is still able to work full time. She lives life to the fullest each and every day, because the day where she may be confined to a wheelchair is in the not-too-distant future.

    I just wanted you to know how much I appreciate your links to the pages of such facilities that provide such amazing care to the families that need them.

    God bless you, and keep up the amazing work!

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  96. I JUST found your blog tonight. As I was reading, I read this about the ear thing....

    My 4 year old has an ENT appt on Wed about this. His adanoids are huge and the doc thinks it s causing him to not sleep or breathe well. I am kind of nervous, thinking that he will need surgery.

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